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Featuring noah cyrus, and the legendary roots crew. Questlove show 800. Steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy im speechless, thats what we want. That is exactly a hot crowd tonight. Welcome to the tonight show. Straight from new york city,. [ cheers and applause ] thank you for being here. This is what this is what everybody is talking about. I saw that tomorrow, President Trump will have his First Physical since taking office. [ light laughter ] theyll get off to a weird start when he eats an entire jar of cotton balls because he thinks theyre marshmallows. [ laughter and applause ] these are pretty stale. Youll know trump eats a lot of junk food when the doctor puts his stethoscope to his chest and trumps heart whispers, help me [ laughter and applause ] wall. Covfefe. [ laughter ] yep, its his First Physical. There will be another awkward moment when trump tells the doctor hes sexually active and from the waiting room melania yells, fake news [ laughter and applause ] steve hey jimmy hey steve oh jimmy heyo close the door some privacy in this place steve thats why we need a a wall jimmy yeah [ laughter ] we have to build a soundproof wall in the doctors office. You guys see this . Time magazine just came out with a new issue that talks about trumps first year in office. Take a look at the cover there. [ laughter ] when he saw that, trump said, weird, i dont even remember taking that photo. [ laughter and applause ] i look good. I look great. Some Business News here, the ceo of Dominos Pizza announced that he is stepping down this summer. [ audience aws ] hell carefully pack up his office, then get home and find that all his stuff is stuck to the top of the box. Then you go. [ laughter and applause ] and after being out of business for years, circuit city announced that they are Opening Stores again. [ cheers ] yeah, they said they couldnt wait to fax their employees the news. [ laughter and applause ] hang up the phone, ill try it again. [ modem connecting ] oh, this is kind of funny, at the Consumer Electronics show in las vegas, lg had this big presentation to show off its robot thats nicknamed chloe. Trouble. Its always a bummer with watch this. Chloe, am i ready on my washer cycle . [ laughter ] chloe, whats for dinner tonight . [ laughter ] okay, chloe is not going to talk to me. Chloe doesnt like me, evidently. Chloe, are you talking to me yet . What recipes could i make with chicken . [ laughter ] okay. Jimmy yeah. Afterwards alexa was like, you froze, kid. [ laughter and applause ] they couldnt get chloe to work, but then he was like, oh, wait a minute, her name is courtney. Courtney, how do you bake a a chicken . 30 minutes. Jimmy thank you. Wrong kardashian, sorry. [ laughter ] meanwhile, vermont could become the first state to legalize Recreational Marijuana throu [ cheers ] yeah. Then the state full of ben jerrys and snowboarders said, oh, good, we can finally start smoking weed. Yeah. Finally. Wonder what that will be like. [ laughter and applause ] this made me laugh. The other day in brazil, a a woman went bowling and it didnt really turn out the way she planned. Take a look at this. [ speaking Foreign Language ] [ scream ] [ thud ] [ laughter ] jimmy yeah, then then she hit the other two tvs to get a spare. [ laughter and applause ] all right, you guys, we have a a great show tonight. Give it up for the roots. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thank you very much, roots. [ cheers and applause ] we have got a fantastic show tonight. We love this guy so much. He is the best and hes one of our favorite guests and weve just weve known him forever. I love this guy so much. Hes having an incredible week. He won a golden globe last weekend and this weekend [ cheers and applause ] yeah, he won and this weekend, he is hosting saturday night live. Sam rockwell is here tonight steve yeah [ cheers and applause ] hes the best. Jimmy he is the best, man. Steve yeah. Jimmy hes fantastic in this movie and every movie. We love him, but this movie whew. Hes really good. Yeah, yeah, i want to talk to him about all that stuff. Also from the amazon series, one mississippi, the very funny tig notaro is stopping by. Steve oh [ cheers and applause ] jimmy tig and weve got great music from alan walker featuring noah cyrus. [ cheers and applause ] alan walker featuring noah cyrus. Plus tonight, we have two surprise guests will be joining us. Steve oh jimmy for charades. [ rs guys, its time for tonight show hashtags, here we go. [ cheers and applause ] Hashtags Hashtags jimmy awe, thank you very much, everybody. We do this thing every week where i send out a hashtag and we ask you guys to respond to that topic. So since