Boy, i bet those beehives are just full of honey, arent they, opie . I wish they was. This late spring has got us messed all up. The late spring . Yeah, the clover aint bloomi and the fruit trees aint either. You know what, boys . Theres hardly enough honey around to keep the bees eatin. Well, if the bees cant find anything to eat, whatll they do . Its kinda hard to tell. Sometime, they just swarm up and leave. Leave . You mean for good . Opie yup. I might even have to leave with em, move to the country or someplace. Jeepers, opie, dont move away. Me and tommy will help, wont we, tommy . Well help the bees find honey. Sure, we will. How . Well, maybe find some new flowers for em or somethin. Yeah. We got flowers in our yard. Thats right. And mr. Wilsons got a yard full of flowers, opie. Two spoonsful for this one hey, theres good old mr. Wilson feeding the camellias their lunch. Hello, mr. Wilson. Why do they have to bother me now . Hi, mr. Wilson. Taking your nerve medicine . Thats what it is, all right. It smells awful, dont it . Yeah, he makes that stuff himself, dont you, mr. Wilson . Hey, mr. Wilson, you wanna play football with us . Yes, id love to play football with you, dennis. Swell. Catch. Did you see him catch that ball, tommy . Boy, youd make a swell allamerican, mr. Wilson. You hear me . Lets keep it over in your own yard. Ooh. Oh, my goodness. Whatoh, what did i oh, my. Dennis, is this your football . Sure, dad. You gave it to me for christmas, dont you remember . Well, if you cant watch where youre throwing, im gonna put it away. You nearly knocked my head off. Besides, you could have broken my glasses. Anyone who throws a football without looking where hes throwing it mitchell, im terribly sorry, but dennis did not throw that. I did. You . Ii dont know what to say. I know it was a very foolish thing to do. Boy, ill say. You could have knocked his head off. Yeah, and you might have busted his glasses. Yes, i know. Ino harm done, mr. Wilson. You should never throw a football without looking, mr. Wilson, because you might all right, dennis, thats enough. Run out and play. Isay, these are beautiful camellias. Are they new . Oh, this is my experiment here, mitchell. This is a crossbreeding of the best camellias ive raised in the last five years. Well, youve raised a lot of em. It must be a fascinating hobby. Oh, yes. Yes, sir. Some exciting things can happen sometimes with this crossbreeding. You never know. But you said you needed advice. Oh, yes. One of the men in our office is retiring and weve all chipped in together to buy him some garden equipment. I thought maybe you could advice me what i shoo. Oh, these bees, pesky things are getting to be a nuisance around here. Shoo. Darn bees. Jeepers, mr. Wilson, dont hit em. Theyre opie swansons bees. Theyre opie swanson . Opie swansons got some beehives. Theyre having a hard enough time trying to find honey without people hitting them. Well, gee, when they get all the honey out of mr. Wilsons flowers, opie is gonna give me some. Well, if theyre gathering honey for you, dennis, its all right. They can use my flowers. Gee, thanks, mr. Wilson. [music] boy, it sure is a good thing we looked in the house. Ill say it was. Theres enough flowers here for a barrel of honey. You dont think mrs. Wilson will get mad, do you . Heck, no. Mrs. Wilson loves kids and bees and besides, shes been seeing her mother in iowa. Oh. Mr. Wilsons sister is keeping house for him, and she wont mind either, and mr. Wilson said we could use his flowers. Thats what he said all right. Bees. Duck. Boy, the bees sure are glad about us bringing those flowers out. Theyre buzzing all around them. Hmm. You know what theyre not buzzing around . Those camellias. Look at that. They dont even go near em. Maybe they havent got any honey in em. Oh, i bet these big, fat camellias are just busting with honey. Say, i bet i know why the bees dont try em. They dont smell like anything. Youre right. They dont smell at all. If they smelled good like the honeysuckle and stuff, i bet the bees would go for em, all right. Sure they would. Hey, i got it, tommy. I know exactly what to do. Yeah. Come on. [music] ohh, thats no good. Boy, when i get through with those camellias, theyll smell sweller than any flower in town. It takes a lot of stuff to make your mom pretty. It does not. My mom was born pretty. She doesnt need all this stuff. Why does she buy it then . She just likes to spend money, thats why. My dad said so. My dad says that, too. He says mom is gonna send him to the poorhouse someday. Well, when my dad goes to the poorhouse, my mom will probably go with him, i bet. They go every place together. Hey, this smells good. Maybe the bees would like this. No, thats not perfume, anyhow. Thats called hairlocker. Hairlocker . Mom uses it to lock her hair down, so the wind wont blow it. Its the only thing we got thatll hold this down. Want me to give it a squirt . Heck, no. It makes my head feel puckery. Hey, i know just the stuff, tommy. [music] boost me up, will you, tommy . Mom said shes gonna throw this stuff away, but it smells real pretty. I bet the bees will go for this all right. I would if i was a bee. I bet theyll come zoomin right at those camellias when they smell this. [music] plenty of bees around here, all right. These oughta show em where the honey is. That smells good. It smells kinda like my grandpas apple trees. cause thats exactly what this perfume is apple blossom. Bees like apple blossoms. Sure, they do. Hey, look. Here comes one now. Hey, theres lots of em. We better get out of here and give em room cause we dont wanna make em nervous. No, sir, cause theres nothing worser than a nervous bee. Come on. I certainly appreciate your help, mr. Wilson. You really hammered merivales prices down for me. Oh, i always drive a good bargain with old merivale. Hes tighter than a short shoe, but he never makes a dime on me. Well, youre a tough dealer. Gee, your garden smells good. Yes. Hmm. Natures own perfume. Lovely. Well, thanks again. Ill be seeing you. Ah, see you later, mitchell. Oh, sis. Oh, sis. Are you home . I just got home, george. What is it . Oh, come out. Smell the garden. The flowers have never been better. They do smell sweet. Hmm. What a variety of fragrance. Smell that honeysuckle and those roses . Mmhmm, but, you know, the strongest odor seems to come from these camellias over here. Oh, your nose is mixed up, sis. Oh, camellias dont have any odor. Oh, that doesnt have any odor, huh . Oh, they may have a little springy smell, some of them, but no special fragrance. This is my own experiment here, these plants, you know . Ive been crossbreeding these and i they do have a fragrance, beautiful fragrance. June, smell this. Wait, george, im the one who said they had an odor, remember . Why, they smell like apple blossoms, dont they . You know, i think they do at that. Why, this is yes. Theyre very nice, george. Very nice. Why, do you realize what ive got here . There isnt another camellia in the world like this. George, thats wonderful. What a triumph. Somehow ive crossed just the proper type to breed a fragrance into them. George wilson fragrant camellia. Thats a good name for them. Lovely. Why, every gardener in town will be excited about this. Theyll all want one of em, of course, ill every gardener in townwhy, every gardener in the country will be excited about this. Why, theres a fortune in it. But you havent got that many. All right, ill grow them or have them grown, acres of them. Oh, this thing has unlimited possibilities. Goodness. I didnt realize. Say, maybe ill let him handle em for me if he can come up with enough money. If not, theyll go to the highest bidder oh, june. Why, this is going to make horticultural history. [music] well, merivale, are you satisfied now . By golly, wilson, i cant believe it. A fragrant camellia. Its aits sensational . Well, lets just say its a bit unusual. Oh, no. Lets say sensational. Worth more money that way. Well, i probably could make a few dollars with them if we handle them right. You see, its not easy to why, merivale, you old fraud. Why, i could get 100 a piece for these plants right now and you know it. Oh, well, now, wilson, you dont well go in and talk. If not [music] well, i hope youre not gonna be too hard to deal with now, wilson. Weve been friends a long time. Friends . Oh, say, if i didnt keep my mouth closed tight every time i deal with you, you wouldve had my back teeth long ago. Oh, please, dont heckle me, wilson. Ive had a bad day. Good for you. To top it all off, that neighbor kid of yours has been twice today just pestering me to death. Dennis . Well, what did he want . Oh, something about the flowers and honey, and would i leave the hothouse windows open so the bees could come in at night. Oh, that confounded kid. [laughs] well, you just relax, merivale. Now, you sit there and figure out your best deal on those camellias, then double it. [music] there he is, tommy. Hi, mr. Merivale. We saw your truck outside. Were you looking for us . I certainly wasnt. Have you changed your mind yet . Are you gonna leave the windows open so the bees can get to the swell flowers in the nursery . Oh, of course not. Thats ridiculous. Now, you boys run along. Mr. Wilson and i are talking business. Boy, you must have to talk pretty loud. Mr. Wilsons not even here. Hes in the kitchen. Will you leave one window open . The bees can get in one window. No, i will not leave one window open. Ioh. [music] hey, would you like a banana . Mr. Wilson wouldnt mind. No, thanks. Yes, but i cant eat them today. Ive got a nervous stomach. You have . Tommys cats the same way. Yeah, if you scratch his stomach, he bites. Mr. Merivale, if somebody scratches your stomach, do you bite . Kids, for heavens sake. Dont you want me to talk about it . No. Dont ever talk to anybody about mr. Merivales stomach, tommy. Now, thats enough, boys. You get out of here. Go and bother somebody else. Okay. All right, merivale, time for another one. There now. You feeling better . Yeah. Thanks, wilson. Much better. I say, look at that hand. That nerve medicine took the shake right out of it. Oh, those kids. Yeah, i know. Yes, they used to bother me too, but this is my secret weapon. Mmhmm. Whered you buy it . Oh, this stuff cannot be bought. I make it myself. Make it yourself, huh . Oh, by the gallon. And old indian guide gave me the recipe many years ago. Well, here, take it along with you. Be my guest. Well, fine, fine. Thanks. Well, wilson, now, about those camellias oh. The i tell you i was excited as a kid about this. Why, theres no telling how much money we can make. Oh my, that is exciting. Thats wonderful, mr. Wilson. Of course, its too big for merivale to handle by himself, but hes got this retired millionaire who he thinks might finance us. Outside banking. Good. Of course, merivale says hes a crotchety old codger, but hes loaded with money and hes willing to invest it in