Transcripts for KFAX 1100 AM [AM 1100 K-F-A-X] KFAX 1100 AM [AM 1100 K-F-A-X] 20170825 200000

And it was kind of like when I think of like the connotes this in the desert in all the things that you see. The patterns in scripture that that kind of. Thing and sort of I'm on the right track because the pattern is that I know more and I know less and then when I started in that's kind of the faith but you know Abraham stepped out not knowing where he was going in the wrong stuff like that so the other thing I found out was we tend to over estimate. Blocks of time in terms of it seems like a long time as you know took a month away from radio and in things in in it's just amazing how fast the blocks of time where you have things planned that you can get you know I did so in time you'll overestimate what you do in a year and drastically underestimate what you accomplished in in 3 years and I would say the one who has that home doing housework I have never seen understood how you can do so little and so much time until you try to do it there is it's just amazing how few things you can get done right in a day especially if you have relationships that you're trying to build and develop There's just no time part hope that was helpful to you thanks for sharing that Henry 1800 new life if you need some help we got 13 rules for effective communication are free to do you will be listening to a Classic program from the archives of new life live to order any of the resources mentioned on today's program called 1800 new black boys will be right back. To take your life back workshop is coming to Washington d.c. September 8th through that this week it has been a chance to honestly share my feelings and begin ownership of them whether they're positive or negative I learned how to stand up for myself it's very it's positive feelings that I hadn't experienced before Steve Barber and Dr Dave stoop will teach you how. Take charge of your past and your current circumstances so you can look forward with confidence and faith to the road ahead this weekend has been just the beginning of taking my life. A renewed power to chess on a daily basis a commitment to move forward in my recovery by continually taking my life back to register to find out more call 1800 new life that's 186395433 or online at New Life dot com If you really want to take your life back then I would highly recommend take your life back 1800 n e w l i f e. And welcome back to this classic program from the archives of new life lies to make a tax deductible gift or to order any of the products mentioned on today's program called 1800 new life now back to the boys. Are back Stephen are here and we have a resource for you and I hope that you will order this resource especially if someone has ever said to you Lone Ranger it's making small groups work and part of making a small group work is you being a great small group person participant and part of this book talks about how to make it work from your perspective even if you don't believe it but if you've been wondering about how do you lead a book group here's a book that will help you learn to lead our show you whether or not you can lead a group but it's very very simple and very profound and I hope you'll call us at 1800 new life and order a copy of John Henry's newest book Making small groups work they can also show you just as a group member the kinds of things the group members can be doing in a group to take it deeper than a news yeah. Can I say yeah yeah. Not exactly what you said when I turned but we have a small group here we confront each other so young did you have a point you'd like to make that would further sell your book now just listening to you know right so. Was that it's it's it's a part of the whole idea that if you're not in some kind of small group setting where you are faced with yourself and people love even know what's really going your life there's a problem look at there's a problem because that's really the norm you. Call it 100 new life making small groups work what every small group leader needs to know and what every group participant needs to know it is from Dr John Townsend Dr Henry Cloud and I think you'll really like this they are great writers and there's a lot of scripture a lot of depth here in this book to call us at 1800 new life Jamie from Martin's bird Virginia w a b a hi Jamie welcome to new life Hi Hi there I'm a little bit nervous this is my 1st time calling but I have a question and it's something that's bothering my husband and I's relationship pretty much Ok. I'm slightly overweight my husband I've been married for 5 years and in the past 5 years I've had 6 pregnancies 2 children 4 miscarriages Wow. And then I'm carrying extra weight from all this and my husband is not happy with my weight. He we got into a pretty pretty he heated discussions about this quite a bit and he thinks he sees it from the point of view that if I love him then I should care enough about what he thinks how I should look and I should lose the weight for him. And. I'm cold conflict and by this I've joined a gym I've been on diets you know I'm not I'm not huge Well how much do you weigh and how tall are I 510 and I weigh 230 Ok. What what would you weigh if you thought you were just about right for you and him. Like my dream weight would be like 180 and my goal weight is just to get under 200 k. He doesn't know how much I weigh. So he wants you to lose weight you want to lose weight but you don't like it that he's telling you lose it if you love Him Yeah I think that cause the spirit I think you still love me unconditionally. No matter what how much that way but I've I heard him say he doesn't Jamie I heard him or heard you say to us that he said if you love him that you would do it and you haven't said anything about his not loving you that so that didn't seem part of the part of the equation has he said that I don't love you if you you know he does he have that right at the very loves you unconditionally Oh it just doesn't approve or desire your way right right right right is that a hard thing Jane Jane before we get to the particulars of what's