the new season of the bachelor just started [ cheers ] yeah, i know. You guys have you all seen it yet . Or not yet . [ cheers ] its a slow slow build. Steve slow build, yeah. Jimmy well, since the new season of the bachelor just started and i sent out a a hashtag called worstfirstdate. The worst first date. I asked you guys to send us stories about the worst first dates youve ever seen. Within 30 minutes it was a a trending topic in the u. S. We were trending [ cheers and applause ] we were trending number three steve thats great jimmy yeah, yeah. And i now i thought id share some of my favorite worst first date stories for you guys. This first one is from joroh she says, i was really into this guy, but i was so nervous on our first date that when he told me, you smell good, i replied, thanks, i use both of my nostrils. [ laughter and applause ] i use both of my nostrils. This one is from annabanana0626. She says, i was walking ahead of him and got into the car parked out front before he could open the door for me. He knocked on the window and yelled through the glass, this isnt my car. [ laughter and applause ] its a mercedes benz, i kind of like it. Steve yeah. Jimmy whose car is this . Steve ill wait. This one is from foreversmiling2. She says, on my first date, my first time even at a sushi place, i decided to order thirteen rolls. I thought rolls meant individual pieces of sushi. The servers had to push two tables together just to hold them all there. [ cheers and applause ] thirteen rolls of sushi. Well, whatever you say. Bring em keep brining em. This ones from snookicookie16. She says, at the end of the night, he acted like he was going in for a kiss, then put his whole mouth over my nose and blew into it. He laughed and said he does it to his dogs and calls it a a puppy trumpet. [ laughter and applause ] puppy trumpet. Steve puppy trumpet. Garbage person. Its my puppy trumpet, man. Jimmy it said the end of the night at the end of the date, it was the ol puppy trumpet. Steve ol puppy trumpet. Jimmy yeah. [ laughter ] this ones from hotovy. Hotovy . He says, the first time i meant my wife, she was convinced there were 52 states in the u. S. When i suggested there were only 50 states, she called her brother, who confirmed that there were in fact 52 states. [ laughter and applause ] never going to win. Steve theyre married win, dude. Hes married, yeah, hes married. Steve he learned his lesson early. Jimmy exactly, yeah. This ones from patrickah81. He says, i once spilled soda on my crotch while pulling into my dates driveway. My first words when she answered the door were, its not pee. [ laughter and applause ] steve im clean. Jimmy its not pee. Steve yeah, not pee. Jimmy all right, well, what is it . Steve its a little bit of poop. [ laughter ] jimmy this ones from lindachilders1. She said, a friend once set me up on a blind date. I wasnt in a great mood because i had received a a traffic ticket a few hours before. My day got worse when my blind date turned out to be the cop who gave me the ticket. Steve oh what [ audience ohs ] i know you thats fate thats fate jimmy oh, my goodness. This ones from mfonda. She says, on our first date, the guy choked on an omelet and blew an onion out of his nose. [ laughter and applause ] steve he could have used the puppy trumpet. [ laughter ] jimmy thats w steve yeah, thats what you gotta get there. Jimmy thats what you use it for, yeah. Next one is from our very own questlove. Steve oh. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy this is very interesting here. He says, i had dinner with Rosario Dawson and let mos def and his bros crash the party. Mos actually casually ordered her 500 birthday cake. It wasnt her birthday. The bill came to 1400. I didnt have 1400. [ laughter and applause ] that was it . That was it . That was it. Questlove theres only 280 characters, i couldnt go jimmy yeah, yeah. Have you ever tried to go on a a second date, or no . Questlove i didnt get a a second date. [ laughter ] Jimmy Rosario we got to bring this up when she comes on. [ laughter ] thats the greatest tariq, you have a worst first date story . Tariq no, all my first dates, they went swimmingly. [ laughter and applause ] steve swimmingly swimmingly. Jimmy last one here is from ash10g. She says, we had mini makeout, then he fist bumped me and said, nice work. [ laughter and applause ] there you have it. Those are our tonight show hashtags. [ cheers and applause ] to check out more of our favorites, go to tonightshow. Com hashtags. Were playing charades with special guests after the break. Stick around. [ cheers and applause ] resolution 1 binge more. Join the uncarrier, and get four unlimited lines for only forty bucks each. Plus, netflix for the whole family. On