Would you say no to a lot more money . [excited scream] you just won a Million Dollars no thanks. Nice balloons, though ing you an extra weeks vacation oh, ah. Nooo. What . No way. Who says no to more . Time warner cables all about giving you more. Like the most free hd channels and virtually unlimited movies and shows on demand, so you can binge all day. Call now. And dont forget the free tv app. Get ultrafast internet with secure home wifi to connect all your devices. Saving on mobile data fees, helps big time. Switch to time warner cable. Free hd channels, 100 meg internet and unlimited calling to half the world. We can call aunt rose as much as we want now. Switching is easy. Get our exclusive 1hour arrival window, a moneyback guarantee with no contract to sign. Plus get free installation, tv equiment and epix included. Really . Honest. No. Stop worrying. [ gavel banging ] unhunh. Start. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, i intend to prove that the defendant, whoever he is, has used the honored name of Benjamin Franklin as part of an advertising campaign, now, unfortunately, theres no law against tasteless advertising. But in the process of his activities, the defendant made a mistake. He stole a valuable public monument a rare old fire engine that was on display in front of fire station number three. Now, such a crime is more serious than ordinary theft, because the man who steals public property steals not only from one man, but from everyone. Oh, an excellent point, an excellent point. Its your turn, mr. Franklin. Franklin ladies and gentlemen of the jury, human reason is a very uncertain thing. Consequently, i think that a good, sure instinct is worth a great deal more. Now, the District Attorney, i fear, that i stole a fire engine. Now, what motive could a man have for stealing a fire engine . And, second, the District Attorney must prove that i am not Benjamin Franklin, but, in fact, an impostor. If he succeeds, i shall have to conclude that not only have i been mistaken as to my identity all these many years, but that my honored father and mother were somewhat confused at my birth. You are the head librarian of the Public Library . Thats right. And is that the man who walked into your library a few days ago . Yes, thats him, Benjamin Franklin. Just yes or no will do. What happened when he approached you . Well, of course, there was quite a disturbance. I mean, everyone started whispering. And you cant have that sort of thing in a library. I mean, there are signs all over uh, what else did he do . He wanted to pay a library fine on a book that was 200 years overdue. He wanted to pay a library fine on a book that was overdue for 200 years. Not exactly. You see, he didnt actually have the book. But he said that he had neglected to return it, and it had been on his conscience for 200 years. Your witness, sir. No questions, your honor. Youve made my point. [ crowd murmuring ] i call Darrin Stephens to the stand. If only he were ready to rest his. And have you ever discussed the idea of using Benjamin Franklin as part of an advertising approach to the Franklin Electronics account . I never brought it up. Uh, yes. Who . My boss. Mr. Stephens, i just have one more question. Who is that man sitting at that table . Remember, youre under oath. To the best of my knowledge, Benjamin Franklin. Does he really believe that . You know something even crazier . Im beginning to believe it. And when mrs. Stephens introduced me, she said they were going to a costume party. But i knew that wasnt true. You see, shes a you, uh, didnt believe her . Oh, of course not. I knew how he had gotten there. They cast did mr. Tate, mr. Stephens boss, join you then . But i wanted to tell you what did he say . He said, um, good night, uh, ben. Thank you, mrs. Kravitz. Thatll be all. But dont i get to tell you what i know about her . Only if someone asks you. Your witness, mr. Franklin. Mr. Franklin, you cant crossexamine her. But i must. Her testimonys very damaging. Itll be a lot more damaging if she gets a chance to go on. No questions, your honor. Thatll be all, madam. You may step down. The prosecution rests, your honor. This court will recess for 15 minutes. Time to start worrying again, right . Right. It was going fine until i got on the stand. Im afraid, with mr. Stephens testimony and that of the kravitz woman, the District Attorney has established a plausible motive for someone taking a vintage fire engine. Vintage fire engine. Vintage ill be right back. [ ding ] [ ding ] [ ding ] would you tell the jury, mrs. Stephens, where you got the plaque you hold in your hand . From the fire engine at station number three. Would you read the inscription, please . Benjamin franklin memorial fire engine. Your honor, id like to enter this plaque as exhibit a. Your honor, may i ask a question . If its relevant. How can the District Attorney accuse mr. Franklin of stealing his own property . He hasnt proved he is Benjamin Franklin. And you, sir, have not proved that i am not. [ gavel banging ] i will admonish this gallery only once. Another outburst like that, and ill have this courtroom cleared. Do you believe the defendant is Benjamin Franklin . Yes. How can you be so sure . All you have to do is look at him and listen to him talk. Thats no answer. How do you know . Well, if he isnt, why would he have tried to pay for a book that was 200 years overdue . Mrs. Stephens, do you know the penalty for perjury . Oh, hush up. Your hon [ tinkles ] now, i dont see that it makes any difference whether hes Benjamin Franklin or not. He represents mr. Franklin, doesnt he . Now, the District Attorney accuses him of creating a disturbance in the library. But he doesnt mention the fact that he was honest enough to pay a 200yearold fine or that Benjamin Franklin created the first Public Library. He also accuses him but he doesnt mention the fact that Benjamin Franklin started the first volunteer fire department. Arent you going to object to this, counselor . Doesnt look that way, your honor. Now, it seems to me that, whoever he is, all this gentleman has done since hes been here is to remind us of the wonderful things that Benjamin Franklin has done. And of the heritage of wisdom that he left us. Id want to thank him instead of trying to send him to jail. [ applause ] [ tinkles ] objection i think youre a little late, counselor. Congratulations, mr. Franklin. I knew you could do