wrong here in the relationship are you open to not just from his direction but yours as well that. That God for example loves us unconditionally but he does want to change things about us for his benefit Yeah I agree with that Ok so you're not opposed to the idea that a husband or a wife could love their spouse and want them to change something for their benefit I create with that right Ok Ok so how does it get into why did you say then you think he should love you unconditionally. I just I guess I feel like the way he approaches the topic he kind of puts that demand on me to do it because they're frustrated with when I've just recently in the past 2 months joined a gym and he doesn't see. Result Yeah I've lost 8 pounds too much and that's not enough for him I mean it Ok so so we're really not talking about it that way does she what we're talking about is a process between you guys of how you how you saw a normal marital thing which is you love each other in his Hebrew since you spur each other's dispose of the word spur each other on to good works in other words that there what happens in any good relationship is that you love each other and you push to push each other in a different you know in a good direction right right and that process isn't working here and. Probably isn't working in some other use would be my guess right Ok let me let me make that the problem in getting off the way. Ok. I mean it I guess the thing that hurts me the most of the way. You know the things that he attacks me on I guess that's what hurt me the most because I'm internally battling not myself Ok look right and that's that's kind of my point that I would want you to talk to him about look you know I want to lose weight I want to grow I want to be able to tell you where you need to grow let's talk about how we talk to each other about the areas we struggle with because the way you're doing it really is driving me away and turning me that's kind of that's kind of to the point I guess that we're out. And can't really I don't know how to explain it but that's the kind of conversation that we just recently had and I told him I said you're hurting me when you talk to me this way and he's a good Christian man and I mean he doesn't Jamie have you given him ways to talk to you don't hurt he might need that I have and what he said I said you know I started going back to the way to start of that I said I would prefer your encouragement like say. You know good job I can tell you're working hard and go into that yeah but see Jamie that's good but that's only half the picture when when he mentioned that passage in Hebrews we are supposed to confront each other too and so I wonder if you're painting him into a corner where all he can do is be a cheerleader and say Way to go and not be able to say when he's frustrated or he sees a problem or are concerned that he can't say something's wrong here it sounds like he might be experiencing what you're saying all you can do is say positive you can say thing negative and you need the negative too but in loving turns right and we're not saying that he's right either right but let me say this if your husband identity was all caught up in his job and his work and it was just to you was and he just was that was his life and he was working 80 in 90 hours a week you would feel very good I think about saying to him there is something in your life they are doing to the excess that's hurting our relationship and I need for you to find a way to restrain your behavior. Ok this is kind of similar to that that we have to be free to share with each other excesses that we see and ask for an improvement. But Jamie. I don't hear that as a negotiation right what you're saying which is the way that he does that is very hurtful to you. Right but then her that's what we that's what we want to empower you to go address with him because that can be a source of connection right connection we want you guys to be a team on this and other areas that's why again like you said this is it is the way to she did that is where you get her but it's not the way the issue it's the it is if it's not you know the way it would be something else his tone he's not coming to you with Grace right I guess we have like a breakdown of communication and they're you where I think we need need help so I don't know where else to turn Well why don't you. Get a 3rd person in the room who could look at him and say Are you joking who would feel loved or supported job or what you just said that was really mean that was demeaning that was critical gone that route we actually had a preacher comment you know for a home visit and did that pretty much I can't believe you did that to her you know if I said that my wife would kick me out you know so in a restaurant that do you respond to me he says you know maybe I am maybe I am a little harsh but well there's no but in the doing it's not like it's a maybe it sounds like you know you are harsh and you have to deal with this and what you may need to do Jamie is kind of take a stand that says look I'm dealing with my weight I'm doing my side I'm working out but Joe you aren't dealing with you're out to rank and I want us to go you know the one home visit by the pastor sounds like it he said you know came to have some good things but Johnny more than that you know any more so I would say let's go talk to somebody on an ongoing basis how come you're maybe got count that pastor have you thought about coming to lose a pro-life. Coming to air. I never heard of it. Well we do this weight loss Institute provide days and I tell you it not only helps you lose the weight but it addresses these kinds of things to where you know you're reconnecting with your husband then that on your website I'll send you some information Ok because it could help but I I hope you're listening to you know every couple that ends in this place has an opportunity to come together solve problems together you know it's just like everything in life it either kind of makes your breaks you you can split up over one person being too heavy or you can use this as an excuse to come together and solve