From comedy centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with trevor noah. cheers and applause trevor welcome to the daily show thank you so much for tuning in im trevor noah. Our guest tonight, i could not be more excited, Woopi Goldberg is here, everybody cheers and applause joining us on the show, does she have a movie or a book to promote . No. Shes here because shes Woopi Goldberg. Thats why. cheers and applause but first, there is been a lot of chatter about whether president donald j. Trump committed obstruction of justice. Some people say yes, some people say no. One guy says maybe, and hes the guy who matters. Breaking overnight President Trump reportedly now under investigation for obstruction of justice. Special Counsel Robert Mueller looking into whether he inappropriately tried to get the f. B. I. To drop its probe into National Security advisor michael flynn. The president was back talking about the investigation again. Why is hillarys familys dealings not looked at but mine are. Destroyed with hammer. Met with attorney general days before cleared and they talk about obstruction. Trevor come on, how long is President Trump going to talk about Hillary Clinton . In the distance future, President Trump will be in a hospital bed and the grim reaper will visit and he will be, like, what about crooked hillary . And the grim reaper will be, like, i am crooked hillary. I knew it i knew it laughter anyway, its moments like this that inspired us at the daily show to preserve trumpas tweets as the Historical Documents that they are, with the donald trump president ial Twitter Library that you can visit starting tomorrow where Donald Trumps greatest tweets will be memorialized for the rest of all time or three days, whichever comes first. Recently, everyone has been so absorbed with the whole trumprussia story, many have forgotten things are happening in congress, mainly healthcare. For seven years republicans have had one major legislative priority and thats been building a 60foottall coal powered mechanical jesus to defend america. Just kidding. 70 feet tall. Just kidding. The main goal repealing and replacing obamacare. Now that goal is within reach. Its taken so long its probably felt like sex with sting. audience reacts if you remember, back in may, the house managed to pass its version of trumpcare and trump celebrated by conducting a backyard symphony. applause cheering what we have is something very, very incredibly well crafted. We dont have the talk about this unbelievable victory. It wasnt unbelievable, so we dont have to say ut again. But its going to be an unbelievable victory, actually, when we get it through the senate trevor only trump would say we dont have to say its unbelievable, then immediately say its unbelievable. laughter this is how stubborn donald trump is. He doesnt even listen to the word no when it comes from himself. laughter okay, no more unbelievables. bleep you, me, unbelievable laughter the house passing the bill was a major step toward repealing obamacare and obviously republicans were thrilled. You know who wasnt, though . Almost everyone else in the country. Turns out only 17 of america supported the house bill. Do you know how small 17 is . You could fit everyone who loved that bill into one backyard. Thats how small it is, which is basically what republicans did, to be honest. 17 . Like, if you were a kid and you got 17 on a test, your parents wouldnt ground you. Like, they wouldnt beat you. cause you just wouldnt go home. laughter you would just look at that paper and be, like, well, i guess my life is a drift of begins. All right, here we go, here we go. laughter thats terrible which explain why when trump talked to republicans this week his opinion of the house bill had been negotiated. During a meeting with Senate Republicans the president kept his focus on healthcare. There plump flipflopped on the house reflame to obamacare calling it mean. The president calling the house bill a son of a bitch. Trevor damn, the bill went from unbelievable to a mean son of a bitch or in trump terms from an ivanka to an eric . Wow audience reacts and i dont say this often, but trump is right, the house bill is mean. If that bill became law, 23 Million People could become uninsured in america. Many people with preexisting conditions wont be protected and it would mandate colon cancer be renamed butt cancer. Its a mean bill, people. Because its so mean and unpopular Senate Republicans are left with two options, fix whats in the bill or hide it from everyone. Senate republican healthcare deliberations with the white houses blessing have all been conducted behind closed doors. No public hearings are scheduled but Mitch Mcconnell is no fool. He knows the second he puts the plan out theyre going to get chopped up in a thousand pieces. One g. O. P. Aide explaining why they wont release it to the public, we arent stupid. Trevor thats right, republican senators are so ashamed of the healthcare bill fair working on theyre putting it inside a porn magazine so no one will know what theyre reading. No, its not what you think, its porn. laughter the stories of republicans being shady and writing the bill in secret, these are up a fake news. For the truth, we need to go to the ancient tree who leads them, Senate Majority leader Mitch Mcconnell. Unfortunately, it will have to be a republicansonly exercise but were working hard to get there. Well let you see the bill when we finally release it. We know a lot about the subject. We know how complicated it is. Nobodyas hiding the ball here. Our goal here is to move forward quickly is that. Quickly. Trevor your goal is to move forward quickly . Shouldnt it to make a good healthcare system, doing it right not fast . You would think, of all people, Mitch Mcconnell would know about the tortoise and the hare. His cousin won that race. laughter but he is hiding the ball. No mistaken that. Heres why Mitch Mcconnells ball hiding is such a big deal. The Senate Healthcare bill has the potential to drastically change the lives of millions of americans