Ahhhh. Ahhahahahahahaha from Comedy Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart. cheers an captioning sponsored by Comedy Central d applause jon welcome to the daily show, my name is jon stewart. Boom top tea guest, andrew napolitano, suicide pact. Its really funnier than it sounds. But first, while we were all home last week, ridding the nation of its turkey scourge laughter they know what they do. The grand jury verdict in missouri was deciding that Ferguson Police officer now former Ferguson Police officer Darren Wilson did nothing indictful whbl he shot unarmed but large michael brown. The angry reaction to this decision was swift and sustained. The protests breaking out throughout the country. Those who took the streets it thought they were speaking out against systemic injustice, but they could not have been more wrong. This is not a civil rights issue. Its not a black white situation. Its a thugpolice officer situation. People forget, he had committed a robbery. Michael brown was the bad guy in this case. And please, america, lets not turn this kid into some kind of civil rights lauder because that he is not. Ferguson missouri is not sell ma, alabama. Right laughter almost by definition. laughter ferguson, missouri, is not selma, alabama. Of course, if fox had been around for selma, alabama, the headline would probably have been, relax, selma is so this isnt a civil rights thing. But i dont know. The protests i saw seemed pretty civil rights. From those in los angeles to the nfl, to the streets right here in new york. [bleep] [bleep] voices [bleep], they people [bleep] [bleep]. Are able [bleep]. I feel you. laughter but i get what you are saying there. This is an isolated incident. Like the Police Shooting of tamir rice in cleveland or dante parker in San Bernardino county or Kendric Mcdade t or Armand Bennett what time does colbert start, it is like a half hour, right. All right, well just well move on. The point is these shootings are clearly not a manifestation of it systemic inequality and mistrust between the Africanamerican Community and the somehow always justified police americans. But these are merely an unending bizarrely similar series of isolated incidents. laughter but if there is nothing to just few the anger and protests it in these communities, why would so many individuals around the country spend their precious, hardearned prechristmas sale stampeding time protesting a nonexistent conflict. You look at ferguson, they had a community that really worked, or it seemed to have worked. And now all this had receipt is coming out. You have so many other people inciting and trying to get their own two cents in and trying to incite problems. Pitting white against black. I think the racial arsonists in this country have worked these people up so much with propaganda, that facts dont matter. Oh, thats why. They take to the streets it. They were incited by racial arsonists. You know, i have a dream. That one day we can evolve as a people to day time when arsonists no longer see race. laughter but see really only the beautiful consuming fire they are when an arsonist can say the only color i see is orange. But i get it, theyre obviously wouldnt be a problem if a racial arsonis arsonist if a racial arsonist hadnt if a racial arsonist hadnt lit the fire under ferguson with his telling of what happened with a match. And by the way, racial arsonists were not the only inciters. These traition racketeers. Race hustlers race grievance industry leaders. Your race drifters, your race counterfeiters, your race litters, your race financial advisors, your race some oliers. What is wrong with a nice white . But applause but the point is, these protests it may look like a spontaneous groundswell of frustration, grief and anger amongst the community that feels disten franchised. But theyre actually just the prescribed bidding of americas race grievance puppeteerears. And who might they it be, you ask . Professor . The floor is yours. The president and eric holder and al sharpton, i think theyve been terribly irresponsible. Ferguson burns because of in part a mindset was created by al sharpton, by eric holder and the president. Be honest my friends, are those the three people responsible or did you just name the only three black guys you could think of . laughter applause ferguson burns, my friend, in part because of jayz the gi what plays urkel and lets say hank aaron. I dont know. Now heres where it gets interesting. What is the mindset that has been instilled, that creates the condition for this upset within the Africanamerican Community . The head of this Network Roger Ailes has brilliant leigh said if you see yourself as a victim, then will you become a victim am but if you see yourself as a winner, then you will eventually win. Keep a dream journal, folks. laughter our victim then tallity is what is causing this. A victim mental at this time. A gentleman on fire. A gentleman on fox news said that black people have been convinced by a network of shrewd prop gandists that they are somehow victims. And that is wrong to agitate a population, to scare them, utilizing all the tools of modern communications, graphics, et cetera. To stoke these people into a resentful frenzy. Fox news feels it is damaging to this great nation and cares tears at our very fabric. I cant imagine anyone would do such a thing at that time [bleep]. The president is selling class warfare. Is there a growing antiwhite People Movement in america. The feds and many state governments are working hard to take that way your guns. Meanwhile they will take your money. The invasion of illegal immigrants. We have terrorists crossing the mexican border. Singled out for its christian message. We can pick on white guys, on christians. Food stamp abuse, feeding on taxpayers. The United States of entity tellment. Theyre stealing our money and the taxpayers should rise up. We are under a tir nanny now. All hail king obama imperial president. Americas freedom is slepping slipping away. America you, you have a choice to make. It