a problem it's so many of the cases they both want the same thing and they both put be benefited by this so it's a matter of being able to connect on that entire communication spectrum all right out of some info on lose it for Life Institute it's August we need your help we need your support all of us support new life please help us if you can if you do we put together 5 different publications The Truth About series narcissism forgiveness grief anger fear will send them all to you along with a ceramic mug for a gift of $50.00 or more for a gift of any amount I'll send you some great teaching by Dave stupid myself from taking your life back if any area of your life isn't your own we can help you with that that's our way of saying thank you and joining Club new life boy does that ever ever help us with the foundation of this ministry most in the take your life back day by day devotional and the New Life cross if you will join the club new life you just call 1800 new life or go to New Life dot com Let's go to number 6 caller number 6 Chris Peoria Illinois w p Oh Hey Chris how you know. Hi it's fine good Can You Hear Me Ok we can i got a cell phone or lack our own because I'm I am a man and wife and mother of 2 children my husband left and basically when he last he said he did nothing wrong and I became too scared Chael and I understood my 2 children I'm trying to raise them you did nothing wrong and you became too spiritual Yeah and he does not want to be the husband that he took vows to be as a Christian has been does not want to be the husband to provide a spiritual their child guide that's why he left Yeah and then that's that's the depth of understanding of this split is you prior to yesterday from I Yankee spiritual but see I I think he got into other things that he knew was wrong like all other people like Affairs Oh yeah Ok so what's your question Chris Well I am still we're still in communicating when I divorced there's no papers miles I this is my husband wanted to divorce but he's not done anything about it he's them financially supporting us pretty much and we came out where cation that and he's also our already called separating preference to his own family his own parents and brothers and sisters and what's your question and we're just trying to be able to talk to him and try to bring him back to God is. That's about what I've been trying to do with them and just don't seem to have the. And then the gumption or I get so nervous to talk to him and told him I'm going to take a break and we'll give you some help right after this on new life life will be back . You're listening to a Classic program from the archives of new life live to order any of the resources mentioned on today's program call 1800 new my boys will be right back. Ransomware is software. That can infiltrate your business through e-mail and neighboring cyber criminals to hijack sensitive information as ransom for your own data's release leveraging Barracuda e-mail security with advanced threats of text and can stop our friend somewhere attack in its tracks as an added measure Barracuda back up allows you to recover your data without having to surrender to extortion crime doesn't pay when you protect your business to do that with Barracuda Barracuda dot com slash ransomware to learn more. Earn your Master of Divinity degree or deployment theology find besting one day we get Gateway seminaries campus in Fremont in ruin our one day Monday program for earn your master's in educational ministry by taking night courses classes start August 28th helpline now at w.w.w. God g.s. That it is you gateway seminary San Francisco campus and very much that's w w w dot g.s. Dot edu gateway seminary biblical mission Oh global. Business Coach Margaret Jackson is keeping the phrase Saturdays at 1 pm here on k f a x tune in for a face and business on the edge of Biblical and foundational approach to doing business as a Christian discover new ways to integrate your Christianity with your finances learn how you can apply your faith in the business world and use the success of your business as a means of glorifying God face and business on the edge with Margaret Jackson on Saturdays at 1 pm on am $1100.00 u.k. F.A.'s be in demand with a master of legal studies degree from faith based charity law school in southern California our fully accredited online master of legal studies degree is for those who don't want to become a lawyer but realize that knowledge of the law is in high demand in m.l.s. Will give you an in-depth understanding of legal documents proceedings and write all taught from the Christian worldview Trinity is known for for more information call 809224748 Again that's 89247482 the law school be in demand. $1100.00 k. After. To find out more information about new life or to order any of the resources mentioned on today's program called 1800 new life now back to the boys. Were back Steven are born here with Dr John towns and Dr Henry Cloud They are the authors of making small groups work and brand new book from Zondervan we're talking to a brand new person Her name is Chris and said that her husband left her she was too spiritual but we're finding out that the husband was having a little outside extra curricular non-marriage affairs kinds of things they're right Chris Yeah are not know yet Ok Now Chris I'm a little fuzzy on what your question is well when sometimes this whole thing's a little fuzzy you know. Amazing how spiritual life gets when a guy is having an affair with a couple of women. Well you know the funny thing was I had to let a lady the Lord and I don't understand all this myself he got into music business and I think he became so called like a big had a love that the pension you know he led to the Lord and then had an affair with her now somebody oh I don't get that with are we on you know they supposedly with a Christian that I'm I have been you know the Bible backwards and forwards and a group of Christian how and I think that a lot so I'll say Ok but what is the question for us how could you know if you walked with you hang up the phone unlike many other people and you were actually