anything that he can make more money with. My goodness. One of these days you may turn into a regular luther [music] i left the camellia with him last night. He said hed be here for lunch at 1 00 today. Well, its almost 1 00 now. Well, hell be here. Now, look, wilson, like i told you, stacy is a peculiar old duffer with a very snappish temper, so you better let me do the talking. Oh, fiddlefaddle. He doesnt intimidate me. Well, he was in a foul humor last night when i got out there, mad at the chauffeur or somebody. Fact is, i wound up leaving that bottle of nerve medicine of yours. Say, where are the rest of the camellias . You got more than this. Oh, i put them out there behind the house. I want to see if the sun has any effect on their fragrance these are okay, tommy. They still smell swell. Yup, the bees are finding them all right, see . Yeah, it sure was a good thing i came over here early this morning though. These flowers didnt have one single smell on em. Not any of em . No, sir. Right before breakfast. Now, so therell be no misunderstanding, wilson. Lets go over our agreement again before stacy gets here. Oh, good heavens, merivale, i know it by heart. If stacy wants to put up the money, we give him 40 percent of the deal. That leaves 60 percent 40 for me, 20 for you. Well, i think it ought to be even steven with you and me, wilson. Well, okay, 40 20. Well, naturally, ill be president of the company. Excuse me, mr. Wilson. Could you move your chair a little bit . Oh, my chair. Oh, yes, of course. And i suppose stacy will probably want to be the treasurer. So you candennis, what are you doing . What do you boys want anyhow . We dont want anything. Thank you. Were just putting some perfume on the camellias again. Ohyou what . You must have missed this one this morning, dennis. It doesnt smell like anything. I meandid you sure. Weve been perfuming all of em so the bees would find them and get the honey. Ii thought i oh, no. You and your fragrant camellias. Ha. The only thing about this whole deal that doesnt smell is your camellias. Mr. Wilson, mr. Wilson, camellias dont smell like anything if you dont put perfume on em. You know that. Dennis, home. Home. George, your visitors here. Oh, come on out, sir. Thank you. Mr. Wilson, im mark stacy. How are you, sir . Oh, how are you stacy. How are you, merivale . Well, i wont waste time, mr. Wilson. Youve got a great thing here. Id like to talk business. Well, mr. Stacy, theres been a terrible mistake. Great scott, merivale, say something. Oh, oh. Well, wilson claimed the i mean, he sorry we bothered you. Bothered me . Well, i dont quite know how to say this. But you see, the the camellias arent true, mr. Stacy. I mean, they just arent so. I mean, they dont camellias, that thing. That confounded potted plant caused my wife an allergy. I havent seen her sneeze like that in years. But ii thought you wanted to talk business. I do. I want to talk about this wonderful nerve medicine. My nerve medicine . Yes, sir, i took some of that last night and my nerves havent been calmer in 20 years. You sell me that formula on a royalty basis, and were in business, mr. Wilson. Well, ill be darned. My old nerve medicine. Yes, sir, theres a lot of money in that. What do you say . By golly, gentlemen, this calls for a toast. Oh, mr. Wilson, can we have some too . Oh, dennis, young boys dont need nerve medicine. Oh, its not for us, mr. Wilson. Its only for the bees. Theyre getting awful nervous. Well, all right, dennis. If it hadnt been for you boys, this good fortune wouldnt have happened. Ill give you a whole bottle. A whole bottle . Well, gentlemen, our toast. Heres to mr. Wilsons nerve medicine, good for what ails man and beast and bees. [music] [music] tell dennis ill bring him a present from chicago. Hell be so disappointed he didnt get a chance to say goodbye. I hate it what on earth . Dennis. Oh. Boy, it worked. Oh, dennis. Why on earth did you do a thing like that . Its a Burglar Alarm for while dads away on his trip. All i do is tie this string i see. But i dont think you have to worry about burglars. Besides, ill only be gone for two or three days. Yeah, but mom gets scared at night. Itll be okay, mom. cause if any crooks run into my Burglar Alarm, ill come downstairs and hit em with something. Thats very nice of you, dear. But well talk about it later. Right now, your father has to get to the office. I thought he was going on a trip. I am, son, but ill spend most of the day in the office then ill take the train right from there. You got a train that goes from your office . Well, ill let your mother answer that question after im gone. [honking] the taxis here, honey. Bye, darling. Goodbye. Bye, son. You take good care of your mother, now. I sure will, dad. Good. Gee, honey, id give anything if i could be here for your birthday tomorrow. Oh, as i said before, dear, dont worry about it. These things cant be helped. Yeah, but you shouldnt be alone on your birthday. And this darned trip came up in such a hurry, i didnt have a chance to buy you a gift. You just take care of yourself. Thats the only gift i need. It is . Honey, you know what . I almost forgot my overcoat. Oh, ill get it. Son, ill send your mother some flowers from the office. A little present from you. Gee whiz, dad, thats only gonna be two presents for her. I know. But ill bring her a present from chicago. Now you see that she has a nice birthday, you know what i mean. Sure, dad. Thisll be the neatest birthday good old mom ever had. Good boy. Thank you, darling. [honking] i guess i better run. Bye, dear. Bye, dear. Dennis bye, dad. Goodbye, dear. [music] there, i got it. Theres your gum, tommy. How much money is that . Well, this is the dollar my dad gave me, and this is the dollar my grandpa sent me for having the chickenpox, and this nickel and these two pennies, i saved myself. Yeah. How many presents you think i could buy my mom with all this money, tommy . Youre gonna spend it all on her . Yeah. I wanna get a whole bunch of presents on account of its no fun just opening one. You think shed like it if i got her a candy bar for a present . Sure. You got a nickel . Uhuh. But i know where theres the pop bottle. Come on, tommy. [music] when johnny comes marching home again when johnny comes marching home again whos ththe . Its us, mr. Wilson. My only hope is someday, hell grow up and go away to college. What . Nothing. Now, you may not watch me paint, you may not help me paint, you may not test the paint to see if its wet. Gee, whyd mr. Wilson say all that . cause sometimes before you even ask him. Oh. All right, boys, im busy now. What do you want . We wanna ask you how we can get to some place. Some place away from here . Uhhuh. Well, fine. Im all ears. Gee, no, youre not, mr. Wilson. If youre all ears, you couldnt smell stuff. Yeah. Hah, yeah well, where do you wanna go . Well, tomorrows my moms birthday. And my dad went on a trip. So dennis is gonna give her the best birthday she ever had. Boy. Hmm. But we dont know where theres a Good Department store so we can buy the presents. Well, there are lots of em. Theres dennisons, laceys. Yeah, except, were not allowed to cross the street. Hmm. Well, that is a problem, isnt it . How about finchs . Well, actually its a drugstore but they have all kinds of gifts and you dont have to cross any streets to get there. Ill tell you how to get there. You just go right down to the next corner, turn right, go down another block, turn right again. Gee, that sure sounds a long ways off. Yeah. My mom cries if i get lost. And if i get lost, my mom wont have any birthday at all. All you do is turn two corners. How in the world could you possibly get lost . Real easy. Its up to you, dennis. Although it seems to me, i have seen you at finchs many times with your mother. Hey, is that the one with the yellow front to it, mr. Wilson . Yes. Thats the one. Oh, sure. I know how to get there. All you do is climb over to mr. Wilsons fence then you go down the alley, then you go through margarets yard yeah. And then you go through that ladys yard that has all them goofy cats. Yeah. And then you go through that mans driveway that always yells at kids and thats where the store is. Gee, thanks mr. Wilson. Well, now that youve simplified the trip, you better get started. Okay. Oh, can tommy have that pop bottle thats in your garage . Theoh, yes, i suppose so. Gee, thanks, mr. Wilson. Williams, i dont think i have to remind you about this birthday sale here comes trouble. Oh, arent they cute . Two small boys alone without their mother in a drugstore are not cute. Get rid of them. Maybe they wanna buy something. They never wanna buy anything. They come here for the express purpose of reading comics, breaking toys, and putting their sticky fingers on the merchandise. Mr. Finch dont touch that. I wouldnt touch the dummy if i were you, boys. Oh, we wouldnt have, lady. Only, we thought her arm was gonna fall off pretty soon. It kinda swings when people go by. It is a little loose. Makes her look alive, doesnt it . Yeah. Now, what can i do for you . Well, tomorrows my moms birthday, and i wanna get about 20 presents. My goodness. And dennis has to buy em all by himself cause his dad gypped her by going away on a trip. I see. But we gotta get em from a man named mr. Finch. Cause hes a friend of mr. Wilsons. Well, mr. Finch is right over there. Oh, and, dennis . Yes . If hes too busy, you come right back here to me. Okay. Hey, mr. Finch you might as well know that you cant take the comic books to the Soda Fountain unless you pay for them. We dont wanna look at comics, mister. I dont care what20 . Yes, sir. Have you got any money . I got so much money, sometimes, i think my pockets gonna bust loose. We got it out of his piggy bank, dollar bills and everything. I see. Well, exactly what have you got in mind, my boy . I dont kinda know yet. Can we look around . Of course. Hey, dennis, theres a neat stuff over there. Boy, yeah. May i suggest, young man, that you get rid of that filthy bottle somewhere. Okay, mister. Holy baloney, what a bunch of swell junk. Which ones you gonna get for your mom, dennis . I dont know. I think ill buy a pair of swim fins. And a wading pool. Boy, shell sure like that. Your mother likes the water, does she . What else are you gonna get her, dennis . I dont know. Whats that sign say . Selfinflating life raft, birthday sale special. Hey. Do you think shed like a raft for floating around in for when we go up to the lake . Sure. Oh now, just a minute. Youre talking about a lot of money there. Thatthat thats rather expensive. Youd help us get whenever our money was worth. Wilson . George wilson . Uhhuh. Oh, well, thats different. Hes a Lodge Brother of mine. If mr. Wilson sent you over here, i know everythings all right. Now, let me see. Swim fins, rubber dandy wading pool [knocking] oh, good morning ms. Pompton. Ill see somebody waits on you immediately. Be right back. This thing