You ever write on a long email on one of these or take a picture on one of these . I have not done that, no. No. Uh uh. So until someone makes a phone that can do both really well. Am i sensing sarcasm here . Do more with the galaxy s iii and note ii. Now at safe technology. Advil pm® or tylenol pm. The advil pm® guy is spending less time lying awake with annoying aches and pains and more time asleep. Advil pm®. The difference is a better nights sleep. cheers and applause dave thank you so much. By the way, during that commercial break a team of highly skilled specialists from nasa and j. P. L. Came in here laughter and dismantled the vibrating desk because you cant have this thing around too long. It sends off magnetic force fields that may be harmful to you, the viewer. Ive got a lead apron on, im fine. Paul i can see it from here applause dave thank you. Paul looks good. Dave and by the way, there will be a vibrating desk on each and every boeing 787 dream liner. Dave that is beautiful. Dave our next guest couldnt be happier this man is here, what a lovely individual, hes a twotime Emmy Award Winner and youll soon be able to see him starring on broadway, i think seeing him on leave theater stage will be a lovely experience with one and all, its a play entitled orphans and performances will begin march 26 at the schoenfeld theater right here in new york city. Ladies and gentlemen, the one, the only alec baldwin. Alec . cheers and applause thank you, alec, great pleasure to have you here again. Thank you so much. Let me just take a second. You were so kind and it meant such a great deal to me that you participated in the celebration of the Kennedy Center honors back in december and you were part of my segment and it meant so much to me that a friend and man of your stature would be part of that and i cant thank you enough. But he won the Kennedy Center honors. Dave but you and tina fey. And ray roman nope and jimmy. Dave jimmy kimmel. You made my family feel good about me and ive never been able to do that. laughter how are you doing, my friend is . Im doing really, really well. How much did you pay for that vibrating sdmefk dave i cant tell you. Its all part of a government contract. Its really your tax dollars at work. applause you look great, by the way. I do, thank you. Dave you getting a little gray going . I am. Well, when w 30 rock i would color my hair because on that show i thought the guy was the kind of guy who would color his hair. So i stopped coloring my hair when the show was over and your hair grows out and you have colored hair on the top, dyed hair, then off band, sort of rings of sat turn going around your head. laughter people have commented on this, they say whats that dead animal on top of his head . Dave no, no. They have very unkind. Dave i couldnt help but notice in some newspapers a newspaper that you im telling you something. I wouldnt give your troubles to a monkey on a rock. laughter what is happening . Dave, i would like to begin now an official campaign to get the New York Post nominated for Pulitzer Prize for journalism. laughter when you think about it, its stalwart of them. All the 25 years that i was work on Voter Registration down in florida and up in massachusetts and maine and Legal Defense of that and working with the Kennedy Center for human rights in africa and all these Different Things but the post waited and waited and waited patiently for 25 years and finally they tripped me up and exposed me for the racist that i really am. laughter im a racist. 25 years of the work ive done. Dave a couple things come to mind here. laughter first of all, it seems to me that youre the kind of a guy, youre in this situation now, you and your lovely wife are expecting a child. Yeah. Dave congratulations. The alaria. Are they just laying in wait for you . Is that what happens . I seem to have become somebody who thats what theyre maybe their readership wants. I really cant explain it over than theres somebody they think that theyre going to score some points on and so forth. Dave it will sell newspapers. They put you on the cover and think think it must affect their circulation. I think the good news is well, their circulation is down quite a bit, it has been for a last couple years but the good news for me is when Something Like that happens which is very ugly and unpleasant, that 99 of the penal see that and say thats not possible. Dave they know you well enough and youve worked hard enough. The multitude of things ive done, they know its not possible and theres 1 who youre never going to capture them, youre never going to win them over. I would tell people all the time if george bushs mother fell through the ice on a pond in kennebunkport and i went out on the ice and saved bushs mother from drowning during an ice skating accident laughter dave i heard she was ice fishing. She was ice fishing. Youre right. I got that wrong. Lets put finer touches on this. She was ice fishing and i went out on the fragile ice and i got bushs mother out the first thing the post would say is look at the way he twisted her arm he man handled her dave im one of the 99 , i looked at the coverage and thought this is not alec baldwin. Something here has been fabricated. This is not a guy i know. What part of it was fabricated because its got to be you were there on the sidewalk. We