laughter trevor remember that . Although i admit, i feel like i owe african dictators an apology. They were probably watching this election like, no, no, no, no, no. I might kill people, but to grab someone by the pussy, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no. I have decorum, huh . What kind of a man grabs it . You touch it, maybe rub it. Why you grab it . Maybe your hands are small, thats why you have to grab, huh . No, no, no, no. laughter the thought of donald trump as a dictator was funnier when him in power was hypothetical. Now america decides to shake things up and now possibly answers about the future may lie in the third world. Which bhai hard for many people, because usually you only look to the third world when you guilt your kids because they hate their christmas ments. Well, im sure so many some kids in africa would like this educational video game. I know politics may be dry. But looking at those leaders may be the only way to think about donald trump. Im speaking of south africa. The one you can easily find on the map. Africa, there. Cool. Up until a few years ago, our economy was humming, tourism was thriving and we, too, were celebrating our first black president. Remember that feeling . Basically, times were good. After 27 years, Nelson Mandela walked out a victor today. The 2010 fifa world cup will be organized in south africa. cheers and applause south africas Oscar Pistorius won the day. Oscar pistorius is the paraolympic champion. Trevor oh, man, so many good memories. I was in the crowd when the simba thing was happening. Yeah, we had to stop doing that because the next year he dropped the cub. Anyway, the point, is things were looking up for us as a nation. Unfortunately, in the last few years, things have taken a turn for the worse. The economy stalled. Unemployment is at record highs, government corruption is rampant and wasnt just Oscar Pistorius who disappointed us, last year simba was arrested for securities fraud. Yes, so why did this all happen . Ill tell you why. Because South African voters decided to shake things up. And, so, we elected a man by the name of jacob zumba, a charismatic antiestablishment president. I know you cant relate, but bear with me. You see, the inept selfserving way zuma has run his administration has turned south africa from a rising power to a troubled state. The reason im telling you this is when you look at zoo ma and trump, seems like theyre brothers from another mother. In souk, that countrys High Court Says the nations president jacob zumba should face more than 700 corruption and fraud charges. Donald trump has over 400 lawsuits against him right now. Zuma is building his reputation as man of the people. Donald trump is a man of the people. Jacob zumbas avid supporters can be found in rural areas and townships. His supporters are overwhelmingly rural area voters. He was charged and acquitted of rape. He has a rape status conference with the judge coming up. Jacob zumba was called the teflon politician. Ive said time and again, he is the teflon don. Trevor like donald trump appears to be teflon, literally, thats what hes spraying on his face. Strange. Whats more important is understanding what a leader like this could mean for america. For instance, lets look at what donald trump said just this week. The president elect says he plans to place his company in a blind trust to be run by his children, but the legal experts say the definition of a blind trust is that its run by people not in contact with the owner. Trevor yeah, its a bit weird we have to say this, but, donald, the point of a blind trust is that you cant see where your money is. It reassures the country that their president isnt making decisions for his own financial gain. If your kids, who you talk to every day, are running the trust, then its not blind. You see, its the difference between ray charles and jamie foxx playing ray charles. Right . applause one of them is blind. And one of them is faking it and getting rich in the process. We saw the same thing in sowfng. South africa. Jacob zumba started off, oh, my kids are going to run businesses. They do, and the the businesses have won billions in inflated government contracts which cost the taxpayers millions and billions of dollars and screwed the economy. So whats another one of Donald Trumps signature moves . If i win, i am going to instruct my attorney general to get a special prosecutor to look into your situation. Its just awfully good that someone with the temperament of donald trump is not in charge of the law in our country. Because you would be in jail. Trevor ooh. sniffs laughter were probably going to have to cut this, but im, like, can his dealer get to the white house . Whatever. Trump using prosecutors to intimidate opponents, get used to it. Called state capture. We didnt know that term in south africa till this year. Now its common. State capture, state capture, its become a normal thing because in south africa its a tactic zuma exploited again and again. When the finance minister of south africa called out on charges, he was investigated. I know our Law Enforcement agencies sound like gangs in a bootleg Westside Story but we like it. Makes us feel at home. Its not only great for intimidating your rivals, its also good because it distracts the people from the