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Last modified on Thu 6 May 2021 14.04 EDT ‘WE USED TO WALK ALONG THE RIVER’ The Fiver is often accused of not taking football seriously enough. It is a charge to which we happily plead guilty at Fiver Towers. A leading reason behind the chortlesome [easy – Fiver Ed] knockabout chat that this merry Tin-swilling band of interchangeable cranks pumps out every working-day tea-time FOR FREE is that everyone else takes it all so bloody seriously. The crack of anxiety in the voice of a TV commentator as he builds up to Preston v Reading. The vigorous defences of Our League by the hushed, menacing tones of Graeme Souness. The darkening of Roy Keane’s already pitch-black eyes as Micah Richards riffs on tales of Joe Hart singing the greatest hits of Elkie Brooks. Jermaine Jenas’s primal screams against VAR. Hang on. Wasn’t this supposed to be fun?

United kingdomBrighton and hoveJoe hartMark mcfaddenRoy keaneGraeme sounessBarney ronayEd sheeranZinedine zidaneElkie brooksJohn caleyJermaine jenasGareth baleVillarreal manuel triguerosSergio ramosNgolo kant