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Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20141127

[crowd chanting] stephen welcome to the report everybody. Thank you so for joining us. Thanks, everybody. [crowd cheering] thanks for being here. Thank you. Thank you in here out there all around the world, mr. And mrs. America. I want to thank you folks. I want to thank you folk for joining us on this, on this what i believe is the last day of america. [laughter] this is it, nation. No, no, this is it, date we all feared would come, ever since we were told it would come several months ago has come at last. [laughter] because tonight at 8 00 pm mexican standard time. Generalissimo obama announced his unilateral plan to allow four million Illegal Immigrants to remain in america without fear of deportation. It turns out this whole time weve been building that wall to keep them in. [laughter] [applause] submitted for your approval. [laughter] i do not smoke. [laughter] but folk, the president s speech is at 8 00 tonight. We are taping our show at 7 30, so i dont know one word of what hes

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20141121

Once again unfortunately, it is a bad day for people in the world who like brilliance. Here it is, your moment of zen. When you relax like on your second date, you know youll never ask me out again but if you did its a different thing then, because you know, this is our first date. Do you know what youre going to say. I know exactly what youre going to say. Youre going to say i wouldnt respect you. I want to tell you right here and now i would respect you like crazy. [laughter] captioning sponsored by Comedy Central [crowd cheering] [crowd chanting] stephen welcome to the report everybody. Thank you so for joining us. Thanks, everybody. [crowd cheering] thanks for being here. Thank you. Thank you in here out there all around the world, mr. And mrs. America. I want to thank you folks. I want to thank you folk for joining us on this, on this what i believe is the last day of america. [laughter] this is it, nation. No, no, this is it, date we all feared would come, ever since we were told

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20141121

Keep them in. [laughter] [applause] submitted for your approval. [laughter] i do not smoke. [laughter] but folk, the president s speech is at 8 00 tonight. We are taping our show at 7 30, so i dont know one word of what hes going to say. But i do know theres only one way to describe it. Its not an executive order, its executive amnesty. The president will prove forward with executive amnesty. Executive amnesty for Illegal Immigrants in this country. Executive amnesty. Executive amnesty. Executive amnesty. Stephen regular amnesty isnt good enough for barrack. My great great grandfather did not come here from ireland to see this country overrun by immigrants. He came here because he killed a guy. I mean what happened to checks and balances served. Theres supposed to be three batches of government. Executive, judicial and spitefl e enertis. The emperor of the United States is going to declare war on the u. S. Constitution. Stephen oh hail barackus maximus. This lawless overreach makes me

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20141127

Captioning sponsored by Comedy Central captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh captioning sponsored by Comedy Central [crowd cheering] [crowd chanting] stephen welcome to the report everybody. Thank you so for joining us. Thanks, everybody. [crowd cheering] thanks for being here. Thank you. Thank you in here out there all around the world, mr. And mrs. America. I want to thank you folks. I want to thank you folk for joining us on this, on this what i believe is the last day of america. [laughter] this is it, nation. No, no, this is it, date we all feared would come, ever since we were told it would come several months ago has come at last. [laughter] because tonight at 8 00 pm mexican standard time. Generalissimo obama announced his unilateral plan to allow four million Illegal Immigrants to remain in america without fear of deportation. It turns out this whole time weve been building that wall to keep them in. [laughter] [applause] submitted for your approval. [laughter] i do not smok

Transcripts For FOXNEWSW Fox News Night With Shannon Bream 20180613

Hello and welcome to fox news night. I am Shannon Bream in washingto washington. President trump telling sean hannity has a rhetoric paved the way for the singapore summit. Di light on the joint military exercises with south korea and how they factor in. Lets take it to ed henry live in singapore. Good eveningr good morning. Thats right. Good morning. Despite theaysayers, the president came, saw, got a deal despite critics trying to talk down the possibility of american success before, during, and after the talks. The president tonights going on offense, talking t sean hannity, trying to sell the deal, telling Sean Kim Jong un is going to start denuclearization virtually immediately with the document they signed together hours ago. The president says this could save millions of lives. We had a very good feel from the beginning and we were able to get something very important done and actually some things ppened after where we are getting rid of certain Missile Research areas, missile t

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