doesnt even look like it would float. Hey, yeah. Whats this . Hey, its moving. Wow. Look at it swell up. Now the inflatable rubber raft. I dont think we want it anymore, mister. Why not . Its getting too fat. Good heavens, somebody stop it. Maybe it would go down if you stuck a pin in it, mister. Keep your idiotic ideas to yourself. Williams, come here, quick. Whos there . Oh. Hello, mr. Wilson. Have you seen dennis . Why, yes, alice, just a little while ago. Anything wrong . Oh, no, no. Its only that when things get too quiet around the house, let me out of here. Please let me out of here. Williams, you get this boy away from me or come along, boys. [music] i hope you got insurance, buster. Dont you think we ought to stay and help mr. Finch get that man out of there . I think youd both be smarter to stay here. By the way, you werent thinking of buying that raft uhhuh. Mothers dont like that sort of thing, honey. You stay here with me and well see if we can find her something she really will like. [music] get it off, get it off, get it off. Mrs. Pompton, what is it . Ants. Williams. What is it . Mrs. Pompton has ants. There, all gone. Is this your idea of a practical joke, mr. Finch . No, mrs. Pompton i am waiting for your explanation. Mister . Im busy. This bottle must have been left i am a very highly strung woman, mr. Finch. Im sure of that. I am also one of your very best customers. Indeed, you are. Mister . Cant you see that i am busy . That ladys arm finally fell off. [music] hello, mr. Wilson. This is alice mitchell. I hate to keep bothering you, but i wonder if youve seen dennis lately. Well, i imagine hes still doing that nice thing we were discussing a little earlier. Oh, i think i know what you mean, mr. Wilson. But just in case you do see him, would you send him home . Its getting late. Oh, all right. Oh, in fact, i have to go to the store for mrs. Wilson, so ill keep my eye open for him. And, alice. Alice yes . I dont think im giving away any secrets by saying a certain mother i know is due for a very nice little surprise. [music] here you are, dennis. Im sure your mother will like that lovely cologne, how many more presents can i buy for this much money, lady . Well, one little one, maybe. Only one . Gee whiz, a birthdays no good with only two presents. I want my mom to get so many presents shell be sore when she sees how much wrapping paper she has to clean up. You must remember, dennis, other people will be buying your mother birthday presents, too. No, they wont cause nobody else knows about it except mr. Wilson. My mom sure is gonna have a dumb birthday. Hey, dennis, look. Dennis hey, did he get his head stuck in those two little doors, lady . No. Hes advertising our birthday. The stores birthday, that is. He walks up and down in front of the store and people see the sign and they know its our birthday and they come in. Just because they read the sign . Thats right. I think i know how my mom can get more presents [music] get my mom a present. Her name is mrs. Mitchell. Buy it right here. Get my mom a present. Her name is mrs. Mitchell. Buy it right here. Give me the police. Get my mom a present. Her name is mrs. Mitchell. Buy it right here. I wanna report a violation of our child labor laws. Dennis get my mom a present. Her name is mrs. Mitchell. Great scott. Hi, mr. Wilson. Dennis, what in the world do you think youre doing . Advertising. Mr. Wilson oh, advertising. Dennis, thats ridiculous. Are you connected with this boy, sir . Boy, ill say, if it wasnt for him, my mom wouldnt have any birthday at all. In other words, hes your grandfather. You ought to be ashamed. Madam, will you please stay out of this . Now, dennis well, well see what the police have to say about a grandfather who indentures his grandson to a drugstore. Get my mom a present. Her name is mrs. Mitchell. Dennis buy it right here. Some of your work, mr. Finch . No, i dont understand. Wilson listen, lawrence, this woman has called the police. Dont try to pass the buck to somebody else, george wilson. Did you or did you not send this little blond demon over here all day to punish me poker. Now, listen, lawrence. Get my mom a present. Get it right here. You put him up to that. His own grandfather to will you stay out of this . Oh, stop ringing that stupid bell. Heres what im gonna do with you, george wilson. Im gonna get up at the next meeting of our brotherhood and expose you for what you are. Now what . This is what ive been trying to tell you, lawrence. Alice. Alice. Henry. My darling. Oh, what on earth are you doing home . Just as i was leaving the office, i got a Long Distance call. The man i was going to see is coming here instead. Oh, darling, thats wonderful. Now, we can all celebrate your birthday together. Wheres dennis . Hes out planning a surprise. Oh. For you. Oh, henry, you remembered how i love yellow roses. [phone ringing] hello. To the one and only girl in the world. Alice, its sergeant mooney. Hes got dennis down at finchs jail. What . I mean, finchs drugstore. Come on so then i made the sign and started walking up and down in front of the store like that other man did, so my mom will get a lot of presents on her birthday. But the sign, dennis, how did you paint that . You cant write yet. I know, so i got a great, big boy to help me. Im sorry i said all those things to you, george. Oh, forget it, lawrence. I didnt mean to yell at you. Oh, it was my fault for calling the police. Oh, thats all right. It spiced up the day a little. But, uh, i still dont get the part about the ants. Well, i think he said this other boy had them in a bottle and that caused the raft to blow up. He said no such thing. Well, he said the ants were in a candy bar. Sgt. Mooney this scared the first lady, she jumped, and knocked the other ladys arm off. The dummy, not the other lady. Watch your tone to me, mister. Oh, now, mooney, he was i own this store. I dont well, i heard just a minute, just a minute or ill haul you all in. Dennis. Gee whiz, mom, this was supposed to be a surprise. Hey, mom, theres dad. Yes, i know, dear. He came home unexpectedly. Dennis, what is this . I can explain, mr. Mitchell. Dennis wanted his mother to have a big birthday. Well, start at the beginning, mooney. Well, the boys came into the store, you see . One at a time, one at a time. How can he understand . Well, mr. Wilson said it would be a surprise. He certainly was right. I bet you get presents from people you never even heard of. Well, thats beside the point, dear. Dennis. What is it . I think she got stuck with a pin or something. Dennis, where in the world did you get the idea that your mother is 39 years old . Well, i asked mr. Wilson how old he thought mom was, and he said, no woman is ever over 40. [music] what a birthday. Yeah. When its your birthday, dad, im gonna get a bigger sign. No, youre not. I know you meant to do the right thing, dennis, but thats not the way to get presents for your parents. Its a lead pencil. Happy birthday, tommy. Yeah, tommy bought you a candy bar first, but it melted in his pocket and he had to eat it. Well, you tell him how much i appreciate it, dear. Oh, it must be another present. Dont pull it, dad i told you not to pull it, dad. Wasnt it swell of mr. Finch to give you this nice raft . Oh, and the paddles come with it. And, mom, i forgot to tell you happy birthday. [voiceover] leave it to beaver. Hugh beaumont. Tony dow. And Jerry Mathers as the beaver. old 1950s music want another cup of coffee dear . No dear, i have to be a regular guy and have one with the fellows down at the office or theyll think im a company spy. Not because you dont like my coffee. No, no, could have been a little stronger though. Oh, say dear, beaver gave me a book of raffle tickets to sell for him down at the office. How about getting me off to a flying start by buying the first one . Beaver gave me a book to sell around here. How about getting me off to a flying start . Oh, well, i guess i can get rid of one book for you. This raffles for the new hospital. How come beavers so interested . And hes sold three books already. Well i guess Fred Rutherford will buy a couple if i ply him with enough coffee and sweet talk. Bye. You save your sweet talk for me. Oh, sure. Youre prettier than fred. door slamming shut hey mom, you wanna buy a raffle ticket . I see beaver enlisted you in the cause too. Yeah, im supposed to sell em around school. At a dollar a piece . Are there many boys that can afford them . Afford em . Most of the seniors are driving better cars than their fathers are. Well isnt that nice. Hey mom, would it be ok if i quit high school . Well of course not you just started your junior year and youre doing just fine. Well yeah but i saw this ad in a magazine. They got a course where you study at home for six weeks, dont be silly. Well yeah, but look at all the time i could save if i got my diploma in six weeks, id have practically two whole years left just to goof around in. And if you did that, youd never get to college and be an engineer. Yeah, i knew there was a catch to it somewhere. So long ma. Hey mom did you sell any tickets yet . Well no not yet, its too early. No ones been around. Well when the milk man and the bread man come around, make sure you tell em the prizes. One allexpense trip to hawaii for two, one ranch mink coat, one sports car, three Color Television sets, 50 radios, and a hundred ballpoint pens. Well alright ill tell em, but i cant quite see our milk man in a mink coat. Gee mom, if he won that, he could probably trade it in for a couple dozen radios. Would you and dad be sore if i took wally . On account of him theres only one of him, theres two of you. Well honey i think we can wait and decide that when you win the trip. Yeah i guess so. old 1950s music ma im in here. Mom, whats the matter . Nothings the matter. Well then how come youre just sitting here listening to music . I happen to like it. I remember seeing this opera in new york. You mean, you went to the opera in new york . Certainly i did. I went to the opera and to plays. I even saw a fight in Madison Square garden. Holy mackerel. Well, gee, a guy never thinks of his mother as having a good time. Wally, i wasnt born a mother. laughs youre home before your brother. Yeah i saw him over on grant avenue. He was stopping people in the street, selling em raffle tickets. Well, that was enterprising. What do you mean enterprising . Hes just too dumb to know that hes making a fool of himself. I sold a book of tickets for beaver at school. Ill go put the money in his drawer. Hey mom, when you went to that fight at Madison Square garden, did you stand up and scream and holler . Like everybody else . Course i did. Holy mackerel. laughs if you take two of that book, gus, i get another one free. Well, lets see what this deal is here. Hawaii. I think i might be young enough to make the trip, but i might be just a little too old to enjoy it. Gee gus, what does that