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Anyway, sour grapes is to be expected. Why would you praise your opponent after he wiped the mat with you and thats the problem with these politics even when theres good news country its been used for the party and theres a lot of good news on jobs, ices, economy all good but we could do better. The Democrats Remains our. Schumer looks like hes the penguin from batman. [laughter] trying to pass a softball sized gallstone. [laughter] and pelosi looks like that gallstones is about to hit her in the mercedes. [laughter] the rest of the democrats all look like they shared the same hemorrhoids. What is the problem . First, that speech wasnt for them. It was for you. I thought it was too long but for you its not long enough. Its 90 minutes of positivity about this great country after eight years of moaning about america his speech was a water cooler in the desert. For democrats your good news is there bad news but also their bad news is your good news. In the future, heres a handy measurement for success. I call it the pelosi scowl ohmmeter. The more she frowns the more you should smile. [laughter] it this leads me to the memo. Week was fraught with anticipation as if the royal family giving birth to a panda. The nation wanted answers and their first cannot be quenched until they heard this command. Believes the memo. [laughter] greg good work they are dubbing. Finally it was released and became the super bowl for nerds. If its true, the dossier was put together by crystal still by the funding of fusion gps and the democrats. Then they played up to Media Outlets and the Justice Department asked for surveillance werent but according to the memo the application did disclose the role of the dnc or Clinton Campaign in funding the dossier. The memo also plays a former fbi Deputy Director Andrew Mccabe wouldnt have stopped werent without this dossier. Maybe its me but this has clinton stink all over it. All roads lead back to the perv and the pantsuit. [laughter] sound like a good tv series. I wonder if trump thanks it is disgraceful. I think its terrible if you want to know the truth. I think its a disgrace was going on in this country. I think its a disgrace. The memo was sent to congress and declassified in congress will do whatever theyre going to do but i think its a disgrace. Greg i think its a disgrace. [laughter] but he is right. The dems want to nail trump so badly they were willing to use an unfettered hypo partisan dossier to do it. They use this dossier to get a warrant thats like me using Monopoly Money to buy a horse. We spent the last year here in occlusion between trump and russia and all along the real collusion was committed by the perpetrators of that narrative. The media, democrats and their government allies. This will mess is brought to you by the same people that is not cool, right, adorable puppies going on his life . Good puppies. Good job. Can you do it . Gay. Come on puppies. Puppy, puppy. Greg i told you there would be puppies. [cheering and applause] let us look at tonights guest, he had no qualms defusing bombs is former us marine Bomb Technician Staff Sergeant joey joe. [cheering and applause] and another hero his jokes are drier than powdered milk. Writer and comedian david angelo. [cheering and applause] and the real hero, if you cant handle her smirk then youre probably a jerk, National Review reporter kat sims. [cheering and applause] finally, the Jolly Green Giant sent and help mail former bodyguard, nasa psychotic tyrus. [cheering and applause] all right, joey, you got the State Of The Union and take your pick and run with it. Its the State Of The Union that was forever ago. I sent her to State Of The Union ive batting 900 mine so i had one bad day. Greg one bad day, joey. Ive got a leg up on your two. Greg terrible. David, what about the memo . The memo was good but we all kind of wanted more out of the memo. I feel like it didnt give enough secrets. I feel like they should just open this mcafee of the tsa project they should just let you in the fault for an hour. Heres the thing. The memo i already knew. Lets show the. Can we show that . This is from march 2017. Greg this is you. I cant read it. Its too far away. Greg [cheering and applause] the most trusted names in this. Greg you are like a psychic with really interesting glasses. Speaking of interesting glasses, cat, what would you like to talk about. Would you like to talk about the amazing the speech that trump gave or the groundbreaking earth shattering memo . Oh my god. Talk about the memo but im really glad that im a wizardly that i want to see all the things the fbi does not want me to see, one 100 . I think we need to take a look at how this is able to happen in the first place and look at reforming this entire area of government when we take the Fourth Amendment