us. So, they get their shows. Lets go, girl youre gonna love this bit and you get yours. Watch however you want. On your phone, tablet, or tv. All on americas best unlimited network, tmobile. When this guy got a flat tire in the middle of the night, so he got home safe. Yeah, my dad says our insurance doesnt have that. What . you can leave worry behind when liberty stands with you™. Liberty mutual insurance. Charmin ultra soft its softer than ever. Charmin ultra soft is softer than ever. Okay, this is getting a little weird. Enjoy the go with charmin comat havertys furniture. Ear Savings Event save up to one thousand dollars in bonus discounts. Plus, you can get 24 month financing with no interest. Start the new year by adding stylish pieces throughout your home. With havertys, your home can be perfect, even when life isnt. [sfxcrash] hurry in and save. This sale ends january 15th at havertys. Life looks good. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy welcome back to the tonight show, everybody. Tariq and i are about to play a a game of charades with two very special guests. On tuesday they received the spotlight award from the National Board of review for their film which grossed over 800 million, and is nominated for the Producers Guild award for best picture. Please welcome the director and the star of wonder woman Patty Jenkins and gal gadot. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy come on, pal. Come on. All right. I mean, these guys [ cheers and applause ] now, you all know how to play charades. Each player gets a turn giving silent clues to their teammates. 30 seconds on the clock per turn. Were going to do four rounds. And then the fifth round is a a charades showdown. Both teams give the same clue at the same time. The teams are me and gal versus patty and tariq. Gal, why dont you start us off tonight and lets show them how its done. You got it. Jimmy patty. Patty, you can go right there. Tariq. Just watch the magic. Jimmy yeah, watch the magic. Exactly. You guys, pick a number, any number for gal . Number . [ audience shouts suggestions ] seven. Jimmy alright, we can do this. Remember, the seinfeld episode with seven neven . Nevermind. [ laughter ] you remember. Jimmy okay. Um, okay. Jimmy yeah. Oh, we got this. I can feel it already. Oh, its a song. Three words. First word belt. [ light laughter ] waist. Hip. Hips dont lie [ cheers and applause ] [ harmonizing ] yeah, yeah, yeah. [ talking over each other ] hips dont lie. Jimmy oh, yeah. Shakira [ laughter ] shakira, shakira. All right, im going for nine. Nine, okay. Uh [ laughter ] jimmy well, wait, this is very common. Its a film, of course you would get that. Tariq hush, please [ laughter ] three words. The karate kid . [ cheers and applause ] jimmy karate kid . [ laughter ] you didnt even say kung fu panda . Its like tariq just got tariq i bet you already you already probably knew where i was going, right . Jimmy that was more kung fu than karate. I dont know what that was. Tariq what . Jimmy cmon. Okay, you got it, you got it. Jimmy algh [ audience shouts suggestions ] i heard a very confident four out there. Oooh. Okay. Shoo jimmy okay. [ laughter ] okay. Telepathic connection. Jimmy okay, ready for this . Okay. I hope. Jimmy okay. Um film. Three words. Tariq kung fu panda. Jimmy yeah, right . [ laughter ] all right, ready . One. Single. One. No. Jimmy first word. First word. Jimmy yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. [ laughter ] its short and small end. [ laughter ] three words, number three. [ light laughter ] a chicken. Chicken. [ laughter ] revenge. Very funny dance. [ buzzer ] jimmy why couldnt you get it down . What was it . Jimmy it was the mighty ducks. Tariq oh jimmy oh. Terrible, terrible. I know, i know. Tariq almighty. Jimmy the crowd is trying not to boo. [ talking over each other ] the crowd is trying not to boo right now. [ laughter ] oh, its terrible, oh. Jimmy i could have done mighty, i could have done how do you duck . Uh, you did this. Oh, duck. How do you do that . Yeah. [ audience ohs ] [ laughter ] is it me . Jimmy all right. Okay. We got this. One word oh, no, thats easy. [ laughter ] jimmy what . Arrival. Arrival. Jimmy oh, thats a good guess. Wait, are you what . [ laughter ] time out. Jimmy dont even look at that. What was that . [ laughter ] uh wait. Oh, god [ laughter ] i, uh [ buzzer ] is it jimmy godzilla . Tariq it was twilight. Jimmy twilight . Twilight . Oh, thats nice. Tariq i was thinking, like, a werewolf, a vampire twilight. Tariq the light. It looks like a dinosaur. [ laughter ] tariq ehh. Okay. Jimmy oh, my god. All right, now this is the showdown. Oh, the show down, right. Oh, god, okay. Jimmy patty, you and gal get up. All right. Jimmy now you both