Trevor welcome to the daily show. Im trevor noah my guest tonight, host of a new show on c bet, robin thede is joining us tonight, everybody. applause really excited for her. But first i am sure just like many of you, i woke up this morning to the defer stating news coming out of las vegas. Another mass shooting. This time show Even Deadlier than all the other Mass Shootings. And they say that this was the worst on american history. But every shooting is the worst for someone. And you know what blew my mind this morning is when i realized that i have just, like, ive lived in the u. S. And new york for two years now, all right . And in that time there have been 20 Mass Shootings. 20 Mass Shootings in the u. S. Whats been particularly heartbreaking is other than the lives lost, is how i feel like people are becoming more accustomed to this type of news, every single time. I almost know how its going to play out. Were shocked. Were sad, thoughts and prayers and then almost on cue, people
Do you even look at no, no, i cant, i cant. Jimmy what about your parents . Did they look at their criticisms . No, no. Jimmy they never do . Healthy mentality. If you believe the good ones, you have to believe the bad ones. If you believe every one, why am i reading about myself . Jimmy but you did know this one had 100 . Yeah, because your producer told me. [ laughter ] jimmy oh, okay, he told me as well. Hes like, did you know you had 100 . I was like, what, no, because nobody tells me anything. It was awesome. Jimmy i see, i see. Yeah, it was you know. Jimmy we talked about this book with the parties and stuff like that. When you were a teenager, did you ever like throw a party that your parents werent aware of . Oh, yeah, yeah. I talk about one of them in the book a little bit. And its by thought our parents were out of town. We were older, late teens. Jimmy thats the time where trouble happens, yeah. We were, you know my parents liked to party. Theyre very like open. Opendoor typ
An as tried passed by the earth, missed us by 26,000 miles. Which in space temples is close. In fact, the asteroid was planning to hit us, then it saw whats going on down here and said, you know what . Im going to keep going that way, i want no part of that. President trump this morning got to work doing the damage the asteroid couldnt. Today he signed an executive order that threatens to cripple the Affordable Care act, obamacare. Hes been very focused on doing this. He tweeted, since congress cant get its act together on health care, ill be using the power of the pen to give Great Health Care to many people fast. This is big, usually when trump uses the power of the pen its to declare bankruptcy. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] but he was so fired up, so fired up about this executive order, he almost forgot to sign it. We will have Great Health Care in our country. Thank you all very much. Appreciate it. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you. Jimmy oh, yeah, all r
Leaves first question what is the name of the invisible force that holds us to the earth . President trump . Frankly, people still dont know all of the facts. No, we do know the facts. Weve known since the 1700s. Secretary tillerson, your answer . Im not going to deal with petty stuff like that. I wouldnt call it petty. Its the cornerstone of all physics. Back to you, president trump. When i make a statement, i like to be correct. I dont blame you, but you havent yet made one. Gentlemen, lets go over the rules. In order for us to assess your intelligence, you need to at least attempt to answer the question secretary tillerson, your answer in. I have answered that question repeatedly. No, no, you havent. Please, take a guess. I do not, and i will not operate that way. Both are morons but more importantly, were all screwed both are morons were all screwed its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, russias secret pokemon play. Plus, stephen welcomes conan obrien. And tig notaro. Fea
Featuring the legendary roots crew. Questlove 758. Steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause ] oh, my goodness that is a hot crowd. [ cheers and applause ] hi. Hi, how are you . Welcome, welcome, thank you very much. Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome. Welcome, welcome. Welcome, welcome. Welcome to the tonight show [ cheers and applause ] this is it. This is the show to be at. [ cheers and applause ] new york city. Welcome, everybody. Well, heres what people are talking about. Theres still a lot of leaks coming out of the white house, saying that trumps really coming unraveled. I guess hes been Walking Around repeating himself over and over. [ laughter ] in response trump said that is totally false. [ light laughter ] and totally false. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] not to mention, totally false. Did you guys hear this . Today trump said that he met with the president of the u. S. Virgin islands, even though he is actually the president [ laughter ]