Captioning sponsored by Comedy Central cheers and applause jon hey, everybody, well company to the daily show. My name is jon stewart. Last show of 2012 and obviously if the mayans are correct laughter last show. Our guest tonight my niece kristen leibowitz will be joining us im sorry, stewart. She must have changed it. I want to thank everybody, boy, that 121212 concert last night, everybody that much wad, everybody that participated, everybody that says you have no idea how it boyd the spirits of everybody there. It was just it was good. Thank you so much. But lets begin tonight with the discussion of marriage. As you know marriage is under attack. So much so that our Congress Passed a defense of marriage act. And president clinton signed it into law because it was the 90s and everything was ironic. laughter the defense of marriage act protected marriage from the scourge of no fault divorce and economic volatility and family care issues that put so much strain on marriage im kidding. It was about gay people. It protected marriage from gay people. In fact, gay people are considered such a threat to marriage that in addition to a federal defense of marriage act many states have enacted constitutional amendments banning the practice, including our most populous state, california. And our most reluctant to finally repeal interracial marriage bans, alabama. They did it in the year 2000, roll tide of history. Before you get too smug on alabama remember the Supreme Court didnt even turn it over until 1967 so [bleep] us. But this is different. I mean the Supreme Court is to the going to get involved if gay marriage. Samesex couples are finally getting their day in court. This time the u. S. Supreme Court Justices have decided to hear two constitutional challenges to federal and state lawsment one case involves the federal defense of marriage ago or domo. The other is a challenge toical calls prop 8. Jon first of all, i cannot believe he managed to squeeze a report in before prom. Second of all laughter secretary of all, secretary of all and perhaps more importantly, the Supreme Court is going to rule on gay marriage which brings to us the latest installment in our long running series, lgbtq watch [bleep] just got real he. It is hard to overstate how big a deal this could be for gay marriage. This is going to be the ultimate definitive determination. And that could result in what would essentially be 9 roe v. Wade of gay rights. Jon so it will be settled. I mean who argues about abortion any more. laughter remember those days . Today . This afternoon . laughter im sure the opponents will figure out Something Like sure, you can get gay married but first one of you has to have a transvaginal ultrasound. One of you does have a vaginal we can trans, dont you . laughter now this is very crafty case for gay marriage proponents to bring to the Supreme Court. As the case sets it is a bit of a trap for conservatives. The domo case considers whether someone lived with a domestic party for 35 years should have to pay estate taxes whereas had they been parried as husband and wife she would not have to pay estate taxes. Jon theres the question, conservatives, you can eliminate the estate tax for a whole lot of people but only if you let them get gay married. laughter its a veritable reagans choice. laughter what are we going to do . applause gay marriage or double taxation. Gay marriage or double taxation. Obviously the positions on this issue have been well staked out. Proponents of gay paerj say their unions are deserving of the same dignity, respect and rights as those of straight couples and are asking for nothing more than equal protection under the law. To which their opponents smartly argue ive been waiting to ask you this question. Go on. If the space dont love, can three people love each other. Is it possible for three people to genuine lovely open and want to share their lives together. Jon oh my god, oh laughter oh my god no no way no way cheers and applause laughter jon is Lindsay Graham about to propose to mccain and lieberman . laughter imagine liebermans response. Im the happiest man. Im in a threeway tie for bride. laughter actually, Lindsay Graham is page the ageold slippery slope argument. I mean if gay people can get married why cant three people get married or ten people, or anybody to anything. Again, placing gayness into the category of whimsical desire for something unconventional as opposed to a state of being who you are. Going up against the Supreme Court, these guys are going buy some [bleep] slippery slope argument. Justice Antonin Scalia was answering questions about his legal writing. A student on monday asked why scalia in past writings has compared sodomy laws to laws on beastiality and murder. Jon scalia good old slippery sodomy