know that for a fact. What people dont know is that people have cameras and what will happen is a couple days later they go back to their other home which is far away a telephoto lens to get the picture they want. They dont need to be that approximate to you. But in order to have the event they want where they have a camera and a guy thats on you and another guy filming that to get any possible altercation. The guy has the camera youve seen this before and theyre like this in your face with the camera really, really close and theyre kind of dave to aggravate you. They want you to say in some using some old anglosaxon term laughter id appreciate if you didnt do that. laughter which is what inaudible means. It means id appreciate it if you didnt do that. applause but my wife is pregnant. Dave we know you to be a very literal, very verbal, very worldly man so i can understand that you would say things purposefully insulting to those involved in the i am capable of saying this things that are purposefully provoking and insulting. Dave but you would not invoke racist terms. And the other thing is the guy has a camera and all these guys have those cameras that have dual they have a still camera and a videographer element. They can videotape you and they record it tuul a theyre dying to get you doing something on film or saying something and sure enough people some of them, much to my surprise, the source was played all the tapes and there was no evidence saying that was that it was racial and i thought it was interesting they assigned a word to me that i havent heard since rod steiger was in idea in the heat of the night. laughter this is a word that is like thats usually confined to a certain part of the south in the early 60s. So im sitting there going wow, youre going to put a word in my mouth ill give you another word. It was really dave not just your word against somebody elses. We have objective verifications that this never happened . As far as im concerned. They played this stuff and they want to get you. Dave when we come back, alec baldwin will still be here. What do you think of that . cheers and applause my heart is crying crying lonely teardrops applause dave alec baldwin, ladies and gentlemen. And what is it like now . You have a daughter who is 17 years old and a yet to be born newborn, we dont know boy or girl yet. Dont know. Dave dont know. Anticipation the same this time around as it was for your first daughter . No, its very different. Dave hows your wife holding up . My wife is good. But being around a woman when shes pregnant and im older now quite a bit older, actually. And to be around her its really its amazing how you experience that. Like my wife, the pregnant woman, the hormonallycharged woman, if you will, its just thrilling. laughter applause lets say sex. If youre a husband and you want to be a good husband and im trying to be a good husband and future father you save your best for your wife and she knows that. So for example my wife is on the phone with her hairdresser and shes like really . Okay, i cant wait to see you, thats going to be great . What time, 12 00 . My wife is from spain. laughter i dont mean to be racist when i put that accent on. applause she says i cannot wait to see you, 12 oclock. Turns to me and goes i dont feel good and she saves her most vulnerable needy self for you because she feels safe in this relationship. The other thing is this chasm between whats normal a pregnant woman is constantly monitoring themselves every 15 seconds to my wife will be announcing and shell be like i have to pee every five minutes i cant believe it then im like, well, we have four bathrooms in the apartment so youre covered. We have a bathroom in every quadrant at the ready, clean and freshly painted. Then the next day shes like i dont have to pee at all today im like im getting whiplash pee; no pee. Its either a pee or a no pee day. Dave yeah. Its an amazing laughter applause from the moment of conception the switches that are thrown to the support this process is endless. And my wife is very fit. Shes a Yoga Instructor and shes been super fit her whole life and nutritionally very conscious. One of the most conscious people and then ill see her and ill you know, you want to eat smart and keep up your nutritional values, you have to eat, youre having baby and ill say do you want know get you some pineapple shell say i dont know. Ill go do you want honey dew melon or cantaloupe. I go to the store, honey dew, pineapple. I bring the melon home, theres a contain over pine a that will will probably serve four people. I put it on the counter and go if you want pineapple, here it is. I go to the other room, i charge my phone, plug my phone into charge it, turn around, walk back, three quarters of the pineapple is gone. laughter shes like i was very hungry. laughter dave we shouldnt be and when i say we i mean you shouldnt be on a t. V. Show making fun of your wife for gods sake. But thats the way it goes. The crazy thrill a minute ride. Dave laughs yes, it is. Im pulling your copy of something called eye rhymes. Tell us about this and your involvement. Dave would you like know do that . I wish somebody could do it. applause dave there you go, thank you alan. This is illustrated by sarah fergus and i did the recording of this, the recorded book with blithe