it. Congratulations, mr. Franklin. That was a great speech, sam oh, thank you, larry. This jury has found you not guilty a judgment in which the court concurs. You are free to go, but i would like to ask you one question. Do you intend to continue being Benjamin Franklin . Your honor. I believe that a mans wisdom, if he have any, should be left to future generations to measure against their own circumstances. If a man lives beyond his time and attempts to impose old notions upon new generations, he puts himself in very grave danger of losing any claim to wisdom at all. Therefore, your honor, although i shall continue to be Benjamin Franklin, for i can do no other, i shall no longer be that untimely gentleman in your gracious company. Good day, sir. Aunt clara, i dont think this is such a good idea. Mr. Franklin, you said yourself it was time to go back. And so i shall, sir, after this dear lady and i have a night, as you put it, on the town. But didnt you once say, early to bed, early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise . Yes, i did, i did. But that was before the electric light. Dont you think that your escort should be more appropriately dressed . Ill get one of darrins suits. No, no, no, no. I can do it. Is this a button loose on your coat, mr. Franklin . Oh, i hadnt noticed. Morning glorious. Correct appel apparel, sartor. Sartorius oh oh, i goofed again. Oh, no no, aunt clara, you look beautiful madam, you are a vision of loveliness. Oh, i congratulate you all for living in this marvelous 20th century, where such things are possible. Oh, let us go on, madam. [ chuckling ] well, uh, dont wait up, children. Good night. Oh oh, im sure theyll be all right, sweetheart. Captions by vitac [ crash ] forced landing. My goodness oh, good heavens, aunt clara. Are you all right . Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. My goodness. Oh, well. Oh. My, im glad you dropped in. Darrins in boston on business. Hows tabitha . Wonderful, just wonderful. Were going to the park as soon as i finish measuring the gazebo. You want to come to the park with tabitha and me . Id love to. And then afterwards, would you mind babysitting for a while, while i go to the bank . You see, i have been delegated by darrin during his absence to negotiate a loan. How about that . Oh, im very impressed. What does it mean . So we can tear down the gazebo and put up a rumpus room. Oh, well, i wish id known. Known what . If id known you were going to tear this thing down, i would have tried to land right dead center. [ both laugh ] oh, my goodness. Oh, yes. Samantha this is where we usually sit. Oh, its a lovely spot. Lovely. Uh, good morning. Oh, isnt that cute . No, tabitha. That doesnt belong to you. No. Come, dear, while mother gets a drink of water. Shes got enough toys now to open a toy store. Yes. [ tinkles ] tabitha, i said no. And you must not take what doesnt belong to you. Thats very wrong. Yes, thats very wrong. Fuzzy toy. What happened to well, of all the nerve well, im terribly sorry cant you get her one of her own . Here, love. Here you are. Please, uh. [ tinkles ] accident, eh . Some accident, you, you. You toy snatcher, you oh, im mr. Scranton. You wish to see me about applying for a loan . Ally, my husband is applying for the loan. But a business matter came up, and it made it impossible for him to keep the appointment, so i volunteered to come down and give you any information you might need. Come in, please. Sit down. Excuse me, sir. Yes, hawkins . The appraisal on the nelson house i have completed it. [ chuckles nervously ] to put it, uh, simply and kindly, nelsons Credit Rating shall we say that the nelsons character references fell short of the mark . They did . But they seemed so solid. Have you ever applied for a loan with us before . No, sir. But we use your calendars. What is the purpose of the loan . Home alterations. My husband wants to tear down our gazebo and build a rumpus room. I see. Whats a gazebo . Permit me, sir. A gazebo is a quaint word, fast going out of style, that some people, few though they may be, use when they refer to a summer house. Most of them are very small the summer houses, i mean. Well, if its a summer house, why dont you call it a summer house . Oh, i will. I will. Well, uh, where is your husband employed, mrs. Stephens . Advertising agency mcmann tate. Mcmann tate . Mcmann tate of their biggest accounts why didnt you say so . Welcome aboard how much do you want . Thank you. Uh, who is your brother . Well, tom scranton, president of super soapy soap. Super soapy soap . Why, thats one of the firms largest accounts is that so . Well super soapy soap the soap your skin loves to sud say, wasnt it your husbands firm gan . My husband wrote it. [ laughing ] well what a small world this is. I know your husbands boss. Larry tate, right . Right larry tate. Good old larry tate. Well well, we can move this loan right along. Therell just be this little application for you to fill in, a mere formality, i assure you. If my brother can trust your husbands firm with a milliondollar account, i guess we can risk a few bob on him hawkins, i want you to go out this afternoon and inspect mrs. Stephens property. Just a formality. Yes, sir. A loan to tear down a summer house a gazebo, hawkins. A gazebo. A gazebo. Oh, aunt clara, everything just went beautifully at the bank. What on earth are you doing . Oh, its so long since ive been an elephant, really. Why are you trying to be one now . Uh, uh, tabitha wants that toy elephant that she saw in the park. Rememremember . Hmm. Well, why dont we try this . Its one of her favorites. I did. Ive tried every toy in the house. Ive tried everything. Excuse me. Ooh. Theres one thing i havent tried. Hello . Oh, hi, darrin. Im so glad you called. Guess what. Theyre gonna give us the loan. Theyre practically gonna give us the bank in the park, all pink and new, polka dots of every hue, hear this wish, hear this chant, tabitha wants an elephant. Oh, dear [ gasping ] oh, i will, dear. Ill see that everything is shipshape when the appraiser comes. Oh, now, darrin, sweetheart. Dont worry. I promise you, everything will be in perfect order. [ elephant trumpets ] [ gasps ] oh, my stars aunt clara, what have you done . Well, i [ stammering ] gget rid of this elephant. Oh, iii cant. Id love to oblige, dear, but unfortunately i cant. Well, aunt clara, you cast the spell. Just uncast it. Yes, but i cant without