Featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now its time for the late show with Stephen Colbert captioning sponsored by cbs stephen hey stephen hey cheers and applause stephen hello how are you . Hey, everybody hi, up there. Hey is welcome to the late show, everybody. Thanks so much. Hello. Welcome to the late show. Oi am your host, Stephen Colbert. Happy, friday, everybody. Thank god it is friday, which is totally is. I if you dont live in new york, you might not know about whats going on in times square. And if you do live in new york, you also dont know whats going on in times square, because we do not set foot in that hellscape. Heres whats going on. Its about the unlicensed costumed characters who dress up and take pictures for tips. You can tell theyre unlicensed by their slightlyirregular costumes and their tendency toward racism and violence. laughter because these guys and gals are always running afoul of the law. Over the past couple years alone, an elmo was arrested for shouting antisemetic rants, chewbacca and a stormtrooper were arrested for intimidating a man into giving them 10 each, and cookie monster was arrested for groping a teenager. laughter c is for you dont want to know what c is for. laughter if there was only a superhero who could put a stop to something like, this like spiderman. Unfortunately, spiderman was fined 370 for punching a tourist. Wow you can punch tourists in times square for only 370 . cheers and applause that is cheaper than hamilton. laughter well, the city is trying out a new way to bring order to the troubled area. Its a new, brighter look for times square the beginning of the new colorcoded designated zones painted overnight. Areas with the green paint will be socalled chill zones where pedestrians can relax without concern about being approached by the topless painted ladies and other characters. Stephen its like running to home base when youre playing tag, except instead of playing tag, youre playing a game called super mario grabass. And theyre not just adding chill zones. There are violethued express lanes, where people can walk without hassle. And there are the azure blue designated activity zones where costumed and uncostumed characters can pose for pictures in exchange for tips. I think this is great that theyre containing character chn these boxes. And theyll definitely work because a man whos willing to punch a tourist over 10 will certainly respect the authority of a colored sidewalk. cheers and applause anyway, be careful. Just be careful. Hey, heres a quick question. Who here enjoys shouting and clapping . cheers and applause me, too, me, too. Thats nice. Im sorry, i misread that. Im sorry, i misread that. Who here likes marijuana cheers and applause no, you dummies. Now the cops have you on top admitting it. Ive got one more thing for to you cheer about because recently, researchers found that chronic marijuana use is about as bad for your health as not flossing. Bad news laughter because not floss category give you bad breath and your altoid tin is filled with weed. cheers and applause i hear. I hear. I hear thats where people keep it. Now, the study found that over the course of marijuana users lives, smoking pot had no negative health effects, except a higher rate of gum disease, and from this moment on, paranoia about getting gum disease. Your dentist totally knows. So it turns out pot isnt that dangerous. And im sure this news is really resonating with my intern, stoney von dankington. Say hi to stoney, everybody. cheers and applause so, stoney, did you hear the news . You must be pretty excited, right . Im pretty stoked. Im pretty stoked. Hey, stephen, do you know what time it is . Stephen stoney its nowhere near 4 20, okay. Its like 11 40 at this point. 11 40 you know what that means stephen time to smoke weed maybe. What . No, 11 40 is the perfect time to not floss. laughter applause stephen all right, thats very nice. Thats very nice. But if youre not going to floss, why are you pulling out all that floss . Why are you asking, man . Are you a dentist . You know, legally, you have to tell me if youre a dentist. Stephen i dont think i legally have to do that, but, no, im not a dentist. Sorry, sorry, party foul. You want to partake in the flossytossy . Stephen no, thanks, stoney. Frankly, i dont know how you get so much enjoyment from just wasting floss. Oh, thats because im super high. laughter Stephen Stoney von dankington, everybody cheers and applause that kid that kid just got a College Credit for that. Now say hi to jon batiste and stay human, everybody. applause cheers and applause stephen thank you, jon. Hey, folks, while ive got your attention, has anybody here heard of star wars . cheers and applause everybody is excited about the newest film in the star wars continuum rogue one a star wars story. Im excited about that one. But im just as excited for rogue one part 2 rogueyo drift. I hope its called. Thats what i hope its called. Heres the deal with rogue one. Last week, it was announced that the film is getting a bunch of reshoots, usually a sign that a movie needs fixing. But i say while theyre in there anyway, lets put in some stuff weve always wanted to see in a star wars movie. How