0 of being no officer. >> again in 1984. >> oh, that its the first time i stopped hugging first. i like that. >> and a third time in 1994. >> don't you sometimes just bust to share the joke. >> what joke? >> well here is your friends thinking we are unmarried and into all sorts of wickedness when all along we are married and up to nothing at all. >> tonight i will talk with debra winger about why she walked away from movie stardom and what she was walking toward, what she learned dating then governor bob kerrey, the life she has built with her fellow actor and picking up her movie career in recent years. the strange way jonathan demi wanted to direct her in rachel getting married and landmark documentary she worked on that changed the national debate on fracking. debra winger tonight "up late." and you don't know all the back stories you. don't know. you don't. you hardly know who painted the set unless you make a point to meet him or her. so i was by nature the person who wanted to know that all the time. i wanted to meet. show up when i wasn't working. i could meet the guy who was painting the set. because -- i'm interested in this -- in this unbelievable collaboration of artists >> you realize how collaborative it is the more you do it. >> it is beautiful. at some point it was. i'm sure now on another level. if i was interested in the technology then i would love to go and meet the people that work the computers that do cgi. it is not my particular area of interest. but i respect it. and so, i just was always interested in that. and when -- it fell apart, when it fell apart -- one fell apart that i happened to be on. it wasn't quite so beautiful. like there were a lot of faking truth, beauty, truth and beauty. and that -- that, two things i will say. i don't want to take up forever with this. the opportunities to embrace that were more elusive. a job, money. the scripts i wanted to do, were elusive. also another condition, mentorship. i had a guy who was my agent. my first agent when i started. my agent for 11 years. >> i bet i know the guy. >> michael bloom. a little agency here in new york. michael was my agent. he was a real mentor. some body who would say to me. we would run our agency like a small vietnamese coffee shop. but they did care lining up what you were interested in in life, you know where you were at in your life with, what you wanted to explore in a role. because -- we're living our lives, while we are acting. so, for me, i mean this may sound -- you know, people are now -- either turning the channel or rolling their eyes so loudly that the person next to them cannot hear. if i am doing this thing, with the same time that i am living, breathe might heart is beating, and i am taking in air, so -- i am not really making that happen. that's happening to me. i should be trying to sync them up. so i didn't really want to be doing things that, that -- didn't help me investigate something that i was interested in. >> dead you fiid you find that move sprees you we movies you were making? >> yes, magic that they came. i believed that, it was magical that i got to do what i got to do. and so when people ask me -- excuse me, but the stupid question of what i said no to or what i didn't do? you know what? i was busy doing this. and also, i didn't -- it isn't that i had any -- opinion. about other things. i just am focused on what i am interested in. like now. i am not walking away from anything. >> right. >> i am walking towards the thing that -- >> right. >> that i'm interested in. >> it may not concern you or involve you is the problem. you snow like it may be my children because they're at an age where i really want to be with them. it may be this cause because i can't understand going on without it if something happens to. >> i must address that. >> our water. nothing else will matter to me. >> i fuound that i would -- i would get to the point where he would say to me, his program, was here is -- here are decisions you are going to make. i want you to see how this is a short term decision and here is a long term decision. here its for the short term. here its of what the industry wants you to do. here are the consequences, see, see, see, see. nowadays, my agent i have now. >> everything is timeless. >> completely self-determining now. >> a pz tiositive way of puttin. self determination. >> well, because there is no -- i think in a way time its different. you know, time has been messed with. i mean -- if, because if you do something then -- it doesn't matter when you do it because it will be on the internet, you know, or anybody can google it on youtube, i have all these terms right? because you know i don't do any of these. you know this. that, you know you don't quote somebody anymore you retweet. so the whole -- the thing has changed -- the part that is interesting to me is -- how it's messed with time. there is not the same chronology to a career because it its sort of they can dig up stuff. >> people don't understand who you are as one famous actor, i admire, he had this interesting -- >> if i guess it, will you tell me? >> off camera. you can write it down on a piece of paper. >> no pens here. >> no pens. >> you could write me notes. this very famous man who was going through reversal in his private life. he said the internet represents the death of forgetting. because there are some things that need to be forgotten. you can't move on. he said, we can't reinvent ourselves. >> don't think it's the death of forgetting. it's the birth of forgetting. because we don't have to remember anything. amke care of business.