Night. [ laughter ] protesters interrupted the show to protest ryan lochte, upset that the olympic swimmer is part of the competition and decided to run onstage to tell everyone about it. This is what viewers saw at home. Watch as judge Carrie Ann Inaba tries to give ryan his score. You brought your best to this ballroom. You have a long way to go excuse me, hey, back off excuse me excuse me excuse me wow. Okay. Ill tell you what. All right. Were going to well take a break. Well get the rest of the judges comments. Take a deep brett. Well be right back. Jimmy thats right. Keep calm and bergeron. That could be a good shirt, print it up. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thats what they aired. This the producers of the show gave this to us. Saw. Excuse me. Hey, back off excuse me, excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me. Jimmy thats one of the protesters. Two men and four women. Security took them that tackle sadly was the closest abc will ever get to having monday night football on the network. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] the men suspicion of trespassing or as they call on it dancing with the stars, trespasse doble. Access hollywood got an interview with one of them who explained why he did this. What was your plan when you guys rushed the stage . You can see that lochte is a liar. He hurt americans in brazil. Two of his own teammates were detained because he ran away and lied. How long have you been planning this for . But we want to publicize that this is a bad decision to have a liar be jimmy then they blocked him out. Good way to know you dont have to worry about in your life, if you decide to protest ryan lochte being on dancing with the stars. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy you know . I mean, i get that he wants to see him punished, but i dont think this guy realizes, being on dancing with the stars is his punishment. [ laughter ] youd think hed be doing this if things had gone well . By the way, where were these guys when paula deen was on the show, when tom delay was on the show, warren sapp, floyd mayweather, o. J. . [ laughter ] o. J. Wasnt on dancing with the stars . Well, he will be with Good Behavior. Alfonso ribeiro, who happens to be a former mirrored ball winner, was in attendance and offered this harrowing account of the events as they occurred. I had actually a front row go. I got up out of my chair. [ laughter ] jimmy and didnt move. A lot of the celebrities im sure were upset, none of them more upset than vanilla ice. We obtained this exclusive footage. This has not been seen. Of vanilla talking about the effect the disruption had on every member of the cast. Some jerk comes out here and takes the fun out of the whole room. Messing and hating with an this guy, ryan, he wont gold medal for america. Okay . Who cares about the stupid story . He was drunk, whatever. Who cares . It doesnt have anything to do with anything. What matters is this guy is a hero and he came out here to dance. [ laughter ] jimmy you tell em, vanilla. [ cheers and applause ] a hero. He came out here to dance. I love this stuff so much, i really do. Ryan lochte himself was a little shaken up. Feeling. He said, so many feelings are going through my head. No thoughts. But a lot of feelings. He was too shaken up to give his account of what happened. But cameras caught up with ryan today at the beach where he shared his version of that scary moment. The guy pulled out his gun, he docked it, put it to my forehead, he said get down, and i was like i put my hands up, i was like, whatever. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy ill have to go back to the tape. Hey, the Los Angeles Rams made their season debut last night on monday night football. Hey, its their first game with the l. A. Logo on their helmets. They were shellacked by the 49ers 280. I think thats good. Ill tell you, whats more l. A. Than having your premiere tank . [ laughter ] we have a fun show for you tonight [ cheers and applause ] Patrick Dempsey is here. Bridget joness baby. Dr. Justin schmitt, an entomologist, hes known epffor being stung by bugs in order to record how much every sting hurts. They had a rehearsal with him today. Our stage manager alec put a camera on alec for a second. It was his birthday yesterday. Alec is very jumpy. Youre a im a little bit jumpy, jimmy. Jimmy more than a little bit, you are the jumpiest person i know. There are olympic hurdlers who are less jumpy than you are. Watch this. This happened at rehearsal today. Now were going to get it out of the jars. This doesnt do anything