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Repetitive. Well, wait there were jokes . Well, i think we had to separate a little bit and just say obama was a little slow, kind of sagged in the middle. But he killed it in a lot of ways. There was a lot of good stuff he did. Larry wilmore, the best thing you can say about him is he had a bigger audience in the Convention Hall than he has on his show. I think we see why. Weirdly phoned in material, like internet jokes he kind of ripped off. Ten more minutes on the prep, please. Look at the face of the audience listening to him. It was like they had all been served gin and buttermilk. That is your friend who says hey, im doing standup tonight for the first time can you come see me . And youre like, i dont think youre very funny in person at work. Are you funny, and you go and that is what it was like. It was open larry night. Phenomenal. You know, really i think this was just a covert way of tanking your ratings. The Larry Wilmore show, i am pretty sure we feel his pain now. I think the top of the hour, basically, your career is over. Larry may not be funny, okay, but he is the kindest man possibly in that room. Because when president obama asked him, listen, just take a dive for me, let me be the funniest guy in the room. Larry was like, mr. President , im going to do it for you. That was the only thing. Can i bring in usually the most positive person here at fox news. How are you doing over there . I am bored. I am bored. And normally, 10 p. M. Hour on sunday is my time. I enjoyed the tension, that was really bad and boring. And i feel like everybody was uncomfortable at first, but then they were just too bored to even be uncomfortable. Part of it is because i am upset i wasnt invited. I am hurt i was not invited, for real. No, you will never be invited. I will be invited. I am on a nice clear incline, greg, i appreciate it if i could have a more positive reinforcement here at work. Its all down hill from here. You will be lucky if you will be at msnbc. Did you know there were not any black people at msnbc . By the way, i think joy reid is getting a new show, replacing melissa perry. Greg, you have already given enough to larry, you dont have to plug it in to msnbc. How about trump, i thought they were going to drop a safeful of fat jokes. And Larry Wilmore offered a bunch of racial jokes. That was the sad thing about the racial jokes. The audience was whiter than a pba bowling event, there was no diversity whatsoever. I cant believe i got dressed up for this. This was my guacamole stained shorts. I should have come to work and screw the makeup. Anybody else turned on by that. I heard i would have gone read and got that transparent gelato they sell, you know what im talking about . It comes in a clear thing. This is a terrible image for america. Also one they already have. I know that gelato, and its delicious. The only thing could save this what bothered me, the obama stuff was pretty good, because he really is that guy right now, like i dont care. And he is selling it hard. He had some good jokes about cnn and good stuff. But Larry Wilmore did not even bring it. Its like how hard is it to trim your set, just to give the good stuff and act like youre there to put on a show. It was so like insulting to the audience. If people were tweeting while we were watching this and they were like mad. Be funny. Like most people be funny. Like that is the first job, if youre funny, you will take anything. You know, the interesting thing about president obama was you could you actually said it while it was going on. Its like watching a macys, the thanksgiving day parade where the joke is like a float. Here comes the joke. And no one will be seated during the punch line. Exactly. At least obama, he hit the ball. Larry wilmore was striking out playing tball. He was like the catcher in the outfield, like i got it, i got it. He was terrible. The producers of that show are looking at obama going you know he is going to be free next year. And we might want to jettison larry. Lets play some of obama here. That do we have the rinse right you know what . Its one of those words you see you never have to say, you know . Like hyperbole. Dont waste too much time learning it. Do we have a clip of that . Gop chairman Reince Priebus is here, as well. Glad to see you feel you earned a night off. Congratulations on all of your success, the nomination, the Republican Party process is all going great. Keep it up. That was kind of painful. Dont you think . I mean, you know, Reince Priebus is in a very difficult position now trying to get john kasich and cruz to you know be less brutal to trump. I think that is what they have to start doing. The kasich and cruz situation reminds me that they are transforming into an equally dumpy vehicle this has been an absolute mess. And i think has to why we didnt see the whole dump on trump, people are realizing that its very possible trump could be on that stage next year. But is he going to marry hillary . He might write her jokes. [ cheers and applause ] that was a better joke than anything and larry had weeks. How is donald trump president reality star show potential president , because we have somebody like Kendall Jenner getting shout outs. These should not be equal people. What do you