okay. Jimmy get the same clue tariq okay. Jimmy and we ka wins the whole shabang. Six. Tariq so then team tariq wins. Got it. [ laughter ] okay. Jimmy were going to do it. Were going to do this. I promise you. Okay. Cool. [ laughter ] jimmy wait, wait, wait. Stop she started already. [ talking over each other ] okay, so look at her in the meantime because i didnt. Tariq its a song. Okay, ready . Jimmy ready. Its a song. Jimmy song. Yeah. Tariq oh dragon. Godzilla. Uh jimmy attack. Love. Tariq hair, hair. Im a panther, lion, tiger. Eye of the tiger. Tiger im a tiger. Jimmy the lion sleeps tonight. [ cheers and applause ] oh, my goodness thats how we redeemed ourselves. Yes. Jimmy we did it gal gadot, right there Patty Jenkins Tariq Trotter well be right back, with sam rockwell, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ] hello, aloe. We said no, no, no to this stuff. And yes, yes, yes to bio renew. Made with active antioxidants that work from the inside out. To help animate lifeless hair, and bring it back to life. Find aahs and oos in every fresh bottle of herbal essences bio renew. Let life in. with 33 individual vertebrae and 640 muscles in the human body, no two of us are alike. 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Now, just 79. 99 per month with a 2year price guarantee with a 2year agreement. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy our first guest is a a fantastic actor. He just won a golden globe award for his work in the film three billboards outside ebbing, missouri. You can catch him hosting saturday night live for the first time this weekend with musical guest halsey. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome sam rockwell [ cheers and applause ] jimmy i love that guy. Sam rockwell. Sam rockwell. Sam rockwell. How are you . Look at that. Standing ovation. Welcome. Hey, man. Jimmy oh, sam rockwell, we are so happy to have you here. Dude jimmy and im so happy for you, dude. Congratulations, man yeah jimmy you did it [ cheers and applause ] jimmy man, well deserved, dude. Thanks, man. Thanks a lot. Jimmy well, well, welldeserved. Thanks, man. Jimmy and so you go from the Golden Globes to snl this weekend. Yeah, yeah. Jimmy youre having a crazy couple of weeks. Its crazy. Jimmy how was the Golden Globes . Was it fun . It was amazing. It was amazing. Yeah, it was like it was incredible. It was like a whirlwind. You know . Jimmy do you know what you do when you get on stage . Or did you freak out . Did you have anything prepared or i had a couple of the bullet points, you know . But i kind of freaked out. Jimmy yeah. It was a yeah, i made an imodium joke. You know . [ laughter ] jimmy yeah, as one does. As one does, you know . Jimmy that one you had written, quite obviously, yeah. Yeah. Jimmy did you go party afterwards . I partied little a bit. Eh, not too much because i knew this week was a big week. Jimmy yeah, but i would go around with my golden globe and be like i would go to, like, taco bell and be like oweeowee. Yeah. [ laughter ] you know whats up. Jimmy youre really going to charge me . Come on. [ laughter ] i just won a golden globe, man. Give me give me give me, something, man. Jimmy a taquito. Give me something off the menu. You got salad, man. Jimmy give me something off the menu. Come on. [ laughter ] yeah. I did go to a few parties. They were very loud. Everybody was sort of calm and very, you know, composed. And then salma hayek grabbed my my globe and she picked it up like a microphone. She started, like, singing to i will survive using my globe. Jimmy yes she was groovin, man. Jimmy shes so fun. Thats what im talking about. Thats what im saying. Shes so fun she didnt care. Jimmy no. She was like just groovin, having a great time. Jimmy thats the best. Awesome girl. Yes. Jimmy see, thats what i would do. Oh, shes so much fun. But you people bring their awards with them. Id never won an award or else i would know that. Yeah. [ laughter ] [ audience aws ] i dont know about that. Is that jimmy yeah. But i won a couple of oscars, no big deal. Yeah, yeah, yeah. [ laughter ] jimmy but, man, you were in a great category, too. Its a fun category. Its a competitive category. Jimmy yeah, but theyre all great. William dafoe, armie hammer, richard jenkins, yeah. Christopher plummer. Jimmy but the thing is that theres not really a we were saying, its not really a a competition really. No, its not. Its ridiculous. Theres no, like theres no finish line. You know, it is like i think George Clooney said we should all play the same part. Like, we should all play batman or hamlet if we are going to compare roles. Jimmy in exact same movie. Yeah. Jimmy exact same script. Yeah. Jimmy same director. Same everyg. The better actor