weird to me . No, theyre pretty surefooted. Okay. Im just going to put my hand flat. I apologize if i hurt this bug. Tickle . Aah get it off me [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy wow. Did it sting you . It didnt, it just kind of moved around. Tickled its fancy. I went, aahsclabl. Jimmy do that again in slow motion, the fancy tickling that happened. Aarrgghh jimmy oh my god. Like if you have a bug in your house, does your wife go get it . Im supposed to do it. I dont know. Sometimes. Jimmy weve got to get you on a bear grylls show. That would be a great episode. Weve got bugs coming. Maybe youll help me with that segment. Happily, jimmy. Jimmy that would be great. The united states, i dont know if youre aware, is getting fatter. And not just civilians. Department of defense today, the u. S. Military is heavier than ever. 7. 8 of the military is considered to be clinically overweight. Theyre so fat, ryan cant find his privates anymore. [ laughter ] [ drumroll ] even the combat units are getting fatter. In 2001, only 1 of 60 combat troops was overweight. Now its 1 of 13. Some navy s. E. A. L. S are said to be turning into navy wall ruleses. [ laughter ] [ drumroll ] jimmy warming up for the emmys. In combat, overweight troops can be a liability because they can slow their fell he soldiers down and make for easier targets. For enemy troops. On the record, theyre great to hide behind. [ laughter ] and for shade. You know, you dont always have a tree. This is probably not going to improve our physical fitness. Walmart is said to be developing shopping carts that drive the way it works is you will hail a shopping cart with your smartphone and it comes directly to you, like a puppy. The carts can roll to the aisle that has the item youre looking for, see if its there, and roll back to you so you can go get it. Or just order from amazon and stay at home. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] im sure it will be a fun thing at first. Selfwheeling carts. I feel were one step away from selfchewing mouths. Its great news for you can just fill up your cart and tell it to meet you at home. [ laughter ] in North Carolina yesterday, a fight broke out at a Trump Campaign rally. Either that or a Trump Campaign rally broke out in a fight. I dont know which came first. A trump supporter grabbed a protester by the neck and tried to hit him in the face. Thanks got so violent some people thought they were at a taping of dancing with the stars. [ laughter ] donald trump of all the strange things hes done, and hes done a lot of strange things over the but its up there with the best of them. This is how he started his speech yesterday in asheville, North Carolina. . There aint no doubt i love this man . . God bless the usa . [ laughter ] jimmy i think he fondled the flag [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy say what you want about donald trump that man really loves america. So after the flagfondling, he pulled off an interesting stunt. This weekend at a fundraiser Hillary Clinton called half of Donald Trumps supporters a basket of deplorables. Which happens to be the leastpopular item in the harry and david catalog. Later she tried to walk the deplorable comment back. But while she was walking, she collapsed and had to be carried into her van. Trump made a big deal out of this. And decided to bring some of his the world just how undeplorable they are. My wife and i represent nondeplorable people. I am probably a lot of things. Deplorable is not one of them, i assure you. Do i look deplorable . No. What . Im up here because he gave me a hat. [ laughter ] jimmy sometimes thats all donald trump seemed to be gaining momentum lately, so weve decided to slow him down to half speed in tonights especially hammered edition of drunk donald trump. [ playing tape very slowly ] she even made her 13 different phones disappear and some of them she hammered. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy we have to take a break. When we come back, we ask kids to tell us how babies are made. And they did. So stick around. Well be right back. [ cheers and applause ] . Bonejangles met his match. Y of how mr. Mr. Bonejangles was always looking for something. But he never found it. Until one day. Seven in dog time. Exactly what he didnt know he was looking for fell right in his lap. Was he expecting the perfect toy at an amazing price . No, of course not, hes a dog. But thats the beauty of a store full of surprises. You never know what youre gonna find, but you know youre gonna love it. Marshalls. Your surprise is waiting. In a world that needs a hero, justice is spelled box. Say hello to a powerful tool that gives you options to fit your budget. . . Dundundaaaa i dont know that an insurancethemed comic book is what were looking for. Did i mention he can save people nearly 600 . You havent even heard my catchphrase. Im all done with this guy. Box him up. Thats terrible. Ill have that goat cheese garden salad. That gentleman got the last one. Sir, you give me that salad and i will pay for your movie and one snack box. Can i keep the walnuts . He genre . Yes, but it has to be a comedy. A little cash back on the side. With the blue cash everyday card from American Express, you get cash back on purchases with no annual fee. Throw. Its more than cash back. Its backed by the service and security of American Express. Its more than cash back. . . . . The new ford escape. Life is a sport. We are the utility. Be unstoppable. Scalpel. I have no idea what im doing. Im just a tv doctor. I never went to college. scream i dont do blood. But now, thanks to cigna, we are the tv doctors of america. And were partnering with cigna to help save lives. By getting you to a real doctor for an annual checkup. So go, know, and take control of your health. Doctor poses. Cigna. Together, all the way. Over 20,000 nevadans rely on planned parenthood for access to basic Health Services and critical cancer screenings. But congressman heck voted to defund planned parenthood congressman heck is whats wrong with washington. Dscc is responsible for the content of this advertising. Jimmy hello, welcome back to the show. Patrick dempsey, dr. Justin schmitt, music from tame impala on the way. This is something every student and anyone whos been a student already knows, but they did a study about it anyway. According to a new international study, children made sex ed, school. Did you take sex ed . Guillermo yes, high school. Jimmy did you already know everything beforehand . Guillermo only a little bit. [ laughter ] jimmy only a little bit. You found it educational . Guillermo i did, yeah. Jimmy who taught it who you . Guillermo i think mr. Castillo. Jimmy did he do a demonstration of any kind . Guillermo yeah, he had one of those plastic you know. Female vagina. And, you know. So [ laughter ] jimmy the female vagina . Guillermo yeah. [ laughter ] jimmy youve not to make sure you have the female vagina or the kids will get anyways, most kids hate sex ed, who wants to sit there with your friends like a p. E. Teacher puts a condom on a banana . If you want to communicate with teenagers you have to speak their language, and their language is primarily emojis. Heres how from now on well please join me at the wall of america. Put the emojis up on the wall. When a man and a woman or a boy and a girl love each other very much the man puts his eggplant into the womans doughnut and then two minutes later rolls over and falls asleep. [ laughter ] meanwhile, at that time the boys sperm swims to the girls egg. Like ryan lochte but smarter. [ laughter ] and fertilizes that egg. And then they wait nine months. And at the end of nine months they panic and run to the hospital. And then one of these comes out of the doughnut. And they never fall over and go to sleep again. [ laughter ] any questions . [ cheers and applause ] you know, instead of adults teaching kids about sex, i think it would be less empairsing if kids learned it from other kids. Afternoon and asked kids how babies are made. And we are very proud now to present the results of that inquiry for your education and pleasure. Where do babies come from . Ladies tummies. The ladies eat the babies . No they just get pregnant. How are babies made . Um into the girls downstairs. Do you know where babies come from . , a, b, c, d, e, f, g how are babies made . Babes. From babes . Theyre from boobs. How are babies made . When moms and dad makes love. What kind of loser makes do you know where babies come from . H, i, j, k, l, m, n, o, p how are babies made . Why is it so funny . Its weird. Whats weird about it . Knowing that my parents have to do it. Where do babies come from . Uh uh explain to him. Their mom their mom . Tummy. I dont know. You dont know . Explain to him how it works. Me . Yeah. Uh like they come out of the vagina i dont know. Who down how babies are made . Yes. How . . Baa baa black sheep have you any wool . Gross. Um why is it gross . Because. Its its eh, health. What do you mean, health . Im not in fifth grade yet, i shouldnt know this stuff. Whats so gross . Um just where it comes from. Ive seen star wars. And it looks really gross and painful. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy i must have missed that part of star wars. But thank you, kids. Tonight music from tame impala. Dr. Justin schmitt is here with bugs. Well be right back with Patrick Dempsey [ cheers and applause ] . Dicky portions of Jimmy Kimmel Live brought to you by aflac. Health can change but the life you love doesnt have to. Like rising copays and deductibles. Aflac or help pay the mortgage . Or child care . Aflaaac and everyday expenses . Aflac learn about one day pay at aflac. Com boat blurlbrlblrlbr whatcha got there . New cheezit sandwich crackers made with real cheese ummmm. Sammiches sandwich with a d sandwich Sammich Sammich see ahahaha we take time for our cheese to mature, in our new cheezit sandwich crackers. Sammiches. foot steps . crickets chirping . jet engine . heart beat . engine revving tires on wet road its halloween time my frightful fiends, and disneyland is ours going down boo halloween time at the Disneyland Resort means theres wicked fun in both parks. And make sure to see the Twilight Zone tower of terror before its final check out. Jimmy hi, there. Tonight on the show, the author of this book called the sting of the wild. This guy stung himself with more than 80 insects, and wrote a book about it. His name is dr. Justin schmidt. He brought stinging bugs and them into our studio audience, ought to be fun. Then, from perth, which is now in australia, their latest album is called currents, tame impala from the samsung outdoor stage. Sunday night on abc, im hosting the 68s annual emmy awards. [ cheers and applause ] we have been working very hard on this and have many fun moments planned. Guillermo, who will you be wearing to the emmys . Guillermo whatever my assistant pick for me. Jimmy you have an assistant . Guillermo rodney. Jimmy rodney is your assistant . You have no input into what youre going to wear . Guillermo i let him choose. Jimmy wow, you have a lot of confidence and trust. You know our first guest from that show with the doctors and the movie where he couldnt buy himself love. Next, he returns to the big screen in Bridget Joness baby. Okay, im here im here. I got this. Thank you. I got this. Okay. Okay. Easy jesus take her, take her got her, got her. Dont drop her jimmy Bridget Joness baby opens in theaters friday. Please welcome Patrick Dempsey [ cheers and applause ] . Thank you jimmy very good to see you. Calm down, you animals. Calm down or well release the swarm of bees right now where are they . I hope you dont mind me saying, you look more handsome than thank you. Jimmy how have you been . Everything all right . Been busy. Been traveling the world, promoting the movie. Jimmy can i tell you something weird, watching that clip i thought, that must be the most beautiful bridge ive ever seen. Gorgeous. Jimmy where was that . It was in london. Jimmy in london. I believe its Prince Albert bridge. Jimmy does it always look like that . It always looks like that. Jimmy thats something else. I had a great time on that. It was nice just to be outside, not in a sound stage. Jimmy i would think so, yeah. Beautiful. Jimmy it is nice. They close down the bridge . Shut jimmy are you the father of Bridget Jones baby . Youve got to see the movie. [ laughter ] jimmy is that part of it . Thats part of it. Jimmy then what, maury povich bursts in at the end . Dont give it away. Its supposed to an surprise. Jimmy i ruin everything. Yeah, i know. He was great to work with, amazing. Jimmy how old is your daughter . 14. Jimmy 14 years old. Old enough to see this film . Yes. Well. Yes. Jimmy she is . We went to the premiere so she is. Technically. Jimmy did something bad happen . The subject matter, in certain places i was a little nervous. More nervous than she was. Jimmy you must have been more nervous than she was. Yeah, theres you with Bridget Jones and shes like, what the hell is this . Right, yes. There are other movies that yes. You know. Shes a freshman in high school. Jimmy she went to sex ed . Yeah, they talk about all that stuff. Jimmy they did, good. How old are your boys . My boys are 9,000. Jimmy they did not see the film, im guessing . In england theyre too young to go to see the film, so we had a private screening at the hotel. Jimmy for them . Right. They lasted about ten minutes and checked out. They didnt get the movie at all. But theyre here today. They missed soccer practice to see you. Jimmy oh, really, wow. Theyre big fans of your show. Jimmy thats the heart of my core audience. Your core demographic, 10 and below. Thats good, strong. Jimmy youre their soccer coach . I hope so. Coach. Ive been