the toy from the park. Oh, we have to have that toy. I hope the womans still there. Ill go see. Oh, yes. And ill stay with tabitha. And, uh, in the meantime, ill work on it. Yes, fine. All right. Oh. Oh, no. No, if i leave you here and you work on it, im apt to have an entire zoo before i get back. Now, come over this way. Come on. Come on. [ stammering ] [ trumpets ] [ trumpeting continues ] colors pink and blue and gray, why dont you just all go away . I was afraid that was. No good. I have it oh, i have the perfect solution. What . Oh, uh, call the exterminator. Oh, aunt clara. [ telephone rings ] hello . Hello, sam. Larry. Oh, hi, larry. How are you . Is i just had a funny call from leon scranton. Leon scranton, the Bank President . Yeah, and the reason he called me was he just had a funny call from the appraiser. The appraiser . Yeah. Are you ready for this . The appraiser told scranton that you have an elephant in your living room [ laughing ] he did . Why would he say a thing like that . Now, wait, wait, wait, wait. Theres more. There is . He also said that the elephant was pink with multicolored polka dots wwell, thats, uh, thats crazy. Isnt it . Of course, but dont worry. I took care of everything. You did . How . Listen, sam, scrantons a bit of an oddball. It seems to run in the family. So, if its all right with you, ill bring leon to your house at 4 00 so that he can see the whole thing is utter nonsense. Well, uh, frankly, larry because we dont want leon telling his brother in his living room in living color. Do we . No. No, we certainly dont. Okay. Well, ill see you at 4 00. Aaall right, larry. See you at 4 00. Bye. Aunt clara, larry is bringing the Bank President by at 4 00. Why . To prove that we do not have an elephant in our living room. Now, we have to get rid of that elephant. Or else heave ho heave ugh heave ho. Oh, aunt clara, dont stop now. We have to get it outside. If we do, theres a chance mr. Scranton wont see it. Try to get him out to the patio . Aunt clara, if i could. Him out to the patio, i would. Him back to africa. Now, come on. Now, mr. Scranton and tate, but not without a pink, polkadotted elephant. Whew well, we did it. [ sighs ] did what . Oh, sometimes, you know, i think youre very vague, dear. Well, now, all i have to do is put you to bed, change clothes, fix the refreshments, and oh, well, whats the rush . I have all of two minutes. Samantha [ trumpeting ] bad elephant. Oh, really, aunt clara, why did you let it back in . I couldnt help it, dear. He was coming crashing through the window there, the glass, and i didnt know if you had it insured. Aunt clara. Aunt clara, thats it wwwhats it . Oh, yes, well, i knew that from the start. Theyre crazy about each other. [ doorbell rings ] [ gasps ] oh, i wonder who that can be. Oh, i bet its mr. Scranton. Come on lets see if hell follow tabitha into the den. Come on. Oh, wwait a minute wait for me brace yourself, mr. Scranton. You are about to see ounded. You stay there and play quietly, huh . Now, im sure as long as theyre both here, that theyll stay put, and there wont be any problem. Now, um, aunt clara, i want you to go to the park and get that toy. I dont care how you do it. Oh, yes, i do. Absolutely no witchcraft. Oh, uh, no witchcraft. Yes, all right. Now, hurry. Yes, i will. Will you just give me a boost . Oh, certainly. [ ding ] whats keeping them . [ doorbell rings ] [ ding ] hi, larry, gentlemen. Good afternoon. Doesnt take you very long to change, does it . Well, that depends. Into what . Mrs. Stephens . Now, hold on, hawkins. Youre getting a little highhanded. No, no. Thats exactly what i had in mind. I have some nice cool drinks for all of us. You lead the way, larry. This way, gentlemen. Mr. Hawkins . You said it was on the patio. Come on. Show us where. All right. What did you do with it . Hes got to be here. I saw you push him out here. Push what where . The elephant. Maybe hes in the garage. Congratulations, madam. Congratulations . For what . Well, youve won todays grand prize for having the only toy elephant in the park. With, uh, polka dots on it. 20 for you, dear. [ chuckles ] wait a minute oh, no, i cant. I cant, dear. The contest will be over at 6 00. [ chuckles nervously ] yes. What is it with that elephant . It wasnt in the garage, but hes here someplace, and ill find him. Leon, how far do you want to go . I dont care. I smell a rat. If hes not out here, then hes somewhere in the house. Mr. Hawkins, really. Mr. Hawkins, i must protest, please. Where have you got him . What . Mmhmm, mmhmm. I know. Youve got him hidden. In a closet. Thats what it is in a closet. An elephant in a closet . Now, are you satisfied . Now im satisfied. Hant. Thats not an elephant. I found it, mr. Scranton i found the elephant, and hes every bit as pink and polkadotted as i said he was. All right, hawkins. Where . In the last place youd expect, sir in the den. Follow me, please. Leon, where did you find this joker . See for yourselves. [ groans ] he was here. He was. I saw him. Why would i say that i saw him if i hadnt . That is a question for you to ask a qualified psychiatrist. I couldnt agree more. Enough is enough. We havent looked everywhere. The kitchen. We havent we havent tried the kitchen. At least lets try the kitchen. You try the kitchen, and if you find the elephant, let me know. Ill come arunning. So will i. Aha there you are all right. Im letting you know. You may both come arunning. The elephant is in the kitchen and the king is in the counting house. Counting out his money. You dont have to come in, but come a little closer. Now what do you say . Aah i think youve been overworking him. Oh, please, mr. Scranton. Anyone can make a mistake. All he needs is a vacation. Well, ill think it over. Right now, ive seen enough. Im sorry to have bothered you, mrs. Stephens. Oh, no bother. Ill call you, sam. Coming, hawkins . Um, iill give him something for his headache, and then hell go. Hmm. Mommy mommy bitha. I thought i told you to stay in the den. [ trumpeting ] thats. Thats not an elephant. Oh oh, i hope im not too late. Oh, no, of course not, dear. Thank heaven shes here. All right. Now, aunt clara, you give me the elephant, and ill return it from here. No, allow me, please. Well, of course you do, dear, but, uh, be careful. Yes. Have no fear. Uh, no fear. Polka dots and trunks that bend, bring to us a happy end. Oh, look oh, aunt clara [ elephant trumpets ] aah