i made the call to my wife, told her i loved her, i didn't know whether i would be able to make it out of that chamber like dozens or other members, like journalists, police officers there. over 140 beaten, one was killed, one later took his life. it was a terrible brutal and violent day. let's not forget the hours and the days after where my gop colleagues, the way they were talking, the way they were acting. i remember specifically hours after we had retaken the capitol and gone in and recertified the election, kevin mccarthy gets up on the house floor. we were all sitting there on the house floor. there was still the smell of teargas and broken glass all over, and he gave this speech about how people held the breach against the mob and made sure the house chamber hadn't been taken. he called me out by name and several other members. you fast forward a couple months, it really wasn't a big deal, it's all about politics.