slope scalia. Ruff laugh aka antonin, aka lips manlis from the dick tracy movie. Totally a pairing, you see on one of those web sites where the people look like other people. And then you click on it. laughter anyway, another standard bull [bleep] slippery slope argument. Dont worry im sure Antonin Scalia has a much more of explaining it. It is a form of argument which is called a reduction to the absurd. If we can to the have moral feelings against or objections to homosexuality, can we have it against anything . Im surprised you werent persuaded. Jon yeah. I am surprised you arent persuaded, gay student who asked why i cate is his love life with murder. No wonder scalia never lets himself be recorded. Now the court wont hear arguments on the matter until the spring. And probably wont decide until next summer. You guys better hurry it up. Because i hear new york is thinking oflyizing this i now pronounce you applause jon you know what . If we as a culture have no objection to priests singing laughter what is to stop them from murder . laughter well be right back. nt d . Jon welcome back. Now journalism may be suffering in america but in most america its flour shalling. Wyatt cenac has more in this, his final report. Reporter in puerto rico the most Popular Television show is called superxlucido starring la comai and its a a news program. In fact, this juggernaut gets 40 of the puerto rican audience and crushes most other Major News Networks in the state. Though i traveled to san juan to learn their secret. Is it just me or is there a weird monster lady right there . No, she is a journalist. Shes a journalist. Yes, she is. This is like the famous. I came here to talk to puerto ricos most trusted journalist. Yes, people get if yous from me. This is a puppet. Its a lady. I dont understand how your journalists. Because we do investigations all the time. This is watt world will be within 50 years from now. Men and foam women. Thats right. We are the future of the world. All right, you know what, im out . Im out, im out. Hey, wyatt, thank you, goodbye. Hey, wyatt. This had to be some sort of joke. So i decided to do something i hadnt done prior to flying all the way down here to report in a story in the first place. Watch the show. And there she was grilling the puerto rican governor forestalling a murder investigation. Interviewing all the candidates for the latest gubernatorial race. Busting a newspaper for bribing a senator. I watched this puppet for hours do things no flesh reporter could do. I wish i could learn from her. I mean how are people doing it . Gracia. laughter oh my god. No somehow the magic or puerto rican rum had transformed me. I had to go back. I needed to understand. So looks like im a puppet. Yes, sir. Can you show me the path. Teach me to be a better journalist . There was so much i needed to learn. You had to have a how do you say pantalones. You had to have find out about political corruption. Yes, you have to be sure, that what we are saying is is the truth and nothing but the truth. To be very smart as i am. But i was still missing one key ingredient, murrow had good night and good luck. Cronkite had thats the way it is. And comae has got thats what it is. Thats a catchphrase . Yeah. laughter that really means what a huge candle. Thats right, thats right, wyatt, thats right. Wyatt, thats the first words that had to use in order to be a good journalist. Thats right. All right, ill do it. All right, can you guys help me get down off this chair . My time had come to finally speak truth to power. I arrived in our nations capitol and found inoperation all around my. I now had the pantlones to ask the questions that no one was willing to ask. Here was my moment. Time to show the press corps how a real journalist does it. I will see be here obviously to take your questions on all issues. Jay. Let go, et go. Get out of here. No wyatt cenac, ladies an gentlemen. Nice job. applause i would , i got to tell you, terrific story but it seems like an incredible journey for you personally. It was, john. This one really changed me. Yeah, i can see that. Sadly now you have uncovered the severson Investigative Journalism you are on to bigger and better things. Thats right, it was a tough decision but this was my last daily show. Jon yeah. Nope, nope, nope, dont make it harder. Jon wyatt i just wanted to tell you that in the years that youve been here, its been incredible to work with you. You are an unbelievably talented man and really fun to watch. Dow mean that . You really you really mean that . applause you mean that . Jon i dont know. You were just saying how you. Jon yes, i know, its leak in the piece, you know, its just easier to talk to the puppet, i guess. I just im really going miss you. Aw well be right back. Wyatt cenaeveryberybody