have we gone seven films without seeing the stormtrooper canine unit or cool teenage yoda . Or how about chewbacca in a chewbacca mom mask . But most of all, i hope we see more of a character that was only hinted at in the first trailer that came out. You see, a lot of folks were excited because they thought they heard darth vader breathing in the background of the trailer. Its possible. Star wars superfans either heard vader or their own hyperventilating. laughter but ill tell you, i listened very carefully to that first trailer, because am a superman. Ive been a fan since i was 13 years old. J. J. Abrams is a friend of mine. laughter yeah, i went there. I went there. But i am way more excited about another character who you never see in the trailer. You only hear. Now, sharpeyed listeners might be able to pick this character out. Jim. State your name for the record. Jyn erso. Forgery of imperial documents, possession of stolen property, aggravated assault, resisting arrest. This is a rebellion, isnt it . I rebel. whooping sounds stephen okay, did you catch it . Its the exciting new star wars character, whoopi willy. Lets hear willys catchphrase again. whooping sounds well laughter theres a second trailer out now now so we get to see where he fit into the scr and because j. J. Abrams is a y friend of mine, he got a copy. He sent it to me. We have an exclusive look. Jim . We have a mission for you. A major weapons test is imminent, and we need to know what it is and how to destroy it. whooping sounds what will you do when they catch you . What will you do when they break you . If you continue to fight, whooping sounds y cheers and applause whooping sounds cheers and applause stephen fantastic Everybody Loves whooping willy. Kids, when rogue one comes out, be sure to go to the movie dressed like whooping willie and yell his catchphrase throughout the entire film. Real star wars fans will love it. Well be right back with David Duchovny. applause ,,,, applause stephen hey welcome back, everybody. I am so happy that our first guest is back tonight. You know him from the tv series the xfiles and californication. He now stars in aquarius. You are really good looking. I hope you dont mind my saying, but youve got great skin, doesnt he sarge. Very supple. Supple, smooth, tight, taught its taut, really, isnt it . I bet the girls pile outside your door like . O banks. Let me ask you, because want sergeant and i arent get anything younger, do you think its too late to start moisturizing with a little cocoa butter before bed. I dont know what youre on, but kiss my ass. Sarge . Stephen please welcome David Duchovny. cheers and applause stephen its nice to you have back. Thank you. You know where i learned that move. Stephen which move . Watching chopped with my daughter. Stephen trying to force someones face into a burner . Yeah, yeah. Stephen i missed that episode. Chef, what have you got for us today . Ive got a blond guys head. Stephen that sound delicious. Thats great. You put a little balsamic vinegar on it, i would eat that. A reduction of some kind. Stephen why cant we eat our food the way it is. Why do we have to reduce it first . Its really reductive. Stephen i reduce my food to tears. I say things to my spinach i can never take back. Why is the chef always doing stuff . Why is he always doing . The chef cooks. The chef makes. No, why is he doing it . Stephen i dont know. Stephen stephen i dont know what youre talking about. But youre my guest so i agree with you wholeheartedly. A ball sage reduction, why is he doing it. Stephen i dont know why. It sounds fancier. Your mom cooks. My mom cooked me a meal she didnt do anything. She cooked. Stephen no, she didnt. Mom what, are you doing dont . Im doing spaghetti and meat balls. Stephen was that your moms goto. Its every moms goto. My scottish mom, spaghetti and meat ball s. Stephen no head cheese. On special days. Maybe a seder. Stephen i think head cheese might be chafe . Its more than that. Stephen i really enjoyed having you on last time but i just wanted to point out that you dropped the f bomb so many times on the show tactually got written up in usa today. Stephen colbert and David Duchovny are mean to cbs censors on the late show. So, please, please. cheers and applause its a family show. Please. I i i i feel bad about it. I do. And im im very very sorry. laughter stephen ill pass it on. bleep i am sorry. cheers and applause stephen well, congratulations on your book, by the way. You were on here last time which is called. Bleep buckey dent. Stephen right. Its a huge hit. You try your hand at writing. You turn out to be a good writer. When you were on last time you talked about the value of failing and celebrating the losers. Wouldnt it have been better for you to fail at writing a book . Yes. Stephen what have you failed at professionally . You have failed at anything . Yes. Stephen what . Well, i wrote and directed a movie that came out in about 2006, i think, called house of d. Wait for applause. Not forthcoming. Failure. Right there. Stephen house of d. It came out in canada and it came out to mixed reviews. Stephen did you flee to canada . I did. And i was just acting in canada, and my driver was french canadian