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Many sincere, tearful apologies later and a promise to make it up to them and be a better friend, the call ended. You sat down and processed it all.
How could you have not noticed?
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The question of what experiences and people shape who we are can be murky for some yet have remarkable clarity for others.
Listening to Lawyers Club of San Diego President Yahairah Aristy for even a few moments makes clear that she is firmly rooted in that latter camp. Her life is testimony to a play on an old adage: behind every strong woman, there is a group of strong women who have supported, nurtured and prepared her for success.
The guiding light of her young life was provided by her grandmother, a native of the Dominican Republic who immigrated to New York City when Aristy’s mother was 13 years old. Born and raised in Manhattan with a couple of happy years in the Dominican Republic for middle school, Aristy benefited from her grandmother’s wisdom and warmth as she helped raise Aristy when her mother battled addiction. That foundation helped her overcome a brief yet sad time in foster care before being emotionally lifted by yet another strong woman.
“Even though we have endured the segregation and discrimination that we endured, we excelled because we had a hand up,” Joe told NBC 7.
While Joe will be the first to tell you his experience is different than most Black experiences, it wasn’t without challenges. Both he and his wife, Ernestine, were raised in Detroit.
Ernestine went to segregated schools, and Joe lived in and attended school in a predominantly white community where things weren’t always fair in the classroom.
“Gone are the days when my head is bending low I hear the tender voices calling on old black Joe,” said Joe as he recounted a racially insensitive song his grade school teacher taught students.