is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. [ laughter ] jimmy yeah. No, i think it was great man. Yeah. Jimmy i loved it. And now i i dont know. Youre hosting snl this week. This is a first time for you. First time, baby, first time. Jimmy i mean, are you psyched . Are you excited for that . Im psyched. Im very [ cheers and applause ] jimmy yeah, i think it is going to be good i i think its going to be good. Its mustsee tv. It is mustsee tv. Jimmy its mustsee tv. Do you have any advice . Youre youre a former cast member. Jimmy its just so it goes by so fast, dude. Theres no advice. Yeah, yeah, its a a whirlwind, yeah. Jimmy theyre all pros up there. Theyre the best. Yeah. Jimmy the writers, the cast are great. Theyre the best. I mean, the crew is yeah, theyre great. Jimmy everybody is great. Everybodys really nice. Jimmy so just trust everybody. And have fun and just know that it goes by fast and youll miss it, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Jimmy its just have you ever done, like, improv or comedy or on stage . A little bit. Yeah, i was in an improv troop in high school with margaret cho and aisha tyler called batwing lubricant. I dont know what we came up with that name. [ laughter ] jimmy oh, of course. And jimmy yes, of course. [ laughter ] as you know, batwing lubricant jimmy please sit please sit down everyone. Yeah. Jimmy please sit down. [ laughter ] jimmy wait, but margaret cho . Margaret cho jimmy and aisha tyler. And aisha, yeah. Yeah. Im jimmy i think so. Maybe batwing helped. Yeah. Jimmy and it was batwing lubricant . Batwinf lubricant. Yeah. [ light laughter ] jimmy any idea where that came from . It seemed funny. I dont know how we came up with that name but we learned a a couple of the improv rules, you know. Jimmy and where did you perform . It was terrible. We were terrible. Jimmy you were . Cafeterias, you know, and its like, you know. Jimmy really . Yeah, awful. Awful. Jimmy you would tour cafeterias . Yes, yes. [ laughter ] i think we got one night we got to go to the other cafe, which was a big deal. You know, it was like a field trip. Jimmy oh, yeah. [ laughter ] yeah. Jimmy it was the same audience . Everyone moved from the cafeteria to the other cafe. Like [ laughter ] were in the other cafeteria. Yeah. And we had some adults. We adults in the audience. Jimmy you did, yeah. Yeah, it was very intimidating. Jimmy and you once got a i dont want to say cast, by george lucas. Yes, thats right. Jimmy this is big i did not know this, a lot of people might not know this about you. As a care bear. Yes. I got [ laughter ] i got paid 50 bucks to be at George Lucass 4yearold daughters birthday party. [ laughter ] and i was in a polyester you know, like in disneyland, like, care bear outfit. Jimmy wait, but i dont understand how does this come about. Were you in a in that si i was in a High School Performing arts and somebody got word that i was an actor. I was dressed as a a care bear. [ laughter ] jimmy wait. I was jimmy but did you freak out that it was george lucas . I was totally freaked out. I thought maybe id get a job out of it. I was i was sweating like roy moore at a church, you know, i was like [ laughter ] and, it was intense. Jimmy could you it was a hot it was hot in that costume. It was very hot. Very hot. Jimmy but did you maybe add a little robot move or something . [ laughter ] because its george lucas and youre like, well, c3po could be have a friendly buddy. [ laughter ] i dont know. Just saying, dude. Meepohmeepoh, yeah. Jimmy beebopbeebop, yeah. [ laughter ] and did he ever call you back after that. He never did. [ laughter ] i never got the darth vader call. Jimmy you never got the call. Yeah, yeah. Jimmy well, maybe youll get the call now that you won a a golden globe yeah, man [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thats what im talking about. More with golden globe winner sam rockwell when we come back, everybody. Stick around [ cheers and applause ] the world is not flat. You cant just pinch it, swipe it, or scroll it. Sure, youve seen the mediterranean. But have you . How warm is brazil in february . What color is dusk in San Francisco . Theres a whole world out there and no other card lets you experience it like the platinum card. Backed by the service and security of american express. When you filter out the bad. Youre left with. The good. In life. And in water. Choose the cleaner, better tasting world of brita. Choose the filtered life. 