and, like obamacare was, the process should be open so people can voice their needs and concerns. Right now even other senators cant help shape the bill because not even they know what it is. When you say that youre inviting us and i heard you, mr. Secretary, just say wed love your support. For what . We dont even know. We have no idea whats being proposed. Theres a group of guys in a back room somewhere that are making these decisions. Will there be a hearing . Huh . Invited to participate in this process and open to ideas and suggestions whispering bren. Well, i dont know that theres going to be another hearing but weve invited you the participate and were open to ideas no, no, thats not true, mr. Chairman. Trevor whos that . That dude just repeated exactly what that person told him to say at this point, why isnt she just the senator, the middle man . whispering but hold on, let me get this straight. This is slick here. Senate republicans are holding no hearings and arent letting democrats sea the bill at all but they still insist that they are letting the democrats participate. Thats what they say. You know what this is like . Like when your little brother wanted to play a video game to you so you gave him a controller that wasnt plugged in. Thats what this is like and your brother is, like, wait, if youre mario, who am i . Doesnt matter, youre winning. Yay if youre an older sibling, great memories. If youre an older sibling, yeah. If youre younger, thats when your issues started. Look, the truth is obamacare isnt perfect, right, through at least when Senate Democrats passed their initial bill in 2009, they worked on it for eleven months and held over a dozen open hearings. But even with all offthat, the republicans still complained that, with some things so big as reforming the American Healthcare system, the democrats were moving too fast and being too secret, and you will never guess which republican complained the most. This massive piece of legislation that seeks to restructure onesixth of our economy is being written behind closed doors without input from anyone in an effort to jam it past not only the senate but the American People before christmas. Trevor christmas, you know, the holiday where three ghosts show up in your bathroom and you ignore them. Baaaah laughter 2009, Mitch Mcconnell, he clearly understood the concept of open process with healthcare. This time its opposite because with trumpcare hes so afraid of backlash from voters it triggered his instinctive response. laughter power well be right back paypal lets you checkout with any of your payment types. Because sometimes debit makes sense. And other times credit makes sense. Paypalso when youre readyayment preferto check outance. You wont have to type in those digits. Our mountain is creating a more sustainable world. Its why we pioneered the recyclable can, and made our breweries landfillfree. Coors light, whatever your mountain, climb on. I believe in me too. I am the unicorn of your confidence since i came to know you baibe ive been telling you how sweet youre. Ive been telling you how good youre. Please tell me how i look. You look so good, fantastic man. Classic hersheys; plus cookie bits; plus caramel. Hersheys cookie layer crunch. A layered twist on a classic. The daily show while a lot of things clearly have changed under President Trump, turns out, when it comes the war, some things are still the same. Tonight, the u. S. Striking a terror target, an unmanned drone hitting alshabaab militants in somalia. The pentagon estimating eight militants killed. One of the al quaida groups main training and command posts destroyed. Trevor i know theyre terrorists but alshabaab sounds like an edgy jazz musician. Ladies and gentlemen, alshabaab kill americans, kill everybody. Trevor and theyre in afghanistan, syria, iraq, yemen pakistan and libya. You know you have a war problem when you have to count your wars on a second hand. For help keeping track of americas military actions we turn to hasan minhaj. Whats up, whats up ma imaginers . If theres one thing we know about donald trump its that he has a calm, measured approach to foreign policy. Going to bomb the whreep out of them. Bing bong bing bing bing. I blow up the pipes, every single inch. There would be nothing left. Oh, dang hold up, can we just bomb the bleep out of anyone . And also, are we . Youre hasan the record. This thing on. So many of our hasan the record fans have been commenting. Dear hasan. Trump loves the bomb stuff. Dont we have to declare war first . Chill with the labels, boo. This aint war, its the authorized use of military force, aumf. We just aumfin. Aumf. In 2001 after the 9 11 attacks th,Congress Gave president powes to go to war with any nations that participated in the attacks. Im talking about alnusra, al from home improvement. Basically the aumf lets the president order new military strikes without declaring war or asking congress. The aumf is so powerful that the last guy actually asked congress to limit it. Ultimately repeal the aumfs mandate. But amazingly congress rejected him. The president should have all the tools necessary to win. The president literally asked for checks and balance bus congress mutombod him and was like, no, no, no, you keep bombing. In the 16 years since 9 11 a lot changed. U. S. Wound down operations in afghanistan, Osama Bin Laden killed and thrown in the ocean and my cat got sick. But it didnt help. One thing hasnt changed since 9 11. The aumf powers. No expiration date. Like letting the president bomb places without having to declare war. Tinder for warfare, no commitment, baby that was like hundred years ago. Who are we aumfing today. Who are we bombing today . Nowadays the u. S. Is authorizing use of military force excuse me bombing the bleep out of seven countries, iraq, pakistan, afghanistan, somalia, yemen whats yemen . A hybrid bride between a yem and lemon . Crazy. We did 50 airstrikes there in march alone. You didnt know that but now you know that. The problem is Congress Gave the president broad powers because they thought he would never abuse them, but now the aumf son its third commanderinchief who happens to believe that the world is a mess. And i alone can fix it. Plus he gets a tiny chug each time he says the magic words radical islamic terrorism. So now there is no telling who we may end up bombing the bleep out of. Agriba . Whoa, its almost like giving the president virtually unlimited bombing powers was a bad idea. Which means it wasnt a good idea. Which makes it a bad idea. Go to hasan the record. Com to pick up your hasan the knapsack. The bag is cool but knowledge is lit. Next time we look at paul manafort. Man or fort . Think about it. Trevor hasan minhaj, everybody well be right back cheers and applause minions, were going back to villainy. So bad so good that im so bad. [ minions yelling ] give that back [ minions yelling ] despicable me 3. Rated pg. Honey bunches of oats. 