and, obviously, didnt speak english very well because left the review in the canadian paper open on my seat. Stephen for you. For me to read. Obviously, he didnt read english because the headline was, duchovny gets an f. And the first line of the review was a question, has David Duchovnys brain been abducted by aliens . Is that is that is that funny . laughter . Stephen now, now, with some time. Did you learn anything from that . Did you take anything from it . I felt like i had been punched in the stomach. I went to work. My head was spinning. I got an f, you know. Stephen house of d got an f. How clever, how clever. That was a friday. I did my work. I felt proud that i was able to act that day as bleep as i felt. Im sorry for using that word. Okay. Well, i felt like a professional. Dimy job. Stephen thats what a pro does. A pro does their job when they dont particularly feel like it. Thank you. I woke up the next morning. I felt fantastic, and i couldnt figure out why. And i realized my entire life i had been terrified of getting an f, and when i woke up that saturday morning i was alive and i was fine and i was like, you survived. You actually can get an f and move along. So i was thankful to that. cheers and applause . Stephen thats nice. I mean its its not like i want to make a steady diet of fs. Stephen yeah. But it was it was liberating in some way to have received it in such a public forum and to survive. Stephen now, f stands for fantastic. laughter you also you also now took you did, like, a musical tour. Europe, yeah. Stephen like, with a rock band, right . Yeah. Stephen and you put out an album and stuff like that. I didnt know you were a musician . Well, i dont tell you a lot, stephen. Stephen i mean this in the nicest possible way im not i did not know publicly, not like its a secret. It is kind of a secret. Im not a popular musician. laughter stephen like, when did you start doing this . In the last five or six years ive been playing guitar. Stephen five or six years ago, and now you went on an 11city tour of europe, right . Yes, 11 cities in 14 or 15 days. And it wasnt like the bon jovi video where we mopey and tired get on the private plane. Stephen yeah. It wasnt like that at all. We were in taxis and rickshaws and, you know stephen you were in rickshaws in europe . laughter the story is not holding together, David Duchovny. Weve got to take a little break its an outright lie. Stephen exactly. We have to take a little break. You can stick around please. I can stephen well be right back with more David Duchovny. As and when i finally told my doctor, he said humira is for adults like me who have tried other medications but still experience the symptoms of moderate to severe crohns disease. And that in clinical studies, the majority of patients on humira saw significant symptom relief. And many achieved remission. Humira can lower your ability to fight infections, including tuberculosis. Serious, sometimes fatal infections and cancers, including lymphoma, have happened; as have blood, liver, and nervous system problems, serious allergic reactions, and new or worsening heart failure. Before treatment, get tested for tb. Tell your doctor if youve been to areas where certain fungal infections are common, and if youve had tb, hepatitis b, are prone to infections, or have flulike symptoms or sores. Dont start humira if you have an infection. Ask your gastroenterologist about humira. With humira, remission is possible. With a little bit of uh uh, and a little bit of i said, its getting hot in herre new watermelon from limearita. The bold margarita. With tmobile and the incredible iphone, you can reach more people in more places than before. Whether youre at home in the basement, on the open road, or pulling the late shift at work. Youre more connected now, because tmobile doubled its lte coverage. And added extended range lte which reaches two times farther than before and is four times better in buildings. Right now, hook up the whole family with an iphone. Buy any iphone and get an iphone se free when you add a line. For early bird savings on great gifts for dad. Save on sonoma goods for life apparel and izod golf apparel. Plus, take an extra 20 percent off your purchase. Everyone gets kohls cash, too kohls. Is this my car . Ck. State farm knows that for every one of those moments. What . This is ridiculous theres one of these. Sam, i gotta go. Is this my car . What . This is ridiculous this cant be happening this cant be happening oh, its happening sweetheart. Oh, its happening sweetheart. Shut up shut up thats why state farm is there, what a day. With car insurance, for when things go wrong. But also here with car loans, to help life go right. State farm. What a day applause stephen welcome back, everybody. David, could i ask you a personal question . No. Stephen okay. Can i ask you an impersonal question . Yes, please, thats what im here for. Stephen youre an adult, right . Yes, i am, a. O. L. Beit one with boyishly good looks. Stephen thats true. Stephen yeah, me, too. Things were so much simpler do you ever miss being a kid . Yeah. Stephen things were so much then. You didnt have to know the reasons for things. You could make up things like politics now