helped What what would we be helping you do. I guess what if the president should take. What do you want to what end to I'm basically trying to bring him to the Lord that. I don't know where the Lord can lead us out of this where you know where our art. I can ship going. But you're kind of in limbo on whole right supporting you but he's not moving toward divorce right watching I'm not mad What do you mean he's he's just sort of like Ok I'll stay over here and I'll pay all your bills and have my hairs and don't bother me yeah that's bass yeah that's sort of this man he said that I am not that bad that you know he says I'll take care thanks for you and when I mentioned divorce matter fact the rest of family says well you want this why don't you do it he complains it's not enough money. So money is what matters to him I guess he tried to be Alan my name. Well Chris My hunch is that you've already talked to him a lot about God right. Way and I think it's happening because he started me off he mostly I can't even tell you right tried to tell you about yeah and so so my my question would be if you already know that that's not going to guess I'm going to get anywhere then why would that be your goal you know I'm saying. It doesn't sound like you're going to be the person that turned him back to God Ok right but it does sound like that you might be the person or one of the people that God uses to turn him back to God but mainly by having the kinds of limits to stop enabling this very comfortable zone that he's in and force him to face some realities and oftentimes some people have to face reality then they do turn to God . But it sounds like you're kind of living him live in this company limbo zone so what I do with you I don't well 1st you have to decide what you want Ok you might want to live in limbo the rest your life you know I wouldn't. Know you're willing to take a stand but as you say you know there's teeth to it like say you know Joe I want to work this marriage out in I want you to come to counseling with me and make a commitment to this and tell you about the other women or by a certain date or I'm moving forward with you know dissolution. Or something like that I don't know what your consequence would be or I'm moving forward not talking anymore moving forward with not giving you any of the money that I've taken out all the accounts that she known or or or there's a 1000000 different stances and you. Probably need a good attorney to help you figure out where they are well I had one but I just don't hear any teeth in any areas that would cause him any worry yeah I was one that said not to do anything it wants to paint a bell so I'm so suspect and like him he's a Christian where they knew no one at that so even a divorce Well you know what your husband did something that Jesus specifically said entitles you to a divorce doesn't mean that you have to be divorced but here in title to. So tell your you know you so he either needs to give that divorce do you need to get back in the marriage but you know for some attorney to tell you to sit there for 5 years and remember that's not a good. Ok Ok Chris I would do some soul searching with somebody that knows him and is good with people and find out what it is he still needs because. My hunch is at some level he hasn't left because there's something he neither needs from the institution of marriage with you or from you or from the money thing or whatever find out what he is dependent on and make that they should do is do a search. All right thanks for calling Chris let me see Henry's book changes that heal Ok it's a great book been a big help to me many of you haven't noticed that it actually has been a great help to me and they do you know you before you read it maybe exactly where they didn't they haven't noticed any change because I can just talk in it and I know they all have gotten out of hospital because they carry. 1800 new life if you want to copy of changes that heal our John Henry's new book Making small groups work to great new book and those that support the ministry Well of course there's a mansion in the sky you larger than other people no we don't know that's true but we do send you from fall into forgiven Jennifer O'Neill is the author and that's our way of saying thanks to you for supporting our ministry and we've got another half of this show to go so when we come back we'll do that you can find out all about who we are at the New Life dot com or by calling 1800 new life with that. We appreciate your faithful support of this program to give a tax deductible gift to support or to order any of the products mentioned on today's program called 1800 new life will be right back with new life live after this. 1100 k. . A tax have you racked up more than $10000.00 in credit card debt or you barely getting by making minimum payments you should know the credit card companies are tricking you into thinking there's no way out credit card companies would rather you didn't know that there are ways you can become debt free and you don't have to pay the entire amount you know there are debt relief programs that help people like you escape overwhelming credit card debt national debt relief has helped tens of thousands of people just like you were do some more than $500000000.00 of debt national debt relief has helped so many people there a plus rated by the Better Business Bureau you don't have to declare bankruptcy or take out a consolidation loan you have the right to settle your debt for a mere fraction of what you owe were due support of your debt now call national debt relief at 80518402805184020 that's 805184020 want to be a soldier in the Army of the Lord get your training weeknights at 10 on discipleship boot camp with Bishop Jackson Bishop Jackson is this senior pastor of boys. Are back Stephen are in here with Dr John Townsend and Dr Henry Cloud and reminding everybody about the every man's about a workshop if you're a man you're struggling with sexual integrity and sexual purity in marriage or out of marriage single or married Here's a place to go and if you have a husband or even to your fiancé