[laughter] i made a list. Number one, comey leaked over a trump tweet. The president tweeted on friday after i got fired that i better hope theres not tapes. I boeing up in the middle i woke up in the middle of the night on monday night because it doesnt dawn on me originally that there might be corroboration for our conversation, there might be a tape. And my judgment was i needed to get that out into the public square, and so i asked a friend of mine to share the content of the memo with a reporter. Greg when i wake up in the middle of the night, i take a leak. [laughter] i dont leak in the hierarchy of honorable things to do, i go with tweeting over leaking. At least with a tweet, you know its coming from trump, for better or worse. Trump stands by his tweets. Comey hid behind a leak. He had his buddy drop it to the times to protect himself. Thats a weeny move, and i know weeny moves. Fact is, in all of this he suddenly realized trump is the more transparent of the two. Hes abrasive, hes blunt, he makes his intent obvious, but comey, he adopted an aw shucks routine to max his sneaky behavior and, lordy, it got thick. Lordy, i hope there are tapes. I dont know if i had had the presence of mind i would have said to the president , sir, thats wrong with. Thats how i conducted myself. I hope ill never have another opportunity. Maybe if i did it again, i would do it better. Greg felt like i was watching a combination of here haw and l. A. Law. [laughter] all that was missing was a strand of hay sticking out of his mouth. And hes from yonkers. Thats new york. So to reiterate, comey kind of phony. Number two, was there obstruction of justice on the part of former attorney general Loretta Lynch regarding the Hillary Clinton email investigation . At one point the attorney general had directed me not to call it an investigation, but instead to call it a matter which confused me and concerned me. Greg oh, dear. It confused and concerned me. Yet i still did it. Whats with this guy . He always seem like hes trying to do the right thing while doing the wrong thing. And youve got to love that once again hillary reappears to ruin a democrats day. If it wasnt for her, there wouldnt be this lynch thing. Shes like my it table bowel it table bowel [laughter] she just never goes away. It reminds me of a movie. She came from long ago [laughter] dont quit, keep fighting, stay [cheers and applause] but just when you thought she had been defeated why arent i 50 points ahead, you might ask. She came back. I take responsibility for every decision i made, but thats not why i lost. It wasnt enough. It really is painful. Blame it all studios presents 2017 return of the swamp queen. [laughter] coming to a Democratic Party near you. [cheers and applause] greg all right. Number three, was there obstruction of justice on the part of trump . If trump never asked him to shut down an investigation, its not obstruction. Trumps just being trump. Hes no flying nun, but hes not darth vadar either. Hes like a mix. Hes a nun vadar or a flying darth. Number four, comey doesnt feel very well. The very disturbing thing, very concerning, a whole lot of personal pain for me. That gave me a queasy feeling. [laughter] greg the guy certainly takes the job to heart. I think our new sponsor might be able to help you, jimmy. Does your boss confuse you . Shifting explanations. Confused me and increasingly concerned me. Do you feel the need to leak . I asked a friend of mine to share the content of the memo with a reporter. Does he make your belly hurt . Look, this is terrible. It makes me mildly news shus. It may be time to try queasy. Queasy battles the butterflies in your belly. He had repeatedly told me i was doing a great job and he hoped i would stay. Queasy might just save your career. Dont contact columbia law professor while taking queasy. Talk to the your doctor to see if queasy is right for you. Greg night. All right [cheers and applause] and last but not least, remember that report suggesting the Trump Campaign colluded with russia using electronic surveillance . Was that true, james comey . The challenge, and im not picking on reporters, about writing stories about classified information is the people talking about often dont really know whats going on, and those of us who actually know whats going on are not talking about it, and we dont call the press to say, hey, you got this thing wrong about this sensitive topic. We just have to leave it there. Greg or leak it [laughter] anyway, thats my list. Believe me, its not easy to take hours of complex testimony and break it down to just the main points. I dare anyone to do a better job. No collusion, no obstruction. Hes a leaker. [laughter] greg i stand corrected [cheers and applause] all right. All right, all right, all right. [applause] all right, lets welcome, lets welcome tonights guests. He is bright and funny like a glowworm that slides up your pant leg. Author of the great new book mean dads for a better america i bought it comedian tom shah shah lube. Shes so bright, she never needs a reading light, emily cam pan owe. [applause] shes as sassy as i am gassy. Coh of of of of katherine timpf. [applause] and