i have to know the reasons if for things. Stephen do you ever dreamave place where you can go and be a kid again . Yes, i do, i do. But thats just a beautiful dream. Stephen no, david. Its a beautiful reality, inside my blanket fort. cheers and applause stephen. Stephen david . Are you weak . Yeah. Stephen stephen hey, david . Oh thats so scary. Thats so scary. Dont ever do that again hey, hey no im not joking dont im sorry. Stephen dont my mom didnt put any pads down here. laughter it doesnt happen that much anymore but you dont at the present time to happen. Okay. Stephen hey, david . Yes, stephen. Stephen hey, david . Yeah. Stephen have you ever seen a bra . laughter . Yeah. One time my mom took me to j. C. Pennys and they were on lady mannequins. It made me scared and excited. laughter hey, stephen. Stephen yeah. What happens when you sneeze and no one says god bless you . Stephen you go to hell. Thats what my brother says, he says guto hell. Unless you say heavens to betty at the same time. Does that really work . Stephen if your name is betsy. laughter . Stephen. Stephen what . I feel like were being watched. laughter glp thats my sister . Oh, it is. Stephen go to bed, lulu youre not scaring us hey, david . Stephen. Stephen do you have hair down there . Oh laughter what no way youre only two months older than i am laughter how is that possible . Its a real busy two months, though. laughter . Stephen how many . How many . Stephen how many . Eight and a half. laughter stephen you must be really strong. You know like your grandfather who is bald, and he combs the hair over the bald part . Stephen yeah. laughter applause stephen all the way over . Wow. Wow stephen have you ever played scrabble . No. Stephen well, dont. Your parents say its fun, but its just competitive spelling with your cousins. Hey, did you hear about the special hugs that moms and dads do . Yeah, i saw a book about it once. Theres a lot of gruntin gruntid sweating, and when its all over, everybodys really happy, except my mother. laughter applause stephen yeah, i heard about all the grunting and the sweating. You know you know what they call it . Yeah, the heimlich. Stephen i heard they had to do it to my grandma at a restaurant. laughter cheers and applause stephen are you crying . Are you are you crying . Dont cry i hope she left a big tip. laughter stephen hey, are you gonna are you gonna watch the canac twohour commercial free season premiere this srd on nbc . bleep yeah. cheers and applause . Stephen David Duchovny, everybody. Well be right back with aaron tveit. whispers rocket nice to meet you today were going to talk about the allnew 2016 chevy cruze, but heres the catch. Youre only going to answer me in emojis. So, this cruze has builtin 4g lte wifi® with 24 gigs of data. Wow. message sent sfx strong it also comes with 24 months of siriusxm satellite radio. message sent sfx like, word, chevy. Thats the way to go. Pick the one emoji that sums up the car. A crystal ball. I can see the future. That was deep. Choose any two mcdonaldsing classics for five bucks. 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My next guest has starred on broadway, tv, and film in catch me if you can, graceland, and les miserables. His new show is called braindead. Please welcome aaron tveit thanks for being here. applause hi man, its rockin. Stephen isnt it a great band . Great band. Stephen nice to meet you. Youve done a fair amount of work on broadway at this point. I have, yes. Stephen and i understand youre presenting at the tonyss. I am presenting at the tony awards which im very very, excited about. Stephen this sunday. This sunday. Its kind of a crazy thing. When you start working at the theater, you watch the tony awards. Its a very fun thing every year. And then this thing happens where you say, i know people performing in the tonys. And then youre in a show and you get to perform. And now im presenting and i have friends nominated that im presenting. Its very surreal. Stephen does it make you nervous, like youre really performing on stage . Oh, im very nervous. Both times i performed on the tony awards i definitely might have had a flask with me so i could cut the edge a little bit. Its very nerveracking its a live thing. Stephen these people are here because we love you. This is an intervention. Thank you guy,s. Wow, we finally did it. Good. Stephen whats the most nerveracking part of it . You go out there and announce the names and say this guy won. This one will be okay. But im a little nervous, you know when you watch awards show and the people draw out who it is. They fumble with the envelope. The envelope. Ive never been nominated for a tony award, but i can sit there and imagine that probably theyre very nervous, so im just going to kind of preset my thumb on that thing, and pop it right over. Stephen just tear the bandaid right off. I dont want to prolong it. I try. Im a give. Stephen now you have a new show called braindead. Braindead. Stephen here on the cbs. Here on the cbs. Stephen and this was from the same people who created the good wife. It is. Stephen is this, like, a prestige drama . Are you like sexy lawyers who are fighting each other, anything like that . Its not a prestige