Dear How to Do It,
I have been masturbating to porn for most of my adult life. My wife and I have been together for eight years now, and I was pretty open with her when we met that that’s what I did. Our goal was to have absolutely no secrets from each other. It was already clear back then that this habit of mine made her highly uncomfortable, so I tried to kick it. The habit eventually came back, and she didn’t know about it until a bit over a year ago when it created a huge breach of trust in our relationship. So, I’ve tried to kick the habit again. And again. And again. It’s now at the point where she’s watching my every move like a hawk to make sure I don’t look at other women in secret. She says she has no problem with the act of masturbating, it’s the fact that I can have sexual attraction to random other women to the point of being turned on and acting on it that bothers her. That’s all I had for most of my twenties before meeting her, and that unfortunately