seriously so its not so easy to surveilled american citizens. Greg i will agree with you. [cheering and applause] thats the thing that bothers me. Anyone can create a questionable dossier about my life and i might not be questionable, might not be questionable, those two years anyway, tyrus, thoughts on the memo . Thoughts on your dossier, yes. There is no unicorn, kids. [laughter] greg it was a donkey just as a unicorn. [laughter] greg so, you know what, heres my frustration this week. I thought the State Of The Union was very good. I thought its always good to hear positive things about our country because we dont hear enough about it. [applause] i was looking for one thing and i thought maybe it would be in structure that was going to bring the sides together or start some dialogue because after the State Of The Union was over those of us who love trump still of trump and those of us hate him and blame him for everything in the entire world thats going wrong they still hate him. To tighten the memo was the same thing. If you dont like the Russian Investigation and if you have issues with the left, you will support the memo. If you love trump, thats what we needed but my issue that is page, thats the guy . Every group has one and we have him. And that dude and then when he tweet and then no, this does mean and the only thing i dont want to hear more from pages crews. Those of the two guys i dont want to hear from and i keep waiting for something that is going to start bringing us together and i feel like the Division Lines keep trying in the sand and theres no middle ground. My book i kept thinking im working on a book thats like living in the great divide. Its belmonts, no, its about walking to my neighborhood because i walk through liberal ill get to that and if i walk by conservative i get cheered. Its crazy how divided we are. Greg thats why you walk on the conservative side. You know what could unite us all . Besides alcohol, russians. They played on americas key attribute which is not a key attribute but a consequence the politics of binary system. They play both sides. They played the democrats and took money from the democrats replaced the republicans to create disruption. It works. I thank you just nailed it. Our arrogance is that we had to be in on it and thats the ironic. We were in on it. Greg yeah, all right, were so much more to talk about privately as well. All right, whats up with trumps border wall . An what i did there . [cheering and applause] out with the grain, in with the farmraised chicken. Healthful. Flavorful. Beneful. Theres a serious virus out there that 1 in 30 boomers has, yet most dont even know it. A virus thats been almost forgotten. Its hepatitis c. Hep c can hide in the body for years without symptoms. Left untreated it can lead to liver damage, even liver cancer. The only way to know if you have hep c is to ask your Healthcare Provider for the simple blood test. If you have hep c, it can be cured. For us, its time to get tested. Its the only way to know for sure. Greg that is teaching them a terrible us. Critics have called Trump Small Proposal Everything from irresponsible to stupid but there is logic behind all the new wall will be used. Based on topography and budget each Quarter Sector will extend an existing fence, replace an old fence or add a secondary wall allowing agents to apprehend immigrants in an enforcement zone. Greg its a trick wall. If the secondary wall. But theres a fence on the border already yet liberals always forget that part they act like trumps the first person to come up with this amazing idea. Basically, trumps wall is a new and improved version of something that is already there and yet it doesnt have bipartisan support. Maybe trump does has to sell it better. Are you ready for the most radical International Border feature since Niagara Falls . You will love border wall 2000. Its the ultimate Multipurpose Wall everyone can enjoy. Need a site for the x games . It converts to a half bite. Wish you could see bob ross landscape on display . And the best part of border wall 2000 is its been certified unbreakable by the koolaid man. More like vote no, the 21st hundred visitors will ride on the first space escalator to the moon. Greg that is what we need. David, thoughts on the wall . Oh boy. How long will it take and arent we on the cusp of flying cars . Not that i want to be like but its 2018. Thats the one concern i have. Greg it wont be a flying car but a drone that can carry a human that will pick you up annual flyover. [laughter] at least the little children is easier to drown, ive heard, i have not tried that, kat. Kat, thoughts . Are you excited . An impenetrable wall to you would like that around you. I live that with around me emotionally. [laughter] i think that a better way to go about it to end the Welfare Incentive and end the drug war