make of the whole event, not just what happened tonight but in general . I kind of liked it. Because i like watching people and there was a lot of that available. I mean, its fine, i guess, if i were there i would feel very cool and be excited. I dont like that youre pretending you wouldnt be. You know saying you hate this thing is like saying you didnt own a tv. Its like i didnt go to homecoming, i didnt go to it, but to a party. I totally did, nobody wanted to go with me. But its okay, i can admit that now. But its like Larry Wilmore doesnt know he was bad. Im starting to feel bad. Were kind of hard on larry right now. No, he is the nicest guy ever. No, that was awful. But i want to tell you when you go to these things though, you will end up talking about the mix of arrogance and insecurity of some of these journalists. You will end up having a drink next to some newspaper reporter, some dude, and he will lecture you loudly about the situation in raqqah, and then in the next breath he will ask you how much of my neck fat is hanging over . Does this look bad, does this look bad . Its not a place you want to be. The worst thing about it, i was a smoker in 2012. It is so hard to get out of that building. It takes you 45 minutes to go out of the building, and it just tells you how awesome smoking it. Its going to take you 45 minutes to get out there, youre like yeah, its a cigarette. I think i missed the whole thing when i was there because i was enjoying a marlboro lite. I dont know if there was a message there. Kids dont smoke. By the way, that little thing there with john boehner, that was cute. The rule of show business, everything can be shorter. The hosts can be shorter, everything can be shorter. This thing has a red carpet. For a press dinner. And also it illustrates kind of the pecking order, that is the fun thing, you want to be the butt of a joke, if youre not the butt of a joke youre nobody. We got to take a break, dont go anywhere, be right back, more stuff. Whatre you . I probably got that question 3 to 4 tim or moroccan or something else. So i jumped at the chance to take the dna test through ancestry. And my results ended up being african, european and asian. It just confirmed what i guess people had seen in me all my life. I do feel like ancestry helped give me a sense of identity. What are you . Now i know. Discover the story only your dna can tell. Order your kit now at ancestrydna. Com raise yyou know,if youve got save 500 bucks over here. No, save 300 bucks over here. Well, esurance was born online, and built to save. Thats auto and Home Insurance for the modern world. Esurance, an allstate company. Shoshow me more like this. E. Show me previously watched. Whats recommended for me. X1 makes it easy to find what you love. Call or go online and switch to x1. Only with xfinity. All right, so on friday, were going to do a story, yes, antitrump protesters swarmed the entrance to a hotel, in lovely burlingame, california, where i was born. Anyway, it was ahead of the donald trump speech. Actually burlingame has great bars and restaurants near the airport. Somebody held a sign that said dump trump. Another sign said, conman. Another had a sign, delicious crab. That is how it should be. But the crab was so big, trump and his entourage had to get out of their car, climb through a freeway barricade and enter the hotel through the back door of the that is how i get into most hotels. That is how i was banned from a hotel, with the ice bucket, no rest rooms, people. I was looking at the protesters there. There was a mix of students and elderly hippies and hired hands. I dont think many of them had to call in sick after they were arrested. I dont think they did, they looked like they were having a fun time. Protesting is a sporting event for some of these people. Im not sure if anybody vomits on anybody else because they were wearing the wrong jersey, although they were quite violent of t i do enjoy donald trump entering the venue like the blues brothers, he entered the back door. It was quite charming. I have a theory, i dont care how you feel about trump. When somebody burns an American Flag that just creates 10,000 new trump voters. It just says, i cant identify with that. Or punching somebody in the face and they get a bloody nose, that is the insanity of it. It will only guess worse, because when burnburn bernie to eventual step out of the race, where do you think his supporters will be . They will either be in the room, smoking with a gas mask if youre stoned, i guess you would not be violent, which is a positive. Rob, there is a weird theory going on here, that it will get really bad. Like there is more to come, almost like blackmail, saying if trump gets the nomination were going to have. This is going to be great tv. Violence, everything awful. You know, i mean, that is almost too much to hope for. No, i think what is going to happen if he is the nominknenom party will go down in an historic event. They had this debate about the immigration policy and you see a lot of mexican flags flying. The next day the organizers of the protest will get the word out dont do that again. In california, these were activists, they broke their own rule. Youre absolutely right, all it does is make people who are sort of neutral think, hey, wait a minute, im