Alma and Joseph Gildenhorn Book Talk with Amanda Ripley and Garrett Graff
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About High Conflict:
When we are baffled by the insanity of the “other side” in our politics, at work, or at home it’s because we aren’t seeing how the conflict itself has taken over.
That’s what “high conflict” does. It’s the invisible hand of our time. It’s what happens when discord distills into a good-versus-evil kind of feud, the kind with an us and a them. In this state, the brain behaves differently. We feel increasingly certain of our own superiority and, at the same time, more and more mystified by the other side.
How to Resolve a Conflict When You Hate Your Opponentâs Guts
Credit.Jesse Reed
By Yascha Mounk
By Amanda Ripley
In the late 1970s, Jay and Lorna walked into the legal offices of Gary Friedman. After years of marriage, they had decided to call it quits. But instead of going through an adversarial process, they wanted somebody to help them disentangle their lives with as little belligerence as possible. That someone, they hoped, would be Friedman.
Friedman declined. It seemed improper for one lawyer to represent two parties to the same conflict. He had never heard of such a thing. Apologetically, he told his old friends that each of them would have to hire separate counsel. But Jay and Lorna insisted. And since Friedman had long disliked the fierce antagonism of the courtrooms in which he had shone as a young trial lawyer, he decided to give the unusual suggestion a try.