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Hovis Friday dairy: I m a medical miracle – not a lazy, work-shy layabout!

Dear Diary So, finally it’s come to an end. No, I don’t mean the humans wearing muzzles (although frankly I’m not sure looking at the state of some of them that they should be allowed to graze freely any time soon), but more my early retirement. It looks like the school is now ready for […]

Ross kempHoverine airlines

Hovis Friday diary: I have looked death in the eye and kicked him in the goolies

Hovis Friday diary: I have looked death in the eye and kicked him in the goolies
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Gary barlowHoverine airlinesLong john silverTeam hovisCool new shoes manFormula oneAunty emilyகேரி பார்லோநீண்டது ஜான் வெள்ளிகுளிர் புதியது காலணிகள் மனிதன்சூத்திரம் ஒன்றுஅத்தை எமிலி

Hovis Friday diary: I am still firmly grounded

Dear diary, The last thing that seemed to last as long as the human strangles epidemic was mini-mother’s class recorder recital when they were five-years-old: apparently, the lasting damage to mental and physical health of those in the audience was at a similar level of severity also… Clearly heroic strides are being made in terms […]

Jimmy chooHoverine airlinesCaptain cavemanCool new shoes manGerman needle manஜிம்மி சூகேப்டன் குகை மனிதன்குளிர் புதியது காலணிகள் மனிதன்ஜெர்மன் ஊசி மனிதன்

Hovis Friday diary: we cannot un-see the sights we were subjected to

Credit: Karen Thompson Dear diary, It’s day please-god-I-will-sacrifice-barbie-boy-to-make-it-all-stop of the human strangles epidemic. After a year of being locked down with increasingly feral humans obsessed with using us as the only reason they leave the house, I didn’t think ANYTHING could make it worse. I was wrong. For this week, mother nature proved she is indeed the most evil of women as she put that lesser seen shining orb into the sky. And the humans started taking their clothes off. It was like watching a Green Peace video on saving beached walruses, combined with some sort of David Attenborough piece on a lesser known maggot larvae pupating. I have never been so grateful in my life to now be blind in one eye at least I could turn away as across the land, masses of flabby flesh came out from under the frankly forgiving camouflage concealment of lounge pants and dressing gowns. It was like a remake of dawn of the dead. Only the dead are skinnier. As fellow

Naomi campbellDavid attenboroughImelda marcoHoverine airlinesCool new shoes manGerman needle manMrs hermanநவோமி கேம்ப்பெல்டேவிட் அட்டன்பரோஇமெல்ட மார்கோகுளிர் புதியது காலணிகள் மனிதன்ஜெர்மன் ஊசி மனிதன்திருமதி ஹெர்மன்