missing games. Jimmy its hard to have an acting job and be the regular coach. The games this weekend, ill be there for that. Jimmy what kind of coach are you . Passionate. Jimmy screamy . Extremely. [ cheers and applause ] thank you. I have to say that. Jimmy im going to tell your sons to spread that one around. I get very passionate, certainly. Jimmy do you . Do you yell . I try not to. Jimmy do you have arguments with other parent in not the parents, the referees every now and then. Jimmy really. Yes. Jimmy is it weed for them . Theyre not quite sure. Jimmy how old are the referees . All under the age of 15. [ laughter ] i feel that my age and my presence, i can intimidate them to get the call in the direction that i would like. Jimmy does that work at all . Not at all. No. Jimmy have you ever been thrown out of a game . Close. Jimmy yeah . Thats embarrassing. It is. Jimmy getting thrown out by a teenager. It goes to show you. Jimmy what happened . You had words . Well, sometimes they dont call offsides and you get a little upset. Jimmy i see. One kid camps out down by the goal and the games going on up here. Jimmy it ruins the game. It is, and you want to teach the fundamentals. Im exactly like that. You yell . Jimmy i try not to yell. More i spread the yelling out. But yeah. I was not a good Little League coach parent in general, yeah. Its funny how you get kind of left field, and id stand there and coach my son while he was playing. Shockingly, he gave up the sport very quickly. [ laughter ] yeah. I understand that now. Jimmy when you are coaching these kids, do you ever fool around with them . Like do you make jokes or any of that kind of thing . I try to keep it fun so they enjoy it. Jimmy i found thats a big mistake. Really . Try and be more palestinianed . Jimmy i started with jokes and they thought, this is to listen to anything he says. Right. This is why we have a team of coaches. Jimmy i see. Insulate you from that kind of thing. This is a photo from a magazine ca called haute living. I know, yes. Jimmy i must know, are you really doing that . What do you think . Jimmy i dont know with you. You drive race cars. Youre not averse to risk im not half. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] photoshopping. Jimmy is it . From here. That was it. Jimmy where were you . In front of a green screen . A green screen. Jimmy they told you to do this and you said yes . Thats what i do in malibu. Jimmy oh, its a good thing you didnt get stung by a bee at that moment. Thats why my toe is pointed. Jimmy its very good to see you. Its been too long. Its great to see you. Patrick dempsey, Bridget Joness baby opens in theaters friday. Well be right back. [ cheers and applause ] . Dicky portions of Jimmy Kimmel Live brought to you by aflac. Health can change but the life you love doesnt have to. Hold onto your forks. Endless shrimp is back at red lobster. That means you get to try as much as you want. Of whatever flavors are calling your name. Seriously. Like new garlic srirachagrilled shrimp. Its a little spice. A little sizzle. And a lot just right. And try new parmesan peppercorn shrimp. And the classic. Handcrafted shrimp scampi. You cant get enough of . Still gonna floor you. It may be called endless. But that doesnt mean itll last. Woah youre not taking these. Hey, hey, hey youre not taking those. Woah, woah youre not taking that. Come with me. Youre not taking that. Youre not taking that. Youre not taking that. Mom, im taking the subaru. Dont be late. Our Subaru Outback will be. vo love. Its what makes a subaru, a subaru. . . You guys ever try one of these bars made over at right twix . Why . Our special cookie is cascaded with caramel and cloaked in chocolate. You never wondered . [ whoosh zap ] [ glass breaks ] aah [ male announcer ] try both. Pick a side. Twix. [ male announcer ] try both. If you have moderate to severe rheumatoid arthritis, this is humira helping to relieve my pain and protect my joints from further damage. This is humira helping me go further. Humira works for many adults. It targets and helps to block a specific source of inflammation that contributes to ra symptoms. Humira has been clinically studied for over 18 years. Humira can lower your ability to fight infections, including tuberculosis. Serious, sometimes fatal infections and cancers, including lymphoma, have happened, as have blood, liver and nervous system problems, and new or worsening heart failure. Before treatment, get tested for tb. Tell your doctor if youve been to areas where certain fungal infections are common, and if youve had tb, hepatitis b, are prone