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A monster of our making: Rabbi Efrem Goldberg calls for a new approach to shıdduchim
Photos: Coco Productions
It’s a time-honored part of the shidduch process to investigate a prospect’s personality, family background, and history before meeting in person.
But over the years, the “information gathering” has taken new, disturbing proportions. Attempts to clarify relevant information have morphed into efforts to hunt down the slightest flaw or blemish. And along the way, we’ve transformed the shidduch process from a journey of discovery to a skewed funhouse mirror that denies one side’s shortcomings or struggles while magnifying those of others to grotesque proportions.