oh, shall we make a tactical retreat, dear . Yes, yes. Good evening, major healey. Hi, jeannie. Very good. Wheres tony . Tony i have not seen major nelson since early this morning. Well, thats not like him to be late. We got a dinner date tonight, and im starved. Well, i do not understand it. He has never been this late without calling me before. Mm. Youre a little slow. You know, something funny is going on. No, not that that kind of funny. Hes been in a secret conference all day with a lot of senators and generals. And he did not tell you what it was all about . Mmmm. And i havent had a chance to get to him. Oh, well, you you do not think anything is wrong, do you . No, what could go wrong . The only thing that puzzles me is that hello, everybody oh, good evening, master. We were worried about you, master. Well, i got, uh i got tied up. Well, listen, if were going to dinner, wed better make it an early one. We gotta be at the simulator tomorrow, 6 00 in the morning. I wont be there, roge. Im not in the Space Program anymore. [ . . . ] , master . Thats right, jeannie. I cant believe it. Oh, they cant do that to you. Oh, they didnt do it. I did it. You mean you resigned . Thats right. I cant believe it. Why would you want to do a thing like that . Look, roge, um, ill wash up and well go out to dinner. Id rather not discuss it tonight. Lets not discuss the thing. Lets forget the thing. Im your best friend. You dont wanna discuss it . Okay, ill tell you what. You can just discuss the whole thing without me. You dont need me. I dont need you. Yeah, he is a little shocked, isnt he . Well. You really do not have to go back to cape kennedy, master . No, jeannie. [delighted squeal] oh, that is wonderful, master the first thing we will do is take a trip around the world. [giggles] what color yacht would you prefer, master . And would you rather travel east to west or west to east . East to west. Or west to east. What is a columbus, ohio . Its a city, jeannie. I havent retired, you know. Ive got a new job. What kind of a job . Well, im going to head up a a company that makes booster rockets for our missiles. And you would rather do that and live in this columbus, ohio than be an astronaut . Its not a question of what id rather do. Its that i couldnt turn it down. Hm. Well, why not . Because three senators and four generals asked me to take it. D there was no one else to take his place. Well, if it makes you happy, it makes me happy. Oh, yeah. Why shouldnt i be happy . Im gonna be Vice President in charge of production. Vice president . Columbus, ohio. Oh, i am pleased that they named a city after my friend. The booster rockets are very important to the Space Program. Columbus was such a nice man. [giggles] did you know that he used to get seasick . The only other man washington considered besides myself was a professor lakewood, and he turned it down because his wife wouldnt leave connecticut. He should never have been a sailor. Its the biggest break of my life. Ill have a huge salary and two secretaries, and i should be the happiest guy in the world. Jeannie good shall we go out to dinner now, master . Oh, no, thank you, jeannie. Im not hungry. I think ill go to bed early. Oh. You. Good night. [ . . . ] hi. Oh, hi, roge. Uh. Its, uh, nice. Yeah, its a tie. Oh, uh, congratulations. On what . Oh, i just heard the news about your, uh about your new civilian job. Oh, yeah. Well, when you get a big opportunity like this, you just cant let it, uh slip it through your fingers. Yeah, thats it. I hear youre gonna be Vice President in charge of production. Yeah, thats right. [sighs] ahem, roge, the reason i took the job is because oh. Look, you dont have to explain it to me. I mean, you know, two secretaries, a big office. I mean, youll be having a ball. Yeah. Yeah. Well, ill still be in the Space Program. Thats the important thing. Yeah, yeah, you, uh. Youll be behind a desk and, uh. Roge. What . I dont need this thing anymore. Why dont you take it, huh . Oh, yeah, well, uh. Well probably, uh, be running in to each other all the time. I mean, theres no no use saying goodbye. [both laugh] sure. Look, ill probably see you then. Okay. [ . . . ] roge. Um. I, uh, probably will need the cord. [both laugh nervously] well. I just cant go through with it, general peterson. Weve been all through this before. You dont wanna leave, and i dont want you to. But washington feels you can do a more important job for the Space Program by running a missile plant, and thats that but couldnt you just tell them that no i cant. You heard em yesterday. They want you, and im under orders to deliver you. Now, if i could find a way to keep you here, ny. Weve both given our word, and thats final. Yes, sir. Oh, its not going to be as bad as you think. Youll find out how the other half lives. A little luxury never hurt anybody. The last thing ii need in the world is luxury. I just turned down a a cruise on my own yacht. What . Oh, its its nothing, sir. Iisnt there a chance that you could call somebody and . The subject is closed, tony. All you can do is make the best of it im gonna miss you. Ill miss you, too, sir. [ . . . ] [playing frere jacques] fire oh i am so upset. Oh, you mean the tycoon . Oh, dont worry about him. Hes got it made. From now on, its go, go, go with the martinis and the golf balls. Oh, no, he is very unhappy. Can you not do something . Well, if we could just get him to change his mind, but how . How. Wait a minute. We know he wont be happy unless hes an astronaut, right . Right. And he certainly wont be happy sitting behind a desk. Ooh, that is right. Well, then, why cant he see it . Boy, if theres only some way we can get him to look into the future. Oh, but he can. That is easy. Thats easy. That you mean you can show him what its like . Of course. Jeannie, thats wonderful. One look at his new job, hell turn it down cold, just like that. Boy, lets go and show him. Very well. Oh, wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait. How bad is it . Well, i do not know. Would you like to see it . Yeah, wed better take a look at it first. No use shattering his ego too much. Just, um, pick his worst day. Hey, look at that. Oh what is it . Hey, how does it work . Well, first you put a drachma in. Oh, a drachma, yeah. You have drachmas. [laughs] now, turn the handle. Ah, okay. [ . . . ] oh, uh, that is too slow. Oh. A little faster. Not too fast. Just, just. Mm okay, that is better. [ . . . ] mr. Nelson . Tony mmhm . Hey, that is better. [chuckles] whoa, ha wait a minute. Would you like to sign this . In just a moment, jane. Ellen. [hits ball] oh, terrific well, thank you. Thank you. Uh, did miss brookes call . Oh, yes. Shed love to have lunch with you. Her chauffeur will pick you up. Oh, you have a terrace table at the country club. Mmhm. Oh, and, uh, your theater tickets are all set for this evening. Oh, good, good. Thank you. My pleasure. Oh, jane . Ellen. Ellen. Thank you. Mr. Nelson. Heres the report you asked for. Tony thank you, sue. Oh, i see productions up 27 percent. [chuckles] yes, and its all due to you. [clears throat] ill try to remember. Oh, general peterson is waiting to see you. General peterson . Well, show him right in. General peterson. Peterson thank you. Tony [chuckling] well, martin. What brings you to columbus . I just flew in to see you. I wanted to tell you what a great job youre doin. Tony thank you very much. Peterson were all proud of you. T. Hows roger . Hes fine. Sends his regards. [pushes intercom button] uh, sue, ive signed those contracts. I want to get them out in the early mail. Well, its, uh, quite a setup you got here, tony. Yes, its a team effort, as i said. Yeah, i can see that. I told you it wouldnt be so bad, once you got yourself, uh, adjusted. Yes, im trying to get it. Ii i dont find it easy. [door opens] [ . . . ] well, i wont detain you. Keep up the good work, tony. [laughs] feel free to drop in any time, martin. I wouldnt want to interrupt your schedule. Shall we go to work, tony . [ . . . ] what happened . It needs another drachma. Yeah. Yeah, well, give me another one. Hm. I am out of drachmas. Youre out of drachmas . At a time like this, youre out of drachmas. Oh, listen, is is that what an average day is like . Yes. And thats his worst day . Yes. Would you, uh, like me to show you a good day . Should we show major nelson what his new life will be like . Oh, if we show him that, well never get him to stay. No, were gonna have to think of something else. His first secretary should have worn a veil. Yeah, she shouldve worn a veil wait a minute. Wait a minute. You want tony nelson to be happy, dont you . You know i do. And you know hes not going to be happy unless hes an astronaut. Yes. What do you want me do to . Lie a little. [ . . . ] good evening, master. Oh, hi, jeannie. Hi. Pardon me. Packing, huh . Yeah, yeah. I think i found a buyer for the house. Oh, thats great. Great. Mm. Ive grown very fond of this place. Yeah, yeah, me too. Well, just think how exciting it will be living in columbus, ohio. Yeah. I wonder what your new life will be like. I dont know. Ii can show you if you like. Show me what . Would you like to see you in your new job . To see what its like in a typical day in the future . Say, a, uh, year from now . Could you do that . Of course. Well, it might be kind of interesting. Oh. Oh, yes, youre gonna be very happy, huh . Shall we show him his new job . Mmhm. Yeah. There. Oh, look, you gotta take a look at this. Now, i will put a drachma in. A drach . What is this thing . I thought you were all out of drachmas. What is this thing . Well, its, uh. Well, just turn the handle there. Youll watch very closely, master. Yeah, just, uh. [ . . . ] sally okay. [rings bell] [ringing bell] sally just a minute [typewriter keys clattering] what do ya want . These have gotta get out tonight. Well, it cant it wait till in the morning . Its after midnight. Look, as far as im concerned, i dont care if they get out at all. You think i like working these hours . I got a life of my own, you know. Gee, ii i know that, sally. Uh, maybe tomorrow we can finish early. It would help if they had somebody in your job who knew what he was doin. [phone ringing] huh . Your phone is ringing. Thank you. Hello. Oh, uh, yes, sir. You gotta cancel the order . Well, you cant do that now, sir. Well ii know we were supposed to have it out last night, but one of our machines broke down. Well, ii ill have it out first thing in the morning. Yes oh, please, help. Heres some more cancellations. More cancellations . Oh, and heres your dinner. I just got a call from the foreman. Oh yeah . Is the numberone machine . Is the number is the numberone machine fixed . Yes. Oh, good, good. But number two and three are out. Oh. I want a raise yeah, that figures. Oh, go on in. Nelson oh, sir oh hi, general peterson, its, uh uh, what brings you to town . I came down here to find out whats goin on. Uh, well, i know were a little behind in the booster rocket deliveries, sir a little behind . I think youre deliberately sabotaging us why, this is the worst defense plant in the country. Well, sir, ii were having a little trouble with our equipment, but were having it fixed. Ii wwere working around the clock. Dont bother. We just canceled all your defense contracts. Oh, sir, you cant do that. I give me a chance. Uh, we well get them out as soon as possible i gave you a chance, nelson you let me down yeah, bbut general, look, if you just the numberone machine has broken down again. [nervous laugh] and if aggie gets a raise, i want a raise you want a raise. You heard it, buster. You ow [ . . . ] youve done it again here. Fix it wait a minute. Ive gotta fix it i gotta fix it . [indistinct yelling] is it really gonna be that bad . Oh, uh, ahem. Yes, master. Oh, thats terrible. I knew youd hate it. Did you see that office and those secretaries . I never thought it was gonna be that bad. I knew itd shake you up. Now that you know about it. Now that i know about it, im gonna get down there fast [ . . . ] he would not be in this trouble in the first place if it were not for that professor lakewoods silly wife. Yeah, it was all his silly wifes fault. Who . The wife of the other man they wanted for the job. Major nelson said he refused it. Because of his wife . Yes. She has a home in connecticut, and she does not want to leave it. That is what . Thats the person were gonna work on, his wife. Oh, but if she loves her home, how can i make her leave it . Yeah. Oh, if you loved your home, what would make you leave it . Oh, you mean . Yeah. [both shiver] thats the most incredible thing i ever heard. No, tonys on his way over here now. Ill talk to him and get back to you. Poor woman. [knock on door] it down. Thanks, sir. Hey, tony, uh. How do you really feel about this job youre taking over . Oh, i consider it a great opportunity, sir. Its the