Group steals Confederate monument, threatens to turn it into a Porta John A photo purportedly showing a toilet-inspired modification to a Confederate monument. (White Lies Matter) Military personnel have considerable experience when it comes to fashioning previously unrelated items into bodily waste receptacles. Cut-up milk crates adorned with duct tape for added comfort, wooden ammo crates positioned over dug-out holes, piss pipes, straddle trenches, cat holes, etc. the creativity in the quest for intestinal relief remains unmatched. So, it might impress such lav-savvy service members to learn that one particular group, after stealing a Confederate monument in March from a cemetery in Alabama, is threatening to convert it into a Porta John unless the United Daughters of the Confederacy meet the group’s demands.