boyfriend wives in the battle these are all based on the series every man's battle and also of course now in the new Every woman's battle you can get those in Christian bookstores at 1800 new life let's go to Mary Jo She's calling us all the way from Morgantown Pennsylvania w o r d Hey Mary Jo How you doing Hi How are you. Doing Ok that's Ok You sound kind of your ish today how's your day yeah you know that's Hell that's how I am that kind of part and. I have a major depressive disorder. So I'm like that all the time or you know I mean like they are harder to me or is your thing about you know what. My question is. Well my husband left me 6 months ago and what what is your opinion on masturbation as a woman. For for a woman and because I know it's a sin when you're married and you're you're holding that from your husband or your wife you but what about you know since I don't have my husband anymore. You know divorced now not yet but you're going to be where we are getting a divorce correct nobody's. Going to put it back together you want to and he doesn't no no I don't want to put it back together my Of course my church family wants us to put it back together why don't you. While he's with another woman and our love our love ran out a long time ago when we stopped loving each other a long time ago and we were sticking around just email for our kids we have 2 kids and stick around you know we're trying to stick it out but it just didn't work and he fell in love with another woman you know. And I tried to go as far as going out on a couple blind dates and while the hormones took over and you know I practically made up a blind date with a couple people and you practically made her. Own most though is this since she left. Yeah it was just within the last week. And so I've just been I've been really really depressed a lot lately because I know what I did was wrong you know. I didn't have intercourse but there is other other things involved Mary Jo I guess I'd like to ask a couple different questions because there are so many things you're dealing with now that this this thing is I mean we can talk about this and we will but it's sort of the bottom of the list. Like 1st are you doing something about the depression. Yes I am seeing a Christian counsellor and I am taking medication. Is it working I'm switching over to a different medication the medication that I was on I don't think it's working anymore small you on right now I'm on Paxil and what he's switching to Effexor x r I think. What are you learning in your counseling about why you're no more we're just learning. Just different I realize I'm really not learning too much I mean we're talking a lot. I just talk a lot and just know that God God is there for me God You know I do know that God's there for me. I I don't feel that I'm learning that much because I just started going. And I know that the lost soul desires. Go away after a while and you know. I don't know that. We're all struggling think with the same thing here in that that what we're hearing is a. Sort of like the tree has some problems and you're focusing on this one little fruit. And we're worried about the degree to which you feel like you're plugged into a stream of life a healthy path a wellness pattern direction where light is flowing into your soul in your moving and things are getting good in full and rich in time and it sounds more like you're sort of like you said you know yeah I'm kind of the or and that's who I am now I've got this problem masturbation is if I don't have it I know I don't I don't do that I don't like to know Ok a problem about the concept the question of show progress Yeah and what we're saying is you know there's a lot in what you said that is much. Much more. You know greater concern than your question it's like. For example. It sounds like when you approach on this it's kind of like you feel a little bit like life happens to you. But when people say passive kind of built in when people say the love ran out that's a really a red flag Mary Jo you know me. Like you didn't feel somewhere you got empowered along the way by God and other people get information in this then the other to learn that love is not something that runs out there's not like a. An amount of love in a relationship that runs out what happens is people fail to love and so what that see that something you can do something about and we would want you beginning to look at your whole relational life in a way that you get empowered to create so much love in your life that that you're not you're not depressed anymore in your not overtaken by lustful desires and all that stuff so we want you to get into the process and really throw yourself into it and ask yourself the question with your counsellor and your pastor in a small group of people that is why do I take kind of Us a passive approach to life and think that I don't have a lot of choices and power get those answered began begin to take more initiative in those things as you jump into where life really is which is of God relationships and growth and then see what happens to the question about lustful desires Now let me talk about the masturbation think just for so I'll start and then John Hillery wrap wrap it up but Mary Jo there is this belief that if you as this newly new single person that if you masturbate. It's going to release. Your lust and passion and desires. And I believe for most people rather than it being a release it actually can over time stirs them up more. You know it's an instant release but then you're looking forward to the next time and then you're kind of collecting Bana season images in and it can a few rules the very thing that you're worried about getting into. And you know I'm going to situation which of explain more fully to everybody in a month or so but you know I have not been in a sexual relationship for over a year and I am proof that you don't have to masturbate to be a man to live to survive. A healthy that kind of thing so. I just want to encourage you that you don't have to do this that you it isn't something that is really necessarily going to help you and I also say