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Jimmy never can you, never go back. Thats it. Jimmy youve changed. Youre different, sam. You really have changed. I have completely changed. Jimmy i can tell a little bit. Im a dick. Jimmy its just that, youre a real jerk now. [ laughter ] jimmy lets talk about this movie three billboards yes. Jimmy outside of ebbing, missouri. Yes, yes. Jimmy man, oh, man. It is tricky business movie. This is everybodys fantastic martin mcdonagh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wrote and directed it. Jimmy francis mcdormand. Yeah. Jimmy is just hitting home runs every seen. Shes incredible. Woody harrelson, peter dinklage, john hawkes. Bunch a great people. Jimmy who plays your mom . Sandy martin. Who was in napoleon dynamite. And shes an old [ cheers and applause ] jimmy shes great, yeah. Shes great isnt she . Jimmy dude, you guys have a a great chemistry. Had you martin mcdouagh i heard that he kind of wrote the role for you. Yeah, yeah, he wrote this role. Im im so lucky. And it worked out. You know we had the jimmy how did you meet martin mcdonagh, hes amazing. Hes amazing. Jimmy really . Hes like, hes brilliant. He really is. He hes like a if harold pincher, sam sheppard, the coen brothers and david mamet made like a a frankenstein love baby, it would be martin mcdonagh. And quentin tarantino. [ laughter ] jimmy yeah. Yeah, yeah im so lucky to have done i did a play with him. Was maybe going to do yeah its just incredible. Jimmy oh, it was just it was just great. And can you set up the movie for those who havent seen it . Its about a woman whos avenging her daughters rape and murder and she takes on the town police force. And so it gets pretty hijinks ensue. [ laughter ] jimmy no. Thats not true thats not no, its a its a a dramatic film but it has some laughs to it. Jimmy definitely some laughs in there. She puts up these three billboards just basically calling out yeah, yeah. Jimmy police and the towns not happy with happy it. I mean, theres moments where you are funny. Theres moments when you are just mean. Yeah. Jimmy and stupid. Nasty. Jimmy and nasty. Theres moments when youre drunk, theres moments when youre its just like youre playing 10 roles in one role. I loved every one of the 10 roles. Congratulations. Thanks man. Jimmy hes so, so good. [ cheers and applause ] i want to show a clip. Heres sam rockwell in three billboards outside ebbin take a look at this. Hey, [ bleep ] head. What . Dont say, what dixon when she comes in calling you a a [ bleep ] head and dont you come in here shut up you get over here. No. You get over here. All right. What. Go, dixon. What . You do not allow a member of the public to you call a a [ bleep ] head in this station house. Thats what im doing. It taking care of it in my own way, actually. Now get out of my ass. Mrs. Hayes, have a seat. What is it that i can do for you today . Jimmy yeah [ cheers and applause ] what an awesome movie. Sam rockwell everybody three billboards outside ebbin is in theatres now. He is hosting saturday night live this weekend. Hes a golden globe winner. [ cheers and applause ] sam rockwell. Well be right back with tig notaro everybody. Stick around. [ cheers and applause ] every truck guy has their own way of conveying powerful. Yeeaaahhh boy. Kind of looks like a monster coming to eat ya. Holy smokes. That is awesome. Strong. You got the basic, and you got the beefy. Incredible. No way. Start your year off strong in a new chevy truck. Get a total value of over 9,600 on this silverado all star when you finance with gm financial. Find new roads at your local chevy dealer. With advils fast relief, youll ask, what pulled muscle . What headache . Nothing works faster to make pain a distant memory. Advil liquigels and advil liquigels minis. What pain . Whats cool is, today, we have 400 people working across the globe. 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It cleans better. Its four times stronger and you can use less. But when we brought our daughter home, that was it. Now i have nicoderm cq. The nicoderm cq patch with unique extended release Technology Helps prevent your urge to smoke all day. Its the best thing that ever happened to me. Every great why needs a great how. The guy who switched to sprint. Guess what . They Just Announced that their unlimited plan now comes with hulu. I get unlimited access to hulu originals, thousands of hit shows, movies, next day tv, its crazy i get hulu included in my unlimited plan and streaming in hd. I can watch at home, at work, even when im just taking a break. Thats tv that works for me. vo unlimited now with hulu. 4 lines for 25 per month and the 5th line free. For people with hearing loss, thats 50 off verizon, at t, and tmobile. Visit sprintrelay. Com. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy our next guest very funny, very talented comedian. You can see here in the Second Season of her critically acclaimed series one mississippi. Which is available on amazon prime video. Please welcome tig notaro, ladies and gentlemen. Tig, tig welcome back to the show. Jimmy. Jimmy oh my goodness. Oh boy. Thank you already. Wow. No, no, no, no, no, no. That that is for me. [ light laughter ] jimmy okay. [ light laughter ] its nice to see you. It is nice to see you. Heres the thing. I talked to Ellen Degeneres last night. Jimmy umhuh. [cheers and applause]. That was a bigger applause than i got but [ light laughter ] thats fine but i talked to her last night and she asked if i was in new york and i said i was doing the tonight show and she said she wasnt comfortable with me doing other talk shows. And i said, you know, i still love you. And she said well id appreciate it if you would do something to let me know youre thinking about me while youre on the tonight show. And she asked if i would eat some banana cream pie. And and do a jumping jack. So do you mind if i do that . [cheers and applause]. Jimmy i dont mind if you do a jumping jack. [ cheers and applause ] i love ellen too though. So, i want to show ellen that i love ellen too. [cheers and applause] try it. Jimmy ellen ellen. Ellen. Jimmy i love you. Ellen. He loves you more than i love you. Jimmy there you go. Thats his jimmy there we go. No, no, its clear. Jimmy just so we know where the love is coming from. [ light laughter ] i love you, ellen. I i i care deeply for u, i am not willing to do this though. Jimmy i sadly am. I really am. You didnt even have jimmy welcome. You didnt even really have to jump to that point. Jimmy i didnt. I didnt. I just im very hungry. Got, like, a little snack. Little midnight snack. Heres my concern. Is theres been a terrible jimmy thank you very much. A terrible illness thats swept through my house. So i oh, god. [ laughter ] jimmy what are you talking about . My theres some my whole family got sick. And one jimmy oh no. One person in the family got sicker than everybody. I cant say who it was. Jimmy dont, yeah, dont. Yeah, im i want to respect her privacy. She said i could talk about this but, just not say who she was. But she got sick, you know, both ends sick. Jimmy oh yay dont say dont say who. She wanted me to tell the story but just dont dont mention who she is. Jimmy i got ya. But it was it was rough. Jimmy it was bad news. It wary like, when i first walked in. She was sitting, you know, on the toilet and i went and got her a bucket to put on her lap. And jimmy wow. And you know it was that moment of just when i saw that she looked at me like hmm hmm. [ light laughter ] and we didnt know there was 12 hours ahead of us of that situation. Jimmy oh my goodness. Yes. And and as the hours went on it really was no longer that, like, how about this. It i was like are you okay . And then her response it was it was delayed and very deep guttural like, no. [ laughter ] and it was jimmy you have a to make a a decision, there you well, do you need to go to the hospital . I dont know. [ laughter ] again i dont want to say jimmy say who this person is, no. No we dont want too. No names. [ light laughter ] and then she 12 hours later was finally okay. And she said, its crazy because i actually feel like that brought us closer together. And i said, you know [ laughter ] i actually feel the exact opposite. [ laughter ] i jimmy im going to other way a little bit. Yeah. Jimmy im going the other way a little bit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was ellen. [ laughter ] shes not vegan. Jimmy thats not for her. Thats what that was. Jimmy exactly, i want to talk one mississippi. Jimmy season two amazon prime video. Very funny. Critically acclaimed. I will tell you that its 100 on rotten tomatoes, which is really rare. So, congratulations on that. [ cheers and applause ] but im watching i watch the show. And its very funny. But also deals with some important issues as well. And good for you. Well done. Thank you. Jimmy do you want to let everybody know what the show is about this season. Love. Jimmy yeah. Thats a big issue. Well, theres love and then jimmy it is love. But also we the Second Season deals a lot with sexual assaults and harassment. And we actually wrote the show a year ago before all of this was coming out in the news. Jimmy isnt that bizarre. And the effect, not that we caused all this. But whats going on right now in the news. Its everything and beyond what we hoped would happen. Needs to happen and the conversation needs to continue. But it is when we were making this show a year ago, no part of us thought there was going to be this sort of progress this quickly. And its really its its un jimmy bizarre. Its unbelievable. Jimmy good for you. It think its fantastic that youre doing that. Thank you. Jimmy i want to see youll love it. Its done in such a smart way. And is is there going to be a third season . Are you working on the third season . Oh jimmy i hope theres a a third season. Jimmy are you gonna do one . We havent heard anything. We havent heard anything. Jimmy is that the way those shows work . I i jimmy no, they have too. You have to do it, youre dude, youre just, just getting started. I i i want too. Jimmy youre in a good zone right now. I want to do it. Jimmy dont stop. We need like 10 more seasons. Please, tig. 10 more seasons. 