Transcripts For KGO Jimmy Kimmel Live 20170707

Jimmy thats very nice. Welcome. Hi, everyone. Im jimmy, im the host of the show. Thank you for watching. Thanks to each and every one of you for coming. I appreciate it. Thank you for clapping, thanks for everything. Hey, remember when donald trump said he would give up tweeting when he became president . That was funny. That was a good one. [ laughter ] the president woke up bright and early this morning, the day after what had to be his worst birthday ever. He woke up, walked down the hall to melanias bedroom, the door was locked. [ laughter ] so he went downstairs, punched sean spicer in the stomach, wrestled the phone out of his little pink hands and tweeted about this special investigation into him. You know yesterday we learned that the president is being investigated by a special counsel led by Robert Mueller for possible obstruction of justice. So this morning at 7 57 a. M. , trump tweeted, you are witnessing the single greatest witch hunt in american political history led by some very bad and conflicted people. Maga. [ laughter ] hes even making witch hunts great again. I dont know. I dont think witches play golf every weekend. The way well know trump is a witch is when the white house falls on top of him. [ laughter ] and we see his feet curl up. And while a lot of people are making fun, there is some question as to whether this might be a witch hunt. So joining us now from actually, where are you from, maam . [ cheers and applause ] hello jimmy where are you join us from . From witchburg. [ laughter ] jimmy witchburg . Where is witchburg . What state is that in . Florida. [ laughter ] jimmy okay, joining from us witchburg, florida, high prees tess of the Pagan Federation ab gaig shipton. Hello, abigail. Yes, bright blessings and merry meet. Jimmy right back at you. As you probably heard, President Trump is saying this investigation is a witch hunt. Is it a witch hunt . Oh, no, of course not. Ive been hunted. And its nothing like this. Jimmy okay, so that i guess that do you want to see how cold my tits are . [ laughter ] you can feel them. Jimmy no, thats okay, thank you. Okay, your loss. Blight blessings and merry meet again. Jimmy all right, thank you very much. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy so you heard it from a witch, this is not a witch hunt. Trumps later said the leak of this information to the press was, quote, outrageous, inexcusable, and illegal. So at the very least i think he just found his next campaign slogan. [ laughter ] outrageous put that on a hat, ill buy it. Meanwhile, one of americas next top diplomats, Dennis Rodman, is worming his way through north korea. Dennis rodman is in the middle of what is planned to be a fourday trip. And he brought gifts on this trip. He brought gifts for his bff kim jongun. This is what he brought. He brought a variety of soaps, you see wrapped in cellophane, which is crazy. He brought a mermaid jigsaw puzzle. He brought two nondescript number 91 jerseys. This looks like a very sad yard sale or a terrible flea market. [ laughter ] and two books. He brought wheres waldo and the art of the deal. I love that he brought kim jong un the art of the deal. As if he needs help negotiating. Negotiating with kim jongun goes like this. You do everything i say and i wont feed you to a boa constrict constrictor, is that a deal, mom . [ laughter ] wheres waldo they think is for kim jonguns daughter, who i think is 5 years old. They love american childrens books in north korea. Of course they adapt them to suit the north korean lifestyle. But the same books we have. Theres for instance good night un. [ laughter ] oh the places youll never go. [ laughter ] the very hungry caterpillar and millions of other people. [ laughter ] the caterpillars hungry because theres no food. It really is amazing Dennis Rodman and kim jongun are friends. Especially considering kim jongun doesnt speak english and Dennis Rodman doesnt speak english. [ laughter ] i dont know what theyre saying to each other. I dont know if trump has read wheres waldo but i have to say i feel like he has. Because ive noticed that when he gives a speech he always seems to be reading it aloud. Wheres leo . Is leo around here . Where is he . Hes got to be here. Where is he . Where is franklin . Hes around. Where is robert . Wheres jim . Where are they . Where is general flynn . Where are you guys . Where is kim . Where is she . Where are they . Where are you . Wheres cecil . Where are they . Where is bruce . Jimmy you know they say sometimes the person you were looking for was right in front of you the whole time. [ laughter ] and while Dennis Rodman