Lake Michigan is his bathtub. Former bodyguard and my massive sidekick, tyrus. [cheers and applause] all right are. Emily, you are the lawyer here. And i, so i have to ask you, could it be that, in fact, its comey thats in trouble now . Because of the leak and stuff . He leaked government isnt that government material . Im stupid. Yes. No, youre not of d. Greg dont laugh. [laughter] absolutely. Specifically, theres a code, its 18usc641, it specifically prohibits conveying, among other things, documents and records, any type of record off the property and to anything without authority. And he faces up to ten years in jail for this. Greg wow. Its totally serious. And regardless of the Legal Definition of leak which i support you if you try to define that, the reality is he broke that code by, without authority, bringing those documents it doesnt matter if it was his own record, its a government record, and its a thing of value for the United States. What if its just his diary though and he wakes up in the middle of the night and writes a diary . Its one thing if he writes in a book by his bed, but this was on a government computer, and it was about a government meeting. And, remember, its a thing of value. So everything has a kind of traceable back play to his conversation with trump and to his position as then head of the fbi. So it matters, and theyre going to pursue it. They mentioned it today, theyre totally pursuing it. Greg tom, when you watched it, didnt you find comey to be an interesting character . Like it was almost like he was from an aaron sorkin tv show absolutely. Greg he was designed to be in a tv drama that the media loves. I loved the way he closed his testimony. Mary, do you know me, mary . Ill throw a lasso around the moon. Merry christmas, mr. Potter [laughter] [cheers and applause] was that him . Greg i think that was him. Is that Jimmy Stewart . Well, if youve got to ask [laughter] greg what was your take home from the comey why was he so scared all the time . Greg exactly. I was really worried when i had to go alone in the office with the president. I dont know why. Whats he so scared about . My favorite question was from marco rubio who said why didnt you speak up . Well, good idea, i guess i should have done that. [laughter] greg i guess hes so worried that hes so intimidated by the president. Its not that he never worked for two other president s. Trump is probably, you know, ive talked to him briefly, i know that, like, if you say, hey, i cant do that, hes like, okay. I had to ask. He always asks questions that, like, nobodys asked before just to see if it happens. He might get somewhere with that. All right, tyrus. My theory is that comey was a victim of new management. This has happened to me, somebody comes in, they reevaluate and im gone. I have a little box with all my stuff in it. Oh. Yeah, thats me and Impact Wrestling too. Honestly, man, i guess you guys havent talked to the police a lot in your lifetime. [laughter] when the guys being really coy and acting afraid and kind of throwing things up there for you and you come back aggressive, that means the bad cops coming. And comey did a very good playing good cop in this whole thing. Hes basically throwing volleyballs up for our president to hang himself with greg really . He says something, dont tweet. Youre good. But then hes got to come in and say now hes proven now he says hell testify under oath. Greg right. Now hes boxed in with the tape, because comeys like, gee, i hope theres a tape. Well, ill let you know if theres a tape. Now, if you look at that, whos lying . This guys under oath saying i hope theres a tape, and our president got sucked into that. The only person that should be talking is his lawyer. Greg if he hadnt tweeted about i wonder if theres tapes we wouldnt be here knew more tweeting. Greg even though i enjoy it immensely. It makes him the most transparent leader in the world. You know, kat, we work in broadcasting, and this is a prime example of confirmation bias. If you start out seeing trump as evil, this is going to underline your beliefs. Then youre going to see that maybe, you know, hes just exactly how isnt that how this no matter what, no ones minds are changed. Everybody watched this hearing, and theyre so happy for their guy, whoever their guy was. [laughter] greg yeah. The conservatives are insane, trump is totally toast after this, and people are saying, oh, liberals are insane, this vindicates him totally. Weve lost this thing now where its possible to be in the middle whatsoever. Greg yeah. The collusion kind of takes that apart a little bit, especially if trump was pushing to investigate. But the obstruction, again, really hard to meet that definition. But still, its weird when you think about the fact this really is all kind of trumps fault. If he would have greg we elected a bull in a china shop, and this is the broken dishes. This is it. And all these hearings are is a guy coming up with a broom going, oh, he broke another one. [laughter] but its not illegal right, exactly. Its not illegal. Greg you know what . Ill take this if he conquers isis. We can all agree its very entertaining to