kind of challenge any young man would be proud of. Between us. I hate it. [laughs] how would you like to stay where you are . You mean i dont have to go, sir . Well, its up to you. You can have the job if you want to. But i think i ought to tell you, i had a call from professor lakewood. He says hell take the job if you dont want it. Well, ii understood his wife didnt want to leave her house. She was driven out by snakes. Snakes . Why, its the most incredible thing you ever heard of. She was getting into bed, and the snakes came up the stairs and into her room. He says there were thousands of them. Anyway, she refused to set foot in the house again. If you dont mind giving up a big job and a big salary and two secretaries. And two secretaries. Your place in the Space Program is still open. Oh i see youre unpacking. [chuckles] huh . Oh, yeah, i guess you havent heard the news. Uh, news . Im yeah, im im not going. Od. He had a wife who wouldnt leave hello, master. Oh. I am ready to leave for columbus, ohio. Were not going to columbus. Were staying right here. We are . What happened . Roger this professor and his wife were driven out of their house by snakes. The snakes ran under the bedroom and she came out screaming. Wait a minute. How do you know that . A lucky guess . Jeannie. I have some house cleaning. Jeannie, did you send those snakes to that poor woman . Oh, please, do not be angry, master. I only did it to help you. Dont be angry . Youre asking wait a minute. Dont blame her. It was my idea. I guess we shouldnt have butted in in the first place, huh . Well, if you hadnt had, id never have forgiven you. Do you mean that . Of course i do. Oh, master [delighted squeal] oh, does he not look handsome . Oh, welcome back. [laughing] thank you. Thank you very much. You do all this research on a perfect car, raises your rates. Maybe you shouldve done more research on them. For drivers with accident forgiveness, Liberty Mutual wont raise your rates due to your first accident. And if you do have an accident, our claims centers are available to assist you 24 7. Call for a free quote today. Liberty stands with you . Nice talking to you. [whistling] um, any luck, roge . Well, uh, everyones got a date tonight. You know how busy monday nights are. Yeah. Yeah. Listen, do you mind if just the, uh, three of us go to dinner tonight . Oh, of course not. No, no, fine. Yeah. Hey, wait a minute. Do you know that cute little secretary, the one without the veil, with the . Oh, yes. Well, i was wondering, if shes not doing anything tonight, is it all right, master . Hm . Oh, i dont know. I havent seen her, but if if its all right with roger, its okay with me. Oh, shes beautiful. Youll love her. Oh, just would you mind, jeannie . Just, you know . Of course. Im used to getting picked up at my place. I hope we dont go to some cheap restaurant. Im all dressed up, and i wanna go someplace nice. I spent 29. 50 on this dress, and i dont wanna waste it. Who wont take you dancing. The last fellow i went out with insisted that we go to some crummy place. We ended up. [jeannie singing in foreign dialect] insisted that we go to some good morning, master. Ended up. How are you feeling this morning . Uh, to tell the truth, im not here is your breakfast. All of your favorite dishes. Oh. Well, uh, jeannie, thanks a lot look. I dont miss atom bomb and miss galaxy are in town. I have pressed your dinner jacket, and you and major healey are going to take them out tonight. And i am going to stay in my bottle, so that i will not accidentally cause you any trouble. Hm. I do not want anything to spoil this evening for you. Wh uh, what made you change your mind . Oh, i have not changed my mind. All i want is for you to be happy. That is all i have ever wanted. Oh. They are such beautiful girls. Enjoy your breakfast, master. I will see you tomorrow. Hold it. Hold it . Yeah, i want to discuss this. [chuckles] oh, well. Discuss what, master . Oh, uh, breakfast in bed. Uh uh, you wanting me to go out with miss atom bomb. Uh, you staying in your bottle and not bothering me all day. And being so terribly nice about everything. Thats what i want to discuss. Oh, well, of course, master. Why . Uh, why . Uh, when you start repeating everything i say, i know that im in trouble. Now, whats going on . Uh, going on . Jeannie. [giggling] well, i mean i mean, well well, what could be going on . I dont know. Thats what i want to find out. Find out . Lets see. Now, i, um i know its not my birthday. And its certainly not your birthday. No. But its some kind of a special day, isnt it . [chuckling] well, it. A very little day. Uhhuh. Now, look [laughing] oh. I see. Now were getting somewhere. Where are we getting . The hahaji is the, uh, master of all the genies. Oh, i see. I see. And on hajis birthday, you act especially nice. [gasps] you guessed it, master. Have a wonderful time. I will see you tomorrow. Yeah hold it. Why do i keep feeling like theres something more . Oh. I cannot imagine, master. [chuckles] but there is. But it it it is such a tiny little thing, i did not even want to bother you with it. [laughs] bother me. [laughs] well. This will amuse you. Yeah, amuse me. Go ahead. Well. Each year on hajis birthday. All the masters who are unhappy with their genies are able to send them away for good. [both laughing] jeannie, let me get something straight. If i send you away, yove to go . Well, i know it is ridiculous, but but i can . [laughs] well, i ii know you would not even dream of doing such a thing. No. No, of course not. Yeah, what time do i have to let you know . You have until midnight. Midnight. Oh, but do not even think about it, master. Ill be good. I will grant your every wish. And i will stay in my bottle and not get you into any trouble. You may go out with all the beautiful girls you want to. Okay. And there is no okay. You mean it is all right . No. I mean, i want to think about it. Oh, you wish to think about it . [snaps]. Just like that . Yeah. [snaps]. Just like that. I only have until midnight. Oh, she wasnt going to tell me, you know. I had to drag it out. Oh, if she hadnt been so nice to me, i wouldnt have gotten suspicious. Hm. Well, uh, what are you, uh what are you gonna do . I dont know. I think im gonna have to send her away. Well, why would you want to do a thing like that . Roger, i dont want to do that, but i dont have any choice. Ever since ive met her, ive been in trouble. Boy, am