cheers and applause my guest tonight a fine actress stars in the twilight movies, her new movie is called on the road. Jon damn hippies. Please welcome kristin stewart. cheers and applause how are you . Place plaus nice to see you, thanks for coming on the show. This is cool. I cant believe im sitting here. Stephen its real lucite, baby. Let me ask you, so i would think the hardest thing to do in acting is dance, like just be uninhibitied. I dont think i can barely do it at parties when im hammered. You know, this is me most of the time. Im definitely a wall flower. Absolutely. Stephen so how do they what do they do to get you guys to be uninhibitied or to let loose . Do they have to is that two hours into it, how do they do it . Youre doing on the road, dont mess it up. Did you feel that pressure. Yeah, i think that was the main thing that sort of kick started everything for us, is we sort of felt like we would do anything for it yeah, i was pretty scared of that scene. Because my mom homes are few and far between where i really get to exhibit, you know, like pure sort of wild nature, exuberance. Stephen and are you such a muse in the film that it is such an important catalyst element. Yes, it is. She definitely needed to represent what the it of on the road is. Stephen right. And wordilessly sort of needed to. Stephen have you heard from the beat generationment i would think your generation wouldnt necessarily be as invested in it, you know, because even i, it was before my time. We all read it in high school, catcher in the rye and on the road and all that. No, you didnt. Stephen oh, what, are you kidding me . I got many a scene, yeah, i z all those. When did you start acting. I was like 9 or 10. Stephen and was that pretty fulltime like did you go to regular school, did you go to like more of a i guess on the set type thing. I stayed in Public School until i was in middle school and then i sort of, i needed to keep my grades up. And that didnt work in Public School. Stephen when they are doing that on the set, do you have to run through all that like when i was a kid we had to like read, you know, on the road and then deliverance but they woon even do that now in sdoorbltion is too controversial i would guess. But how do they, what do they do . Just have a guy in a trailer like read this and that is the extent of it. Let me see at that point i saw on the road on a reading list as a freshman that is how i read it for the first time. Probably says something about the schools, i think it is usually a little older or possibly not at all. Stephen right. Nowadays that would be one of those banned books that like its almost like in foot loose now, you cant have this kid dantzing. Right. Stephen you know, i dont want him reading about driving and dancing. All that driving. Stephen and that sort of thing. Yeah, i dont know. I went to more progressive. Yes. Stephen well, thats nice. I kind of got to design my curriculum some. What it was cool . In high school. Yeah. Stephen this has to be california. It was independent study. I was an actor, you know. Stephen was it other acker, was it like other actor kids or just a regular california. I think i could have gone to a prom. I was invited to a prom. I was like who is going to show up to a prom. The school barely exists in a literal there was a prom at that school. Yeah. Stephen so it was really a kid asked you to his house. Yeah. Stephen come to my basement its prom thats great. You were involved in this film though, even before you, you know, quote, unquote, hit, the before the big twilight movies and all that. What drew you to it before any of this other material . I would have done anything on this film. I would have followed in a caravan or cated for everyone, done prop service. Was it the novell that spoke to you, was it something that just hit you the right way and you felt like man, i just want to be involved in that. Yeah, it was my first Favorite Book it was the first time, i always did okay in school but it was the first time that i had, i mean, you know, for a lot of people it sort of, i really came alive. I opened a lot of doors. You felt passionate. Yes, definitely, yes, definitely kick started something in me. Stephen passion enough to cater. Thats right, thats right. Because i did not think that i could play that part at all. Stephen i can tell you about the sad truth about my acting career. I actually have catered. Thats sweet. Jon that is the extent of my acting career. Nice. Jon it was a terrific performance and they get a lot out of everybody in that thing. You feel that period and you feel the moment. And for a move thael they say is unfilmable you did a hell of a job. All right, thanks. Stephen on the road, opens in select cities december 2 1st. Kristin stewart. applause