that just as we've said in the every man and every woman series that so much and because the Bible doesn't specifically say do not masturbate I'm not going to say in every single situation but so much of masturbation does destroy intimacy between married people and many times I think it is immoral in that it does stir up lust and youthful passions and other things that the scripture tells us to not stir within us that that's my opinion based on personal experience and the experience of many many people and talking to a lot of folks who feel so great about themselves and now that they're free from the real negative part of masturbation when it becomes a compulsive behavior that kind of has you and is in control of you so that is my angle but I want to hear John and Henry weigh in on this too because they go to great approaches to. Mary Jo I would just add the other side of it that when the Bible talks about. You know the kind of thing that Steve was describing There's a phrase in a phrase in a fusion so it's hard to say praise in the fusions that says that did we get caught up in whatever the behavior is that continually asked for more and so you know it could be it could be masturbation it could be real sex it could be the kind of thing that you got you know you got close to doing and on these days it could be shopping it could be anything but there's a continual lust for more and what it says is the answer to that isn't just you know some rule what it's talking about there in the passage is that it comes from being separated from life that that's where the last comes from is the disconnection from relationship in love and using your talents and being involved out there in life and being fulfilled and spiritually alive and in pursuing your dreams and goals and can see in a in a full soul like Dad there's not a lot of room for hunger and darkness and that's why we focused on what we try to focus on because the separation of life leads to the last and let me send you every woman's battle I think it will help in this situation you're listening to a Classic program from the archives of new life live to order any of the resources mentioned on today's program call 1800 you like the boys will be right back. 1100 k. F. K. X Are you suffering with hearing loss are you sick of people constantly complaining that your t.v. Is too loud are you tired of asking people to speak up would you like to hear more clearly but you don't want to wear a hearing aid that makes you look old then you need to try Listen clear a life changing breakthrough designed by top audio engineers to fit your ear almost invisibly listen clear is fully adjustable so you can find the perfect way to hear almost everything wherever you are and whatever you're doing and right now you can try Listen clear absolutely free with free shipping even give you free batteries for life so call now 185-556-8432 extension 7 listen clear is lightweight and completely hassle free and it's practically invisible call for your risk free home try with free shipping and free batteries for life for free information coma 105-556-8432 extension 7 that's 185556843278555684327. Is a turn to reexamine your educational opportunities dig deep into. Cities Bible College therefore double courses in Bible theology and ministry. Guided equip you to serve him in ministry now located in Berkeley at the corner of. A city's Bible College offers evening and weekend classes so you can pursue your degree on your time learn more there Student Information night Monday August 28th details the basics. That space cities title dot org. This is still Adams your benevolent car czar host of. Where you get answers to your car question each week our local automotive experts are here to give you sound advice to maximize your transportation dollars have a question during the week reach me at my shop. 518869299 learn more about our show at north. Saturday mornings. 8 here on am 1100 k. They say. 1100 k. After next. Welcome back to this classic program from the archives of new lifeline to make a tax deductible gift or the order any of the products mentioned on today's program called 1800 new life now back to the boys were actually even harder when you're with Dr John Townsend Dr Henry clowned and you and your phone calls and let's go back to the phone let's talk with. Leslie. From Detroit Michigan w f l Hey Leslie how you doing good how are you good well my question is I'm recently divorced about a year in September where where do I draw the boundaries with my ex-husband when in my heart I think he wants. Our lives back together but yet when he comes in when he comes over and I'd open my heart to that I'm always disappointed What is it what for what reason does he come over we have 3 children. We just he just recently moved out the house. He comes over to visit the kids he comes over to we're recently put thousands for sale so he's doing the ads and you know I've been and you've been on the horse for a year but he didn't move out of the house correct so that was even worse you live in the house together as divorced people correct why was that financial reasons he could not move we cannot afford an extra original $7.00 a month for him to. Live a mother you know place who won the point part was that my kids obviously see this and they're teenagers now so it's a little bit easier I think and I've been trying to talk to them but you know it's it's very difficult My question is how my now when he comes over I totally ignore him I I feel like I'm very rude but that's not my personality I have a reality would be just hey what's going on and I was a day and I know that's not how it should be so I had my questions how well you know which is it how you should be doing up corporal is how you should be or not be well I feel like that's not Godly the way I act to him. But when I do act like mind like normal friendly friendly he takes it the wrong way and oh good less you know what are you doing but let's go to the store let's go you know it's like more or yeah I know Ok then stop that him correct so then you could say which I do I say Billy I can go you know I