not so good with this. And there was a poll that came out, the negatives, the unpopularity is exactly the same. Hillary is a flawed candidate, a lot of people will support her, that will completely erode her brand. Trump is already channeling his inner bernie by talking about a corrupt system. Complete madness, only one tiny poll. It is april, he barely is below 60 , among republicans. That is a death nell, dont tell yourself these fairy tales, maybe it will help you sleep tonight but you are lying to yourself. I will say, you love cheers. That also was not real it wasnt a cheers joke at the white house correspondents dinner. Nobody knows larrys name. I am surprised that larry didnt make a sanford and son, joke. He did. Yeah, he did. Im glad i was listening. The worst part about this is that we dont have any booze. But anyway. Except you. Yeah, except me, i loaded up earlier. All right, protests, good, bad, worrisome . All of the above. What is funny not funny, its actually not at all funny. But these trump protesters are not protesting trump they just have so many emotions and they are protesting everything. You are seeing black lives matter, all of these different groups coming out. And we see this even on the news the reporters come up, theyre like why are you here . And no one really has an answer. Its like im glutenfree. No, free gluten free the gluten five i have one word for them to cure all that ails them. Midol. Uhhuh. That is beautiful. Kathy, you want to comment on this or should we comment on bobby knight . I dont know who he is, no, its okay, i dont know who any of those protesters are either, so its fine, i dont think anybody does. What are they protesting . I get theyre protesting trump, but what do they want . They dont know what they want. Its all about getting rid of something but not having a solution. But get rid of him how . Do they want him murdered . No, im serious, you dont like trump, we totally get it. I totally get you dont like trump. But here in the industry, i can see that youre mad. But what do you want . Yes, what, i dont know. Its like when somebody texts you a bunch of mean stuff and they dont even have a reason for it, they dont have a way for you to improve. Only like constructive criticism. I guess that was directed at you, jo. Last night i had too much to drink and aired all of my problems. Lets talk about bobby knight, in indiana, an actual state. Nobody is respected more there than former basketball coach bobby knight. Donald trump introduced him at a rally and got a very bobby endorsement. I was very, very selective with players during the time i was here. And ill tell you one thing, that man that was just up here a moment ago, ill tell you that son of a [ bleep ] could play for me. There you go, anyone surprised . Bobby knight endorsing trump is like Pippy Longstocking endorsing peanut. Some endorsements dont matter. How can this be surprising . Theyre both the same person. I mean, he really gets a great endorsement. He only really has one other opponent. Ted cruz, you dont see ted cruz getting he got mike pence. One of the most pensive endorsements of all time. I wanted to use that joke all day day. You know what is funny about indiana, they have a oxycontin problem, now they went to heroin, speaking of new york values, all of a sudden ted cruz is not so much against him when he comes out. I love bobby knight, i hope he is on the campaign trail, you know he is used to yelling at people. What are you looking at . Are you looking at your phone . Who does your Subway Sandwich . Bring it over here. When people would scream, bobby knight would just pick up the chair and scream. And donald trump is the winning blow hard, he is getting every alpha male lined up. Larry wilmore tried to make a joke out of this. Five times he tried. John boehner actually called ted cruz lucifer in the flesh, nobody took this claim seriously, except for us. We went through tape of ted cruz for the past year and there was one moment that made me think that john boehner may be on to something. Take a look. And the Obama Clinton Foreign Policy of leading from behind, the whole world is on fire. The world is on fire the whole world is on fire. Pretty good serving, i cant believe nobody else has this footage. Does lucifer have flesh . Because the smell of this burning flesh would be enough to make all the voters run away. The one thing i think is wrong, lucifer is such a great name. Its time for parents to say im taking that name back, im calling my kid lucifer. Say what you will about evil, but isnt it supposed to be seductive . But ted cruz is not. Right . Like lucifer, like really . That is interesting. He just kind of doesnt seem that threatening. I would be scared if ted cruz was outside of my house. I might point out that lucifer roughly translated from the hebrew is a compliment, bearer of light. He was gods favorite, that is how it goes. But ted cruz, lucifer, shouldnt he be winning . He has a lot of powers, right . The devil does well. At least in the east coast states. The only problem with the analogy is lucifer loves sins of the flesh, and as we know ted cruz is against dildoes. I think the big problem is, if you look at ted cruz and richard nix on, he kind of looks like him. The solution for that is dont close that eye. But i