to keep the gangs from coming over here. That way we wouldnt need to spend tens of billions of dollars on a wall and i know thats not a popular opinion but its not a joke but thats what i really think it sometimes that is how life goes. Greg will you cry . Not right now, ill wait until after the show. She is a crying corner in the back. Greg tyrus, i look at this deal and the democrats are ignoring the fact that they one on this. Theyre getting at one point to million or even more people that will be through the path of citizenship. He was called the amnesty don and he took a lot of shots for trying to make a deal but they dont want to deal with him. It doesnt matter if everyone got a past they wouldve found something wrong with it. It wasnt a joke because i agree with everything one 100 that you said but the idea of being there to see someone oh my god. But the one was shorter so the hop over and you made it in like thats thats pretty funny. I hadnt seen that type of artwork since the classes in high school. Merge this way or the red highway will. Greg i learned so much. Joey, what you think . Listen, i think trumps all the small and he was elected from this wall so we wont build a wall that we can reconcile that with his boating popular. The American People elected him and his will was his biggest talking point. With that said theyre happy about having money in their pocket right now so ever is going to go a different direction now is the time and do it by the time democrats have potential to be almost incapable to work with so it will be something other than what hes promised now is the time to do it with a deal. As far as the whole issue in general, i grew up in a town 75 hispanic i see both sides of the issue from a personal standpoint. If youre going to do anything have the pics the Immigration System but we have to have some Security Measure like had said. At the incentive that is not there. We have to stop people wanting to come here and the idea that its a free ride when you get here. Greg i think hollywood is that. Oh sure. Greg i do think no matter what trouble build this wall and even if you dont use it its going to be somewhere in new jersey. Its like you know what it is . This is his obamacare. Think about that. Once obamacare came into being the other side wanted to dismantle it so once he puts this wall of you will have an entire party that will in their slogan will be tear down this wall and then it will be a very good slogan but the problem is it could be that the wall works and then they will not want to tear down the wall or to be twotier hard to tear down. I think kat hit on a big thing. Sometimes walls can be built and theyre not physical. Making it hard harder to get eligible for welfare and food stamps and it takes away from american citizens in need. I had a discussion with some people this weekend one of the ladies of the hardest thing is she a two Young Children and when she went to go get services that she needed they were very rude to the englishspeaking ones and they were like its not for you and you have to wait but when the people and immigrants came and they had all their stuff for them and they had a translator for them and all these other things for them. She was almost being steered out like we dont do that here. Its this double standard and if you come here illegal you shouldnt get any those to be reserved for our citizens. Greg no countries. We have to move on. [cheering and applause] everybody, everyone deserves a chance at coming up, California Michael Teacher thanks a military is the lowest of the low. Ive a feeling we will disagree with him. Lets begin. Yes or no . 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He says the onduty call that came in on january 13 did not sound like a drill. Im alicia, now back to the greg gutfeld show. Greg should he recant his stupid rant . I speak of California High School teacher and city councilman greg. [crowd boos] i was just going to call him [bleep]. Why not . Its easy. As you know, this jerk was caught on tape bashing the military and vanished into a tirade because two kids in the history class were wearing marine corps such as. Roll it, gladys. [inaudible] greg the sky. [crowd boos] and i already called him a [bleep]. I cant do it again. Anyway, someone called for his inspiring but the best response may have been from retired fourstar general and chief of staff, john kelly. What is your reaction to that knowing that hes teaching 17 euros this . I think the guy ought to go to hell. [cheering and applause] greg hes been placed on administrative leave and they say he will be have disciplinary measures taken. I have an idea for his punishment. They can watch this on loop for eternity. [laughter] greg i dont thank you deserve that. Joey, i go to you first for no particular reason. [laughter] im not sure about this guy. Of