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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20131213

State your namest defenders of christmas to keep the spirit of the season when christmas its very essence is under constant siege by someone, something. [laughter] its the subject of the new segment war on christmas bleep getting weird edition. First up. [ laughter ] the general patton of the war on christmas. Theres a crazier topic out there. Remember this classic seinfeld moment. Out of that a new holiday was born a festivus for the rest of us. Thats a classic ep said. The ep said was funny but not festivus. Jon yes, that episode was funny but not festivus the central comedic part of the episode. Not funny. Why is it not a holiday for the rest of us. A nearly six foot tall festivua Festivus Pole made of beer cans is going to go on display at the florida capital. Not kidding. Jon who gives a bleep . Cant you just pretend its a place for the wisemen to tie up the camels. How about that . You are turned about that pole. Its florida. You are lucky theres not a stripper named christmas sw

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20131214

Beer cans is going to go on display at the florida capital. Not kidding. Jon who gives a bleep . Cant you just pretend its a place for the wisemen to tie up the camels. How about that . You are turned about that pole. Its florida. You are lucky theres not a stripper named christmas swinging on it. Have you been to florida . I apologize you are upset ynch do i have to drive around with my kids to look for nativity scenes and be like oh, yeah kids theres baby jesus behind the festivus poll made out of pole made out of beer cans. Its nuts. [ laughter ] jon yes, that sounds relatively nuts. [laughter] why are you driving around [laughter] looking for nativity scenes in the car when you could just bring your kids to where you work where you put a giant nativity scene out on the plaza. [ laughter ] but as much as im used to gretchens yearly manger danger warnings a little surprised to see megyn kelly going full christmas nothing. On slate. Com they have a piece about santa claus should not b

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20131213

Christmas to keep the spirit of the season when christmas its very essence is under constant siege by someone, something. [laughter] its the subject of the new segment war on christmas bleep getting weird edition. First up. [ laughter ] the general patton of the war on christmas. Theres a crazier topic out there. Remember this classic seinfeld moment. Out of that a new holiday was born a festivus for the rest of us. Thats a classic ep said. The ep said was funny but not festivus. Jon yes, that episode was funny but not festivus the central comedic part of the episode. Not funny. Why is it not a holiday for the rest of us. A nearly six foot tall festivua Festivus Pole made of beer cans is going to go on display at the florida capital. Not kidding. Jon who gives a bleep . Cant you just pretend its a place for the wisemen to tie up the camels. How about that . You are turned about that pole. Its florida. You are lucky theres not a stripper named christmas swinging on it. Have you been to

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20131213

Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart. [daily show theme song playing] [cheers and applause] jon welcome to the daily show. My name is jon stewart. Weve got a good one for you tonight. My guest evangeline lilly. But first i dont know what that was. [laughter] we all know christmas is everyones favorite holiday, everyones. Earchs. [ laughter ] everyones. [ laughter ] but its difficult for even the state your namest defenders of christmas to keep the spirit of the season when christmas its very essence is under constant siege by someone, something. [laughter] its the subject of the new segment war on christmas bleep getting weird edition. First up. [ laughter ] the general patton of the war on christmas. Theres a crazier topic out there. Remember this classic seinfeld moment. Out of that a new holiday was born a festivus for the rest of us. Thats a classic ep said. The ep said was funny but not festivus. Jon yes, that episode was funny but

Transcripts For CNNW CNN Newsroom With Poppy Harlow And Jim Sciutto 20190829

But for puerto rico a sign of relief, dorian just missing the island as the island recovers from Hurricane Maria. Do we have anymore Data Information as to where its going to hit on the mainland . Not really. Were going to see now updates every six hours, jim. For a while we were getting them every three hours because there were watches and warnings in effect. Now for the next three days probably the updates will only come in the next six hours. We call it 50z, 6z, 12z and the like. But somewhere in the ballpark our next one is going to be at 11 00 a. M. Eastern. 24 mooirpz, thats the storm right now. What changed last night is landfall wind speed at 125 now. Hurricane hunter about to make the core punch. Theres the center of the eye, theres the plane, comes down and turns right towards the middle. Its going to move this far in 24 hours, this far another 24 hours. So were 72 hours from being right there. And then it tries to stop. Dont they always . Theres another 24 hours and theres t

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