mean . Oh, nothing beaver. Well lets see. One ranch mink coat. Couldnt use that, i still got my old sheepskin jacket. Hey now heres one sports car its real neat, i saw a picture of it, and its got a red body with a top that goes up and down hey, that kinda appeals to me. Id get me one of them checkered caps and one of them english pipes. And there wouldnt nothing hold me down. You mean youll buy a ticket . Ill take two beaver. Gee thats neat gus. A guy down the street told me to get lost beaver you gotta expect those things. Man might not have been feeling too good. Lots of times in life, it aint so much rudeness as it is a sour stomach. old 1950s music what is it sonny . Well, im not lost or i didnt steal or break anything. I wanted to talk to you. What did you wanna talk to me about . I wanna know if youd like to buy a raffle ticket. To build a new hospital. Yeah, i dont know. They cost a dollar and i got a card in my pocket that says im not a gypper or anything. Well i guess i could take one. Is that the pens they use to write tickets with . Yeah. Here you go son. Gee thanks mister. And i hope i didnt interrupt you being mean to people. laughs mumbling old 1950s music did you sell beavers book of tickets down at the office today . Sure did. I sold four of em around here. The hair dresser said shed take the rest of the book tomorrow. Well fine. Drawings on monday isnt it . Mhm. Beaver has 10 tickets of his own already. Hes just sure hes gonna win. chuckles well Fred Rutherford bought five tickets, and hes sure hes gonna win too. I guess childish minds all run in the same pattern. doorbell ringing oh here ill take this. Oh hello eddie, come on in. Good evening misses cleaver. My, you look nice. Thank you misses cleaver. Wally and i are escorting two young ladies to the movies this evening. Oh, who are you taking . Wally hasnt told me yet. Well why dont you go on up . I think hes in his room. Thank you. Oh hello eddie. Good evening sir. What does he want . He and wally have dates. Who with . Wally hasnt told him yet. Hey wally. Oh hi eddie. Hey ya squirt, what did you do, rob a bank . No this is my raffle money. Yeah eddie, here you wanna buy a ticket . Are you kidding . What are you peddling these things for . On account of every time he sells a book of 10, he gets one free. Hes got 10 tickets already. And im gonna win something. Maybe a trip to hawaii for two. Look, they have these things rigged so a kid cant win. You wait and see. Theyll have some pretty nurse from the hospital win so they can stick her picture in the paper and get a lot of free publicity. Aw cut it out eddie. Beavers got just as much chance to win as anybody. Alright, so say he wins first prize, what happens . Your pop will take it away from you. What do you mean . Look, you dont think theyre gonna let you skip school and go sailing off to hawaii, do you . Believe me, if anybodys gonna be saying aloha in this deal, itll be your old man. Look eddie, if beaver wins a prize, my pop wouldnt take it away from him. If youd been pushed around as much as i have. Hey, who are we gonna take to the movies anyway . Im taking maryellen rodgers, and i got Belinda Mcgowen for you. Belinda mcgowen . Aw come on charlie. Look eddie, dont complain. Took me an hour to talk her into going with you. Alright, alright. See ya beav. Bye wally. So long chump. What are you doing . Oh im rewiring this lamp. The old cord is worn out. Did it make a short circus . laughs well not yet, but it was about to make a short circus. Hey dad, can i ask you something that isnt important . Uh huh. Well if i was in south america, and i was walking along, and i found a diamond mine, would you take it away from me . You know dad, youre pushing a lot more wire than whats coming out. Yes, i know beaver. Must be stuck. Why dont you pull it from the other side . Because son, in order to pull it from the other side, i have to get hold of it first. Theres always something, isnt there dad . laughs you sure you wouldnt take it away from me . Take what away from ya . The diamond mine id find in south america. Look, beaver i told you you could keep it, and i meant it. Now, run along son, find something to do, huh . Yes sir. laughs dad . What . Why dont you take a pencil and push it through . laughs dear . What . I wanna call the drug store. Wheres the pencil that was here . Its stuck in the lamp. Whatd you put it in the lamp for . Because your son came in here and told me to. old 1950s music ward, ward whats the matter dear . Ward they called 10 minutes ago. They called wait a minute, who called . The raffle people from the hospital beaver won a trip to hawaii . No he got the third prize a 3500 dollar sports car really . Really well for christs sakes well have you told him yet . Well this is wonderful maybe i ought to get the car and go look for him. Oh honey im so excited mom, hey mom were in here beaver. Hi mom, hi dad. How come youre smiling all over the place . Because beaver, you won third prize in the raffle. I won . Yes, a sports car. Boy i won, i won laughs i won, i won isnt that great yeah even if i died right now, id still be happy boys making car sounds boy that was neat beav. Now let me drive. laughs isnt this neat . Yeah, think of how much neater its going to be when i get my sports car tomorrow. Watch out eddie, were gonna burn rubber. What . And be like you eddie . Listen wise guy, you wanna go home with your teeth in your pocket . Aw come on eddie, leave him alone. Anyways, liable to hit you in the mouth. Yeah. Hey eddie, did you hear about me winning the sports car . Yeah i heard about it. Your parents take it away from you yet . I havent got it yet. Hes gonna get it tomorrow, and theyre gonna take pictures of beaver in the car and everything. Sure, and then theyll take it away from him. They will not. My dad said he wouldnt even take a milliondollar diamond mined away from me. Listen squirt, parents can do anything they want. And they got laws to have you put away if you squawk. You better just keep driving this box, kid. cause thats all youre gonna get. Aw come on eddie. Dont Pay Attention to him beav. Sure wally. Beaver, your dad wouldnt really take it away from you, would he . Course not. He said he was happy for me and everything. old 1950s music dear . Honey, you better go up and talk to the beaver, hes so excited he cant even think about going to sleep. laughs alright, i was going to have to go up and talk to him anyway. About the car . Yeah, he obviously cant keep it. Oh i suppose not. After all, what possible use can a kid in the fifth grade have for a 3500 dollar sports car . You know, its funny, i was talking to wally about cars the other day and he says that some of the boys in high school have better cars than their fathers. Oh, well im afraid were just not that kind of a family. I know dear. How are you gonna tell beaver . Well im just going to tell him that its completely impractical for him to keep the car. Ill tell him that ill sell it and put the money in a bank account and itll be there waiting for him when hes ready to go to college. Ward, couldnt we call the Hospital Fund and that he won the cash instead . No, i suppose we couldnt. Good luck honey. Hey wally, you wanna look at a picture of my sports car . Nah, you already made me look at it a million times. Well it wont hurt to look at it a million and one times. K ill take a look at it. knocking on the door hello fellas. Hi dad, im almost in bed. Hi dad. Hi. Well thats fine beav, but i wanna talk to you about something. Yes sir . Son, you know your mother and i love you very much, dont you . Sure dad. And you know anything we do is always for your own good, huh . Gee wally, i guess eddie was right. Yeah gee dad, eddie was telling the beaver that youre gonna take the car away from him. He was . He said youd have me put away if i squawked. Well, now look beaver, lets leave eddie out of this for a minute and just look at this thing logically. Now what on earth would a boy your age do with a 3500 dollar sports car . Gee dad, lots of things you couldnt drive it. Yeah dad, i know. But i could put it in the garage and sit in it when i came home from school. Can i have it dad . Its the biggest thing i ever want no beaver im afraid not. Gee dad, he cant drive it, but you could drive him around in it. Heck, he might even let you use it sometimes look fellas, the only practical thing to do is for me to sell the car and put the money in the bank for beavers college education. What are you crying about beaver . Gee dad, i dont know. What if turned out to be a dumb kid and couldnt go to college. Id be stuck with all that creepy money. laughs look son, when you think about this, ill tell you what, maybe i wont put all of the money in the bank. Well keep some of it and buy you a brand new bicycle. No sir, i dont want a brand new bicycle. Well beaver, youve been asking for one for a long time. No sir, youre gonna be mean to me. Im not going to spoil it for you. laughs alright beaver, then ill just have to do what i think is best. Im sorry you feel this way. Howd you make out . Miserably. He just cant see why i shouldnt keep the car. Beaver . I dont think you gave dad much of a break. Some break he gave me taking away my sports car. You know youre too young to drive that car. You know you cant let it sit in the garage and rot until youre 18. Dads just doing all of this for your own good. Yeah i know that. Well then how come youre making such a big fuss, and crying and everything . Just cause its for my own good doesnt mean it doesnt hurt. Hi dad. Hi. Well wheres the beaver . Oh he came down and ate early. Said he wanted to eat by himself. Well, dont tell me my sons avoiding me. Sure is dad. Last night he said he wasnt going to talk to you til he was dying. This morning he wasnt even sure about that. Well ward we cant let him act like that. You go on up and talk to him. What, go up and tell him he has to talk to me . No sir, i think hes being very foolish, but if hes not going to speak to me, im just going to ignore it. Gee dad, if you guys arent speaking to each other, whos gonna yell at the beaver heck, you cant just hit him without saying anything. laughs wally, i think your father and i can handle this by ourselves. Ok ma. Ward i think. Hi mom, im going to school now. Well, goodbye beaver. Yeah take it easy beav. Sure wally. Oh and mom . Would you please give this note to my father for me . Thank you. Well this is getting silly. Now hes writing me notes. What is it . For sale a red sports car with an up and down top which is brand new. The car was won in a contest by Theodore Cleaver who is too young, so is going to college instead of having fun. Who is selling it for my own good. Well i, i dont know quite how to take this. Gee dad, hes not trying to be a wise guy or anything. He wanted to tell you he was sorry, but just couldnt. I think this is kind of his way of showing it. Oh. Are you gonna fix it up and put it in the