all the things he said the worst thing was when he said they dont make [inaudible] decisions. We dont always make the best decisions at 2 00 oclock in florida in florida and now i have a nine yearold son so you know what im saying. Really, this made me so mad. The premise that hes working on here is that the military is undereducated and hes talking to High School Students and you only go there if you dont do well here. That premise is completely false. Not only is he stupid but hes spreading lies. Id love to meet the marines that took his girlfriend because this is coming from somewhere personal. [cheering and applause] heres the deal. Almost 90 of the military have a High School Education as opposed to less than 60 of civilians. Almost over 80 of officers have a four year degree or higher and then 30 of the philippines. Thats fact and data. Then, i dont know. Oh you know, say it. This guy has been a mayor, city councilman and a teacher. Im qualified to do all of those things. He could not be a United States marine is the only thing he wanted in life and thats where i started my career. To go after the education or our motivation, people believe in something bigger themselves. They want to contribute to something that might take their life or their legs, oh my god, theyre the lowest of the low but listen, dude, i challenge him to a physical contest with the one limb i still have intact. [cheering and applause] greg tyrus mark i think he felt he could say this because he doesnt know anybody so cocooned in his own world. For small, i have to disagree. He didnt have a. You said. Thats a whole different anger. Another thing is on his moral high ground, does it get cold up there . I think this is the problem and im going on a limb here but im assuming hes a democrat in the liberal. [laughter] im just guessing. For the people but he loves to [bleep] the people so he is literally the reason why they cant win in office. Is this type of mindset. He thanks youre doing him a favor and he makes as a teacher makes anywhere from 30and judging by the way history and responded to speech, probably on the lower end. He probably has to get a parttime job in the summertime to supplement his income. I graduated as a teacher and i said im in a try something else. Its not to talk with the military and one of the reasons they go to the military is to further their education. His entire rant was his moral high ground and his horse because he didnt have the [bleep] to go pick up a gun independent country. [applause] greg what about you, david . I think he should get his job back on one condition that he spends a year embedded somewhere. Imagine he would get learning experience. They should have one battalion that just festers an and [inaudible conversations] this guy, look, i didnt during the military because i know im too much of a loser. . Greg i would not last. Id be home on the bus in the second day. What about you, kat . I love that hes saying people in the military are dumb when hes making these kind of comments in a room full of recording devices and i mean this guy would be drunk to stand up there and say your uncle louie is stupid. Theyre getting paid to be a teacher and i have seen a better thought out lesson plan by jack black in School Of Rock as a substitute teacher. Greg i have to wrap it up. The bigger lesson is schools fail to accept life experiencing with their hiring teachers. This guy obviously nobody knows nobody in the military and says he is no Life Experience because everyone here for someone in the military so his self involved [bleep] will kill education. A typical veteran would give more knowledge to kids that i know nothing, jerk like that. I would also include not just school but in networks as well. Places like fox news and places like cnn need to hire people like joey because they have more knowledge. [cheering and applause] and avoid people like david angela. Of next, conservatives are better looking than liberals. Who are the Science Deniers now . [cheering and applause] [vacuuming sound] and when you switch to esurance, you can save time, worry, hassle and yup, money. In fact, drivers who switched from geico to esurance saved hundreds. So you might want to think about pulling the ol switcheroo. Thats auto and Home Insurance for the modern world. Esurance. An allstate company. Click or call. My doctor recommended i switch to miralax. On, Stimulant Laxatives make your body go by forcefully stimulating the nerves in your colon. Miralax is different. It works with the water in your body to hydrate and soften. 