is in north korea, this is whats happening in south korea. This from a mixed martial arts heavyweight fight in seoul that got testy, literally. [ speaking Foreign Language ]. Jimmy hes looking around like, did anyone see that . [ applause ] we did see it. This morning in oakland, hundreds of thousands of people lined up starting at 4 00 a. M. For a parade for the Golden State Warriors. While the series might be over some of the players are still going at it. Draymond green of the warriors, he was here with us last night, draymond is one of the great trash talkers in the nba. Today he did some trash wearing. He wore a tshirt that says quickie. Which the cavaliers play at the quicken loans arena and the warriors beat them in five games. Hence the quickie. So lebron james saw this and he posted to instagram, thats what she said. And some emojis. [ laughter ] then draymond came back an hour later, he wrote about lebrons new hairlessness, them ws finally made him go bald. Congrats, king james. You know theres only one way this ends and its with sex, right . [ laughter ] while were on the subject of shenanigans, this is either a really good prank or a bad one. Ill let you be the judge. This is from the magical midway Amusement Park in orlando. They have one of those slingshot rides. The guy operating the ride decided to have some fun. Right before it started he told the couple to fasten their seat belts even though this is a ride that does not have seat belts. And thats when hilarity ensued. Tighten your seat belts. Who, him . It slipped off. Youve got to tighten it. Pull on it. Oh my gosh. Pull it from the bottom. Like a car seat belt. Pull on it this . Wait. Is mine too loose . Actually, both of them. Hey, i got both seat belts completely loose. [ screaming ] mama [ screaming ] [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy i dont know. Wow. Thats i need to find if anyone knows that guy, on the off chance hes still alive, please tell him im looking for him. Because i have to know. Sometimes i just like to get to know people, honestly. The next great space race is on the way. A team of german scientists is working on a project called bake in space. Their plan is to attempt to bake bread in outer space. Theyre hoping to do it sometime next year. They say their goal is to address the scientific and technical challenges related to the production of fresh bread in space. Apparently its hard to bake bread in space. Which ill be honest, i thought baking in space was a euphemism for smoking weed on the roof. [ laughter ] i didnt know they were doing any of that. Its an interesting goal. Not only has the idea of baking bread in space inspired the scientific community, it also got creative juices flowing here in hollywood and is breathing muchneeded life into the space action genre. The missions primary goal has been achieved. Were looking at the first proof of bread. Beyond earth. Its beautiful. Aggh whats going on . Aahhh weve lost all communication. Aahh [ cheers and applause ] jimmy its arma guillermo, did you understand what was going on there . Guillermo yeah, i did. Jimmy what was going on there . Guillermo the bread was moving. [ laughter ] jimmy right. Youre hammered, arent you . Im looking at you right now. Guillermo yeah, yeah. Jimmy you are, yeah. How many drinks did you have before the show . Guillermo two big ones. Jimmy two big ones. Guillermo yeah. Jimmy two big ones. All right. All right, thursday night, that means its time to bleep and blur the big tv moments of the week whether they need it or not. Weve got two big ones for you. Its this week in unnecessary censorship. This morning a close friend of President Trumps says that he is considering [ bleep ]ing Robert Mueller. It has been absolutely extraordinary. That saying, i cant remember the last time i had so much [ bleep ] up my ass but there is no more room. Mr. Sessions, are you familiar with what spies call tradecraft . [ bleep ] you, senator cotton. Did you say that i had to [ bleep ] kevin durant . Yeah. It really wasnt that hard. Can you call draymond for me . I want to ride on his [ bleep ]. Its not easy for someone whos a [ bleep ], [ bleep ], like myself or yourself once or twice a day. Many times i stick a butter bean up my [ bleep ]. They always came out. I think the president i know because he and i have [ bleep ]ed a little bit. When was the last time you [ bleep ]ed . Last night. Wait a minute, last night . Yeah. Why are you keeping these girls prisoners, jerk . You dont understand. I [ bleep ] princesses because i want to marry one. Whyd you [ bleep ] six of them if you just want to marry one . Im [ bleep ]ing them all first to be sure i made the right choice. Parades, picnics, [ bleep ]s. Yeah, you did it again. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy were going to take a break. When we come back, in honor of fathers day on sunday, we asked people to tell their dads the worst thing they have ever done, and they did. So stick around, well share that together. [ cheers and applause ] dicky Abcs Jimmy Kimmel live, brought to you by aflac. Swing. Y huh . Dont you mean dad kind of ruined our hawaii fund . I thud go to the thothpital. There goes the airfair. I dont think Health Insurance will cover all. Of that. Buth my fathe without that cash from aflac we might have to choose between hawaii or your face. Hawaii what . Haha. Hawaii you might have less coverage than you think. Visit aflac. Com and keep your lifestyle healthy. Aflac new deep hydrating eye gel with hyaluronic acid born to outperform the 1. Prestige eye cream for better hydration. And your best look yet. Olay eyes collection. Ageless. Grooves in your sandwich . Do you always put cheezit of course theyre chips. Chips. Plus sandwich equals the perfect lunch. Ooooh. Dont forget the pickle. Its kind of a big dill. Cheezit grooves. Chips made with 100 real cheese. Dang right its a chip and now im sure its more than a stroke of luck yeah, i love you, do you love me, too . Yeah, i love you, do you love me, too . Clap your hands if it feels good clap your hands, ohh clap your hands if it feels good clap your hands, ooh feeling tonight, some kinda wonderful feeling inside, some kinda wonderful [brother] any last words . [boy] karma, danny. Karma [vo] progress is seizing the moment. Your summer moment awaits you, now that the summer of audi sales event is here. Audi will cover your first months lease payment on select models during the summer of audi sales event. Jimmy welcome back to the show. Andy samberg, jillian bell, music from 2chainz, trey songz and Ty Dolla Sign. Fathers day is almost here. Which means you only have a couple days to find a tastefully masculine Fidget Spinner or whatever [ laughter ]. If you havent picked out a gift, let me save you some time. Sunday give your father what he really wants, an extra 20 minutes of ipad toilet time, thats all, its enough. [ laughter ] if you really want to make the most of fathers day i invite you to take part in our annual youtube challenge. We have a longstanding tradition now of making fathers day mischief. Weve asked one year we asked kids to serve their dads breakfast the hard way. Heres your breakfast. I get breakfast . Hey geez. What the heck is that . Aah jimmy we asked people to spray dad with a hose one year. Hey, dad. [ bleep ] what are you doing . Aah [ bleep ] jimmy another year we told people to play catch with dad with something other than a ball. We got some creative responses to that. Hey, dad, catch. [ bleep ] damn it jimmy kimmel said to do it is jimmy yeah. If you need to blame me, go right ahead. I dont mind. This years challenge, its not physical, its a verbal challenge. I want you to sneak up on your dad and when he least expects it yell i love you, dad as loud as you can. Do this whenever and wherever you want. Be sure that, a, you surprise him and, b, you do not injure him in any way. Do not do this while hes driving, while hes being wheeled into heart surgery, none of those things. [ laughter ] otherwise record yourself yelling i love you dad and post to it youtube with the title hey jimmy kimmel i told my dad i love him. Its going to be very sweet. Look for a message from us. Well put the best ones on the show next week. And you know, id say as much as most of us love our fathers, we keep secrets from them. And everyone knows that honesty is the best policy. So we went out on the street and we asked kids to tell us the worst thing they ever did, while their dad was standing right next to them. This is how that went. Whats the worst thing youve done that youve never told your dad . Probably when i got in trouble by using bad words. What bad words . Like the fword. Whats the fword . I cant tell you. You can tell me. [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] how do you feel about that . Not too good. [ laughter ] tell your dad the worst thing youve ever done. I went to a party and i got really messed up and i had to walk line 10 miles home. Oh, that scares you to walk the 10 miles home, though. I got chased by the well, it wasnt like the police but it was like the Security Guard at the mall. Ive gotten chased multiple times. You have not. I have. Oh my gosh. When my friends over and stuff, we do a lot of prank calls. Prank calls . Who do you call . We call walgreens, we call like almost like every store. What do you say . Poke butt. You sell vanilla biscuit . And what else . I think i pooped. A while ago he had these bluetooth ear buds. And i sold them on the internet. You sold them . For how much . 