it is almost independence day, give this thought. we keep asking politicians to get things done, get gas cheaper, who will pay my student loan. i was looking at the jfk inauguration speech, you remember the one. ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country. a great line, right? and a gutsy line for a politician. think about it, his first day, he says, my fellow americans, don t look at me, you want something done, do it yourself. that is refreshing and that is what i want to hear more of from now on when i look at candidates, i only have one thing on my wish list. give me one thing and the other things fall into place. give me freedom. it s sad we have to say that, isn t it? it is supposed to be a given. remember the constitution, the first amendment is about freedom, there is a reason founding fathers put it first, thanks old white guys. yeah, yeah. [applause] bureaucratic sas freedom is great, it will have to wait, we re in a climate
with the way this country is going, we re going to be seeing commercials like this. because of the current state of theination, bank failure, sky rocketing crime, civil unrest, inflation and a tenth damn fast and furious movie, the united states government has decided to throw in the towel. that s right, it is the united states of america going out of business sale. enjoy nation-sized savings on bridges and tunnels to note pads and flighter planes. that s right, nuclear powered aircraft carriers priced to move. not to mention rock-bottom prices on courthouses and office buildings. enjoy 3.9% finishing on lightly used national monuments and
yes, you are that, is freedom of speech. you can speculate, opinionate and blowfishiate like we are about to do on tonight s show thchl is america, not canada. say it with me at home, would you? you are allowed to say things that may not be true. things like, i m a journalist. [laughter] or bidenomics is working for the american people. or, i am tall. [laughter] tom: you can say it. let s hear it for freedom and remember the words of jfk, ask not when it became to freedom, those guys didn t ask, they went out and got it. yes, otherwise [applause] tom: go ahead, go ahead. [applause] tom: a little applause.
we moved out of the city so our little sophie could appreciate nature. but then he got us t-mobile home internet. i was just trying to improve our signal, so some of the trees had to go. i might ve taken it a step too far. (chainsaw revs) (tree crashes) (chainsaw continues) (daughter screams) let s pretend for a second that you didn t let down your entire family. what would that reality look like? well i guess i would ve gotten us xfinity. and we d have a better view. do you need mulch? what, we have a ton of mulch. is it possible to protect my business from cyber threats? it is, with comcast business.. helping every connected device stay protected. yours. your employees . even. susan? hers, too. safe. secure. and powered by the next generation 10g network. with comcast business, advanced security isn t just possible.
believe we can have children and take care of them anymore. things we don t do like partake in our freedom, we have been indoctrinated and not believing to get a risk to get it know did. you can t starts a business, you need to work for the government. you don t need to have five kids or you don t need to have them. we institutionized insecurity, insecure people lash out in irrational places and create safe spaces. they call everything ist, racist or misogynist. not to say ists do not exist. they have been learned. it is not within us, spirit of america lives within us. tell me i can t do it, dare me, i will go do it.