walk through life like this, because its just so much more fun. This is my bad eye. So i cant see that well out of it. Where is the going . Where is this going, rob . The show . Is this off the rails . Okay, its going to a big giant nasty disaster in clevela cleveland. Yeah, i mean, when you look at the protests and what is going on with trump a kasich, this is probably going to be the strangest campaign in the history of campaigns. Well, not withstanding the polls that ben likes, what theyre going for is it looks like a trouble, looks like chaos, and hillary comes in and looks like she is normal, soo e soothing healing the waters and that is why she goes to 42 states. As long as she is not behind bars. Trump puts new york in play. He puts some other states in play. But he also puts arizona and utah in play for the democrats. Dream on, dream on. Yeah, not good. All right, do you only believe the polls are wrong . Do you think how is he going to win the hispanic vote . How is that possible . Okay, so he would have to win 80 of the white male vote. The true stats that he would have to get to. I dont think its going to happen. Im saying i think its possible. Hillary clinton, the more you see her speak she is a very flawed candidate. She won, she is a senator. We all have flaws, greg. 70 more voters in the primary for the Republican Party, 20 down for the democrats. The enthusiasm is for the republicans. He needs to buy every lady in the u. S. A big box of chocolates and a big ball of bourbon. See, everybody can be bought. We have to go, thanks to rob long, ben kissle, joanne and catherine, that was fun we made lemonadess out of lemons, just like beyonce. All right, im greg gutfeld. Thank you for watching. I love you, america. whispers rocket neighbor yeah, so were just bringing your son home. dad ah greetings, neighbor. Neighbor boy. He really loves our wireless directv receiver. dad he should know better. Were settlers. We settle for cable. But let us repay you for your troubles. Fresh milk for the journey home . neighbor we live right there. dad salted meats . neighbor no thank you. dad hats then vo dont be a settler, get a 100 reward card when you switch to directv. Duracell quantum lasts longer so Kevin Jorgeson can power through the night. Sfx duracell slamtones dont bring that mess around here, evan whoo dont do it. Dont you dare. I dont think so [ sighs ] its okay, big fella. Were gonna get through this together. [ baseball bat cracks ] nice rip, robbie. Raaah when you bundle home and Auto Insurance through progressive, you get more than just a big discount. I gonna need you to leave. You get relentless protection. [ baseball bat cracks ] welcome back to hannity, welcome back to hannity as we come to you live tonight from indianapolis, indiana, we have senator ted cruz, and his runningmate, carly fiorina. We talked about this, i have been talking about it on radio for the last two weeks. And that is, i look at from the original 17 people that were running for office, and i looked at the unity you now have made with carly fiorina. I like it. I think its really healthy. And then i think okay, john kasich, and marco rubio, governor rick perry, we have people outside of government like rudy giuliani, or newt gingrich. We have some real rock stars. People that have had great records. One of the things i would hope is that america may be able to see what a potential Republican Administration may look like to help solve the problems we have. Because our bench is so much deeper. As a conservative and someone who will vote republican i want to use those stars because i think our problems need the best and brightest. Do you think that is the possibility . Absolutely, yes, i think it was one of the reasons i announced carly as my runningmate this week. Is to illustrate, to show the voters they have a clear choice. This is what the administration will look like, it will be p populated by leaders, you look at the talent on the stage this week. It was diverse, talented. You know, Abraham Lincoln put together a great cabinet, if youre weak and insecure you want to surround yourself by weak people. I dont know if you saw donald trump advising people saying surround yourself by incompetent people. It will make you look good. That is the worst advice you could possibly give young people. And ill tell you what. Here is what i will tell young people, surround yourself by people who are smarter than you who know more than you, who are amazing at executing. Bring together a team of stars behind a shared vision, a shared policy goal and then we can Work Together to bring back jobs in this country. To defend the constitution, our freedom, and to keep us safe. That is what i intend to do as president president. You know, it matters who our nominee is. It matters. You dont get to just slap an r on your jersey and say im a republican. How long, how long have we as conservatives and republicans said we actually need a real conservative. We need someone who will offer a real contrast. So what you heard was leadership 101. But let me Say Something youre a ceo, one of the biggest that is right, that is how a leader leads. But this is not just a fight for the future of our nation. And it is. It is also a fight for the soul of our party. Do we believe in values . In principles, in