20 bucks. Seriously . I wondered where they were, too. Watched a rated r movie. Snuck out. He didnt know. Smoked weed. Shrooms. Happy fathers day [ cheers and applause ] jimmy maybe he should have stopped at 12 kids. We have a good show tonight. We have music from 2 chainz with trey songz and Ty Dolla Sign. Julian bell is here. Well be right back with andy samberg [ cheers and applause ] dicky portions of Jimmy Kimmel Live are brought to you by kfc. Its Finger Lickin good. Youre not taking these. Hey, hey, hey youre not taking those. Whoa, whoa youre not taking that. Come with me. Youre not taking that. Youre not taking that. Youre not taking that. Mom, im taking the subaru. Dont be late. Even when were not there to keep them safe, our Subaru Outback will be. vo love. Its what makes a subaru, a subaru. Discover card. Hooh, youre real . . You know im real at discover, were always here to talk. Good, cause i dont have time for machines. Some Companies Just dont appreciate the power of conversation you know, i like you i like you too at discover, we treat you like youd treat you. Get the it card and talk to a real person. You have. Bug eyes [intern] i have some terrible news. Theyre destroying the whole town the Energy Conscious whopeople among usle . Say small actions can add up to something. Humongous. A little thing here. A little thing there. Starts to feel like a badge maybe millions can wear. Who are all these caretakers, advocates too . Turns out, its californians its me and its you. Dont stop now, its easy to add to the routine. Join Energy Upgrade california and do your thing. Jimmy hi there, welcome back to the show. Tonight from the new movie rough night, jillian bell is here. And then his album comes out tomorrow. Its called pretty girls like trap music. 2 chainz featuring trey songz and Ty Dolla Sign from the mercedesbenz stage. They have something very theatrical planned, they really put something together. Next week we have a whole week of new shows with elle fanning, casey affleck, tatiana maslany, chris hardwick, paul w. Downs, allison tollman, sir anthony hopkins, music from playboi carti, and queen with adam lambert singing lead. So that will be a lot of fun, please join us for all of that next week. [ cheers and applause ] our first guest is an emmy and golden globewinning american citizen with a very funny new mockumentary about racing bicycles on drugs, its called tour de pharmacy. You seem very, very proud of your homeland. Indeed i am, you know, i miss it. Being here in france, i miss it back home. I bless the rains down in africa. Right, right, like the song. Oh, im not familiar with that. Its the lyrics to the toto song africa. Im not familiar with that. But at any rate. Its going to take a lot to to drag me away from you. From you. Thats what i was going to say. We can do it in harmony. Thats so bizarre. I was going to say drag away from this great interview. Jimmy tour de pharmacy premieres july 8th on hbo. Please welcome andy samberg. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy you look great. Yes jimmy the glasses. The glasses are yours. Yes. Jimmy yeah. Is that a bandaid . Adhering your nose to your face . Well, i finally did it, i got the nose job. [ laughter ] jimmy who is your doctor . He did a beautiful job. I left it on because i just wanted to see if anyone noticed the difference. Jimmy well, yeah, we all noticed, so you can rest easy. Surprise [ laughter ] jimmy how are you doing . Whats going on with you . Im great. Jimmy youre good, everythings good in your life . Yeah, wonderful, i feel happy. Ive got to say, though. Craziest thing. I dvrd the oscars. Jimmy oh . And i just watched it last night [ laughter ] jimmy really. Jimmy, that was crazy. They got best picture wrong [ laughter ] jimmy wait a minute, you you must have been freaking out have you been talking about it a lot . Have you had to talk about it a lot . Jimmy i did mention it, yeah. I was in my house like, no its moonlight [ laughter ] the la la land people must have been so embarrassed. Have you talked about it a lot . Jimmy i did, yeah. I mentioned it. Because i just watched it last night. Jimmy it was actually a good while ago. I dont want to ruin anything for you. Yeah. Jimmy you know i know youre from the bay area. I am. Jimmy the nba finals are also over. That i watched. Jimmy and your Golden State Warriors won the nba finals. Yes. Yes. Yes [ cheers and applause ] jimmy are you a big fan . Im a huge warriors