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Why Gareth Southgate is the ultimate midlife crush Do all peri-menopausal women have a thing for the reassuring England manager? The dashing Gareth Southgate Some crushes rewrite all the rules of sex appeal. For 30 years, I said I’d rather eat slugs than kiss a man in a waistcoat. But now, like a lightning bolt on a summer’s day, I’ve had an erotic epiphany: there’s something blazingly magnetic about a furrow-browed bloke who’s not afraid to don a charcoal-grey, buttoned jerkin (I should maybe mention that knitted, polka-dot tie too). I am, of course, talking about Gareth Southgate. Nor am I alone in this eureka moment. Across the land, peri-menopausal women are gushing about Gareth and indulging in harmless fantasies where the England manager displays everyday prowess and decency – rescuing their cats from trees, driving a tow-truck to their stricken car, or delivering their baby in a taxi.

United statesUnited kingdomDaniel craigMatt hancockAlex fergusonTom cruiseJohn noakesJerome flynnMadeleine brettinghamMichael goveSam allardyceDavid attenboroughBrian coxPatrick vallanceBrian cloughGareth southgate