policies, or do we not . This is a fight worth having. And i am proud to stand next to this man, the man i believe must be our nominee, a great leader. And fight for the soul of our party and the future of our nation nation. When we factor in radical islam, there is a huge clash of cultures. Its also a clash for civilization itself, because there are people that are scheming and plotting and planning and hoping and praying and believe that if they strap bombs on their own children that and kill innocent men, women and children, that allah will award them with 72 virgins. That is also a major threat that i would hope everybody would united behind absolutely, that is a part of our fight for the future of our nation. Jobs are at stake, our liberty is at stake. And i dont want to worry who somebody will nominate to the supreme court. Im not going to worry with president ted cruz, and yes, our leadership in the world which is vital to the security here at home is at stake. There is no doubt. But if i may, this guy doesnt need a washington lobbyist to write a Foreign Policy speech for him that he can get behind the telephone. This guy knows what he needs, and what his policies are. All right, we have some good news. The question and answer period by me is now over. Well turn it over to this great audience, in indianapolis with senator ted cruz, his Vice President running mate, carly fiorina. Hannity on the record, well be right back as we continue. Jack be nimble, jack be quick, jack knocked over a candlestick onto the shag carpeting. 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About three weeks ago my husband asked me who do you want to see as teds runningmate . I quickly responded, carly. So youre our dream team. And congratulations on such a strong team that youre going to make. Thank you. When did you know do you have a question . No. Okay. I thought when did you know because its a little unconventional. I didnt think the john kasich thing worked out too well. But this was not conventional but it has gotten a very response. When did you decide . Well, listen, this was a long and serious process, were less than 100 days from the convention. You have to be vetting somebody who is prepared to step in and do the job. We started with an initial list of over 40 people we were looking at. We culled that down to 17, we began to vet them based on the Public Record and cut it down to a list of five. I found the final choice was very, very easy, for me i wanted somebody with knowledge who understood how to bring jobs back from this country. They dont come from washington, they come from small business, they come from reducing the burden from washington on small business. But i was also looking for somebody with judgment. Somebody who is not going to be rash or hotheaded or go off on the latest twitter storm and do who knows what . But someone who would be levelheaded and have the maturity and bring up the strong rivals of leaders, finally somebody with character. And character is the most important aspect. You need someone who tells the truth. Who is honest. There are a great many things i respect about carly. One is her journey from a secretary to being ceo of the Largest Technology company in the world. To being the first female ceo of a fortune 20 company. It is an amazing story, it really is. And its not easy for women fighting in the professional world. Listen, my mom was a pioneering Computer Program in the 50s, my wife, heidi, spent two decades in the business world. And i have seen the garbage women put up with in the work place. One thing i admire about carly, she stands up to bullies, bullies want you to run away, and she is not afraid of donald trump, she is not afraid of Hillary Clinton and she is not afraid of Vladimir Putin or the ayatollah. We need strong leaders who are not afraid of bullies. [ cheers and applause ] lets go back to another question. What is your question. Senator cruz, my name is nick philips, im a junior in high school. Now the sanders group, they say they would give free college. As a student i have to figure out how to pay for it. So what are your thoughts on his statement and how do you plan to combat it . Well, nick, thank you for joining us. And thank you thank you for asking that question. Listen, bernie is attracting a lot of young people and he is exciting a lot of young people. There are a number of things behind it. One, young people are fed up with what is going on, fed up with the washington corruption and fed up with the lying. I will give bernie credit, he is an honest socialist. He actually says what he believes. The Standard Approach of socialist is to give away free stuff. That is what the democrats have done for a long time give away free stuff. The simplest rule, there aint no such thing as a free lunch. If you look at young people right now, if you sat down and tried to design an agenda to hammer out the living arrangements, it would be better than the agenda for the clinton economy. Young people are coming out of school buried in student loans. I know what it was like, when i was a junior and senior in high school, my parents went bankrupt. So when i went to college i had two jobs to help pay my way through school. I came out of school with 100,000 with school loans. I had a mortgage but didnt have a