fan. Jimmy oh, wow. And look. I know it sucks for everyone else. Like no one from the bay is like yeah, its fair were just like the warriors were bad for so long. And i watched the warriors my whole life. Jimmy yeah. And like really watched them. Ive been a fan for a long time. And now its like, we watched them get beat down by shaq and kobe. Beat down by the spurs with all their allstars and stuff. Its like, now its our turn not to be embarrassed. Jimmy to beat people down. People do get upset about it not being fair but theres not a team in the league that wouldnt swap lineups, really. Everybody would want to be in the same position. Even lebron has been saying like oh, yeah, i get it. Jimmy do you think lebron i would think he would because he did the same thing when he went to miami. Right . Your words, not mine. Im biased. Obviously im biased. Jimmy did you play sports . Basketball or whatnot . I wanted to play football. And my mom said no. Jimmy oh. Because i was super dinky. I played soccer, played a lot of soccer. Jimmy gotcha. Yeah. Yeah, most popular sport in the world, america. [ applause ] jimmy you know youre not that popular when you have to keep reminding people youre the most popular sport in the world. Its like David Hasselhoff telling people hes huge in germany, kind of that same thing. [ laughter ] yeah, yeah. You think he goes around just saying that . Jimmy i dont think he probably has ever said that in his life. I unfairly attributed that to him. I like to think he does. Im huge in germany oh, okay. Jimmy i think its something we all know. By the way, ive checked this out with germans before. We have many germans that will come to the show. He is popular over there. He is. Jimmy its a real thing. Its a phenomenon that cant necessarily be explained. Good for him. Jimmy yeah, well sure, great for him. Its like the Dennis Rodman of north korea. Hes that determined. Yeah. [ laughter ] but jimmy, David Hasselhoff, would you . [ laughter ] jimmy would it be wrong to say i have . Oh sweet [ laughter ] jimmy this is baywatch, you know. What did you do over the summer when you were a kid . What kind of summers did you have as a young man . I was a summer camp kid. Jimmy you were . Yeah, i started out as a camper, went there for so long that i then became a counselor. Jimmy was it a good camp . It was wonderful. It was in yosemite. Beautiful. Bass lake. Jimmy how did they decide which of the kids going there for a long time get to be counselors . Kind of the ones that just wont stop coming. [ laughter ] it was interesting for me because you know, theres activities during the day, theres like someone who does the softball, someone who does archery, people do sailing. And i had no skill set. So they made up a job for me. I was campfire coordinator. [ laughter ] jimmy what did that entail . What were your responsibilities . At the end of every day theres a campfire where the whole camp comes together and you sing songs and do skits and stuff. Jimmy would you pick the songs . Yeah, id be like lets do John Jacob Jingleheimer schmidt again im getting paid [ laughter ] jimmy and would you arrange the smores and that sort of thing, light the fire . No, i would not do well with that. [ laughter ] jimmy you were the campfire coordinator, you did not light the fire . No. No food services, no. [ laughter ] jimmy and do you have still did you have like a girlfriend or anything at camp . Were there girls at the camp . It was like there was hookup stuff happening at camp. One of my well, it didnt always go great for me. [ laughter ] one year i went. And look, i had grown my hair pretty long that year. Like below the shoulders. And im from berkeley. All my friends were into reggae. I noticed one day i had sort of stopped brushing my hair and it started kind of matting up and and i was like, yeah, lets see where this goes. [ laughter ] and it started kind of grossly dreading. And i went to camp. The school year ended, i went to camp. All my friends were like, oh. Dreads. [ laughter ] and i was like, kind of, i dont know. And it went on for a couple of days. Finally they were like, this is not happening, and they kind of like held me down and shaved my head. And i was kind of bummed and i was like, man, i cant believe they shaved my white dreads. [ laughter ] and then that night i made out with a girl. Jimmy oh, wow [ cheers and applause ] it was good luck. I was like i am the poster child for why white people should not have dreadlocks. Just never should happen. Jimmy like the opposite of samson in a way. Yeah. Jimmy that particular situation. Like an inverted samson. Jimmy by the way, youve done it again with your mockumentary. The