problems youre having. Im not saying donald trump will do that. But if he does, you guys owe me 20, all right . For everything that you look at, zuma and trump even feel the same way about the media. Even the media, they think they know me better. No, the people of this country know me better than they do. And the media are a mong the most dishonest people anywhere at anytime, but they cant stop us. Theyve tried to tell people how useless this man is. They write lies, they write false stories, they know theyre false, it makes no difference. Thats the problem of the media, and whoever else is behind the media. The election is being rigged by corrupt media pushing completely false allegations and outright lies trevor its exactly the same. Its almost like when they leave the house, melania is like, okay, donald, i do michelles ones, you take the affecten guys lines, okay . When youre the head of the government and youre right get away with bleep , free press is not your friend. The same reason president zuma has been trying to get the power to censor the press or as donald trump would say. Well open up the libel laws so that when the New York Times writes a hit piece which is a disgrace we can sue them. So well open up the libel laws folks and well have people sue you like youve never been sued before cheering trevor yeah, were all getting the money yeah now, again, im not saying trump is definitely going to do that, but if its true, im not going to be able to say that later on, so i may as well say it now. Luckily, zuma hasnt been able to muzzle the press in south africa because he doesnt have control of south africas court system. That is a big hindrance to him. But a hindrance el trumpo may not have to face. Hes going to be filling the lower courts. There are dozens of District Court vacancies, federal court of appeals vacancies and these are the courts that actually decide the vast majority of the litigation in the United States. At least one Supreme Court justice maybe as many as four. Trump will potentially shape the court for a generation. Trevor now, look, there are many differences and similarities, and im not saying its going to be the same here as it is in a thirdworld country. Of course not. Im saying, it could be much worse. Well be right back. cheers and applause cheers trevor welcome back to the daily show. We have been talking about how, under donald trump, america could become more like certain countries in the part of the world im from. But in some ways, its not really a fair comparison because the truth is americas systems of government is highly advanced. In fact, while america may be become morgue like africa, i wouldnt be surprised if avenge is trying to become more like you. Gentlemen, gentlemen, africa has a problem with brandy and we need to branding and we need to solve it. For example, if you give a politician money and in exchange he gives you a favor, what do you call it . Bribery. Trevor no it is called loving. Bribery is bad, low beam is good. Say again. Low beam, low beam. With passion. Low beam. Teacher, its like a hotel lobby. Sorry, teacher, i did not have time to do my homework. I was busy rigging an election. You dont say rigging, we call it gerrymandering. Rigging bad, gerrymandering good. Remember, americans like to have fun when they are being corrupt. Thats why they have these words, gerrymander, lobbying. Why would the u. S. Population sit by and say nothing about this . The American People are very busy. Have you heard of Caitlyn Jenner where the American People are trying to figure out if Caitlyn Jenner needs to use a bathroom or not. Class dismissed. Remember, theres a test tomorrow. I dont want t to read the answers. That was a good class. I was hoping i can lobby you to give me an a for tomorrows test. Your commitment to education is noted. laughter applause trevor well be right back. Library break shhhhhhhh. Have a break, have a kit kat trevor welcome back to the daily show. My guests tonight are the hosts of desus and mero on viceland. We are leaving the United States after this donald Trump Victory and its a Groundswell Movement people are getting behind it. California, you need america. Californias like, huhuh i dont need you, i got my own. Im independent, i got my own stuff. Let me tell you something mix economy is more popular than france. So you can go ahead with your bleep . And i got more People Living inside me an poland. Trevor welcome desus nice and the kid mero cheers and applause all right welcome to the show, gentlemen. Thank you for having us. Very large tv studio. Trevor you guys dont have this . I mean, weve got some stuff on this. Nothing like this. Trevor do you have an audience . No. Because thats like metal detectors and security. Our budget is not that high. Trevor why are you worried . The first thing you go to, metal detectors . Were from the bronx. Theyre essential in the bronx. Trevor youre from south africa youre from south africa, very similar. Trevor not exactly. They both carry guns, though. You came from the bronx. Ive loved following your story. I first came across you on twitter, then listened to fahd wast, you have a cult following that has grown with you. And what i love is how people describe the two of you fresh, unapologetic. Raw. Urban, in your face, graphic trevor are they just trying to say