9/24/2022 – Michigan 34, Maryland 27 – 4-0, 1-0 Big Ten Blake Corum hopped outside because he had no choice. There he met a Maryland safety, who deposited his shoulder in Corum's midsection. A defensive end shed Luke Schoonmaker and jumped on Corum from the side. Corum was still a half-yard short of the first down. He wore one 260-pound Terrapin like a cape; the second was trying to break him in half. Corum took a step. He took another step. Tilted forward at a 45-degree angle, he looked like an Scandinavian World's Strongest Man competitor who has been tasked with dragging a semi the length of a football field minus 150 pounds, a foot, and a beard you could knit a suspension bridge out of. He took two more steps, each of of them a Xeno's paradox approaching the first down marker, until finally that impossible line was breached. Eventually the whole thing collapsed into a heap, and Michigan's offense got to keep playing football. On the sideline, I imagine Mike