drawm. Its a political satire comedy told through the lens of a horror film. laughter if that makes sense. Okay it makes sense because most of our politics is horrible. cheers and applause . So imagine this, imagine a world applause if you can imagine a world where space bugs have crashed on earth, and eaten politicians brains, and changed them if you could ever imagine that. Stephen wait a second. So alien creatures alien creatures. Stephen are these intelligent alien creatures . Well, we dont know. We dont know yet. Stephen but they eat the brains they eat the brains of politicians and radicalize them. Yeah. laughter . Stephen i have a little note here that says the First Episode is called the insanity principle. The insanity principle. Stephen what is the insanity principle. Its basically looking at the entire backdrop of our current political system is pretty much what its talking about. Stephen everyone seems insane. Everyone seems insane. And hopefully the bugs in and the comedy give us a view and explain and perhaps we can laugh at the absurdity together. Stephen why do the bugs eat only the politicians brains . Youll see there are rules. The bug, if they go into someones brain, if they try to fight it, their head explodes. So maybe the politicians, they dont have as much going on to up there to start. With. Theyre a little susceptible maybe. Stephen we have a clip and the two of you are on opposite sides of the political spectrum. We are. Stephen jim. I saw you in our waiting room trying to poach. Poaching, seriously. She only asked for my help because she knew you couldnt handle it. Would you stop following me. It looks like im collaborating with the democrats. Oh, about that prochoice rally what, are you wearing . Stephen thats cold. Zing. applause . Stephen do you do you personally subscribe to that there are aliens out there, that we have ever been visited by aliens . I do. Stephen so it doesnt scare you at all . Oh, no, its scary. I made the mistake of watching fire in the sky when air force a kid. Stephen whats fire in the sky. Its a ba guy who got abducted and remembered his whole experience through flash back. They put a probe down his throat. After i saw this movie i thought i was going to get abducted by aliens when i went to bed. And slept with my baseball bat next to my bed just in case. A part of me thought, an alien species coming to earth will be deterred by my baseball bat. Stephen did you ever swing out at mom and dad during the night . I was ready to go. No, thank goodness, i didnt. Stephen wow. Who knows . Stephen now you just carry the flask. Now i just carry the flask, yeah. Stephen you started acting at a fairly young age. I did. Stephen did you have to do the classic actor thing where you wait tables and suffer or did it just happen for you . I suffered in my own way. I think everybody kind of goes through their licks early on. But, no, i waited i worked in a restaurant kind of the summer before i got the big job that brought me to new york in my home town. I bartended most nights, but i waited tables one night a week and it was just not for me. I did not like it at all. Stephen how old are we talking about here . 21, 20, 21. Stephen i wanted to catch you there. You say bartender and i wondered if you broke the law. I might have. I definitely violated new york state liquor law s. Stephen thats it you . Never came to new york and worked the bars. I did two tours of two broadway shows, and the second one, the National Tour of hairspray right when the tour ended they moved me to the new york company. I actually was very lucky i moved to new york for a job. That is very, very lucky. Stephen i waited table for five years. I hate you. Im sorry to hear that. Stephen i mean that in the nicest possible way. I hate everyone who doesnt dnt have to wait tables. I was very lucky and somehow, miraculously, ive been able to keep it going. Stephen i hope you keep it going and good luck this sunday opening the envelope, thank you. Stephen braindead premieres monday at 10 00 on cbs, and hell be presenting on sunday at the tonys well be right back. applause hmmmmmm. Hmmmmm. [ dreams by beck ] hmmmmm. The turbocharged dream machine. The Volkswagen Golf gti. Named one of car and drivers 10best, 10 years in a row. I smbut ended up nowhere. A lot now i use this. The nicoderm cq patch with unique extended release Technology Helps prevent the urge to smoke all day. I want this time to be my last time. Thats why i choose nicoderm cq. Now you cant spell nutriam i right . T nut, i mean whose to say its pronounced nutriton, anyway . My mixes contain delicious nuts, specially blended for your optimal nutrition. Thats right, i just changed a word in the english dictionary, forever. Planters. Nutrition starts with nut. Yes, dear . Hey, honey . Youre washing that bakedon alfredo by hand,right . Yes, dear. Dish issues . Cascade platinum. Powers. Through. Your toughest stuckon food. So let your dishwasher be the dishwasher. This turned out great. Cascade. applause stephen hey, everybody. Welcome back. Were back here at the beautiful late show. People who watch the show might know that i enjoy sailing. Thats how i got on the cover of homeless sea captain monthly. Very proud