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How I Learned To Stop Suppressing And Love the Chainsaw

How I Learned To Stop Suppressing And Love the Chainsaw The director of this year s Chainsaw Awards reveals what went on behind the curtain. By Xanthe Pajarillo · @xanthepajarillo · April 20, 2021, 4:45 PM EDT The fearless leader, Xanthe Pajarillo! “What was it like directing the Chainsaw Awards?” Upon hearing this question, I’m flooded with a slew of images: all-nighters with editor Shaman Marya and sound designer/post mixer Saranya Nayak for editing and sound, rehearsing over Zoom with Smiling Beth and host David Dastmalchian, shot listing with DP Tara Jenkins… it all felt like a swirling dream, as if everything happened yesterday. But there’s one moment that sits vividly among the others. The morning of our first test day, my mother received a call from the Philippines. She turned and said, “Your Auntie Maripe has died.”

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