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there s a new european crisis brewing right now, rivals anything we ve seen this year and i m referring to butterlessness. i know this is not a word, but people, for the love of biscuits, how are they supposed to cook for the holidays without the butter? do you have any i have of hour holiday cooking involves butter, cookies, pies, cakes? we ve crunched the numbers up here, 97% butter in everything you eat. such a large part of our lives, in fact, that stephen colbert took the shortage of butter as an opportunity to trump america s lead in the field of fattiness. let me say to all nye norwegian viewers, in your face, norgies. america lives again because we live in a putter toneia.

Crisis brewingStephen colbertNye norwegianPutter toneia