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Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20130315

Jon thats our show. Here it is your moment zen. A new Jersey Assembly man is in the hot seat for facebook pages. He virtually high captioning sponsored by Comedy Central captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org [the colbert report theme music playing] [cheers an captioning sponsored by Comedy Central cheers and applause [crowd chanting stephen] stephen welcome to the report, everybody. Good to have you with us. Please, nation, sit down. As an american i dont like to talk about other countries that are not us. With their crazy names notamericastan. [laughter] but tonight, every single story i will be reporting on comes from another country. Im not happy about it either. Blame the u. N. [laughter] first up, a story that is rocking theworld of meat. The united kingdoms Meat Industry is in disarray after horse meat was discovered in products intended for humans. Food giant nestle suspending some of its deliveries after traces of horse dna were found in the meat. Stores in

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20130315

April something. Look it up. Jon your bands next performance is. Well well be out here y jon thats our show. Here it is your moment zen. A new Jersey Assembly man is in the hot seat for facebook pages. He virtually high captioning sponsored by Comedy Central captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org [the colbert report theme music playing] [cheers an captioning sponsored by Comedy Central cheers and applause [crowd chanting stephen] stephen welcome to the report, everybody. Good to have you with us. Please, nation, sit down. As an american i dont like to talk about other countries that are not us. With their crazy names notamericastan. [laughter] but tonight, every single story i will be reporting on comes from another country. Im not happy about it either. Blame the u. N. [laughter] first up, a story that is rocking theworld of meat. The united kingdoms Meat Industry is in disarray after horse meat was discovered in products intended for humans. Food giant nestle suspe

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20130315

Jon thats our show. Here it is your moment zen. A new Jersey Assembly man is in the hot seat for facebook pages. He virtually high captioning sponsored by Comedy Central captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org [the colbert report theme music playing] [cheers an captioning sponsored by Comedy Central cheers and applause [crowd chanting stephen] stephen welcome to the report, everybody. Good to have you with us. Please, nation, sit down. As an american i dont like to talk about other countries that are not us. With their crazy names notamericastan. [laughter] but tonight, every single story i will be reporting on comes from another country. Im not happy about it either. Blame the u. N. [laughter] first up, a story that is rocking theworld of meat. The united kingdoms Meat Industry is in disarray after horse meat was discovered in products intended for humans. Food giant nestle suspending some of its deliveries after traces of horse dna were found in the meat. Stores in

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20130222

[laughter] you stole my youth [laughter] i finally catch a ball, and this is what you do. Hey, make sure you follow me on twitter so we can live chat during the shows. Check out my tour schedule. And keep up with our daily blog over at comedycentral. Com tosh. 0. Comedy central didnt want me to show you this gross eyeball video at the beginning of our show because theyre afraid youll change the channel, so i said, fine, i wont show one at the beginning, but im gonna show a bunch at the end. [audience ohing] lovely. Enjoy your leadin, jon stewart. See you next week. Good night. [cheers and applause] [the colbert report theme music playing] [cheers an captioning sponsored by Comedy Central cheers and applause [crowd chanting stephen] stephen welcome to the report, everybody. Good to have you with us. Please, nation, sit down. As an american i dont like to talk about other countries that are not us. With their crazy names notamericastan. [laughter] but tonight, every single story i will b

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20130221

Captioning sponsored by Comedy Central captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org and applause] jon thats our show. Join us tomorrow at 11 00. Here it is your moment of zen. If you want to protect yourself get a Double Barrel shotgun. Put it and fire two blasts outside the house. I promise you who is coming in is not you dont need an [the colbert report theme music playing] [cheers an captioning sponsored by Comedy Central cheers and applause [crowd chanting stephen] stephen welcome to the report, everybody. Good to have you with us. Please, nation, sit down. As an american i dont like to talk about other countries that are not us. With their crazy names notamericastan. [laughter] but tonight, every single story i will be reporting on comes from another country. Im not happy about it either. Blame the u. N. [laughter] first up, a story that is rocking theworld of meat. The united kingdoms Meat Industry is in disarray after horse meat was discovered in products intended f

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