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We choose not only to launch kfcs new zinger sandwich and a 5 dollar fill up. But to take it to space. Will it be easy . No. Will it be hard . Yes. Weve already covered that. But when we succeed. We will lick our fingers good space sandwich yeah try the zinger sandwich before it goes to space. You think its just five guys betwtry five hundred. Rim . Because for every guy you beat theres a hundred more out there, with your same fire. Working on your same moves. All trying to steal your glory. So if you want to be the one and only and not just one of many give that extra ounce. It might be just the one all the others dont. Gatorade. Rehydrate, replenish and refuel. cheers and applause trevor welcome back to the the daily show. My guest tonight is an actor and comedienne and cohost of the view and a legend, please welcome Woopi Goldberg cheers and applause whoo huhuh, huhuh. Trevor are you rolling off the edge . It only looks that way sometimes. laughter trevor welcome to the show. Thank you, its a pleasure to be here finally. Trevor are you kidding me . Its an honor to have you here. Well, its an honor to be here with you. Trevor in south africa, because of sara fina, i dont know how big the movie was in america but the day sara fina opened in the united states, the l. A. Riots happened. Trevor wow. So i think people were, like, well, were watching black people on tv burn bleep . I dont think we want to go into the movie house and watch this. So it came and went. Trevor and in south africa, that is one of the greatest, biggest movies of all time. Good, well, id like to be big somewhere, some time. Trevor please, Woopi Goldberg, kidding me . Egot winner, host of the view. Lets talk a little about the view. Why . Trevor why not . You know what i like about the view . I get to watch you hang out and be yourself all day. You have people with opposing views sitting around the table. How do you stop yourselves from hating each other when it comes to politics like the rest of america. The truth of the matter is you spend a lot of time with folks and you dont want to be disrespectful because you disagree. Just because you disagree with family doesnt mean you cant be civil. One of the things i loved about the view when i took the job was that, though outside people would say, oh, there goes those women arguing with each other, its, like, five women cant get along and its just bull. I love the idea that i can say the whole word but im, like, tentative. Trevor you can say bull bleep here. Well, it is bull bleep . Trevor there we go. Thats it. applause thats like its this thing that people do that keeps pushing women into some kind of weird stereotype. You know, every woman is different. Trevor when you look at political discourse in america now, i mean, i have been doing it from standup, you have been doing it in movies and tv. Youve had conversations on many different platforms. Do you feel a difference in the discourse now . Do you think that it is as bad as people say it is when you compare it to previous times . I dont mind who i dont agree with. I do mind a president that discounts us as a people, and it happens from time to time, but, you know, this is kind of hard to watch. You know, all of the craziness that youre hearing, you know, Gabby Giffords was a wonderful person in service and she was shot. Now we have these other Congress People she was a democrat. Weve had republicans shot now. So it seems to me that now that this has happened on both sides, somebody has to say, okay, something is really wrong here because the way to get people out of office is not to try to shoot them, its to vote them out. And if you dont have the balls to vote them out, thats your issue. But you have to you know, you have to look at it. This insanity discourse is not good because its not working. Trevor if you look at where you wish america could go. If you look at what your view would be for the future of the country, what would a dream scenario be . Not everyone will get together but what would you hope we would start to see . I want people to stop think about winning and thinking about how we win because, yeah, maybe we have to find things to do with coal, but i know im not going to burn coal in my house. Trevor right. Im not going to burn coal in my house, so we either have to find ways to retrain people and there used to be an office for that, but he shut it down. Trevor with this passion, do you think americans could ever see you running for office in any way . cheers and applause you know what . I have so many skeletons laughter i mean, there are so many laughter the closet is gigantic. Yeah. Trevor thank you so much for being on the show. Woopi goldberg, everybody, well be right back cheers and applause cheers and applause is that thank you so much thats our show. Stay tuned for the president show up next. Now here it is, your moment of zen. Breaking news a crowd at disneyland suddenly becomes the center of a hazmat swainchts heres what Anaheim Police tell us about that tonight. A flock of geese flying overhead blasted a crowd of visitors at the park. Exactly what you think, the birds dropped bird pap on the