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We asked the worlds most handsome man to comment. [laughter] greg sexy. Tyrus . You buy this . Know and thats not the reason why goodlooking people dont help because they deal with the haters. When they get successful why would they get back, screw them. Haters are going to hate. This is the second week in a row weve had these scientific things on who is goodlooking and who can be a kid longer and who is doing this . Were not paying for this from our tax dollars are we . I hate it. It drives me nuts that you generalize people. If someone is goodlooking, usually at the people who are very attractive get picked on the most because they always youll see a beautiful girl and shell talk about in high school how they pulled her hair and everyone is mean because she was pretty. Greg they are lying. I was bullied, no, everyone was bullied. They were probably the bullies. Mean girls, didnt you see the movie . Kat, due by this . Im not sure im qualified to comment on this study because i dont think i know how to tell if someone is hot or not. Ill be out with my friends and ill be like that guy is and theyll say yeah, kat, hes asking for change. He doesnt have a home. [laughter] and im like i can change him. Come over. Greg you will change them because hes defecating on the sidewalk. Joey . In this day and age attractiveness is how hard you work for it. Are you doing crossfit or what are you doing and it makes sense to me in the sense that if your personality is to wait on the government or got to bestow gifts upon you you may be liberal and ugly but if you work for it, we are conservatives and we get worked on. [cheering and applause] no offense and i didnt mean to figure you in that one getting work done. Greg david, you are slightly sweaty. Thank you, greg, i appreciate it. [laughter] you know, i dont think liberals are necessarily uglier but its the expressions. Youll never, Are You Serious . Conservatives dont do that. You cannot be [laughter] its like a liberal expression. Greg that the liberal expression. Ive seen it at starbucks so many times. Greg i do think part of this is true in the other part is false. It is true that goodlooking people benefit from society more often than the plane because theyre afforded more opportunities because human beings gravitate toward goodlooking people. Goodlooking people dont have to try so hard. Good looks is a commodity. This is why whenever you see public nudity of a really good looking person its weird because youre thinking why are you giving that away and thats only usually new to scams are not attractive. No one is asking for it so i said this before theres no Activist Group the plane or ugly. Theres no Martin Luther king for the plane, no gondi for the ugly but it is inequality. Conservative people do get something. They do understand it but they see the suffering as a individual challenge not as something the government should be trying to fix or government it should not be totally governmental. All right. Ill take that. [applause] i love this next story. Coming up, Killer Whales that can talk. Finally something that makes them interesting. [cheering and applause] aha. And an awardwinning mobile app. That is more. Oh, theres more. Mobile id cards, emergency roadside service. More technology. I can even add a new driver. Right from her phone geico. Expect great savings and a whole lot more. Your heart doesnt only belong to you. Bye grandpa. And if you have Heart Failure, entrusting your heart to entresto may help. Entresto is a Heart Failure medicine that helps improve your hearts ability to pump blood to the body. In the largest Heart Failure study ever, entresto was proven superior at helping people stay alive and out of the hospital compared to a leading Heart Failure medicine. Dont take entresto if pregnant. It can cause harm or death to an unborn baby. Dont take entresto with an ace inhibitor or aliskiren. If youve had angioedema while taking an ace or arb medicine, dont take entresto. The most serious side effects are angioedema, low blood pressure, kidney problems, or high blood potassium. Ask your doctor about entresto. And help make more tomorrows possible. Lets try another one. Lets all listen very carefully. Heres the researcher getting the whales to say one, 21, two. One, two. One, two. Greg i think the whale went to number two. This is a little more confident and its a proper name and now listen carefully. Heres the trainer and the whale saying amy. Amy. Amy. Amy. Greg that was creepy. How is that amy . All in all i am not impressed that talking whale. Especially since my will, lawrence, can recite shakespea shakespeare. Greg, ive played your game. Give me a fish. [laughter] greg stupid whale. Kat, i think whales are depressing animal because you are a mammal but you dont have any limbs and youre also a fish but you need to be there so youre not in both worlds and its kind of sad. It seems all right. Greg yeah, all right. I think that assaying these wheels can talk is a big stret stretch. They can say i and they can blow raspberries and they can say by. They swim up and go and then they swim