paper . No sir. Im gonna put this in the paper just the way it is. laughs old 1950s music door opening and shutting youre late for work. You grab your 10gallon jug of coffee, and back out of the garage. Right into your wifes car. With your wife watching. She forgives you. Eventually. Your Insurance Company, not so much. They say you only have their basic policy. Dont basic policies cover basic accidents . Of course, they say. With a Liberty Mutual base policy, new car replacement comes standard. And for drivers with accident forgiveness, Liberty Mutual wont raise your rates due to your first accident. Learn more by calling every policy is personal, with coverage and deductibles, customized just for you. Which is why we dont offer any offtheshelf policies. Switch to Liberty Mutual and you could save up to 509. Call Liberty Mutual for a free quote today at see Car Insurance in a whole new light. Hi dear. Oh hi. Howd you make out with the car . Oh thats wonderful. You know i must have had 40 calls today . I think that boy may have a career ahead of him in the advertising business. Back to normal. He came home happy, wanted a glass of milk, and he wants to know if youll help him with his arithmetic tonight after supper. Oh, well you wanna know something . Im really looking forward to inverting fractions with him this evening. You know ive been thinking ward. Every contest or raffle that comes along, beaver always enters in it. Guess this ones cured him for good. Hey beav, if you want, ill help you invert those fractions and junk. No im saving that to Start Talking to dad on. Hey youre not doing your homework. No im entering this contest in this magazine. Gee, you wanna go and win something they have to take away from you again . Wally, the way i figure it sooner or later ive got to win something theyll let me keep. old 1950s music tony dow, and Jerry Mathers as the beaver. June, june, where are you . Hi, folks. Im matt mccoy. For people as experienced as you and me. [ tires screech ]. Careful driving just comes naturally. All that experience should be worth something. And it is. With the aarp Auto Insurance program from the hartford. Switching saved me hundreds. In fact, four out of five aarp members age 50 and over who switched to the hartford from Companies Like allstate, state farm, and geico got a lower rate with the hartford. When i received the quote from the hartford, it was hundreds of dollars less than what i had previously been paying. [ mccoy ] you know, drivers 50 and over you could save even more. Call the hartford for your free quote. Not an aarp member . The hartford helps you join in minutes. Heres an Insurance Company that respects its customers enough to do the right thing. 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What is it, dear; what do you want . Dear, ive just been in the garage. Who has been at my tools . Well, i wouldnt touch em. I know what an old grouch you are about them. Right wally, wally, where are you . I dont know; i cant keep track of im right here. Well, if youre right there, didnt you hear me . He had the washing machine going. Yeah, i put my new blue jeans in there again to make em look old. Oh, well, wally, how many times have i told you boys a couple million times, i guess. Then where is my rake . Gee, i wouldnt take it; i dont wanna get clobbered. Ward, beaver has it. He has a job raking leaves over at miss landers house. Oh, thats right. I told him last night he could take it. Yeah, you did all that shouting for nothing. Yeah, dad, it sure is a shame you wasted that nice big mad like this. Well, i wouldnt worry about it. I could always use the practice. Hey, mom, how much is miss landers paying the beaver to rake leaves . I dont know, wally. All i know is he and whitey are doing the job together. Hes always had a crush on his teacher. I bet hed do it for her for nothing. I dont know about that, wally. You dont think he spent half an hour this morning cleaning out his ears for whitey whitney, do you . Its pretty neat raking leaves, huh, whitey . Yeah, its okay, but what if some of the guys saw us working in the teachers yard . So what . Sure, shes a neat teacher, and shes pretty, and shes fair, and she smells good, and shes always doing neat things. Sure, she is, but you dont catch me falling for that kind of junk. Hey, whitey, will you go around back and get a basket for the leaves . I dont like goin in back yards. A lady threw a bucket of water at me once. Theres no lady back therre. Okay. Hi, sonny. Hello, mister, are you looking for somebody . I sure am. Are you lookin for miss landers . Howd you guess . doorbell buzzes hi, alice. Hi, tom. All set . Beaver, are you doing a good job . Yes, miss landers. Say, i dont believe ive met your gardener, have i, dear . Oh, im sorry, tom. Theodore cleaver, this is thomas brittingham. How do you do, theodore . Glad to meet ya. Toms my fiance. Yes, maam. Beaver, when you and whitey finish here, youll find your money on the kitchen table, and theres some milk in the refrigerator, and i left out some cookies for you. I guess alice knows what you little fellas like, huh, teddy . Yes, mr. Brittingham. Bye bye, beaver. Bye, ted. Hey, beaver. What, whitey . Wasnt that miss landers gettin in the car with her legs all stickin out . The car with that guy drivin it dont be goofy. What would miss landers be doing in a car with a guy in it . Yeah lets put the leaves in here. Ehh what did you do that for . Im just mad at leaves, thats all. Hey, mom, how come i got stuck to help you with the dishes instead of dad . Wally, its not a matter of being stuck. You should be very happy to do some work around the house to contribute to the welfare of the family oh, you mean like on wagon train, huh, where they all chip in to kill the indians . Thats the general idea. You have a date tonight, wally . Yeah, im takin Mary Ellen Rogers to the movies. I sure hope she doesnt smell these fancy soap suds on me. Shes liable to think im puttin on the dog or something. In the den. Beaver asked him to help him with some homework words. Youre kiddin, mom. He never did homework on saturday night. Either hes goin flaky or hes up to something. Wally. All right, beav, whats the next word . Satellite. Well, you know what a satellite is. Its a body that orbits around another one. Yes, sir transistor. A transistor is a sort of radio tube, but its very small. You see, they replaced the regular ones so that fianshay. Huh . Fianchay. Well, i havent finished with transistor yet. You finished it enough for me, dad. Whats a fianshay . Fianshay . Do you by any chance mean fiance . I mean like when somebodys a fianshay to somebody else. What does it mean . Like when mom engaged that lady to do the laundry . laughs no, not exactly; it means engaged to be married. Does it ever mean anything else . No, a fiance is someone whos engaged to be married. Then i must have the wrong word, cause the person im thinkin of would never do anything like that. What kind of homework is this anyway . Its a new kind of homework that you think up yourself. Oh. Well, we finished in the kitchen. You finished in here . Yes, mom, were all finished in here. Ward, you shouldnt help beaver with his homework if youre going to upset him. I wasnt upsetting him. I was just giving him the meaning of those words. Oh, well, there are no words on there. Gee, dad, whats the matter . laughs you see, mom, i told you he was goin flaky. Ward, do you know that beavers been up in his room this whole evening and i havent heard a sound out of him . Yeah, i know. When a boy spends a whole saturday evening without having to be told to stop whatever hes doing, it just doesnt seem right. Maybe we ought to go up there phone rings ill get it. Hello. Hello, mr. Cleaver, this is whitey whitney. I wonder if i could talk to beaver, if youre not busy yellin at him or anything. Why, yes, i think so. Just a minute, ill call him. Beaver, telephone voiceover okay, dad hell be right here. Its that little friend of beavers you know, the one who always talks like hes just been frightened by something. Precisely. Thanks, dad. Hello, oh, hi, whitey. Hey, beaver, did you get the sunday paper yet . Gee, no, whitey. We never get tomorrows paper until tomorrow. Yeah, we always get tomorrows paper tonight. My pop said hed rather read tomorrows stuff tonight instead of waitin til tomorrow. Yeah, whats up . Theres something in the paper about miss landers. There is . Yeah, and its real horrible. You want i should tell you tonight, or do you want to wait til tomorrow and see it yourself . I think id better wait until tomorrow. Dont even want i should give you a hint . No, i dont want you should do that. What did whitey want, beaver . Uh, nothin. He must have wanted something or he wouldnt have phoned you. Oh, he just wanted to tell me that his pop always gets tomorrows paper today. Ward, i think you ought to speak to the beaver. You know hes upstairs acting moody again today . Oh, hes probably just a little under the weather. What do you think we ought to do about it . When i was a boy, my grandmother used to put me to bed and dose me with a tonic. laughs boy, it was the most evilsmelling bitter it tasted a little like it was made of a groundup innersole. Did it help . No, but it was certainly an incentive to get better. You tell about your boyhood. You know, sometimes i have trouble really believing they happened myself. Hi, wally. Hi, mom, hi, dad. Hi has the beaver said anything to you to explain why hes acting so strangely . Gee, mom, hes acting pretty normal. I asked him to stop using my washcloth, and he told me to quit shoving him around. Hell be okay, mom, hes got his kooky friend whitey up there with him now. Im gonna go out and mess around with eddie; so long. So long. Ward, i wish wally wouldnt use words like flaky and kooky. Well, dear, you wouldnt want all his friends to think he was creepy, would you . Youre a big help. Local girl to wed. I didnt wanna show it to you while your brother was in here, beaver. Boy, whitey, i never thought miss landers would go and do anything like this. Its right there in the printin. Yeah, i guess thats even worse than bein a fianshay. You know, when my brother got married, they had a picture in the paper of his wife just like that, only she was wearin a whole lace dress that cost 200. Hey, whitey, after your brother got married, he and his wife had some babies, didnt they . Sure, im a twotime uncle even. Do you think miss landers might have any babies . Sure, she might. Boy, whitey, all these years ive been thinkin teachers were something special. Now they turn out to be nothin but parents. laughter wally, beaver, hurry up; youre gonna be late wheres the beaver . Gee, mom, hes sick. He wasnt sick at breakfast. I dont think it was anything you cooked for him, mom. When he came up to get his books, oh, well, honey, you run on to school and ill go up and see whats wrong. Okay, mom. I dont know why he