danner and my friend john dequavis wrote this book and its a Theodore Geisel and Norton Juster and all those wonderful word games to teach kids pronunciations of words of meanings and usages of words so youll have words that are spelled the same dave the ambiguity of the language so you can see the flying dove is on the move, his ardent love he seeks to prove. The words are spelled the same but theyre not homonyms. My friend john is here. Dave is he in the audience . If hes made it this far, god bless him. applause dave now he wrote this book eye rhymes and theres clever, clever usages of learning words but when i was done i said to myself god i think john smoked a lot of pot when he was younger. laughter dave well that will be good for the kids. applause tell me about orphans back on the great stage. Hows it going . Its going well, were doing a play thats got almost a fairy tale quality about it. It was done this was the play if im not mistake than helped bring stepen wol of the broadway when they had their real great hay day in chicago in the early 80s. I have think it was stepen wolf that was done on broadway that sinise directed and Kevin Anderson was in it as well with a bunch of people, john mahoney. And the play is about two boys who live who are homeless who live in an abandoned house in philadelphia. One of them is very thuggish and tough and he kidnaps an older man and brings him to the house and finds out hes one of the biggest gangsters from chicago. I decide to stay at the house and make a home with them and i have a particular reason. I kind of adopt them. Dave oh, my goodness. laughs very strange play. Dave it opens in march so thats just around the corner. And i dont know, can you still get tickets . Can you not get tickets . Oh they got plenty of tickets. laughter dave well, god bless you and your wife, im looking forward to the announcement of your newborn and glad Everything Else is doing all right. laughter im hanging in there. Dave if you need a place to stay. laughter alec baldwin, ladies and gentlemen. Well be right back with emily lieu harris. Til dance do we part the solos are complete. You are the pig to her blanket. Thats not breakdancing, thats breakup dancing. Dont give up on us america, were not done yet now two must dance as one. You wont run into the top ten appliance brands just anywhere. Only sears carries them all. And only sears delivers them all with 70 in shop your way points. This is sears. In the middle of the night it can be frustrating. Its hard to turn off and go back to sleep. Intermezzo is the first and only prescription sleep aid approved for use as needed in the middle of the night when you cant get back to sleep. Its an effective sleep medicine you dont take before bedtime. 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Intermezzo, like most sleep medicines, has some risk of dependency. Common side effects are headache, nausea, and fatigue. So if you suffer from middleofthenight insomnia, ask your doctor about intermezzo and return to sleep again. This is amazing, how did you find us . I thought we might be related, so i had a fiber analysis done and sure enough, were family. But youre not even shredded. Youre. Crunchy . that happens sometimes. And you help keep people full with whole grain fiber . Just like you guys. [ female announcer ] theyre different, but the same. New frosted miniwheats crunch. A tasty square packed with a crunch. [ crunch ]. Of whole grain fiber that helps keep you full. Its a big breakfast. [ crunch ]. In new a little biscuit. Smile ohhh bring it in ooohhhooh theres nothing like our grilled lobster and lobster tacos. The bar harbor bake is really worth trying. [ male announcer ] get more during red lobsters lobsterfest. 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Dave i have another question. Maybe im seeing things. And, by god, i may be. laughter theres no reason Cardinal Dolan would be here, is there . From the new york the archbishop of new york. Timothy dolan . Paul i dont know why he would be here. I think hes heading for rome soon. Dave what . Paul hes on his way to rome i think, isnt he . Dave he doesnt call me when he travels cardinal done lan, why was he here . He was here . He is here . Oh, there he is. Ladies and gentlemen, look at that cheers and applause dave did you ever see anything weirder than that . Paul laughs dave Cardinal Dolan, he wants to be pope. So hes throwing out tshirts. Paul kind of a half time show thing. Dave its crazy, isnt it . I tell you, those catholics always got something going on. laughter when we come back, the lovely Emmylou Harris and rodney crowell, everyone. applause captioning sponsored by worldwide pants and cbs captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org applause dave yes, sir, thank you, paul. Our next guests this is wonderful. Two extraordinary multiple grammy Award Winning singer song writers and they have collaborated on a wonderful new c. D. I think we have a shot of it here. Its entitled old yellow moon. Please welcome back to the program Emmylou Harris and rodney crowell. Kids . applause i hope that i wont be that wrong anymore and maybe ive learned this time i hope that i find what im reaching for the way that it is in my mind someday ill get over you ill live to see it all through but ill always miss dreaming my dreams with you