Dear Care and Feeding,
I am finding myself unable to let go of the past—when my first child, my daughter, was born. My mother-in-law came to help us during my delivery and recovery. I liked her and treated her like my own mother. But she owned the baby too much, and would not let the baby be in my arms. Every time I picked up my baby to hold her and love her, she would ask immediately if she could take her. I was unable to say no, and this kept repeating. My baby would be with me only while I fed her. After delivery I was physical and mentally very delicate and also experienced postpartum depression. Since my parents lived in a different country, I had no other option. I had to be nice to my mother-in-law. I didn’t talk about it to my husband either, fearing that he would take it in a wrong way. All this is long over now, and my daughter is 13. But these negative thoughts keep bothering me every now and then. How can I get rid of these thoughts?