last one was about tennis and i loved that, that was great. This one now is about bicycle racing. Yes. Jimmy and its very, very funny. Talk about some of the people that are in it just to start with. Its a crazy stacked cast, you guys. Jimmy yeah. Everyone will be in everything now. Its me, Orlando Bloom, john cena, daveed diggs from hamilton, freddie highmore, jeff goldblum, dolph lundgren, mike tyson, james marsden, julia ormond, flphyllisia rashad. Who am i forgetting . Jimmy jon hamm is the narrator. Yeah. Jon hamm is the narrator. We got edgar wright to do the voice of an announcer, thats kind of hidden, not anymore. Jimmy theres a guy i know named chris romano whose penis i got to see. Yes. Jimmy its a very penisheavy project. We believe in equal opportunity nudity in our projects. [ laughter ] jimmy right off the bat, Orlando Bloom, theres a yeah. Jimmy yeah. Theres a bit in the beginning with orlando where, you know, cyclists actually do go pee while they ride, thats a thing, because they cant stop. We were like, this will be so funny, well start with orlandos character, juju pepe, hes like an italian cyclist [ laughter ] like hell start going pee and it will be crazy, like Orlando Bloom showing his [ bleep ], thats so crazy and we shot it and everyone was laughing. This is like so awesome, people are going to be so shocked. And then like a week after we wrapped shooting, like a thousand photos of Orlando Bloom with his [ bleep ] out. [ laughter ] like paddleboarding around with katy perry came out. And we were like, you ruined it you ruined the joke of your wang [ laughter ] now its like oh, yeah, he does that, thats his thing. So we cut it way down. The joke, not his [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy very considerate of you. Its very funny. Its called tour de pharmacy. It premieres july 8th on hbo. Andy samberg, everybody well be right back. Dicky on july 7th, 8th and 9th go to jimmykimmellivemusic. Com to see streaming performances and behindthescenes interviews from artists like big sean, dnce, and steve aoki at summerfest, presented by u. S. Cellular. Go to jimmykimmellivemusic. Com and sign up now. Ging the sink, setting up dentist appointments and planning birthday parties, nobody does it better. Shes also in a rock band. Look at her shred. But when it comes to mortgages, shes less confident. Fortunately for maria, theres Rocket Mortgage by quicken loans. Its simple, so she can understand the details and be sure shes getting the right mortgage. Apply simply. Understand fully. Mortgage confidently. Get, get, shooo hey out out get, get, get arrrrrgh did you find everything okay, sir. . panting whaaaaat. . Have a good day, sir what does life look like during your period . With tampax pearl. 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Can we go try it . Welcome to k. F. C. Welcome to k. F. C. What would you like to order . What would you like to order . Your 5 fillups famous bowl. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Youll never guess how much it costs. 5 . Yes yes. Thank you. Do you like chicken . Do you like chicken . Yes. Prove it by doing your best chicken impression. Pacac ooh oui. Da, da, da, da. Can i get a twopiece fillup . Were out of chicken. How bay bucket full of napkins . Im just joking. We have so much chicken we dont know what to do with it. Happy National Fried chicken day. Do we win a prize . Every order comes with a free hat. Thank you. Enjoy. I get this for me now. Celebrate National Fried chicken day by eating fried chicken. Go to kfc. Its Finger Lickin good. Ine and choose whats right for you. Woah. Flo and jamie here to see hqx. Flo and jamie request entry. Slovakia. Triceratops. Tapioca. Racquetball. Staccato. Me llamo jamie. Pumpernickel. Pudding. Employee hey, guys home quote explorer. 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Oh well thats nice and checking your score wont hurt your credit. Oh im so proud of you. Well thank you. Free at at discover. Com creditscorecard, even if youre not a customer. Jimmy hello there. Still to come, music from 2 chainz. You know our next guest from curb your enthusiasm, workaholics, 22 jump street, and eastbound down. Starting tomorrow, she presides over Scarlett Johanssons very bad Bachelorette Party in rough night. Before we go, you have to do a human friendipede. What is a human friendipede . Its a photo we always take where its like the Human Centipede where theyre sewn together mouth to bum but its with friends so its special. I feel like it might not be appropriate. If i dont post a ton of pictures from this weekend its going to look suspicious, like we killed someone. Okay. I cant believe