anything that your son did not allow me too do. he allowed me too push them, to challenge them, to beat him up and do it ever had to do to get him to think differently. brian: let's move through to other athletes really quick wit michael phelps ardea multiple metal champion but not happy. what did you discover what it do tap into continue the success only to have balance? >> i had the audacity to look at michael phelps who would probably just won eight gold medals until we have not seen your best yet i can tell. [laughter] hate looks at me like i'm completely nuts. i said i am talking about you are right not 18 or 19 years old. and right now you are rebelling against the machine. you are going through adolescence you are talking about rebelling against your coach. you are a surrogate parent. so that is what human beings do but it's getting in your way of going to the next level because the game, the olympics is all