house. I get what it is like. Right now young kids are coming out of school, they cant find jobs. The problem with bernie, you give everybody free college, how do you pay for it . You jack up colleges on Small Businesses, which means you will be young, out of college and fewer opportunities for jobs than you have now. The answer i want to see for young people is were going to reduce the regulations and repeal barack obama. Well pass a flat tax, reduce the burdens on Small Businesses. So that nick, when you come out of college you will experience something that has been the case for most of the history of america except the last seven years. You will come out of school and you will have two or three or even four or five job offers. You will call your parents and say mom you cant believe it of the i can do this, or this, or this. Lift the burdens on Small Businesses so the economy explodes so you have a bright future. That is what this election is all about. It would be nice if kids graduated college and dont have to move back home with mom and dad in their basement. Well be right back with more questions from the audience as we continue with ted cruz and his runningmate, carly fiorina. With hannity on the record, well continue. Indianapolis, many sleepaids have Pain Medicine but zzzquil is different because why would you take a Pain Medicine when all you want is good sleep . Zzzquil a nonhabit forming sleepaid thats not for pain, just for sleep. Ryou know, from Car Insurance sacompanies shouting, save 500 bucks over here. No, save 300 bucks over here. Wait, save 400 bucks right here. With so many places offering so much buck saving, where do you start . Well, esurance was born online, raised by technology, and majors in efficiency. So, theyre actually built to save you money, and when they save, you save. Thats auto and Home Insurance for the modern world. Esurance, an allstate company. Click or call. Welcome back to hannity as we continue for the hour, were in indianapolis, indiana with senator ted cruz and carly he fiorina. We have a wonderful hi. Thanks for joining us. What is your name . Cindy. Your question . Im from indiana. And originally from texas. And ive voted for you in the early primary voting. Its a pleasure to speak with you. My question is what will you do on your first day in office as president . Cindy, thank you for that question. I pledge to do five things on the first day in office. The first thing is rescind every illegal and unconstitutional executive action that barack obama made. Where a nation of rule of law needs to follow the laws. Second thing is instruct the department of justice to open an investigation into planned parenthood and prosecute any and all criminal violations. The third thing i intend to do on the first day is instruct every federal agency and the federal government the persecution of religious liberty ends that day. The fourth thing i intend to do is rip to shreds this catastrophic Iranian Nuclear deal and the fifth thing is beginning to move the American Embassy in israel to jerusalem. And ill tell you, cindy, in the days that follow, im going to instruct the department of education that common core ends today. We have 30 seconds left. If you become the president , how big a role will carly have . An integral role. One of the things she said im not good at going to funerals and not good at cutting ribbons. I said who would want a Vice President that is anything but an active and engaged partner helping to lead the country and turn it around. Weve got to take a break hannity onned road continues. Sfx climbing sounds duracell quantum lasts longer so Kevin Jorgeson can power through the night. Sfx duracell slamtones so strap yourselves in businefor action flo e know. Small business edition. Oh, no im up to my neck in operating costs ill save the day for plumbers and bakers and scapers of lawn, shes got customized coverage you can count on. You chipped my birdbath now youre gonna pay not so fast i cover more than just cars and trucks. Action flo did somebody say insurance . Children flo action flo cut can i get a smoothie, please . Ooh they got smoothies . For me. Now its war, they band i want them dead lves. The fleas and ticks . Their whole gang. We can do that. Only bravecto kills fleas ticks for up to 12 weeks with one tasty chew. Starts killing fleas in two hours and kills nearly 100 in under twelve. And its fda approved. Bravecto is for dogs 6 months of age or older. Dont worry, princess, well settle the score. Tonight we ride, with bravecto ask your vet about 12week protection with bravecto. Welcome back to hannity. Unfortunately, that is all the time we have left. I want to say thank you to senator cruz, thank you to carly fiorina. Give them a hand. Thank you were out of time for tonight. Thanks to all of you for being with us. Have a great weekend, well see you all on monday. Isis ruthless in expanding their socalled state. The peshmerga. Theyre an Incredible Fighting force. Our efforts have been atheme it so far. They call for attacks in europe and in america. The threat is growing in terms of scale and scope. Can isis be stopped . Live from americas news headquarters, a key endorsement for texas senator ted cruz. Former california governor pete wion

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