to infections, or have flulike symptoms or sores. Dont start humira if you have an infection. Ready for a new chapter . Talk to your rheumatologist. Why are you deleting these photos . Because my teeth are yellow. Why dont you use a whitening toothpaste . Y crest 3d white. Crest 3d White Diamond strong toothpaste and rinse. Gently whiten. And fortify weak spots. . Welcome back to the show. Dr. Justin schmidt and tame impala are on the way. But first, as the leading provider of supplemental insurance, aflac has been helping people protect their lifestyle for years. But many young people dont know why they need it. So we sent our pal guillermo undercover as a millennial to spread the word. Guillermo hello, my name is hash tag and i want to tell all the millennials like me that supplemental insurance is total radical. Radical my name is hash tag. Your names hash tag . Yeah. What happen if youre at the froyo festival and you sprain your tongue . I dont know, what . Aflac will give you money to help pay your bills. Okay. Isnt that dope . Pretty dope, ive got to get some aflac. Get you some aflac, thats right. Awesome. Internet router. Okay. Thats so dope wifi look, its a millennial like me, hi. What happen if you break your legs while youre shopping online . Who how do you break your legs shopping online . Did you know aflac will pay you if you get hurt . By breaking your legs shopping online . Right. How yolo are you right now . How yolo am i . Yes. Skateboard. He said skateboard hey, millennials. Aflac covers sick or hurt. Who wants to take an instasnap . Yeah, man, sure. All right, ready . Aflac aflac dont worry, aflac has me covered dicky for more wisdom from guillermo go to aflac. Com backstage. Jimmy be right back with dr. C isnt Major Medical enough . No whos gonna help cover the holes in their plans . Aflac like rising copays and deductibles. Aflac or help pay the mortgage . Or child care . Aflaaac and everyday expenses . Aflac learn about one day pay at aflac. Com boat blurlbrlblrlbr . Parents. You ignored every piece of advice. You failed over, and over, and over. And look where it got you. Hold onto your forks. Endless shrimp is back at red lobster. That means you get to try as much as you want. Of whatever flavors are calling your name. Seriously. Like new garlic srirachagrilled shrimp. Its a little spice. A little sizzle. And a lot just right. Ppercorn shrimp. Helloooo crispy goodness. And the classic. Handcrafted shrimp scampi. You cant get enough of . Still gonna floor you. It may be called endless. But that doesnt mean itll last. Hahaha umhmmm hey nikki what are you doing here . You tell me, stephen. What . Youve been streaming my videos all morning. Now youre with this thing . No its not you its verizon th unlimited data. Why pay verizon more for data limits . Introducing tmobile one. One price. Unlimited data for everyone. We are a military family. They travel a lot. Every four years when we got restationed you think its going to be the biggest change in your life but theres always more changes to come. The first thing that we would do when we would get into our new place was set up the beds. And when i go to t. J. Maxx i buy good quality things that are going to last a long time. I get at a lower price. Shopping at t. J. Maxx is always like a bonding experience. Discover real value worth sharing. I just think that home, its wherever your family is. Maxx life at t. J. Maxx. Hello. Hi. Welcome. This is the chevy malibu. It was awarded most dependable midsize car by j. D. Power. It looks great. Wow what is happening . Oh my gosh, its going up the chevy camaro, equinox, and silverado hd were awarded most dependable as well. This is extremely impressive. Theres so many doing it once, yea, great job, four times, obviously, theyre doing something right. Absolutely for a tv show. Sous chef. Lawyer by day, prepcook by night. Also, his name is sous. No. Sloppy joseph. A middleaged man whos trying to get his life together, but he cant hes to sloppy. Huhhh no here you go. I got this. I get cash back so its like everythings on sale. With the blue cash everyday card from American Express you get cash back on purchases with no annual fee. Everythings on sale a Home Shopping show takes place on a sailboat. Thats the one banana boat dessert on me. Look at you being all lactose tolerant. Its more than cash back. Jimmy welcome back. Our next guest is probably the first entomologist weve had on the show. Hes been stung by many insects, and he is here now to explain why. His book is called the sting of the wild. Please welcome dr. Justin schmidt [ cheers and