watch. [laughter] greg exactly. Theres no one else id rather see give a press conference than trump. On an entertainment level . Youre just lying. I find it disgusting, honestly, im tired of looking at it. Greg really . On both sides, democrats and republicans. We should be focused on other things in this country. Greg you have a good point. Do you have something important . I gotta go. Do you know the drawing of the old lady but it look like a beautiful lady . When trump speaks, he speaks in those pictures. Republicans see the beautiful woman, and democrats see the old hag. [laughter] [applause] greg no, its its the psychological picture where you think you see a womans profile, but its two lamps. Greg every high school book. [laughter] i dont see either, see satan. Anyway, later in the show are you getting fat . I am. That and other things were going to blame trump on. But first, how did the media cover the comey hearings . Lordy, i hope theres tape of it. [cheers and applause] track your pack. Set a curfew, or two. Make dinnertime device free. [ music stops ] [ music plays again ] a smarter way to wifi is awesome. Introducing xfinity xfi. Amazing speed, coverage and control. Change the way you wifi. Xfinity. The future of awesome. Greg so whats the difference between the Democratic Party and the Mainstream Media . I dont know, i was hoping you did. [laughter] take a look at medias reaction to comeys testimony. Atmospherically. Big picture, this is still a horrendous day for this president. I think what jim comey did was provide more evidence for the case of obstruction by the Trump White House without using that legal word. The former director of the fbi says possible obstruction of justice by the president is almost certainly on the table. Its one of the big shoes to drop. Greg oh, they look so great together. [laughter] surely, rachel will are agree with me that the big surprising, substantive reveal was about former attorney general of the United StatesLoretta Lynch. The big, surprising, substantive reveal today was about the current attorney general of the United States, jeff sessions. Greg okay. I guess. We watched two different things. Anyway, now i can predict how her shows going to be for the next month. But there was one chap who realized the collusion Conspiracy Theory seemed to end on thursday. The assumption of the critics of the president of his pursuers, you might say, is that somewhere along the line in the last year the president had something to do with colluding with the russians. It came apart this morning with that theory. Wheres the there there . Greg where is the there there . Where is the there there there . No one ever says that. There cubed. Anyway, how about cnn . Who puts 65 people on the air at the same time. [inaudible conversations] [laughter] greg sounds balanced to me. My god. [laughter] i turned that on, tom, sometimes just to make some noise, like to square, you know, prowlers. It remind me remember that Old Commercial where they had, like, 11 cats and 10 bowls. [laughter] they should have one less commentator and see who gets pushed greg musical commentators. They should all start each panel with one short chair, and all the panelists have to run around, and don lemons screaming. Thoughts on the media . Listen, i got did you see my leg when he was talking, Chris Matthews . I was thrilled. Greg yeah. [laughter] i cant believe he admitted that greg yes. The collusion is an illusion imrg dwrg ooh, nicely done. Collusion is an illusion. What do you think, emily . What do you think of the press . I feel like it reminds me of during the actual election when people would go out on streets and take surveys and then switch which candidate was the one who said that policy. And people automatically would be, oh, i hate that policy. It would actually be the opposite driver. No matter what we put out there, like you said earlier, it didnt matter. They were going to be all over it and. And i think itsly dicking louse that were not seeing ownership of it. Greg what do you think, kat . Everyone does it though. If there were Loretta Lynch and obama and saying i hope you can get this hillary thing go, i dont think well be sitting here going what greg i know i would, kat. Fair and balanced all the time. But, i mean, if you have trump comey saying that you have trump saying, yeah, investigate this, then maybe he probably, you know d. Greg right. Didnt do anything wrong. But then again, both sides are saying that comeys telling the truth when it helps them but hes such a liar when it hurts them. Man, we all need to greg chill out . Look at things objectively. Theres so many armchair quarterbacks. Every with every one of those hosts and analysts have become a lawyer. I googled it, totally got it now. Greg everybody says as a former prosecutor. Tyrus, as armchair, ive been asking for an armchair, every week i get this. Why is it that i cant get an armchair . Greg its not going to happen. She got a show, you got a show, all i want is an armchair [cheers and applause] hashtag armchair. Greg well, you know why. Yeah. I do. [laughter] greg its because thats the outnumbered chair. The leftout chair. Greg what