CHRISTOPHER STEVENS: The 18 candidates on this year s The Apprentice (BBC1) are so miserably thick that their combined intellects are barely enough to match one average idiot.
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Dear Liz, I m having trouble with my electric kettle. It takes much too long to boil. Any ideas? Liz says: Um. I understand how. Worried people like you. Are about your kettles. And that is why.