little pills how to keep pharmaceutical pills. knows the fearless meaning of a friend's kisser hug. and converts to spirituality. knows the dim to light to allude detection to be grateful for the gift the clothing and shelter. to remain silent. aids knows to time on earth. but no matter how much you drink, you are all dehydrated. i choice of taking pleasure in what is left in life. the thoughts of suicide in the back of your head. that everyone still thinks it's a deserving fate for gays and prostitutes and the children born of designer jewelry. knows how to be used to profit politicians. providing flatter for art and something to be left behind. he has left his angels behind. none of us knowing where exactly we are headed. and this is also a new poem. it's potentially the title of my next poetry collection. i read a lot about religion being raised catholic. this is called just like jesus. if i get struck down by thunder. just like jesus. i want childhood to be, evading teen angst. always. i want to encourage and motivate just like jesus. few literates could conquer. simply by having faith, i want to arouse. make you believe there's a god above watching over us. without scientific explanation. i want to cast out your demons. liberate your oppressed soul. bring back lost friends. just like jesus, be a shameless pervert while with the possibility of sexism and paternal. just like jesus, i want to hear the voice of my farther. bask in the stars, this is not an end but a beginning. a sepia tone of martarism. i want my engage capturred. to frame the minds of ignorants. while blindly following leaders. i want to be nestled, half naked against your chest. claiming your spirit when you come. with the promise of salvation. i simply want to life before i die. i have two more poems. this is all new. wrote it for harold bloom. he first called it the death of art and. reading well is one the greatest pleasures. i am dedicating to harold bloom. i am not a poet. i want to be rich. i have had a great sex life. i am not a poet. georgia i do not like being called an act visit. i cannot be considered a vegetarian. i will give my ass up and like it. i would be inspired. i may value peace, but will not use a pen to unleash my anger. i am not a poet. i am not dying. weight loss can still be a choice. i am not a poet. i don't care much for. i don't spend me weekends read anything writing. i like to have cocktails but i do not have a drinking problem regardless of what state i wake up in. i don't need drugs to open up my imagination. i am not a poet. i can tolerate half an hour of spoken word poetry. what my cats are up to. i always carry my business cards. i am not a poet, i only write to masture bait my mind. i am trying to convince myself that poetry it save lives. it's the dust of art. and i am going to close with to poet. americano. i look at myself in the mirror. trying to figure out what makes me an american. i see chickens. practicing religions without a roof. i see my own blood. proud american blue genes labels. i see them sits outside with the eyes of an alley cat. i see myself trying to be more like james dean. i see carlos san tanna. more than sporadic latino explosions. as american as bruce spring teen and elvis presley. i see taco bell. i see purple, red, blue, green, orange. i see cheetah revera on broadway. as american as the lee's, the kennedys. none sound american to me. i am not a shamed. jose can you see. i pledge allegiance to this country. land of commercialism. if i can win gold medals. if i can sign my life away. ain't no language. this is my country too. i believe in free dom and diversity, need to get the hell out. [applause] >> i have one more performer. can you believe that? i am so excited. he is a very kind man to be here. he's a total icon. tales of the city. his book that was made do a city. he's here on his book tour. thank you very much. well, i would not have missed this evening for anything. you and i both know these things can be boring. not tonight. i like to read, since i'm back home from a tour. i would like to read the chapter that my editor wanted me to remove. i have to set it up for you. michael toliver is 55 years old. they have gone to florida because his mother has died. and they have been out to the rest home, to the bear bar in orlando. they meet a black bear, that is a husky african-american guy and the guy basically propositions them. proposes a three way. they decided he seems like a great guy. they tell him about their b and b. the innamong the flowers. it doesn't mean anything because it was camouflage night at the full moon saloon. we felt compelled to tidy up. and reaging toilet. you force him to shower. we stashed it in the closet. he grabbed a razor and headed for the stall. you better be faithful about it. it's down right inhospitable. he was dressed in a while, v-neck tee shirt. nothing. just wondering about the dress code. where your dress pants. you look hot in those. did you see my ring? i swear you would lose your head if it wasn't attached. this was my mother. i wondered if her death would release me or if i was doomed to norman bates territory. he will be here in five minutes. half an hour later, after i squeezed. we were awkward as wall flowers. the lamp was already blazing with intensity. my growing hard on >> he seemed amenable. he got cold feet? may be he lost interest. ben shrugged. who knows. i would be with us in the second. i am serious. don't you feel abandoned. it's a three way honey, i don't think two people can feel abandoned. he might be late. i looked at the clock again. 