i gonna miss her. So am i. Well, she cant help being the way she is. Oh, i know that. Shes a shes a warmhearted. Beautiful, impetuous, troublemaker. Thats what she is a troublemaker. Hello, master. Hi, jeannie. How many times have i told you not to pop in in Public Places . Jeannie good morning, major healey. Roger good morning, jea jeannie. Get a chair. Get a chair. Get a chair, get a chair i got a chair. Get a chair. Get a chair. I am sorry to bother you, master, but you left your briefcase at home, and i thought you might need it. Well, thank you, jeannie. You shouldnt have troubled. Oh, nothing is too much trouble for you, master. Anytime, anyplace. And my only wish is to make you happy. I know you do, jeannie. And and youve been wonderful, and weve had a great year. But ive come to a decision, and i think i iii had better go home and see if you left anything else. Oh, jeannie jea boy, oh, boy. How could you do it . Do what . Make her leave . Well, roger, i cant let her go on running my life. Well, when does she ever run your life . Wha what kind of a memory do you have . She thought i looked tired, and i needed a rest . She made every day sunday. I remember i i i walked into the living room one day. And i. Do you do you know what kind of chaos this could create . I only know that you have been working too hard, and it is not good for you. Now jeannie it is no use talking about it, master. This is for your own good. It is going to remain sunday until you have rested. Hm. It will give you a chance to do all those things you enjoy. And im not gonna let you do this. Im gonna put my foot down [elephant trumpets] [roars] jeannie try it on. No. Jeannie, will you stop fooling around. Im telling you for the last time jeannie [spits] jeannie you remember that . Yeah, id forgotten that. It was pretty funny. [both laugh] yeah, dr. Bellows almost caught me. That wasnt very funny. Master . Oh, jeannie, what are you doing here . Well, i oh, im s im sorry. What are you doing, anyway . What are you . Oh yeah. Say, what have you done to yourself . Ght you might prefer me with dark hair. No, i like you just the way you were. Oh, did you, master . Yeah. Thank you i will go tell haji. Uh, no, thats not what i had in mind. Oh boy, its pitiful. Shed do anything to please you. Well, do you think im gonna enjoy sending her away . Its just, i i cant take a chance on keeping her. Well, if you send her back to the haji, youll never see her again, ever. Yeah, thats right. Why dont you give her another chance anyway . You remember the things shes done to you . Hey, shes never done anything to me. Roger, do you remember the time i got hit on the head and got amnesia . Oh, yeah. And i i forgot who jeannie was. And i fell in love with her . Yeah. She wanted to marry you. Yeah, and you threatened to tell me that she was a genie. Yeah, she was mad. Whew, boy. Yeah, remember what happened when she lost her temper. Yeah. Woo. [squawking] yeah. Get away. Get away from here. Get away. [yells indistinctly] oh, boy. I got sunburn, frostbite, and a case of the bends all in the same day. Yeah. And that was just one of jeannies average days. Yeah. Oh. Jeannie. Well, now that youre here, id oh. Now, you look lovely. [giggles] oh, thank you, master. I was hoping that it would please you. It pleases me. Yes. Well, i, uh jeannie, im afraid im gonna have to send you back. Shes, uh, really hard to pin down, isnt she . Well, dont worry. Shell go back. This time i have the haji on my side. Oh, good evening, master. Hello, jeannie. Glad youre here. I want to talk to you. Ive ive come to a decision whoa. Oh, jeannie, what do you think youre doing . Oh. I want you to be comfortable, master. Listen. Ah uh [coughing, sneezing] [wheezing] those feathers. [stammers] this time, youre not going to get away with this. [harp music playing] [coughs] oh, i i uh, good evening. Uh oh, very nice. Ver very nice. Jeannie, this is not gonna work this time. [wheezing] what . Jeannie, i dont smoke. And i certainly wouldnt smoke a hookah if i did. [coughing] i am sorry, master. Do you know what i have decided to do . What . I have decided to bring you all the treasures of the world. We are going to start with the buried gold of the incas. Hey no. The rubies of the rajahs . No. The diamonds of the . No. Well, where would you like to start . Oh, but i thought youd enjoy now. Ah. [coughs] oh, uh. This one too, huh. Im terribly sorry, miss. It was very nice. Oh, thats better. [chuckling] oh, jeannie, i am feeling. Now the hammock. Oh. Yeah. Thank you. [screams] oh forget it. Its its okay. Oh, i do not know what to do. I i cannot seem to please you. No. You you please me very much. Do i . Yes, yes. If, uh if i ever wanted a genie in the whole wide world, youd be the genie id want. Oh, thank you, mas but i dont want a genie. Oh, not even a genie who will not give you any trouble. Who whose every thought is to make you very happy and comfortable . [scoffs] comfortable . Y you remember the what happened the last time you tried to make me comfortable . Huh . [screams] ah oh [yells indistinctly] jeannie i cant hold on any. [croaks] [screams] and ever since i found you, my whole life has been like that. I i i go from disaster to disaster. Well, all thats gonna change. As of midnight tonight, im gonna be free as a. Jeannie . Jeannie all right, jeannie, i see you in there. You might as well start packing. As of midnight tonight, tony come out, jeannie. [sighs] would you please come out . You are gonna be nice and sensible about this, arent you . No, master. Thats a good girl. Ye oh, yes you are. But it is so unfair. I make one teeny little mistake yeah, but you keep doing them over and over again. I im sorry. I cant have you interfering in my life any longer. I . Interfere in your life . Telling you terrible tales. I would never do that. Would you . Of course not. Oh, if theres anything i cannot stand, itit it. Its an interfering genie. [sighs] yes, thats exactly the way i feel about it, jeannie. Good then there is no problem. I will be right back, mas uhuh oh, im not through yet. You are not through yet . No, no. I know you dont mean to interfere. Oh, no. But you do. Oh. When have i ever interfered in your life . Uh do do you remember the night i had a date with an old friend of mine . Uh. Charlie charlie suzie. Good evening, master. You did not tell me you were going out tonight. Oh, didnt i . Mm. Well, it mustve slipped my mind. Oh. You