applause ] . Jimmy thanks for youve got a bug on your shirt. Do you love bugs . Who doesnt . Doesnt everybody love bugs . Were going to make you a fine entom molt by the time were done. Jimmy im scared when we have big animals but im not that scared of bugs. Youre already an animal, just like me, im afraid of horses. Jimmy you are . Big. Have you ever seen the teeth on a horse . Jimmy they do have bigger teeth than your typical insect. Thats for sure. They bite a lot harder too. Jimmy can i ask you a quick personal question. I dont know what it is but i get bitten by mosquitos more than if im in a group, ill get 10 times the amount of mosquito bites as anybody else. Why is that . Youre a hotblooded american. Jimmy yes. They like people that are hot, particularly women. Jimmy really . Yeah. I dont know, maybe youre attractive. Jimmy theser horny little mosquitos. Exactly. Jimmy im only attractive to mosquitos though. Ohoh. Jimmy youve been stung by how many . How many insects exactly . I dont know, probably 83 plus or minus a few here and there. Jimmy how does it work . More than any fingers and toes, i cant keep track. Jimmy what part of your body do you let them sting . They sting wherever they choose. Jimmy i see. If i had my choice id like them to sting me in the arm or the leg. Not my nose or my lip or my eye. Jimmy has it happened that theyve stung your nose, lip or eyes . Oh, yes. I cant speak right now, my lips big and fat. Jimmy are these controlled experiments . Or are you out in the wild and get stung and write the experience down . Its pretty much in the wild. I think the only control is the wasp or the ant. Jimmy i see. Not me. Im not in control usually. Jimmy i see. Im just there trying to do my thing. Jimmy youve made a chart which is called you named it after you, the schmitt pain index. Who uses this chart . How did this come in theres lots of practical uses. Educators, to teach the children about the beauty of nature. Its really good for medical things so we can figure out, oh, boy, this really hurts but can we use this for stopping the pain . Jimmy so the honeybee, the sweat bee, the honeybee, is that the same thing . A sweat bee is a little tiny grayish bee. This feels kind of like a spark. Youre walking on the carpet and touch your finger to the light switch . It doesnt hurt very much, just enough to get your attention. The honeybee, thats a 2. The sweat bee is 1. Jimmy how many are there . 1 through 4. The 2 is the anchor, the honeybee. Jimmy the bull horn, acacia ant, it feels like someone fired a staple into your cheek or hand . Exactly. Jimmy have you had a staple fired into your cheek or hand . I had one once. I had my hand underneath the stapler and wha got me that impression. Jimmy yellow jacket. Feels like extinguishing a cigar on your tongue. You definitely havent had that . No, i hope not. Jimmy so how do you know it feels like that . You dont. But you kind of imagine if thats what it was, thats good enough. Jimmy you just imagine by the way, i was attacked by a swarm of yellow jackets. I heard. Jimmy when i was a kid, i was about 8 years old, in brooklyn i jumped over a fence and my sister, both of us. We landed an old steak, a piece of meat somebody threw into a yard. I was swarmed. They chased me down the block. You were trying to steal their dinner was the problem. Jimmy thats right. I got stung 11 times. My uncle tony went out in the backyard and started bringing dirt up to the bathtub and they filled the tub with mud. Was that a good thing to do . Sure, that works. Jimmy it does . By the way, you got a sting rather than a 2, which is 1 yellow jacket, that makes it a 3. Because 1 and 2 is 10. Jimmy i see. We have bugs here. We have this little box of dead bugs. Should we bring out the live bugs instead . The live bugs are more interesting. [ cheers and applause ] do we have those over there . Yeah, alec, did you want to be a part of that . What we have here, these are harvester ants. Jimmy right. As you kind of notice, theres red ones and black ones. Harvester ants. Which do you think hurts more . Jimmy i dont want to sound racist so ill say red. Very good. Weve got the correct answer. Jimmy thats correct, yeah. I would be more scared of the red ones. But they both hurt. Oh, yes. The difference is the black ones only hurt for four hours. Jimmy okay. If you imagine you get stung, imagine somebody taking needle nose pliers and digging underneath your skin, grabbing tendons and nerves and ripping at them, for about four hours. Thats the black its a 3. The red one, you get the red one, it goes on eight hours. You get the