do you think about the media . I dont anymore. [laughter] i dont. If i want to look for stuff to make fun of donald trump, id watch cnn, msnbc, if i wanted tough to support trump, id watch us. Everyone has their own stake in the game right now, so the truth is where in the mid somewhere in the middle. I think cnn has put so much emphasis on finding something with this russian thing, and theres just not a lot to it. Greg right. And like i said, we have muellers doing his thing, and theyre eventually going to come out. Even then when he says its suspicious but theres nothing they set the bar at watergate though. If you set it that high, its going to end up looking like nothing. So liberal media is partially to blame for that. Greg exactly. Theyre hypnotized by their own bias. Unless youve got trump and putin sitting together pushing buttons greg with hookers on their lap. Yes. Greg trump is not like them. The media really liked president obama because they were like each other. They cant like, obama is like the cool professor and trump is like your scary boss, and they just never can get over that. They never will. All right, up next, terror strikes the u. K. Who needs horror moviesthe greg. For your latest headlines, go to foxnews. Com. Greg now, i used to love monster movies, mummies, wear wolves, vampires, leave garrett. [laughter] at least the audience knows that. I couldnt get enough. But what i really loved were zombies. I really loved zombie films, especially the early ones where they moved really slow, because even if you could outrun them, they were still scary because sooner or later they would catch up to you just like puberty. Then later modern zombie movies had corpses that picked up the pace. The speed made them extra scary. Remember the remake of dawn of the dead 2004 . Holy crap but then something happened to me. Maybe 15 years ago i stopped liking zombie films. It was like i dont need these anymore. I dont need that thrill anymore. And now i know why. Who needs zombie movies when you have islamic extremism . Think about it. How is isis any different from a band of zombies . Theyre dead inside, consumed by a virus that leaves them ravenous for the flesh of human misery. Its why i dont understand the appeal of the walking dead. Islamic extremism is the walking dead. Actually, theyre worse. The walking dead, theyre a classic, slow zombie. Extremists are the zombies from 28 days later. You can see it in the footage from last weeks attack in London Bridge or in iran. They move fast, trying to inflict as much harm as possible. These are not human beings, theyre zombies. So imagine them as actual zombies. Divorce their actions from doctrine, and you know what the right response is. You have to find them ask kill the so many and kill the zombies, period. Except maybe [cheers and applause] except maybe in europe theyll have a zombie rights march. [laughter] and perhaps a documentary called the zombie next door. [laughter] after all, one of the attackers from last week was known by police and was in a documentary called the jihadis next door. How does that happen . How can we know something lurks among us that wants to kill us and still let it roam free . Maybe its because the incentive isnt to stop them, but stop you. Its the fear of being branded a racist. The Scarlet Letter that trumps all Scarlet Letters. Blow a whistle on a terrorist, you might be a hero. If youre wrong, youre islamophobic. So our actions are driven by preservation of reputation. It doesnt help that the media often conflates folks who offer solutions to fighting terrorism with bigotry. The result, you have more terror attacks. No wonder we see the same zombie movie over and over again. Were green lighting the sequels. [cheers and applause] tyrus, to me, life is a horror movie. Oh, it is, bro. It really is. Life is a horror movie, straight up. And everyone dies. [laughter] greg thank you, thats true. That was somber, right . Youre 100 right. Unfortunately, until more terrible things happen from guys that have been spotted four and five times, been turned in itll be like, ill just be that bigot and tell on your ass. [laughter] oh, tyrus, youre an islamic hater because you turned this guy in. Okay. Greg yeah. Im not getting blown up tonight, so im cool with that. [laughter] it needs to be but, unfortunately, its going to take, i mean, that guy he had a tv show. Talking about what he was going to do. As soon as he gets a chance to do it, hes in the camera like this, im coming for you. Everyones like, well, he has a right to say what he wants to say. [bleep] [applause] greg emily, how will we solve this problem if the population is scared of coming forward . The solidarity that everyone feels with these infinite victims, unfortunately, it needs to somehow be galvanized, and i dont understand why its not being galvanized into support for this proactive attack on isis, for economic and diplomatic and military and at all levels, fronts existence isis. I dont understand how, again, the solidarity is not automatically transferred into that kind of inertia and that support. And i also dont understand why as we and many people, you know, consider this