25 minutes. only hustlers can get away with that. he's not a hustler? ben turned and looked at me. you think i bought us a hustler? how pathettic tic do you think we are? >> i sort of felt like he targeted us. i didn't get that sense. may be i'm wrong. ben smiled. you are disappointed. no , i said, no just annoyed. he pulled down the waist band. i don't need a mercy suck. he looked up. mercy suck. whatever. undeterred ben got down to business. mercy i said, there was when mr. johnson knocked on the door. you may have figured it out by now. to us, he was still the great dark man. a mythical man or object to desire. it was probably why we jumped to attention. jesus. tucking the incriminating evidence. wait. let this go down first. >> why? i don't know. seems rude. ben widened his eyes at me. did you learn that from miss manners. i hid myself. this probably made me look grand. that somehow seemed preferable. men opened the door. he was standing there. i'm sorry fellows. come on in. our visitor shot a quick glance. can we get you something to drink? remaining seated. there's a soda machine. no thanks. did you have a hard time finding us. i'm michael i said. finally standing. this is ben. he shook our hands. i'm patrees. i am worried that it might make me squirm. i found it hospitable. that it put he more at easy. we're glad you came. patrice smiled. ben caught my guy. he began to rearrange the forskin. it seemed to swell. when he removed it, he said, i open it's okay. i'm sort of a kiss pig. no problem. as i caught my breath. ben removed. he reported getting a big laugh. i should tell you something. i am used to this moment arising. i tried to make it easier for him. we always play safe. so it's something else. we waited for the penny to drop. i do your momma's hair. this simply did not compute. ben looked up at him completely open mouthed. what he murmured. i do his momma's hair. in this moment of raw revelation. the obvious pride she showed in her new hair dresser. i thought you were a woman. how did you about who we were? >> she has a picture of y'all in her room. y'all by waterfall. she talks about you all the time. jesus said ben. what are the chances of this? patrice shrugged. why didn't you say something earlier? they ain't going to happen with your momma in the conversation. i liked the way he naild that down. i felt bad about it later. i almost didn't come. i need a break from here and it might as well be y'all. how often does he get her hair done. i do her make up too. you cover up the blue. she has emphysema. she got to worrying about it. it must have been lennor. she looks really good. i like to work on old ladies. no one objected. he pulled me closer. within seconds he had us both in hand. like an eager barby doll. sorry. every now and then, my own visuals overwhelm me. then he went down on both. i can understand why my editor didn't want this. then we went down, never neglecting either one of us. ben pulled my face into his and kissed me. in a three way, there's always the danger of being left out. i never felt unwelcome on the ride. by the time we were naked, by the time i shot my load, i rolled it on to patrice. he came on all fours. never touches himself. i know because i was under neath, catching the flash. ben stayed there. his heart beating hard. then my cell phone rang. it's programmed to ring like an old 40's ring. leave it said ben. from the middle of the panting stack of men. nobody move said ben. there was a brief silent. or at least when i do. sorry. that's okay said ben. patrice rolled off the bed. then he flickinged it into the toilet. what's this? his head was on my which of the now. that's an orchid. it keeps coming back. one with of those extra touches that mean a lot. he stared down at this offering. it don't look right somehow. i know. especially with a condom on it. he cleaned up at the sink. he started gathering up his clothes. hang with us for a while. busy day tomorrow. >> my other job, bacheloret party. i strip for private parties. that's what this is for. he was stepping into his fatigues. apparently impressed. it ain't worth the bus fair half the time. patrice shrubbed. if a sister has a plate of ribs, there's no way to held her attention. ben and i laughed. i'm serious. tickled to his response. i am up there working my ass off and they are sitting down there with their press on nails. tough crowd. they say they like the mens, he drew out the last. but they don't like the mens like the mens. they don't tip as good either. he came to the bed until we came his naked book