10 more seasons. Jimmy ten mississippi. Yeah. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy change the title to ten mississippi. Eleven mississippi. Jimmy eleven mississippi. Thats thinking. Cmon. Jimmy thats thinking, too much, right . Yeah. I want to show a clip of tig notaro in one mississippi. Take a look at this. I just love that little t its so cute our kids believe in dinosaurs, isnt it . What do you mean by believe . You know, how they think they are real and everything . Do you not think they existed . Well, ive never seen one have you. No but i have seen their bones in the museum. Oh, please just because some body digs up something that looks like a bone and some scientist plugs it into a a computer and calls it whatever. Doesnt make it true. Ive seen a documentary called Jurassic Park and its kind of hard to argue with that. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy i love that documentary. Its good. Jimmy i love the documentary Jurassic Park. Tig notaro everybody. Watch season two of one mississippi on amazon prime video. Well be right back with music from alan walker featuring noah cyrus, stick around everybody. [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy he is a talented norwegian producer and d. J. Who has racked up over 8 billion streams. Huh . Yeah. [ cheers and applause ] worldwide, he will play coachella this april. Performing all falls down featuring noah cyrus, please welcome alan walker. [ cheers and applause ] whats the trick i wish i knew im so done with thinking through all the things i could have been and i know you want me too all it takes is that one look you do and i run right back to you you crossed a line and its time to say eff you whats the point in saying that when you know how ill react you think you can just take it back but it just dont work like that youre the drug that im addicted to and i want you so bad guess im stuck with you and thats that cause when it all falls down then whatever when it dont work out for the better and if we just aint right and its time to say goodbye when it all falls down when it all falls down ill be fine ill be fine youre the drug that im addicted to and i want you so bad but ill be fine why we fight i dont know we say what hurts the most oh i tried staying cold but you take it personal with all those firing shots and making grounds its way too hard to cope but i still i cant let you go cause when it all fall down then whatever when it dont work out for the better and if it we just aint right and its time to say goodbye when it all falls down when it all falls down ill be fine ill be fine youre the drug that im addicted to and i want you so bad but ill be fine ill be fine fine when it all falls down falling down all falls down all falls down all falls down cause when it all falls down then whatever then whatever baby and when it dont work out for the better for the better and if we just aint right and its time to say goodbye when it all falls down when it all falls down ill be fine fine fine fine ill be fine ill be fine youre the drug that im addicted to and i want you so bad ill be fine ill be fine and thats that [ cheers and applause ] jimmy oh my thank you, thank you, thank you. Alan walker noah cyrus [ cheers and applause ] all falls down is out now my thanks to the sam rockwell, tig notaro, gal gadot, Patty Jenkins, alan walker, noah cyrus and the roots right there from philadelphia, pennsylvania. [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for late night with seth meyers. Thanks for watching. Have a great night. I hope to see you tomorrow. Thanks a lot. [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] announcer from 30 Rockefeller Plaza in new york, its late night with seth meyers. Tonight jake tapper. Creators of corporate, comedians Matt Ingebretson and jake weisman. Featuring the 8g band with allison miller. [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers. Seth good evening, im seth meyers, this is late night. How is everybody doing tonight . [ cheers and applause ] that is fantastic to hear. In that case, lets get to the news. During an immigration discussion today, President Trump reportedly asked lawmakers, quote, why are we having all of these people from [ bleep ]hole countries come here

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