should wanna be sick, though. Hes got all his homework done and everything. So long. Bye. Beavers sick, he went back to bed. Hes probably been coming down with something all weekend. Want me to go up and see whats wrong . Oh no, honey, ill take his temperature and if i think its anything serious, ill call the doctor. Hmm, sick on monday morning. You know, i remember when i was a boy dear, wont you be late for the office . Oh, yeah. Have a nice day. Beaver, arent you going to eat anything . Gee no, mom, i dont feel like it. Well, you dont have a temperature. Im really sick, mom, honest i am. Well, all right, honey, you stay in bed today, and well talk about school tomorrow, all right . Im sorry i couldnt eat my soup. Maybe you can freeze it up and give it to wally for supper. I dont think so, beaver. You rest now, beaver. beaver sighs phone rings hello . Oh hello, miss landers. Mrs. Cleaver, i wondered if anything was wrong with theodore this morning . No, he just doesnt feel too well so i thought id keep him home in bed today. Im sure hell be back in school tomorrow. Oh well, i thought on my way home this afternoon, i could drop off his homework assignment and his new arithmetic book. I wouldnt want him to get behind the rest of the class. Oh, that would be fine, miss landers. I know beaver would be happy to see you. All right, see you this afternoon. Come on, beaver, hurry up and drink the orange juice. Mom wants to wash out the dirty glass. Hey, beav, if youre not sick in the head, and youre not sick in the stomach, what kinda sick are you anyway . I dont know, wally. I just feel awfuller than i ever felt before. Come on, beav, you can tell me whats the matter. I wont laugh or anything. Well, its somethin to do with miss landers. You mean miss landers, the teacher that youre always actin mushy about . Yeah, you know what she went and did . Gee, what . She went and got fianshayed up to get married. Boy, is that all . I thought she croaked or somethin shes gonna marry a guy named brittingham, and he plays tennis, and he calls her dear, and he even went and called me teddy well, what are you gonna do about it, beav . Youre gonna have to go to school sometime. As long as i live. Y, how do you think youre gonna get through the fifth grade without lookin at your teacher . What are you gonna do, wear a bag over your head . Its not funny, wally yeah, i guess i know how you feel. Once there was this movie called roman hoiday, and i kinda got a crush on that audrey hepburn. You mean that skinny lady in the movies . Yeah, but that was a long time ago before she got old. Well, i dont care if i ever see miss landers again after what she went and did to me. I might even go to a Different School or somethin. Look, beaver knock on door beaver, look whos here to see you. Hello, beaver. Well, beaver, arent you going to say hello to miss landers . Hello, miss landers. How are you, wally . I hear youre doing very well in high school. Its real nice of you to hear stuff like that. Beaver, beaver, miss landers brought you your homework assignment and she brought you a book. Wally, why dont you and i go downstairs, huh . Sure, mom. Well, good luck, beav. Oh, it was real nice to have seen you again, miss landers. Well, how are we today, beaver . Not so good. Im sorry; we have a new arithmetic book, and our assignment is right here. Beaver, youre not even looking at it. No, maam, im not. Whats wrong, beaver . Like mom said, im sick. And i think its something else. Now, do you want to tell me what it is . This is what it is. This is what upset you . Yes, maam. Beaver, lots of people get engaged and get married. Yeah, but i never thought youd go and do anything like that. Beaver, a teacher has as much right as anyone to fall in love and get married. Gee, now youre makin it worse. Beaver, i think youve built up a picture of me that no one could live up to. Gee, you were livin up to it real good, and then i saw you in that tennis suit. That guy called you dear. It said in the paper youre betrothed, and whitey said you might even have babies. Well, whats wrong with that . Gee, i wouldnt want anyone to see you in tennis pants, about you gettin married and havin babies and everything. Beaver, let me tell you something. Falling in love and getting married are nothing to be ashamed of. Its the people who do the giggling and the whispering who should be ashamed of themselves. Do you think you understand that . Well yeah, i guess so. And even if i am a teacher, dont you think im entitled to be happy . Yeah, i want you to be happy. I just wish there was some other way you could do it. Beaver, youre gonna like my husband. Hes a wonderful person, and youll get along with him just fine. Oh, and he played football in college, and after were married, i want you to come over and rake the lawn the way you always have. No foolin, would you really want me to . Yes, i would, beaver. Miss landers, when people get married, yes, they do. Well, do you think you could get mr. Brittingham to promise not to call me teddy . I think you can count on that, beaver. Thanks, miss landers. Shall we get to our homework . Sure, miss landers. June, june, im home hi, dear. Whats that, diamonds, rubies . Ice cream. I remember when beaver was a little fellow, he used to always ask for ice cream when he was sick. How is he tonight . Oh, hes fine. I found out what was wrong with him. Beavers been disappointed in love. What, at his age . Youre kidding well, he had quite a crush on miss landers. Miss landers . Yes, and now shes running out on him and getting married. Well, its all straightened out now. She came over and she had quite a talk with him. Hes even planning to go to the wedding. Well, even so, i think wed better just give him his ice cream and say nothing about it. Is that what your parents would have done if theyd found out you had a crush on your teacher . Of course not, theyd have put me to bed what are you lookin at me like that for . Oh, i was just thinkin about you, beaver. You know, youve really got it rough. I dont mean now. I mean all that junk that happened to you over the weekend. You got a big crush on your teacher. You meet her boyfriend; you find out shes engaged. Then you crawl back in bed and act like youre sick. Gee, wally, when you were my age, didnt stuff like that ever happen to you . I suppose so. I guess when you get grown up, you forget about all those dumb things that happen when you were a kid. I hope when im grown up, i wont forget about this. Sure, youll forget about it. In a couple of years, youll go to high school. Then youll go to college. Youll meet a whole bunch of girls. Youll probably marry one. Then, youll have a whole bunch of kids, and a job and everything. If you met miss landers on the street, shed be an old lady, maybe 40 years old, and you probably wouldnt even recognize her. Gee, wally, what did you go and say that for . Cant you let me get over the weekend before you mess up my whole life . laughter darrin, youre pacing. What . You know, toing and froing and toing and froing. I wasnt even aware of it. I guess its because i feel a little guilty about dropping the whole barrows umbrella account in larrys lap. Sweetheart, we are in salem on a vacation. Sort of. Now, we plan to take a nice drive up the coast to gloucester and have some lobster and [ telephone rings ] and thats probably larry. Dont worry, sweetheart. Ill get rid of him. [ ding ] [ sighs ] [ ding ] larry talk you into going to boston . Absolutely not. I was firm. Too bad . Yes, ive been called to an emergency meeting of the witches council. Terrific. Well, im sorry, sweetheart, but mothers giving a special demonstration of incantations, past, present, and future. Maybe you could call him back. Before id call him back, id go sightseeing alone. Serena why alone when serenas ready, willing, and able . [ ding ] hi, little cousin hi there, tall, dark, and mortal. If you dont mind, serena, youre one oh the charmschool dropout is in rare form today. [ laughs ] serena, the hotel doesnt allow pets or helicopters in the room, so would you mind getting rid of it . That can be arranged. And when you get rid of it, be sure youre in it. Thats cute. Darrin, theres no reason to be rude. Im sor but i got involved in the world kiteflying championships in india. Guess what . What . Disqualified . on a mere technicality. Instead of flying [ laughs ] oh, thats a shame. I wouldnt have disqualified you. You wouldnt . Of course not. The longer youre in the air, the more chance you have of hitting a tree. Sweetheart, in the best interests of keeping peace in the family, why dont you reconsider and go sightseeing with serena . I have to go to the meeting anyway. Twos company, except when shes one of the two. I could meet you at the gloucester house for lunch. Absolutely under no circumstances will i go any place with her. Oh hes such a darling and since the invitation comes straight from the heart, i accept. Good. Ill meet you there about noon. I think i missed something somewhere. You do all this research on a perfect car then smash it into a tree. Your Insurance Company raises your rates. Maybe you should have done more research on them. For drivers with accident forgiveness, Liberty Mutual wont raise your rates due to your first accident. Just one of the many features that comes standard with our base policy. For a free quote today. See Car Insurance in a whole new light. Stop the car stop the car what is that . its just a statue. They that go down to the sea in ships. Who is this cat, anyway . Dont you know anything . This is the famous fishermans memorial. Oh, and what a knockout of a memorial he is. Just dig that weatherbeaten face and those powerful arms. [ gasps ] what a ball to be steered by him well, serena, this is the closest that youre going to get to this cat. Unless you turn yourself into a seagull. Dumdum, i wouldnt bet my plantation on that if i were you. Pride of gloucester, sentinel of the sea, i deem you come alive and swagger down to me. [ ding ] [ ding ] still think hes for the birds . You might call it fun and games. Well, i call it insanity. Serena, put this statue back or oh, he is not a statue he is here. Touch him. Touch my person, and ill thrash you within an inch of your life you can touch me. Him, no. Serena, im not asking you. Im telling yeah, fine wench. Its been 50 years since ive kissed a lassie. Oh, whoopee you know something . Theyre better when theyre aged. Serena, im finished with you. Well, im not. Goody. Serena, i by the time i count to three, theres going to be trouble. Dumdum, you are absolutely right. Start counting. [ ding ] [ ding ] dont forget, it was your idea. Shiver me timbers. Whats that . Oh, that is a car. Its used for transportation and air polluting. Listen, me ancient mariner, why dont we split to someplace more romantic so you can catch up on all youve been missing these last few years. Split . Leave, embark, set sail. Ill have none of