globe our home and, oh, borders are ephemeral, well, then why isnt an attack in the u. K. An attack on us . How close does it have to get until its our home base . From what im hearing, especially from the left, then thats your home too. So why arent we galvanized . Greg yeah, thats true. What do you think, kat . Well, theres a lot of things that make us different than europe. We have a better screening system, muslims integrate better here. Theres a huge problem with the Political Correctness type thing. Something i wondered, they were wearing fake suicide vests, right . Was he wearing it in the van he was driving . Because i know if im in an uber and i think its a suicide vest, id be like, hey, i think this dude has a suicide vest on. If i think i might die, then im a little bit more worried about not dying, and i dont understand how thats not more of a thing. Greg yeah, thats true. Tom, you cant be tolerant when youre dead. Yeah. Its true, greg. I still havent gotten over the fact this this is the outnumbered couch . [laughter] greg yes. Does your show have a budget . Greg everything here is being used by another show, including my pants. [laughter] these are lou dobbs slacks that im wearing. [laughter] slack shorts. Its true, i loved your monologue, greg. And i cant watch drama shows that involve terrorism, because increasingly they feel they have to show both sides. Greg right. I cant watch it greg i hear mummy movie has this whole thing about how its the west thats at a fault, and im so tired of it. It always turns out, oh, no, its a case of mistaken identity. The law and order twins, oh, its not really that guy, its the rich white architect who did it. Its always the architect. Later in the show, is the president to blame for your weight gain . But first, trump dumps the paris accord and the world freaks out except for one guy. Ill talk to him next. [cheers and applause] the United States will withdraw [applause] from the paris climate accord. Greg he floored the accord. Reaction is still pouring in from around the world following the the president s announcement the u. S. Would withdraw from the paris climb accord. Heres msnbcs brian williams. A dark speech. And as you go through it, more like four or five dark speeches. Greg cnn. Its a very dramatic, symbolic blow. As i said, the United States has almost resigned from its role as leading the world. Greg a young chicago resident. [laughter] dan rather. Tsa momentous moment and a very ominous moment. History is going to punish donald trump for this decision. And the question is how much [inaudible] greg a concerned french citizen. No, no, no, no, no. [laughter] no no, no, no, no, no. Greg a brooklyn resident. No [laughter] no greg a local Law Enforcement officer. No greg and a gentleman from the south pacific. But there is one man on this earth who thinks donald trump was right to get out of this deal, and hes here with me right now, the president of copenhagen [cheers and applause] all right. Was, was mr. Trump right to get out of this particular deal . Yes. Fundamentally, it would have done almost nothing for climate, and it would have been incredibly costly. Is so getting so getting out doesnt do anything bad, but it saves us a lot of money. So, absolutely. But we do need another way to tackle Global Warming. Greg yeah, and thats i find your you have solutions. Ive read a lott of your stuff, and i edger you if urge you, read up on it. Go to prageru. Youve got a little segment up there that explains this stuff. Youre about prioritizing. Exactly. Greg you look and you say if we took all this money, this is what we could do x we could solve almost every world problem. I mean, theres a number of things we need to recognize. First, you know, were going to spend on paris about a trillion to 2 trillion a year for the rest of the century. And if we did that, if we did everything we promised in paris, we would reduce temperatures by the end of the century by about 0. 3 degrees fahrenheit. In a century. We wouldnt be able to tell the difference. Thats not really a solution, thats just wasting money. And, of course, 100 trillion can solve pretty much everything else. If you ask most people in the world what to they care about, not surprisingly they would like their kids to stop dying from easilycurable infectious diseases, get food, education, simple stuff. And we know how to do it. And then, of course, we should also fix Global Warming, but we should fix it smartly. Greg yeah. You know, its interesting, president obama and others have said if you pulled out of this accord, youre endangering children. I would argue that by skipping the priorities and spending 100 trillion, all of those things that you mentioned actually put more people at harm. So you could tell the person whos saying im for the accord, youre killing children thats what i would do. And theres, certainly, i think you can say it more diplomatically. Greg you know me. [laughter] but basically, point out, look, wouldnt you actually want to save real kids right now instead of helping them incredibly ineffectively in a hundred years . The real argument is bring people back and say how are you going to solve this problem. People think solar and wind is going to take over anytime soon, and i dont know if you know al gores own climate adviser, jim hanson, says if you believe that, thats a little bit like believing in the easter bunny or the tooth fairy. Right now the world gets 0. 