“Umukenyezi”. That’s a word Burundian men usually use to describe their ideal woman: “the one who ties her loincloth on thorns and walks without flinching and without the outside world noticing her pain”, as it literally translates from the local language Kirundi.
It serves them as a metaphor of what they expect from a wife: a woman who carries the burden of marriage with her head held high and her mouth shut.
And the husband is supposed to be an “umushingantahe”, or “the one who embodies power, respect and value”.
These are not only words. Without a man by her side, a Burundian woman, who by law has no right to inherit property, can turn into an outcast with nowhere to live. Yet having a husband is no guarantee of a happy life either: domestic violence is a scourge in this small East African country.