remember I got things to do. I it's easier for me to know not what I was going to. Say was you know what that's really not like our relationship is anymore I don't run to the store with you we kind of you know solve problems in this in the other but sometimes we start doing stuff like that and it kind of blurs the line and confuses is that we're really divorced now right now and that's in and wait no that's the attitude now I'm taking but I don't I mean in a way and see I thought to myself Well Ok I'll take the elder and which I was doing going to start thinking well if you see that you know we're we're happy we I mean we've gone to lunch to kind of gotten over that delusion so exactly what doesn't work so what's the question the question is is that God to be that I act differently towards him than I do everybody else it's almost like it's a hatred and I know it's a I mean here's what I think you need to look at is is does his seeing the kids have to be under your roof or you've got this artificial. Setting and he's wanting to act like married people you're not I mean that's got to be weird I think he should come pick the kids up and take them right. Start yelling like well then you have to talk with him about you know what this isn't working for us it's not fair to the kids for them to see this and I think to do that when you've got to get over the confusion in your own mind because I'm sorry Leslie. That you gave to us early on in the car he said I really think in my heart of hearts that he wants to move towards you know being together but then when I open myself up to that I'm disappointed so I see you. You've got 2 things going on if you're disappointed every time then you need to change what your heart of hearts is thinking and what it's expecting and how you're acting Well the worst part was that it was how he projects that he whether I tell him it's not hey he's not on this call We're not consulting him we're not talking about the man that's out of control we're talking about you and your life this isn't about you changing his mind and I guess that's where right sounds like and we want you to get in your goal of your mind and your life and you know what the fruit in the side benefit that Alpha Leslie is he goes this this warmth and I like it but you don't worry about that part I know you worry about a same environment that works for your kids right that's right. All right I hope draw what you can control I hope it's helpful to you and let me send a book to you that will be a great encouragement God will make a way I think it will encourage you through the tough times to wonderful book by John and Henry also as a resource you know we have their new book Making small groups work what every small group leader needs to know but also what every small group participant needs to know is a part of that book and that's available at 1800 new life and I don't know if you've gone to our website at New Life dot com But you know you can go to the little book buying sex. When you can type in a subject and there are the resources that we have for you we have wonderful intensives every man's battle that's the 8 to September take your life back that's the 8th in d.c. Intimacy in marriage September 22nd and restored November the 10th in d.c. Those are all there but maybe it's not an intensive that you need maybe it's a couch or maybe it's a book a cd we've got resources but you have to call us at 1800 new life the other thing is the transformation occurs because people support us in ways that maybe they never thought we needed or that they wanted to but they finally realized wait a 2nd this ministry is transforming lives and when you've transform a life when you help us transform a life it transforms a family everything is different a gift of $50.00 or more awesome you 5 publications they focus on narcissism priggishness grief anger and fear those are 5 big ones and will also send you the ceramic travel mug but my mother's 3 sayings that I heard when I grew up that's our way of saying thank you for that if it's not 50 dollars a gift of any amount all sinew are thank you cd it's teachings from take your life back that Dave and I did they stupid I did from the book and when you join Club new life to say thank you there will send you this amazing new life Cross along with to take your life back devotional 365 day devotional really a great I think it's the best devotional I've ever been a part of it's our way of saying thank you that's for those who can help you can support us you can sponsor somebody you can scholarships somebody you can truly be the the source of hope for transformation for so I can afford it but you have to call us 1800 new life or go to the website at New Life dot com And as we wrap up our program today John close out with some. Wisdom Steve when people call on times they want to know what the spiritual way is to answer questions or to resolve conflicts and one of the big things is in some 97 I said let those who love the Lord hate evil Well if you love the Lord you want to benefits you want the good things he's got right but one of the things you've got to start hating the evil you see in yourself and other people the deception irresponsibility selfishness you gotta love one thing which is the one who's the best and then you've got to have a stopwatch or you know get him convicted over here. A conviction this is kind of a number hating evil conviction. Well good because interventions working Henry thanks so much Yeah but begin to say I'm going to not like my god doesn't like and see what happened to your life. So I'm just wondering if you're out there listening heavy really made a stand to not like what God doesn't like Poil tell you a little bit of commitment renewed commitment goes a long way in your relationship with God You know one of the things that I've mentioned here about Henry's book changes that heal is that it really is all about connection connection to God to your family and to other people and if you're struggling in that area call us at 1800 new life and let us find a counselor who can help you work on the depths of connection be said to