away. I want a conversation like that i call up my exboyfriend. Greg david, are we giving whales more human credit than they deserve . They cant even open a jar of pickles. I bet one could. Greg with what . I dont, im suspicious of these things. I dont like the trend of them learning language. We dont need more opinions in the world. You know what i mean . They will have a yelp account and its like i came to the grill and im so excited and disappointed. Greg im giving the Pacific Ocean three stars. [laughter] yeah, and arent [inaudible] better than that but. Greg parents. Parents. Theyre too repetitious. And theyre always staring at you when you do stuff and when you kill people. [laughter] greg carrots are a great witness to crimes, joey. Joey, if they were really smart why did they invent anything . They have these big brains but theres no will bike, you know, theres a whale industrial revolution. Maybe its a dolphin but they called a whale that is a giant sonar on its head and they have one in atlanta at the aquarium thats impressive. This whole story ticks me off. I have a friend she and i cant tell what teach my veggie what part of the grass you should be upon and now a whale can talk and my dog cant figure out where to put. It gets me that i dont how to teach my dog what to do. Greg maybe you should get a whale. [laughter] all right, tyrus, i have a feeling you love the story. After hearing you, i hate you for being a part of the story. You dont know nothing about whales. Once again, this goes to the arrogance of science. Killer whales speak three languages. They have their own language. They also have the ability to feel each others feelings. They are so far ahead of us in terms of medication the fact that you would try to take something that basically does not have our windpipe cannot speak the way and can mimic our sound shows how smart they are and how stupid we are. They dont make bikes, greg, because they dont have to. They map the ocean with their brain. Their only problem is they have meddling people in smart asses like you who make fun of their greatness. This was a great story and you should be ashamed of yourself. [applause] blue planet to just came out. I love that series and im enjoying it. They have this great scene where the dolphins were running and theres this giant False Killer Whale and greg you dont know what this is so dont laugh but were chasing them in the dolphins turn around and they talk it out. They literally stopped getting more and talked it out and fished together. Greg imparting Human Behavior on the slippery creatures is they talk to each other. They have babies and stuff. Greg they are in the ocean for a reason. They didnt evolve. Yeah, they evolve there. Greg no, they didnt. [laughter] you just like them because you are big and they are big. Thats it. Thats it. And you like unicorns because their tall and slender. [laughter] greg dont go anywhere. Dont laugh at that. All right. More after this, i believe. [cheering and applause] th a sor. But hes got work to do. So he took aleve this morning. If hed taken tylenol, hed be stopping for more pills right now. Only aleve has the strength to stop tough pain for up to 12 hours with just one pill. Tylenol cant do that. Aleve. All day strong. All day long. And for pain relief and a good nights rest, try aleve pm for a better am. Of dry eye. Of us suffer from the gritty and frustrating symptoms we need theratears®. Theratears® is more than just eye drops. Its eye therapy. Dry eye symptoms are caused by a salt imbalance. Theratears® unique electrolyte formula, quickly restores the natural balance. So your eyes will thank you. More than eye drops, dry eye therapy. Theratears®. Greg last word for everyone. You can talk about the super bowl if you have predictions or plug something for joey, go. I work for a place called campus of the ground, Celebrity Background started and we bring in kids in the Autism Spectrum and put them with kids who arent in the Autism Spectrum and allow them to go to camp together and learn how amazing each one is. These kids have challenges can contribute to society and be amazing people. Go home and hear about this and talk to your kids and tell them about how amazing this country is in the people who live in it acceptable for the they are and expect the most out of them. [cheering and applause] greg all right. David, what uplifting thing can you match . I have nothing that whispered president trump, if youre watching, id love to ride on air force one. Ill say hi to my friends, dan and margo. Greg pulled on her tyrus. Im excited because the go, im looking for brady and my squad to repeat. [applause] and im calling 3413, patriots in a walkway. Greg last word, kat. I dont care about the fall which is why i actually love days of important games because

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