that s our beto. that s our beto. greg: ah, yes! [cheers and applause] greg: in today s episode, beto tells us that the world is ending. there s going to be massive migration of tens or hundreds of millions of people from countries that are literally uninhabitable or underwater, that are above the sea right now. this is our final chance. the scientists are absolutely unanimous on this, that we have
no more than 12 years to take incredibly bold action on this crisis. [laughter] greg: he looks like he s conducting the london philharmonic after freebasing a pound of raw cookie dough. [laughter] i haven t seen that much hand movement since i visited this massage parlor in florida. [laughter] of course, you know who else noticed? this guy. i think he s got a lot of hand movement. i ve never seen so much hand movement. i said, is he crazy or is that just the way he acts? so i ve never seen hand movement. i watched him a little while this morning, doing i assume it was some kind of a news conference, and i ve actually never seen anything quite like it. study it, i m sure you ll agree. [laughter] greg: study it. study it, i m sure you ll agree. from now on, that s all you re going to see, beto s hands. and you know what else is great? we re going to get a nickname, weird beto, crazy beto, batty
no more than 12 years to take incredibly bold action on this crisis. [laughter] greg: he looks like he s conducting the london philharmonic after freebasing a pound of raw cookie dough. [laughter] i haven t seen that much hand movement since i visited this massage parlor in florida. [laughter] of course, you know who else noticed? this guy. i think he s got a lot of hand movement. i ve never seen so much hand movement. i said, is he crazy or is that just the way he acts? so i ve never seen hand movement. i watched him a little while this morning, doing i assume it was some kind of a news conference, and i ve actually never seen anything quite like it. study it, i m sure you ll agree. [laughter] greg: study it. study it, i m sure you ll agree. from now on, that s all you re going to see, beto s hands. and you know what else is great? we re going to get a nickname, weird beto, crazy beto, batty
no wonder vanity fair was so in love. how much in love? imagine how a little girl looks at a pony. or a boy at a shiny bicycle under a christmas tree. or michael moore eyeing a twinkie dipped in barbecue sauce. [laughter] a twinkie dipped in barbecue sauce. if you haven t try it, well, you re missings out. but that s how the writer sees beto. now mind you, he wrote a similar valentine to john edwards. that didn t end well. last time i checked, john is guessing people s weight at the carnival. [laughter] the writer isn t the only one going fan boy over beto, half the press keeps referring to him as kennedy-esque, and sadly, they do not mean this one. [laughter] [applause] yes. that s our kennedy. but as i always say, being called kennedy-esque is cool unless they re referring to your driving.
shout-out, a lot of you don t know, i write for the kennedy show on fox business. hey, thank you. [applause] a lot of people say he s a come you can, fox business, how could you do that. i wanted to write for a comedy channel, but cnn wasn t suring. so here we are. i m trying. greg: it is funny, they keep saying he s kennedy-esque, but he looks like a kennedy 4, right? oh, no, definitely third-string kennedy. greg: exactly. the things he s saying, like we re the last hope the earth has. like, i ve heard trump be accused of a lot of things, no one s ever called him the meteor from armageddon. this is embarrassing. greg: what about you, joey, are you inspired by beto? no, believe it or not. you re talking about a guy who is a product of private school that would probably have our kids suffer in public school for the rest of their lives. you re talking about a guy who compared, you know, climate change scientists to the men who