of that. In the sailing world, theres no bigger race than the fabled americas cup. Its just like the stanley cup, but all the ice has melted and youre on a boat. Next year, theyre racing for the cup in bermuda, and i was recently invited to sail with team u. S. A. You cannot imagine how excited i was. Luckily, you dont have to imagine because i filmed it. Jim. Its been almost 100 years since the americas cup was last held in beautiful new york harbor. In may, the race made its triumphant return so i headed downtown to meet oracle team u. S. A. Captain, Jimmy Spithill, in freezing, torrential rain. What a gorgeous day for sailing. Is this good sailing weather, jimmy . This is fantastic. Stephen your accent kind of confuses me a bit. Where in america are you from, jimmy . Im from the deep south, brother. Stephen if you win a third americas cup championship, do you let you be an american citizen . Is that what this is about. Are you trying to skip the line . That would be nice. Stephen dont let donald trump know youre not from the united states. Hell kick you off the boat. Jimmy, what exactly are we doing today here in new york harbor on this beautiful, i would say middecember day. Were here for practice day of the americas cup world series series. Were racing the fastest boat in the world. Rain wing off and stick is on the boat. There are hydrofoils under the boat, its very, very fast. Stephen when it gets out of the water it takes off. Youll experience that on board. Youll literally have to really hold on quite type. Stephen now the americas cup has been called the observeraire death race, but because i am not a billionaire, theres nothing for me to worry about right. No, no, youre fine. Nothing to worry about. Stephen no guest has ever fallen off one of these boats, right . We had one guest, one famous guest, in san francisco, when we were running the same world series, and he departed the boat. But our chase boat picked him up. Stephen seriously, you didnt go back for him . Were racing. You think were going to go back . Stephen just wondering. Judge wondering. Tell my wife i love her. Lets do this thing. Bring it. Youre on. Stephen yeah. Check one, were rolling all right where do you want me . All right. Stephen i dont think any of these guys are american. laughter this is so relaxing. You can really taste the hepatitis. I can go for a chaser of rum, and maybe a Broad Spectrum antibiotic. Here we go stephen here we go. Stephen yeah, baby. What do you do with a drunken sailor what do you do way drunken sailor what do you do way drunken sailor early in the morning oh, yeah stephen did we win . Yeah. Stephen another good. Thank you very much. Youre welcome. Stephen thank you very much. Not a problem. Stephen for the love of god, ive got to get some dry pants. U. S. A. u. S. A. thanks to Jimmy Spithill and oracle team u. S. A. P good luck, guys. Well be right back with world luck, guys. Well be right back with World Champion juggler Alexander Koblikov. Im afraid so sir. Do it. How about now . I deserve this. You deserve to be fired. Four flavors, four shapes, cheetos mix ups. With tmobile and the incredible iphone, you can reach more people in more places than before. Whether youre at home in the basement, on the open road, or pulling the late shift at work. Youre more connected now, because tmobile doubled its lte coverage. And added extended range lte which reaches two times farther than before and is four times better in buildings. Right now, hook up the whole family with an iphone. Buy any iphone and get an iphone se free when you add a line. Never underestimate the power of energizer. Our longest lasting energizer max ever. Olive garden now offershen you catering delivery. Nt . We make the food and deliver it to your door. So you can enjoy whats important. , he gets a ready for you alert the second his room is ready. So he knows exactly when he can settle in and think big. And when josh thinks big you know what he gives . Ill give you everything ive got and then some. He gives a hundred and ten percent im confident this 10 can boost your market share. Look at that pie chart boom youve never seen a number like that you feel me lois . Im feeling you. Yeah you do lets do this watch out he just had a whole thimble full of coffee. Woot woot the ready for you alert, only at laquinta. Com. La. And now, making his Network Television debut, my next guest is one of the greatest jugglers in the world, currently performing with the big apple circus. Please welcome to the late show and to america, Alexander Koblikov applause cheers and applause applause cheers and applause stephen congratulations. Alexander koblikov can be seen at the big apple circus now until june 12. Well be right back. Thank you,,,,,,,,, late show. Come back next week, when my guests will be bill oreilly, daniel radcliffe, demi lovato, and nick jonas. Good night you captioning sponsored by cbs captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org reggie are you ready to have some fun feel the love tonight get your keyboard out and play along its about to get tight its the late, late show cheers and applause ladies and gentlemen, all the way from cornwall, u. K. , give it up for your host, the one, the