is time we take our country back. You need to get angry. Our worst fears might very well be here. [bleep]. I dont know. I dont know if im supposed to dwrefer throw the government or get one of them panic rooms. I dont know what to do it but either way, im just happy to not be incited. It almost makes you think that the crime that the really up set about over there isnt race pimping or race arson, its race plagiarism. Well be right back. Well be right back. cheers and applause without saying one word. So i listen. Then i give it back. What are you chasing . Hennessy. Never stop. Never settle. Ooh no, no hey tommy no, thats mine. No no no no. Tommy do not drink that hey man, thats mine too lip smacks fuel up for battle with dew® and doritos to unlock exclusive call of duty® advanced warfare ingame rewards. [remote chime] [dragon sounds] whoa. Welcome back. Obviously it is a very heavy and emotional first act. You know, so brace yourself. Because were going into the heart of darkness, thats right, pigs. No, dont look away. Look into the face of horror. Look it look at horrors tiny galoshes, all four of them. Last month we talked about a new jersey state bill that would pan pig gestations that were unbelievably small. They couldnt move, they couldnt turn tarnd. Yeah, aww. Well, apparently one of the interesting it questions is that they like to move around. The bill passed the new swrersee legislature easiliment timely i have to imagine it is going to be a very Merry Christmas for pigs in new jersey. Today governor christie vetoes a controversial ban on certain pig crates calling the bill partisan politics. What . He vetoed it . Controversial bill, partisan politic as soon as the billpassed the new Jersey State Assembly 5313. The new jersey state senate, 321. When did the threshold for nonpartisan become unanimous. This fill was favored by 93 of new jersians. There is literally nothing else in the state that gets that kind of sport. Going for cheese steaks down the shore with bruce springstein, only 86 . Track suits, topout at 88 . And i think you know in new jersey, born to be comfortable. Under what circumstances is that fill partisan or controversy tal. Christian has gotten pressure from iowas gof goff governor to not sign the bill. Iowa is home to the first in the nation president ial caucuses and also about 20 million pigs. So that is why it is controversy tal and partisan. Your choice was either listening to the nearly unanimous voice of the people that elected you or saying [bleep] them, and kowtowing to a state a thousand miles away in exchange for really, lets be honest, the slimmest chance of political gain t in a caucus youre not going to win. Sir, sir, youre not winning. You could ride into sault city on a tractor made of [bleep] a feel of dreams dvd, youre not going to win. I mean honestly. Let the pigs turn around. I mean the way chrisiest decided this thing, you think, you think we were on the precipice of pigs running amok throughout society. A woman was booted from her u. S. Airways play escorted off after her pig became disruptive. Oh my god, i apologize, we should have listened to you crist christie, will you be president. Youre like a scientist in a disaster movie that no one believes until it was too late. I didnt relize pigs were running around on planes. So if i may, whats with this knotter [bleep] pig on this mother [bleep] plane. The woman stuck the 70 pound potbellied pig in a duff tell bag. She calls him her emotional support animal. Jon look, i get some people need he motional support animals, but putting a pig in a duff el bag and launching it into the sky, if anybody needs emotional support in that situation, i think its the creature that has no idea what the [bleep] is going on. Hes in a bag. His ears are popping. I think your pig needs his own emotional support pig. I think and you know what, by the way, that pig apparently flies all the time testimony a little xanax, neck pillow, hes all right. Maybe pigs shouldnt be anying but there has to be a middle ground between locking pigs in tiny cages and letting them run amok on airplanes. Something that combines space with economy, maybe the backseat of a ford fiesta. Ford fiesta, keep your pig in one. But how bad could the pig even have been . Another passenger said the pig didnt smell so good. And then it became incontinent. As the owner tried to enclue up the mess, the pig began running back and forth. Yeah, this is in is your captain speaking. If you lack to your rit will you see the grand canyon, if you look to your left, you will see a squealing pig taking a dump on the drink cart. Enjoy your flight. You know when are you sitting on a flight, watching a [bleep] pig run up and down the aisle, or watching any governor [bleep] all over a chance to do the right thing,s thiss the time you just want someone to walk in and say that will do t pig, that will do. laughter well be right back. Can i pet your cloud please . Sure [ rumbling ] woah aah he doesnt like to be touched there. Mmm [ male announcer ] pet the rainbow taste the rainbow. [ male announcer ] pet the rainbow hey man, have you tried the voice yeah, its amazing. One 6 . Especially with things that dont normally work with regular texts like sarcasm. [sarcastically] please bring amanda. Shes soo fun. Or if you want to sing a message. [singing] do you need anything from the store. Like 2 milk or skim . Or just getting around words that are really hard to spell. Tell the mcdonahaneys that we cant go camping because our exchange student, thelonious, has arachnophobia, which is a shame because we prepared a smorgasbord of charcuterie for his bicentennial jamboree. Welcome back, my guest tonight is the senior judicial analyst for the channel, his new book called suicide pact. Please well company back to tour program judge andrew napolitano. Come on, judge, come on. applause judge, you have been on this for your whole career. This idea, its called suicide pack that we are losing our Civil Liberties. Where is my emotional sport animal. Jon we could bring you a tea cup