6 of its energy from solar and wind and a quarter of a century from now well get less than 3 . Its trivial for the next 25 years. Now, it may solve the problem in the long run, but thats why we need to invest a lot more in research and development in green energy. Greg exactly. Do you feel that private companies are probably going to figure this out before the government steps in . Do you need both . Yes. One thing you need to remember, its really hard to be a private company to invest in stuff thats only going to work in 25 or 40 years because once it starts working, your patent has run out. Greg thats true. Thats why we have people working on a cure for cancer in public universities. We want to fund stuff that eventually will be to the advantage of mankind, but we should do it smartly. Thats what bill gates actually has said. Greg right. Im going to spend a lot more money on research and development so that well get green energy to be so cheap that everybody will want it rather than we have to push greg are you a nuke guy . Do you like Nuclear Power . So nuclear, environmentalists it has some benefits, certainly, if you look at germany just shut down all their Nuclear Power plants because they were, i dont know, worried about a tsunami . What the hell . [laughter] theyve basically already paid for them. They have to decommission them, right now they were just providing energy incredibly cheaply. Thats stupid. But building new ones turn out to be expensive. Greg how do you feel about the hysterical response . How can we reach consensus when one side says the other side is so evil . Yeah. Its really, really hard to have this conversation when some people are saying this is the end of the world, and some others say its not happening. But, of course, the real point is the u. N. Climate panel tells us in the 2070s if we dont do anything, the of Global Warming will be somewhere between 0. 22 of gdp. Its a problem. Like all other problems, we should fix it cooley. Greg you know what the end of the world is . The end of the world. Asteroids, buddy. [laughter] its coming. Greg i think so. Oh, no greg i have an asteroid suit that i wear at night. Its basically a shorty rope. Thats it. Super asteroid guy. All right. Thanks, bjorn. Copenhagen consensus, go to prageru, and youll your mind will expand. All right, still ahead, first there was the freshman 15 and now some celebrities say theyre putting on the trump 10. How dumb is that . [cheers and applause] hey youve gotta see this. Cmon. No. Alright, see you down there. Mmm, fine. Okay, what do we got . Okay, watch this. Do the thing we talked about. What do we say . Its going to be great. Watch. Remember what we were just saying . Go irish see that . Yes im gonna just go back to doing what i was doing. Find your awesome with the xfinity x1 voice remote. Greg does donald trump fatten your rump . [laughter] as whiny trump haters keep blaming their weight gain on him, now the medias trying to back up this stupid claim. They conclude that if studies show people eat more, donald trump should make you eat more because hes so stressful. Which brings us to a new segment called [laughter] greg yes, its a false flab i thought it was clever when i thought of it a week ago. Anyway, socalled execs perts experts say socalled trump induced stress levels may affect more than weight gain. One biology professor says it could cause evolutionary consequences. Yes, trump could permanently alter human genes. Professor peter ward says the stress that americans are going through now because of trump is similar to the stress felt by people who have been in combat or abusive relationships, and that leads to permanent evolutionary aftereffects. So if dealing with trump is Like Fighting the taliban or living with a wife beater. We went to the professor for further comment. [laughter] i used too much. [laughter] greg well, that was cute. Emily, does everybody just need to calm down . Yes. And this makes sense why hollywood is so skinny, right . Everyone there, they have stressless lives, nothing to worry about. It also is interesting to me why all of these people who are kind of clamoring for this, wheres the same outrage and the same kind of, you know, focus on what 80 of our medical treatment that is basically treatable on the preventive side . I mean, theres a lot of other things that make you fat. And i love, by the way, stress makes you eat more. No, you make you eat more. Stress doesnt make you do anything. Its how you react to it. Greg kat, if stress made you eat more, youd weigh 500 pounds. [laughter] do you think trump going to feel bad about it . Oh, no, Barbra Streisand is saying shes get bigger, i better stop everything im doing and everything i want for the country. [laughter] if i were trump, id be like, damn, i am powerful. [laughter] greg yes. This is amazing, and i am sure thats exactly what he thinks. Greg its