im saying this but i think we should do the human friendipede. Okay. I get the middle who would want the middle . Jimmy please welcome jillian bell [ cheers and applause ] wow. Wow. Jimmy something weird, andy samberg had a nose that looked just like that. Thats crazy, i did see that earlier. He got a nose job or something. Im just a genuine witch. No, im going to take this off now and be a human being. Hi jimmy you should be a human being. How are you doing . By the way, i just want to tell you something. And i know this wont mean much to most everyone. But i was excited to learn that you were from las vegas because i am from las vegas. We are both from las vegas. Jimmy and i get excited when other people from las vegas, you know, become popular. And you have done that. Well, thank you. Jimmy how did you do that from las vegas . How did you because most people go to las vegas to end their careers. [ laughter ] rather than to begin them. Right, right. I started early. I did improv at 8 years old, which is really weird. Jimmy what is an 8yearold improv set like . Im like, give me a place, give me a no. No, we just played around. I had sort of a wild imagination. And i think my parents sort of wanted to get me out of the house for a bit because i was a lot. [ laughter ] jimmy i see. But yeah, i ended up really loving it. And kept taking improv class. Have you had the experience that ive had where when you grow up in las vegas, you dont know its weird that youre growing up in las vegas . Zero idea. Jimmy until you move and then everybody goes, you grew up in las vegas . What was that like . Which hotel did you live in . [ laughter ] jimmy exactly. Im like, it was a motel. [ laughter ] yeah, no, its very odd. I mean, i always thought that Grocery Stores had slot machines in them. Jimmy its true. There are slot machines in the Grocery Stores. Every 7eleven has a slot machine. Yeah, for prom i went to blue man group. [ laughter ] jimmy you did. Yeah, i thought that was a normal thing. Dinner and a show. What show did you go to for prom . Everyones like what . Jimmy yeah, prom would be not that i ever went. But im told you didnt go . Jimmy no. Would you well, we dont have jimmy it wasnt a choice. Dont worry, im over it, okay . [ laughter ] hes so cool. Hes so cool. Youre doing great. Jimmy no, it wasnt about being cool, it was about being unattractive. [ laughter ] but prom would be held at like Caesars Palace or something. Yes, yeah. I actually worked at Caesars Palace. Jimmy where did you work there . I worked at this place called banana republic, heard of it . Jimmy yes, i have. I was a greeter. So i would be like welcome to banana republic. In just so many different ways all day long. Jimmy they have Department Stores now. We didnt have that back in those days. Did you go to buffets and stuff with your parents . Oh, yeah. My dad did advertising for the orleans casino. Wed hit that up. I would just have a plate of shrimp. I dated a lot. [ laughter ] jimmy so you would get to go to the orleans buffet for free, was that the thing . Yeah. My dad had a stamp well, everyone had a comp to everything in las vegas. Jimmy yeah. In those days they did. I think that has changed now. Yeah, no, you cant get into anything now. Jimmy we went to see siegfried and roy for free in las vegas when i was a kid. Oh. Jimmy that was a rare moment where my dad like got something. Because that was the only time wed ever go anyplace is if there were some free, like 99 cent anything over 99 cents in las vegas is unacceptably expensive. [ laughter ] yeah. When you started to have to pay for parking your car, were like, what is happening . Because everything was free. Jimmy right. Valet parking is yeah. I think theyre changing that in las vegas. They are. Boo jimmy its all very sad. Shame on you jimmy i know, its not enough that you give that money anyway into the casino. Absolutely. Jimmy when you went in there. Even the supermarkets you have change in your hand, you just put it in the machine. You just play a slot. Jimmy you didnt have to carry your change around like an animal. [ laughter ] well, this is so great. Now youre in this big movie with all these by the way, are you an impressionist . Do you do impressions . I do a couple. Jimmy who do you do . I can do drew barrymore, and i can do kate mckinnon. Jimmy oh, really . Kate mckinnon is new. Yeah, i can only do two jimmy so youre not an impressionist. Kate mckinnon is an impressi impressionist. She is. Jimmy you do an impression of an impressionist. Thats very meta in a way. Do a little of that. I dont know if we have a sense of what kates if you see her in interviews, she does sort of like wow. A lot of this. Its sort of yeah. Uh wow. And im so happy to be here. Uh a lot of that. Jimmy does she like when you do that . I dont know. Well find out. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy im going to guess not. Maybe not. Jimmy its funny you do that. I think i always felt when she was doing that, she was maybe doing an impression doing a character. That is her. Jimmy of somebody we dont know. I know. Jimmy did you do relatives and stuff like that growing up . Oh, my nana was pretty good. She was romanian. She was actually this is her word. She said she was the first woman to ever be behind the front desk of a las vegas casino. Jimmy oh, really . Yeah, and i believe it was Caesars Palace or something. Jimmy oh, wow. Yeah. Jimmy thats pretty crazy. Theres no way to verify it. No. Somebody look into it. Jimmy so she was the first woman allowed to greet people as they came in and check them in . Yeah, and she was quite a character. She was like leather pants at christmas dinner. Jimmy oh, really. And fake enhancements. Jimmy she would wear that to your house . Oh, yeah. Jimmy oh, really . Oh, yeah. Shed walk in on my grandparents that were older and shed be like like making fun of them. Because she was so cool. Jimmy vegas, turns out it is a weird place to grow up. It is a weird place. Jimmy even nana has breast implants. [ laughter ] she does. Jimmy its great to have you here. Congratulations. Thank you so much. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy the movie is called rough night. It opens tomorrow. Jillian bell, everybody well be right back with 2 chainz [ cheers and applause ] dicky the Jimmy Kimmel Live Concert Series is presented by mercedesbenz. The best or nothing. [brother] any last words . [boy] karma, danny. Karma [vo] progress is seizing the moment. Your summer moment awaits you, now that the summer of audi sales event is here. Audi will cover your first months lease payment on select models during the summer of audi sales event. Jimmy the Jimmy Kimmel Live Concert Series is presented by mercedesbenz. The best or nothing. Jimmy thanks to andy samberg, jillian bell, apologies to matt damon, we did run out of time for him. Nightline is next but first, his new album pretty girls like trap music is out tomorrow. Here with the song its a vibe, with help from the trap choir, trey songz and ty dolla ign, 2 chainz [ cheers and applause ] yeah yeah yeah thats a vibe she wanna vibe thats a vibe yeah uh thats a vibe its a vibe thats a vibe yeah yeah yeah oh thats a vibe oh its a vibe thats a vibe yeah yeah thats a vibe she wanna vibe yeah thats a vibe yeah yeah yeah yeah thats a vibe she wanna vibe thats a vibe this vibe yeah yeah late night oh its a vibe let me slide oh its a vibe yeah yeah its a vibe dont you like your drippin gushin drippin down your thighs its a vibe get high diggin deep while im lookin in your eyes vibe is the realest i know you feel it its a vibe different vibe this my vibe all the ladies like it okay so i got the ambiance just where i want it and if you get paid its solely based on your performance my ego is enormous like my crib in california if you aint got no heart man you gonna need a donor now i said im from the corner of the atl where we got that clientele avoid paper trails got a vibe make a young chick turn her neck got a vibe make a cougar wanna spend a check got a vibe make an asian want hibachi got a vibe make italian want versace carbon copies get declined im the pioneer beat that thing up i need riot gear any volunteers gas in a ziploc now thats loud and clear this one outta here this is our year thats a vibe thats a vibe thats a vibe oh thats a vibe yeah yeah thats a vibe its a vibe its a vibe thats a vibe yeah yeah its a vibe am i your type tight maybe ill spend the night yeah yeah zmoet thats a vibe whats up thats a vibe its a vibe thats a vibe oh its a vibe yeah yeah you know my type my money ripe yeah, yeah album jumping tonight you know my type my money right album jumping tonight, yeah, yeah [ cheers and applause ] this is nightline. Tonight, the business of babies. Okay. Couples eager to have children competing to win in vitro fertilization. Too expensive for many. 20,000 for the fresh cycle. What you need to know about the financial stakes if youre considering fertility treatments. And the lucky winners after years of heartache whose dreams have finally come true. Plus, shamed on a plane. You know nothing about me by the size of my body. A plussize model confronting a man she says tried to body shame her on an airplane. He says it looks like shes eat ayn whole mexican. Posting the whole showdown on social media for her over 100,000 followers. Why