pig, if you want, as you saw we have many dogs you could pet. I want that three legged dog, that my favorite one. Jon that is my dog, he is very lovely. You wouldnt aw, here is what happened. He had four, but he didnt listen. We got him at three. Let me ask you this. Civil liberties. Yes. Something you an i agree. Jon is it something that you feel, is it like a beach body . Can you get it back after its gone . Is it the kind of thick that once it erodes we have no ability to reclaim it. And what is the possibility we rarely reclaim it once the government takes it from does. We are still paying off debt on world war i. We are still suffering under laws that made it a crime to disagree with the government in world war i. Because government likes power. Its easier for it to accomplish its purposes when it doesnt have a nasty thing like freedom of speech in the way. So i write these books, im an equal opportunity criticizer, as you know. This goes after george w. Bush and barack obama. I write these books so the American Public knows that with every tick of the clock, liberty is being lost. Jon but its not just executive power. For instance, you know, with barack obama, with his, the Bombing Campaign in iraq and syria, congress could have stepped in with the immigration edict, congress could step in. Why dont they . Congress is as much a cull split culprit as president bush and president obama have been. Congress could stop a lot of this with a majority vote. They lack the political will to do it. Members of both parties. The democrats give too telephone power to democrats. Jon the judiciary could step in. Absolutely. Listen, barack obama killed americans with drones. The grandfather of one of those americans tried to stop him before it happened. The court said the president wouldnt do that. You want to issue an order to the president telling it him not to kill people. We dont believe he would do it. As soon as they threw the case out, over went the drones, dead went the american. People need to know that this was. Jon there was no did and youre saying there was no due process within that. The american was someone apparently working with alawi. That wab the same american that the pentagon invited to give lectures it too. Same guy. And his 16yearold kid. Due process required that the government wants life, liberty or property, they have to try you. Jon give knee an avatar that is exemplary. A country that does protect is there a country, is there a system that protects us or are you spitting in the wind to some extent for a world that doesnt exist anywhere . I dont think there is a country on the planet that protects it freedom the way americans. We have more freedoms it rz so. Jon so were bad but were the best. Yes, but we could be a lot better, mr. Stewart. Jon but now im in trouble. Why are you in trouble . Jon because you have given us an aspiration, were only competing against ourselves. Yes, we are competing against ourselves. Because every president that does things that are unlawful, uses the example of his predecessors who got away with it. Jon but if we are the best in this system, so that would be like saying if i may, lets get rid of capitalism, even though its the best economic system. You dont believe that for a minute, that we should get rid of capitalism. Jon im telling you that is what im saying is you have the best were doing the best. But we could be doing better. We need to know that our rights come from our humanity, and not from the government. Jon but then that applause understanding that, but lets also be realistic about people. Now lets use the middle east as an example. Egypt as an example. They have this amazing revolution. Millions take to the streets, call for the overthrow of an autocratic regime. They bring in a democratic system. They elect the muslim brotherhood, a group that we dont like. They institute certain things that feel dont like. They rise up again. General sisi takes over. Really cracks down on Civil Liberties that people couldnt be happier. I done know that the people couldnt be happier. I think hes very popular right now. I think hes popular because hes giving away the store. But hes taking more liberties than mubarak. The reason he let mubarak out of jail so that when he gets overthrown, he wont have to go to jail. You think hes the next dictator. Yes, i do. My point being this. Is the problem really his government . Or does it lie in us and our desire for safety and for law and order and for authority . On that we agree it because when the people are afraid, they will surrender their liberties for safety. So it is but even when theyre not afraid. It is in their interest to keep the people afraid so we will pay more taxes it, let them regulate more of our behavior and they can put their arms around us and supposedly keep us safe. But shouldnt there be a distinction between when we should an afraid. Are there times it we should be afraid. Is there nothing to fear. Shouldnt we fear people pouring tox tyns into water. Of course we should fear those things it and of course there should be laws against it it. So its a balance. No, its not a balance. Its a bias in favor of freedom t a bias in favor of freedom. Freedom and safety are not equal. Freedom is the i see what you are saying. Because we are born with freeh dom. Anybody he from new injuriess knows that. I thought we were born to run. Stick around because i want to ask you about this. Stick arkt, suicide pact is on the back shelves now. Judge an draw napolitano, ladies and gentlemen. Get to tmobile and knock out your gift list. With zero down and zero interest on all the hottest gifts. Like the Samsung Galaxy note 4 and the note 10. 1, plus the beats solo 2, the ue boom and more. Yep all of them, zero down, zero interest. We know, were out of control. Looks like the big guys job just got easier. Good morning. Morning. [beep] your morning could use a hand. Taco bells steak and egg a. M. Crunchwrap with a hash brown inside. A whole breakfast in one hand. [bong] [ male announcer ] give extra. Get extra