a superpower, tom. I can make you eat more. Yeah. [laughter] what about the professor . Trump is altering peoples genes. Tell me thats not going to go to his head. Exactly im attarring the whole course of altering the whole course of human history. Its not working . They should do a marvel comic on this guy. Seriously the superpower to to change genes over time. Hes going to go give a speech and say, okay, were going to keep obamacare, i heard Barbra Streisand gained ten pounds. Come on, shut up. Itll be a class action. You know what . The same scientist f thats his real name, that put these things together, they say people are thick or bigboned or its genetic. Greg yeah. You know, hes not smart, hes special. [laughter] its the same thing. Sometimes youre just i chubby and dumb and you eat too much. It has nothing to do with who the hell is president. Its true. [applause] [laughter] greg what drives me crazy is now you dont need research to bolster your point. This was like the stuff that we read, the basic of this article, of this segment are articles that were just like, you know, this could be the case. We dont have any proof. [laughter] some experts say. Greg some experts say. Also they can make these accusations, but you could make this say radical islam based on previous segment, that creates actual stress in your life. So, therefore, if you said radical islam makes people fat, people would say youre crazy, right . But with trump, no, thats legit. Plus in my experience, stress makes me eat less. Im too nervous to eat greg, you have a nervous stomach, do you not . Greg its not even part of my body anymore. [laughter] im not even sure i have a stomach. I think that somebody took it, because when i eat, it just passes everything. [laughter] final thoughts up next, and a special extra segment just for special extra segment just for you. If you have medicare parts a and b and want more coverage, guess what . You could apply for a Medicare SupplementInsurance Plan whenever you want. No enrollment window. No waiting to apply. That means now may be a great time to shop for an aarp Medicare SupplementInsurance Plan, insured by unitedhealthcare insurance company. Medicare doesnt cover everything. And like all standardized Medicare SupplementInsurance Plans, these help cover some of what medicare doesnt pay. So dont wait. Call now to request your free decision guide. It could help you find the aarp Medicare Supplement plan that works for you. These types of plans have no networks, so you get to choose any doctor who accepts medicare patients. Rates are competitive, and theyre the only plans of their kind endorsed by aarp. Remember these plans let you apply all year round. So call today. Because nows the perfect time to learn more. Go long. Greg by the way, go to twitter immediately after tonights show. Weve got a special gift for you, an afterdinner mint for this wonderful meal of a show. Ill tweet out a link to my monologue from last weeks show that didnt air on kathy griffin. Its awesome. It should be up there the moment this show ends. But first, toms got a new book out that ive actually read. Tom, why should everybody buy this book . Well, i look back at the 70s, greg, and dads were meaner, moms were tougher, bullies were rougher, but somehow we turned out okay, right . Greg did we . I think we did. Greg i dont know that you did. Look, you guys have a mean dad . I bet you did, right . [laughter] [cheers and applause] greg tyrus had the worst dad. He was invisible. [laughter] no, i was scared of my dad, and, you know, i laugh about it and we tell stories about it in the book. My mom was tough too. She would give me the old lessons like punch him back. So i punched him back. Greg what you saying is when you meet bullies, its not because people should bully, a bully teaches you to fight back. Thats right. When we have to interact with people at work like you, greg, sometimes people bully you at work. Greg oh, i know, i felt that. Dobbs. [laughter] i walk down the hall, the things dobbs does to me. It helped me. It helped me be an adult, and i think we can learn something from our mean dads. Greg thats beautiful. I actually read the book, and its compulsive. I kept reading it, and it speaks to me because im a 70s kid. Its just a fun book. I urge everybody to purchase in this immediately. All right thanks to tom, emily [cheers and applause] kat, tyrus, dr. Bjorn, our studio audience. Im greg gutfeld. I because Julie Banderas is up next with the fox sport. Eric dropped my pen. Arthel dropped your pen. Pick it up. See you tomorrow. Havent mike pence taking the mic just minutes from now. Vice president mike pence taking the mic just minutes from now when he gives a keynote speech at a gala dinner in washington, d. C. The dinner wraps up a three Day Conference aimed at mobilizing religious conservatives. President trump meantime spoke at the very same conference on thursday while fired fbi director james comey was testifying on capitol hill. We will bring you all the news from the Vice President s comments as it breaks. He will be speaking any minute now. Stay tuned. A fox news alert, attorney general jeff sessions, it is in,