black . They are laughter you can say urban. Trevor feels like theyre trying to say black. You guys are so black trevor you cant say that. You have to say unapologetic. Trevor your relationship on your journey is you came up from the bronx. Not often a story where you hear the artists are in control of what theyre doing. Even the name desus. What on earth is desus nice, whats that name . Thats a nickname i got from the neighborhood because i make miracles happen. I dont know, my cousin was high when he made it up. So i ran with it. When you go to my neighborhood, you say, whos desus, they wont know me from tv. Its whos the bald guy. Trevor and youre mero. I come from a household where the men made the decisions and they wanted to call me mero and my mom didnt but they called me that. Then my mom named me romero, but its hard to spell, so i replaced it with mero. Trevor when the police are coming up if only he had a longer name, we would have caught him trevor and what youre doing is very different. One of the purposes of your shows is you feel like youre building a movement. Whoa, you will get us on some watch list now. I just came for the free booze. laughter no, i feel so many show, like your show, you have a talk show at night, you got the audience and everything, yo. We have a more destruct you have more deconstructed, looser, and can say why woul wild thing. Trevor you are going to be alt left. I dont want to be alt. Can i be regular . Alt middle . Apologetic. You said it before, we literally get to dictate what goes on the show. Clearly we dont bang with trump because were children of minorities so thats not our guy for all the reasons you have stated to eloquently in the past 25 minutes. Trevor if someone had never seen your show and you wanted them to watch, what would you say to them . Do you like hanging out with your friends and getting really high and talking about stuff in thats exactly what its like. Trevor desu desus and mero n be seen on the viceland. Chee Heineken has been family owned since 1873. They know about Family Tradition. My favorite Family Tradition . Exchanging gifts. It allows me to showcase my tremendous range as an actor. What could this be . Aww you shouldnt have i love it i actually brought these myself. Trevor thats our show for tonight. Thank you so much for tuning in. Now here it is. Your moment of zen. Do we like the media . No do we hate the immediatey . Yes okay. Now, i dont hate anybody. I love the media. Theyre wonderful. Ral chris its 29 minutes until midnight when the day resets and we announce a winner. But were all warns here. Im chris hardwick. So 2016 has been described by meteorologists as a class 5. bleep show. So want to take a break from the bad news of the world, courtesy worldwide web . Well, lets do it. Because honestly you guys we have been we have been neck deep in crap news this entire year between terrorism and zika and the election virus and losing people, pop culture icons that we love what the bleep , 2016 what the serious bleep . So 2016 has definitely been the year of no chill. So we decided that we were going to give you a mental break from all that stuff tonight. The entire show is an escapepod for you emotionally. Lets start with my sweater. I feel better surrounded by fuzzy wuzzy bears, all right . It covers up by booboos. I feel better when i get stressed out and go, what am i going to do . Sp al shows up and goes, no problem, chris. No problem so tonight, everything were doing is cuter than a bugs ear, and a bugs ear is pretty bleep cute. Welcome to has. Here we are. Or cat midnight, if you want. All right. One of the biggest stories of the election was wikileaks, the Hacking Organization led by Julian Assange, a. K. A. Mens rights sephiroth, who is possibly aided by russia and whose revelations may have swung the election. But who gives a bleep about any of that anymore his cat wears a tie oh, my god hes stuck in that embassy all these years. Thats probably his best friend and probable lover. We dont know. Who would you rather bleep . A human or a cat . Its a tie. I know. Ha i kill me comedians, Julian Assange has spilled a lot of government secrets. Whats a secret he might learn from his cat . Randy . Im sorry, i forknot to mention, we changed the buzzers today. Garfield doesnt hate mondays. He hates mormons. Its a typo. Sara schaefer. Three dogs died in boneghazi. Chris points. Flula. A cat ladys arent actually lonely. They are secretly super hot intercourse machines. Chris all right, points. Skews me. Breaking news. Reports coming in that theres a dog no, not a dog, a puppy that is threatening to kill bystand wers cuteness. We have to check in on this going live to what appears to be someones bathroom floor. Jack, take us there, please. Oh, the humanity. What a truly adorable moment. Well bring you live, realtime updates as they come on, on tub watch 2016. Remember you heard it here first on midnight. The first and only network brave us to bring you tub watch. Please stay with us and dont paws your dvrs. Now back to our regularly scheduled program. Next, some pigs. One of the stories captivating the nation tonight two fun guinea pig buddies are sharing a healthy snack. We take you to the twitter video, already in progress. Audience oh applause comedians, qur question about this video whats the name of