bonus, no extra charge. Jimmy i see. Did you bring these on the plane from tucson . Oh, yeah, of course. Jimmy you did . I cant bicycle fast enough to get here from tucson in time. Jimmy you checked these . I said im with insect zoo coming on the jimmy kimmel show, and everybody says wow, of course thats legitimate. [ laughter ] jimmy yeah. All right. These are some of my favorites. Jimmy what are these . These we call the jesus christ wasps. Jimmy when people see them they go, jesus christ thats one reason. Theyll feel it if they get stung. The other reason is theyre like a helicopter, they land in the middle and go buzzzz, land, tank up with water, and up. Jimmy just like jeelss usus to. [ laughter ] its a lot safer than being on the edge with things that are going to eat you. Jimmy these arent going to get out, are they . We can open the jar. Jimmy no. Doesnt the audience want to see them in the air . Theyre very flightworthy. Jimmy im sure theyre great, yeah, well take your word for that. What else do you have . These guys in contrast to the other ones jimmy youve been stung by this . Unfortunately, yes. Jimmy oh, boy. Would you like to take a look at them . Jimmy no, no, no jimmy yeah, no i dont. Look how beautiful. Jimmy what if they fly out . These arent very acrobatic. Jimmy famous last words. You can stick your hand in and pet them if you want to. Jimmy no, no, no. No . Jimmy yeah im just go ahead slide those over there. What are these . These are tarantula hawks. They eat tarantulas. Jimmy oh, wow. Oh, good. Good job, guys [ laughter ] pet than this is. Jimmy it is . A tarantula wont bite. Jimmy bad job, guys. Gals, by the way. Jimmy ive insulted them, great, the guys are nice, sweet, loveable characters. You have one more for us . This is the one that along electric freaked out about. This is a vinegaroon. Jimmy why are they called vinegaroon . They spray vinegar. These smell a little bit like that. Oh, yum want to eat them. Jimmy this is going to spray me if i hold it . Probably not. [ laughter ] here. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy which side do they spray from . Youre looking at the [ laughter ] you better be in Good Behavior or else shes going to let you know. Jimmy dont worry, im not going to move a millimeter. See, youre already getting converted, well make you an entomologist soon. Jimmy i doubt it but thank you very much, doctor. Dr. Justin schmidt here from tucson promoting the book, the sting of the wild. They do smell like vinegar. Well be right back with music dicky the Jimmy Kimmel LiveConcert Series is presented by samsung. Jimmy id like to thank Patrick Dempsey, Justin Schmidt and bugs. And apologize to matt damon we ran out of time. Nightline is next but first their album is called currents, here with the song the less i know the better, tame impala . . . Someone said they left together i ran out the door to get her . . She was Holding Hands with trevor feeling ever . . Said, pull yourself together you should try your luck with heather . . Then i heard they slept together oh, the less i know the better . . The less i know the better oh my love, cant you see yourself by my side no surprise when youre . . On his shoulder like every night oh my love, cant you see that youre on my mind . . Dont suppose we could to change his mind so goodbye . . She said, its not now or never wait ten years well be together . . I said, better late than never just dont make me wait forever . Dont make me wait forever oh my love, cant you see yourself by my side . . I dont suppose you could convince your lover to change his mind . . I was doing fine til i saw your face now i cant erase . . Giving in to all his [ bleep ] is this what you want is this who you are . . I was doing fine without ya til i saw your eyes turn away from mine . . Oh, sweet darling where he wants you said, come on superman say your stupid line . . Said, come on superman say your stupid line . This is nightline. Tonight, Jonbenet Ramseys brother breaking his silence. I was scared, i think. Speaking out to dr. Phil about the night his 6yearold sister was murdered. His Family Living under a cloud of suspicion but cleared by prosecutors. New crime scene video and revelations from his interrogation. 20 years later the question remains, who killed a beauty Queen Jon Benet . Fullfigured fashion. Christian soriano breaking the bold, featuring plussize models in his runway show. Why he says most designers arent measuring up when it comes to clothing american women. So quells are often a little tortured. But this is down right masochistic. The new trailer for 50 shades