are all dressed up. [gasps] i am ready. Where are we going tonight, master . Uh, we are not going anywhere. I have a date tonight with an old friend of mine from chicago. Jeannie, what do you think youre doing . You have been working much too hard lately, master. It would be better if you stayed home and rested. Well, i ill decide that. Now, im going out. And, uh this jealousy of yours is ridiculous. Oh, well, i am not jealous, master. Who is this girlfriend . Shes uh, hes a very Old School Chum of mine from ohio. Uh. Yes. We went to school together, and. Ah, what is her name . Suzie. Charlie suzie. Oh, master. Thou art not dealing with a stupid genie. You will stay home tonight. No, im not. I promised id visit him, and visit him im going to. Now, give me my clothes. No, master. All right. Then ill go and get dressed myself. You can make me late, but you cant keep me here. This is not a jail, you know. [snickers] jeannie. Jeannie, let me out of here now, that wasnt very nice, was it . Well, i ii thought it would amuse you. Did you . Yes. Well, it didnt. You know why it didnt . Because you you made me break my date. Ah. But i let you keep it the next night, do you remember . Oh, yes, i remember. You see . And everything turned out fine. I will go tell haji that you no. No . Do you remember what happened when you let me keep the date . Well, let me refresh your memory. I was there with joan. To us. Ill drink to that. [coughs] [chuckles] jea jeannie. Jeannie i thought she looked better that way. I think you see what i mean, jeannie. It, uh it wont work. It just wont work. Your mind is made up then . Yes. Yes, it is. [sighs] well, i. I will miss you, master. Ill miss you too. I am yours until midnight. Ii would like to do something for you. Oh, no. Nothing, thank you. Oh, please. It will make me so happy. No, really. I want you to look nice for miss galaxy. Oh. Well, thank you very much, jeannie. I better be getting along. Will you be here when i get back . [clears throat] uh, jeannie. Yes . I, uh. I just wanted to thank you for everything. Oh. Would you. Kiss me goodbye . Oh, sure. [door opens, closes] [sighs] goodbye, master. Music playing] tony. Whats it like to go into orbit . Oh, yes yes. Uh, roger, what time is it . Ro uh, what time is it . I got 9 30. Whats the matter with you . You keep asking me what time is it. I think my watch has stopped. Thats right. Ninethirty. Dont worry. I dont have to be back until february. [laughing] oh, yes. You know. Uh, why why dont we do that. I dont think youve heard a word ive said. Oh, im sorry, ann. If youve got a problem, maybe i could help you with it. The only person who could help me is me. More hot sake . How could you let me do that . I must have missed part of the conversation. How could i let you do what . Fine friend you turned out to be. Well. I must have been out of my mind. I cant go on without her. You mean youve changed your mind . I wish i knew what everybody was talking about . It cant be 9 30 uh, pardon me. Could you tell me what time it is, please . Mm. Its, uh, one minute past midnight. [sighs] heres to the best genie a master ever had. Yeah. [narrator] what if you had a medical emergency away from home . My chest hurts, i cant breathe. Premiere mobile medical alert system. Most systems only work at home, but with mobilehelp, you get help outside the home with coverage nationwide on one of the largest Cellular Networks at the press of a button. I couldnt dial 911 because i was out of it. I just pushed the button and when i woke up i was in the hospital. I dont have to worry about if im near help or if i even know where i am. I have mobilehelp, they know where i am. If you were to call 911, they would not know what your issues are. Mobilehelp has all that on file, so the Emergency Responders already know what my needs are. There are things i wouldnt do if i didnt have mobilehelp. Mobilehelp is a lifesaver, literally and figuratively. With mobilehelp, i feel safe. I feel secure, and i have my life back. [narrator] call the number on your screen for a free fullcolor brochure. And the waterproof pendant and wrist button. You can also add the fall button that automatically detects falls and signals help help even if your unconscious and unable to press the button. There is no equipment to buy and no longterm contract. Act now and well include an emergency key box free with your plan purchase. Call now and ask how you can save with our special holiday promotion. Dont settle for a medical alert system that only works at home. Mobilehelp has given me my life i have freedom to live now. [narrator] join the thousands of people nationwide already using mobilehelp, haji, i want to talk to you. You cant have jeannie back. Theres, um, been some kind of a mistake. Something went wrong with my watch. Now, its up to me to decide if i want to send her back. And ive decided i do not want to send her back. Are you listening . All right, ill tell you what ill do. Ill fight you for her. Thanks, jeannie. [laughing] jeannie. Jeannie. You escaped no, master. How did you get away from the haji . I did not go to haji. Yeah but you but you said that at midnight, you had to yes, master. Midnight, hajis time. Midnight, hajis time. Well, i, uh i set your watches back. You set our watches back . Well, i did not think you wanted me to go, really. Oh ye too late too late, yes. Uh. Uh, that is, until next year. Yes. Do you mind very much . Well, i guess i could put up with you for another year. Oh, i am glad. Yeah, but you remember, youre gonna keep your promises. Youre gonna stay in your bottle and not interfere in my life. Oh, that is right, master. Welcome home. Oh. Thank you, master. [both laugh] okay, now, back in the bottle. Oh, where are you going . Oh, well, im going back to the tokyo house. I have a date, remember . And you are going back there . Yeah, sure. Good night. Jeannie wait. Jeannie, what do you think youre doing . It is past midnight, master, and you should be in bed. You have a hard day tomorrow, and you should be fresh. I will see you in the morning. Jeannie, now, you cut this out. Jeannie . Green acres is the place to be . . Farm livin is the life for me . . Land spreadin out so far and wide . . Keep manhattan, just give me that countryside . . New york is where id rather stay . . I get allergic smelling hay . . I just adore a penthouse view . . Darling, i love you, but give me park avenue . . The chores