it if i have to sail there. Well, set sail is just an expression. Besides, what have you got against water. Nothing. It just scares me out of my wits. Well, thats ridiculous youre an ablebodied seaman. You forget, i stand for all those ablebodied seamen that drowned. Okay. Heave to and well fly there. The only water youll see is the kind you pour over your scotch. What do they call this paradise . I havent named it yet. Its just a Little Something i whipped up to make myself comfortable in salem. [ laughs ] come, come. Say, uh, how about sitting down and resting those strong, magnificent sea legs of yours . Lets not get too close to the water, please. Whos that . Oh, its just an exfriend of mine. He got stoned one night, so i left him that way. [ laughing ] oh. Ooh ooh. Whats the matter, sweetie . Me back, lassie. Me back. Ive been standing over that wheel for almost 50 years. Me back is killing me. Oh, dear. Well, here. [ cracks ] [ laughs ] now, let me rub it for you. Hows that . Oh, lower, lassie, lower. Gladly [ laughing ] oh, you are gorgeous. Oh, my. [ gasps ] darrin, is that you in there . Oh, sweetheart. I dont know what to say, except i have a cousin who makes Lucrezia Borgia look like shirley temple. But dont you worry. Ill figure out a way to get you out of there. The hotel clerk said theyre having lunch at the gloucester house. Im sure well find him there. I hope so, mr. Tate. As a matter of fact, theres mrs. Stephens now. Where ill say one thing, though if you have to be a statue, this is a nice place to be one. Over there, talking to that statue. Huh . I mean over there by that statue. Oh. Darrins probably around some place. To help preserve our environment. I got involved. I boosted tourism in my Farm Community by by painting 55 barn quilts. I got involved. I enjoy gardening and love delivering a fresh supply of produce and flowers to a local shelter. Young volunteers have a winning spirit that we think is worth celebrating. Middle and High School Students ask your School Principal about applying for a prudential spirit of community award. Volunteer larry hi, sam. [ laughs ] am i glad i found you. Oh, well, hi, larry. What are you doing in gloucester . Hopefully having lunch with you and darrin. Oh, mr. Barrows, this is mrs. Stephens. How do you do . How do you do . Mr. Barrows is head of barrows umbrellas, and hes just dying to hear some of darrins new ideas. Thats nice. Where is he . Who . Darrin. Oh. [ laughs ] well, hes hanging around here somewhere. Ms. Stephens, tate here speaks very highly of your husband. Hes got him on some kind of pedestal. Oh, well, thats nice. Darrins very comfortable on a pedestal. [ laughs ] yes, sir. Well, sam, lets go find him, oh, o lets just go to lunch, just the three of us. The three of us . Oh, itll be fun sam, you all right . No. I mean, uh, i get a little lightheaded when im hungry, and i am just dying for one of those lobsters. Larry . Come on, larry. Come on. You know, its funny. Ive never seen this statue before, but it looks very familiar to me. Wait. This is the fishermans memorial. Its dedicated to the more than 10,000 fishermen who lost their lives at sea. Come to think of it, he looks more defiant and ferocious than i remember him. Oh, he looks ferocious all right. Is that all you can see . Huh . You know, its amazing. The face of this statue looks a great deal like stephens. Sam, cant you see the resemblance . No, not really. I mean, examine the chin. That is not darrins strong chin. Yeah, his chin is kind of weak. Very. Well, now that we decided the statue doesnt look like mr. Stephens, suppose we take mrs. Stephens to lunch . Uh, why dont you two go on without me . But you just said you were starving. Yes, i did, didnt i . Well, um, why dont you two go to the glouceste and ill wait here for darrin . But we dont want to take a chance on miss why dont we all wait here . Oh, uh, larry, i dont think thats such a good idea. Why not . Yeah, why not . Because i suddenly remembered that darrin said he was going to take a walk and he wanted me to meet him at the gloucester house. [ chuckles ] yes. I told you, i get a little lightheaded when i get hungry. Especially for lobster. All right, tate, lets go. All this talk about lobsters making me hungry. [ chuckles ] may i help you . Were looking for mr. Darrin stephens. Uh, we have a reservation for mr. Stephens, but i dont believe hes arrived yet. Well, ing him up. I hate to think. Larry, why dont you and mr. Barrows go to the table . Ill join you in a moment. Right this way. Mr. Barrows. Bartender, set them up for everybody. Im buying. [ ding ] and forget the little lady who was just here. She must be a toteetaler teetotaler. Whom i thought might be here. One is oh, you mean that pretty girl and that nuttylooking sailor . Theyre the ones. Not that i watched, mind you, because it was none of my business, but they was Holding Hands and kissing and whispering to each other. You want to know what they was whispering . Uh, no, thank you. I ju well, i turned back to my clipping, like this. [ ding ] and when i turned back, like this, they was. Gone. Just like you. When John Paul Potter iii drinks, everybody drinks. Another round for the folks. [ ding ] well, the little toteetaler is back. How about a little nip, sweetie . Oh, well, thanks, uh, but i think youre doing just fine for both of us. Cheers. [ laughs ] fisherman . Blow the man down give me some fellows who follow the sea ah. There you are. Sam, look who we ran into serena and her. Boyfriend. I cant imagine whats keeping darrin. No offense, mrs. Stephens, but ill give him five more minutes, and then i l serena, i think you and i should have a few words together. Excuse me, my Little Chicken of the sea. Oh whoo chicken of the sea. Thats me. Serena, i dont want to know how and i dont want to know why. I just want a Fair Exchange darrin for your seaman. Well, okay, coz, potters springing. Sos serena. [ ding ] i think the partys over. [ ding ] [ ding ] so long, dumbo. [ ding ] sam, whats happening . Shh, shh fisherman blow the men down, blow the men down whoaho i hate to interrupt your good time, but if the pirate of penzance isnt out of here immediately, barrows u [ ding ] where did he go . He was [ laughs ] come on. Come on all right, tate, lets get my hat and umbrella and go. But, mr. Barrows gentlemen, look who i found waiting outside. Mr. Barrows, this is darrin stephens. Mr. Barrows. Darrin, ive just been telling mr. Barrows that the only reason youre at salem is to work on some ideas for barrows umbrellas. Mr. Stephens, ive had a very difficult and strange day, and i no longer have any interest in any of your ideas. Mr. Barrows, if you dont want to listen to darrin, would you listen to me . Mrs. Stephens, im a businessman most of the time, but im a gentleman all the time. Please sit down. Thank you. Now, tell me about it. Well, darrins idea is to use the fishermans memorial as a symbol for barrows umbrellas. Thats why w uhhuh. Mr. Barrows, what percentage of umbrellas are bought by women . About 80 . Aha the men dont seem to want to buy them, right . Is to make the umbrella more attractive to men by associating it with a masculine symbol the fishermans memorial. Hmm. Mr. Barrows, im sure if you hear darrin present his idea, itll be more impressive. I like that idea. But i doubt it. Samantha explained it so beautifully. Tell us the rest of it, young man. Picture this the helmsman standing in the face of a fierce storm, one hand on the wheel, the other holding a barrows umbrella. I love it even the men who go down to the sea in ships carry barrows umbrellas. Stephens, its sensational sensational you were well worth waiting for. I told you he would be. But id still like to know where youve been all this time. Well, darrin was just staring out to the sea, thinking. Isnt that right, sweetheart . Yeah, thats right. Well, lets everybody have a drink. Oh, great idea. Waitress waitress samantha you know, sweetheart, thats a great idea. Even men that go down to the sea in ships carry barrows umbrellas. Ive got an idea for another slogan not even a noreaster can blow out a barrows umbrella. [ ding ] hi speaking of ill winds. Watch it, dingdong. For what . well, you landed the dumb account, didnt you . Ill thank you to blow out of here. [ wind gusting ] tata [ ding ] darrin, you know something . I think i liked your first slogan better. [ chuckles ] oh, boy. Captions by vitac oh, hi. I set it on the table. Thank you. Just what we needed another package. Here. Thanks. Oh, darrin, look at the darling teapot that larry sent us. Larry. By special messenger . I wonder what his angle is. Does there always have to be an angle where larry is concerned . There have been times when hes done something nice without an ulterior motive. When . I wonder what his angle is. Esmeralda hello, samantha, mr. Stephens. Im sorry to bother you, but esmeralda, youre not all here. [ ding ] shes not all there, either. Darrin. Oh, dear. I always do that when im rushing. Is anything wrong at home . Oh, no. Everythings fine. Hows the vacation . But, uh, whos with the children . Oh, i got aunt hagatha to sit with them while i checked with you. I was worried because tabitha wants to change the baby. Whats wrong with that . She wants to change him into a rabbit. Absolutely not. Well, i guess id better get back and relieve aunt hagatha before mrs. Tate gets there. Mrs. Tate . Louise was kind enough to say shed drop in and check on the kids from time to time. Whats all this . Thats samanthas famous parlor trick. She takes a months pay and turns it into a lot of packages. And thats before lunch. Ill just take them back with me. Oh, no, dont bother, esmeralda. Its no trouble, samantha. No, no, eesmeralda, please dont. [ ding ] sam, since the subject of change has come up, id like to propose one. [ ding ] but she is neat. And the children adore her. There are theres serena and uncle arthur and mother and daddy. Like i always said, theres nothing wrong with esmeralda. Right. Sweetheart, ive planned the whole afternoon. After the peabody museum, well go visit the pioneer village, and then well drive to sturbridge and [ telephone ringing ] hello . Larry. Dont let him talk you into anything. By the way, sam and i want to thank you for that teapot you sent us. We both think its oh . Its not for us . Well, that old teapot may help us swing the greatest deal since the alaskan purchase. Larry, hes still in boston. I decided to stay over because ive run into a wonderful opportunity for you. Larry, i hate to point this out, but when one is on vacation and one starts working, one stops being okay, okay. Well discuss fine. In the meantime, ill send you a postcard. Byebye. Im proud of you. I dont know. He gave in too easily. Bostons only a half an hour from here. Wed better get going. Oh have to get my purse. [ gasps ] [ laughs ] just as i thought trying to pull a fast one and sneak out. But, being a bit sneaky