go through life and never truly feel connected to a real live other human being on this earth 100 new life or go to the website at New Life dot com You know we really love being with you and we hate it when we're away glad we're all back and we'll see you here again tomorrow and the like but. Thanks for listening to this classic program from the archives of do life live we hope this program has helped you by giving you insights for handling challenges you face and why we want you to know that we're here for you but we also need to know that new life lives on listener support in the street. That means we depend on your gifts to stay on the air which is why your financial help assume Porton to make your donation or to get any of the resources mentioned on today's program called 1800 new life it's 18695433 Write to us if you like ministries feel box 1029 Lake Forest California 96 or anon Please join us again next time for new life live. In order for a new sponsored by New Life Ministry on am 1100. Are you looking for a preschool daycare or a before and after care center in the Britain area look no further than the award winning baby Yale Academy centrally located on the entryway just east of Highway 4 baby you'll Academy provides an opportunity for children to excel and develop in a place where they feel safe and happy. For strong academics flexible schedules and unparalleled care and service come see for yourself to arrange for a tour of the campus call 925-308-7613 mention k f 8 x. And your registration and curriculum fees will be waived a savings of $245.00 every child deserves to have fun and enjoy their 1st steps to a higher education called Baby yell Academy in Brentwood today 925-308-7693 that's 925-308-7693 work like they be Yale Academy dot org not affiliated with Yale University Hi there Happy Friday I'm Jordan Don't let the deadline get by you just a few more days left to request your free book from gospel for Asia and Road to Reality broadcast book is called no longer as Slumdog true stories of children raised up out of the slums of Asia into a life of hope the rescues are nothing more and more so read for yourself get your free book today no longer as Slumdog at com click on the free book banner I'm Jordan Pastor Brian there it is here with inspired to live Amy Levin 100 cafe x. . Your prison clothes the river Michael's for from the studio that brought you war room and miracles from heaven comes all saints Castres 1st decide to close a struggling church because for 3 months just to see this little church I knew the land in the Far from a scene the face grows Whoa. I was talking to someone they all say. They did Fiji and I'm going to just yell play for tickets and showtimes go to All Saints movie. Time spend with your grandchildren is precious as the saying goes you get all of the joy of the responsibility maybe it's time to give something back imagine the difference a Christian education would make in their lives you could start them down that path for a lot less than you might think. X. Has partnered with Christian schools all around the bay to offer full tuition vouchers at half price find all the details of this like changing program at k f a s dot com. Futures and options trading involves substantial risk and is not suitable for all investors fire the stock broker and hire yourself I'm Larry Levin and I've been on the trading floor for 23 years I was one of the biggest traders in the s. And p. Pit I'm also the president of trading advantage the leading educational firm teaching people how to become professional daytraders now for a limited time I'm offering one of the training techniques I use to make 1900000 dollars for free get started right now by calling 88876 Leave your email address on my voicemail and I'll email you my free trading technique and daily insider's market report at no cost to you this is the very information I used to build my fortune I was going to ready to retire I still knew to get your income but I didn't want to work for anyone else because of Laurie is excellent instructors I can trace excessively for myself and I never have to work for someone else again fire the stockbroker and hire the most dependable person you know you again call the next 90 minutes leave your email address on my voicemail 8489887688876880 . 76 Hello my brothers and sisters in the cave fax family this is Pastor and attorney mostly Collins at 807777777 that's 800 all sevens you know years ago when I was attending Bible College by faith lead me to go to law school and start my personal injury law practice I know that sounds backwards but that's the way it was so now as a lawyer for the last 35 years I've been winning cases for badly injured people if you've been badly injured by a reckless driver of a careless doctor and want to win your case call me and my legal staff today at 807777777 that's 800 all sevens with law offices in San Francisco San Jose and Oakland would love to help you good luck to win your case and there's never a fee until we went to have you been injured and want to win your case call me today Attorney mostly Collins just remember 800 all sevens for legal help. Be in demand with a master of legal studies degree from faith based charity law school in southern California our fully accredited online master of legal studies degree is for those who don't want to become a lawyer but realize that knowledge of the law is in high demand and m.l.s. Will give you an in-depth understanding of legal documents or see.

Related Keywords

Radio Program ,Debt ,Types Of University Or College ,Business Law ,Development ,Payment Systems ,Femail ,Legal Documents ,Family Law ,Credit Cards ,Incorporated Cities And Towns In California ,Bible Colleges ,Marriage ,Christian Writers ,National Association Of Independent Colleges And Universities Members ,Legal Professions ,Council Of European National Top Level Domain Registries Members ,Social Groups ,Generic Top Level Domains ,Family ,Emotion ,Psychology ,Religious Terminology ,Religious Belief And Doctrine ,Gender ,Demography ,Social Institutions ,Radio Kfax 1100 Am ,Stream Only ,Radio ,Radioprograms ,