myself, i was one step ahead of you. I called from the lobby. Larry, whatever it is youre up to, forget it. Dont turn me down without a hearing. Ill give it to you in three words sir leslie bancroft. That name doesnt ring a bell . I dont even get a tinkle. You get any vibrations from British Imperial textile mills . He owns it. Lock, stock, and dividends. Sir leslies just in from london, and do you know why . Darrin doesnt care why. Do you, sweetheart . Thats right. I dont care why. Why . To find the proper agency to devise a tasteful campaign to introduce his product to the American Market. And i think ive convinced him were the ones to handle his account. How did you do that . Thats where the teapot comes in. The old silver fox found out that sir leslies a revolutionary war buff. Can you imagine how grateful sir leslie will be when you present him with an original paul revere teapot . Thats an original . Thats original. Forget it. Sam and i have plans. So have i. And they include our joining sir leslie, whos waiting in the park right now. Forget it. You mean you intend to persist in this stubborn, hardnosed attitude of yours . I do. All right. I dont need you. Ill take my teapot and go. I dont mean to be impatient, but id like to have my teapot, please. Well, the truth is, uh, its not here. Thats the truth, all right. Exactly where is my teapot . Thats a good question. Oh, uh, iill bet the maid pput it in the bedroom. Ill get it for you. Ill help you. Well, just hurry it up. When she took the rest of the packages. You stall. Ill pop home and get it. First make sure louise isnt there. Okay. [ beeping ] stephens residence. [ din yes. Shes out on the patio with the children. Uh, well, i was calling to find out if you t its a square box, and it has an antique paul revere teapot in it. Oh, wait a minute. Ill look for it. Here it is. Chec i found it, and ill send it right back to you. Maybe youd better do that. [ ding ] let me see. How does that go again . Uh. Oh, yes. Pheasant, finch, and a fat, white gander. Add a spotted salamander. Season, baste, add return the pot of paul revere. Oh good grief and who are you, mistress . Aand what manner of place is this . Uh, mmr. Revere, please, uh, be patient. Iill explain it all in just a minute. Hello . Hello. Operator. Operator, get me esmeralda quick sir leslie, this is darrin stephens, my associate. How do you do . How do you do . Ive heard some rather splendid things about you. [ chuckles ] larrys always exaggerating. Your country owes a great deal to roger conant. Im well aware of that heroic english seaman. I see youre a history buff yourself. Oh, ever since i was a little boy. You werent exaggerating about your young man, not in the least. Now, sir, im most anxious to hear your ideas on how to introduce my product to your country. Well, i, uh, havent worked out anything in detail. Uh, so lets go back to darrins suite and chat, hmm . He has an early american teapot hes anxious to show you. Young man, how old is your teapot . Oh. Its old. Could have been made by paul revere. Jolly good. Lets pop along and have a look at it, shall we . Youre a what . a witch. But a good witch. I see. Darrin sam . Im back with larry and sir leslie. Sir leslie . So, you are in league with the british. I must ride to warn my countrymen. There is no need for you to ride at this time. Yyyou stay here. Trust me. Iill let you know when its time to make your ride. It will go ill with you if i am betrayed. Dont worry. Im ill already. Sam . Excuse me. Oh, sam. Uh, sir leslie, this is my wife, samantha. Oh, hhow do you do, sir leslie . How do you do . Its a great pleasure. Sam. Hi. Did you, uh, get the teapot . Are you ready for a joke . They lost the key to the storage room. Youll excuse me if i dont collapse with laughter. But it will be here as soon as they make a new key. Theres no point in getting into a flap about it. Well just wait. Oh, well, sit down. Ah, thank you. As a ma to hear some more about your ideas because my people tell me to expect stiff competition as we invade the American Market and establish British Imperial as top dog for all time. Whats the use . Im tired and ive got a splitting headache and my throat is getting hoarse. [ rattling ] [ neighs ] a Saturation Campaign will capture the american [ horse neighs ] [ horse neighs ] youll never succeed, britisher dont point that at me hhes the britisher youll be opposed by every man, woman, and child, sir uh, uh, si revere, sir paul revere yes, of course. Delighted, im sure. Who is this anyway . Its paul revere, isnt it, sam . Yyes. Mmatter of fact, it is. Courtesy of eesmeralda. Who . Well, aactually, uh, mr. Revere is the head of a rock group. He lives his part. Surely youve heard of them ive heard of the group, but i thought they were younger. Oh, well, yeah, they they were when they first started. But, u you know how it can age you. Ive heard enough you dont think id sit idly by and listen to your treasonous plans open excuse me. You too. The british are coming the british are coming samantha oh, no, no wait, mr. Revere wait a minute oh, my stars. I would hope theres a reasonable explanation for mr. Reveres behavior. I doubt it. But go ahead have a whack at it. Aall right. Here it is hes. A symbol. Paul revere, alerting all america that the british are coming. Well, that is [laughs] British Imperial textiles is coming here, taking the country by sto i see then this whole thing was an advertising stunt. [ chuckles ] what did i tell you about this boy . Theres your campaign in a nutshell. Youll have the public eating out of your hand sir leslie . Why are you putting on your hat . I always do that when im leaving. I run a business, not a circus. You and your wild ideas the british are coming. Small correction the british are going. The british are coming the british are coming to arms to arms ill say this much abo they put on a great show a fraternityinitiation stunt . The truth is that during the revolutionary days, there was an Organization Called the sons of liberty that was headed by. Paul revere. Uncle charlie takes that organization very seriously. You mean he thinks hes paul revere . You mean hes. Oh, yeah. [ clicks tongue ] just a moment, ms. Stephens. Clancey did you call me . Let the lady have a couple of minutes with that weirdo we just. Im sorry. With mr. Revere. Go ahead. I dont blame you. No. No, mr. Revere, i am not going to laugh at you. You were telling me the truth. The world has moved on a w all i did was to play the fool. Dont say that. Your ride is history. There was just no reason for you to ride again. Could you send me back now . Well, i cant. Esmeraldas working on it. But before she does, theres something id like you to see. Take my hand. Well make a quick trip to boston. [ ding ] sorry, folks, but youre theyre gone. How did you let them get past you, clancey . i didnt. I opened the door and they disappeared. What am i talking about . you saw them disappear i didnt see anything. But and its not gonna look good for you at all. Look familiar, mr. Revere . Why. Thats me. Paul revere, american patriot, whose perilous Midnight Ride brought warning to embattled farmers and fused these lovers of liberty into an emerging nation. [ bell tolling ] and the old north church. After one if by land, two if by sea. Aye. That was the signal, all right. I cant get over it. A comely miss like you, a witch . Well, were not all hags, you know. [ ding ] how strange. Nnot really. It just means that esmeraldas spell is working. No, no, no. This teapot i made it. It has endured all these years. Ii beg your pardon, mr. Revere, but its a reproduction. You see, it doesnt bear your mark. But of course not, and youll read no mark at all. This is the teapot i was working on the night i was called to ride. I couldnt expect my country to while i put my mark on a teapot. In the days that followed, there was much confusion. Somehow, it disappeared. Here. Allow me. For you, dear lady. Oh, thank you, mr. Revere. You may call me paul. Well, yyoull be leaving any moment. It was a great pleasure meeting you, mr. Paul. [ ding ] esmeralda, for once in your life, of all the dimwitted, lamebrained ideas. Youre repeating yourself, larry. Yes, and im going to keep right on repeating myself. Thanks to your lamebrained, dimwitted i sir leslie. Sam. Well, hhow about this for a coincidence . Sir leslie and i met in the lobby. My teapot. Llarry, wait a minute. I think theres something i want you to have this, sir leslie. A gift from me to you. But, larry but i thought it was mr. Stephens teapot. Thats right. A gift from stephens to you. What is it, sam . Oh, uh, nothing important. Now, ive been thinking about that idea of yours. Oh, forget it. It was all a mistake. I was running a high fever at the time. Its too late. Ive already seen the fullpage ad. The fullpage ad . What fullpage ad . You know, the one sir leslie saw. And loved. The mystery of the daylight ride of paul revere. You know, the more i think about it, the more i realize that this ad is exactly what the doctor ordered. Paul revere on the highways and the byways, on the wireless, on the telly, in the newspapers, informing the American Public that british i its truly an inspiration. I dont think thats quite the word. Of course thats the word an inspiration i never doubted it for a minute. I knew youd come through, sweetheart. And the chap that played the part yes. He wasnt bad, was he . Perhaps he could mr. Revere is in retirement permanently. Pity. Great scott this is aa genuine paul revere. Well, naturally. You dont think stephens genuine . No doubt about it. Heres h oh, i ca its worth a fortune. Well, in that case you keep your teapot, mr. Stephens. Now, i shall be getting back to boston. Will you be handling the business elements . Yes. Then lets get back to my hotel, mr. Tate, and start working out the details of our deal. Yes. Mrs. Stephens, so nice meeting you. Sir leslie. Thanks again, young man. My pleasure. Wow. Captions by vitac tony and there it is, iolani palace. Jeannie oh its beautiful, master. Yeah. It says, the cornerstone was laid, um, december 31st, 1879. The palace is a monument to the era of hawaiian monarchy. How about that . [banging] roger, what are you doing . Are you gonna eat that thing or are you gonna beat it to death . Im trying to get it open. I wonder how many hawaiians starved to death waiting for their breakfast. Well, it says in this book that king kamehameha could open a coconut with just two fingers. Two fingers . Oh, you cant believe everything you read. He must have been a very powerful man. Oh, yeah. He was a great man. Kamehameha nui was the most i thought we were talking about king kamehameha. Oh, yeah. Well, uh, nui means the great in hawaiian. It says here, over 200 years ago, he defended these islands against the invaders and drove them over the pali. I sure would have liked to have met him. I did say i wish i could have met him, didnt i . Yes, master