Come on up here, everybody all were a little bit country were a little bit rock n roll we can be a nation that believes in war. And still tells the world that we dont. All let the flag for hypocrisy fly high from every pole cause were a little bit country and were a little bit rock n roll well, good night, everybody. It sure has been great bringing you 100 episodes. We wanna thank our guests, the prowar people. [applause] and the antiwar people. What the hell are they doing now . I dont know. All for the war, against the war who cares . 100 episodes [fireworks crackling] i hate this town. I really, really do. Captioning by kristi at captionmax www. Captionmax. Com captioning sponsored by Comedy Central from Comedy Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with trevor noah. cheers and applause trevor welcome to the daily show. My name is trevor noah. My guest tonight, he used to be a drug dealer, then he became a cop, and now hes written a book about it, retired n. Y. P. D. Inspector, cory pegues, will be here to join us. First, lets talk about brazil, a land where thousands of years ago, jesus christ was cursed by medusa and now waits for true loves kiss to awaken him. Read your bibles, guys. Its a crazy, crazy book. In the last couple of weeks, brazils government has gone through some dramatic changes. Brazil has seen their share of scandal, but this is just too much. A huge government shakeup. Tonight, it is official, embattled president Dilma Rousseff will face an impeachment trial. Brazillians woke up to a new president on friday. Michael temer is now in charge. He is now the acting president. Trevor im sorry, woke up to a new president. How does that happen . Things are not going well for your country when every morning you have to be like, whos president today . The only people who should wake up to a new president are people in a coma. Thats it. No one else should. Like captain america can wake up to a new president. Not the the rest of us. So its beenab unbelievable two weeks in brazil. Earlier this month, brazils president , who is also apparently some sort of Space Commander judging by that picture, was to be impeesmed for allegedly manipulating some budget numbers. Now the whole country is in turmoil. A new intertim government comes in, and yesterday, someone released a secret recording, showing that the people in the interim government conspired to impeach the old president in order to hide their own muchworse corruption. And we, we at the daily show managed to get that secret recording. Thats not the secret recording. laughter or it is, but you cant tell the difference in brazil. Its always a carnival. All of this bleep is hitting the fan. And right now, it couldnt abe worse time. The olympics in brazil are less than three months away. The big question is will brazil be ready to host it . Trevor will brazil be ready to host it . Brazils government is in chaos. In fact, in the street, theres rumors it might even have been a military coup, and now, just like that, they have to pivot to the olympics. All of a sudden, people are like, it seems every Single Person in our government is a backstabbing criminal. Anyway, long jump laughter its crazy. The whole world is getting ready to go to brazil, and theyre just going to carry on like everything is normal. Its like your friend inviting you over while hes in a huge fight with his parents. And youre like, hey, is this a good time . Yeah, come on in, come on in. Shut up, ma i hate you you want to play mario cart i wish i was never born. White people. applause now, if you thought brazils government looks bleep right now, you clearly havent seen where the actual events are taking place. Athletes could be swimming and boating in waters that are highly contaminated, polluted by sewage, viruses, and fecal matter. More than half the water that flows spot bay is actually sewage. Trevor more than half the water is actually sewage . Can we just all agree that if your water is more than half sewage, its not water. Its bleep , with some water in it. Those are not water sports. Those are turd sports north to be cob fused with actual turd sports, like lacrosse. Its a very different thing, very different thing. laughter now, maybe youre thinking, hey, trevor, big deal. Who cares about a little sewage . To which i say are you no longer invited to my monthly potluck. It is not a little sewage, my friend. It is an aweinspiring amount of crap. We searched for viruses specifically linked to human sewage. Those numbers that we found are off the charts, numbers they have never seen anywhere else. Based on our data, there is a 99 chance that athletes will be infected by one of these viruses if they ingest three teaspoons of water. Trevor hey, science guy, just tell the people not to drink the poop water. laughter why are you being so specific three tea spoons of water. You think somebody out there is going, so, two tea sproons fine . Mmm two tea spoons mmm. Ah, no ah three, no. No. applause effectlicious. The political chaos and the bleep water arent even its biggest problem right now. The country has also become the center of the south american zika virus outbreak. Brazil zika crisis was caused by a single infected traveler coming to the americas. Trevor wow. That sucks for brazil. Theyve got zika on top of everything else. And the worst part is they got it from just one traveler . No one knows who brought zika into brazil. Although, do you think it might have been this guy . laughter because if you do, thats racial profiling. laughter yeah. Now, mosquitos spreading zika virus is a problem for brazillians but at least they have generations of samba training to help them swat the insects away. So it helps. The problem is theres another way that you can catch zika. Zika can be spread through sexual contact. Australia plans to issue superstrength condoms to all its olympians in the help it will help stop the spread of zika. Trevor super strength condoms . Shouldnt you always be using super strength condoms . What do australians normally use, halfstrength condoms. What are they living on the edge . You dont want to eliminate all the risk, do you . Come on, get my shrimp closer to the barbie. Thats not even a hine they say. It just works for the joke. Zika is not just a problem for south america. Its a problem for real america because you know the u. S. Cant stay away from the olympics, people, because it gives america both a chance to win and a chance to go on vacation. And americans love vacations. Thats the reason why the u. S. Has already brought back 544 travelrelated cases of zika back home. So now zika is slowly becoming an american problem. And thats yet white house has asked congress to alidate kate 1. 9 billion to help fight zika and keep it from spreading any further. Its the kind of request only a fool would deny. Congress has not passed the 1. 9 million bl in emergency funding to prevent zika from spreading that the white house has requested. House republicans are arguing there is plenty of money left over from the battle against the ebola virus. Trevor are you bleep me ebola money is for ebola. If you move the ebola money to zika, ebola might come back. If youre in a life boat and youre cold you dont set the life boat to keep warm. I think its cheer what needs to happen here, people brazil has given us so much in the world, and its time for the world to pay them back. I mean, not with money because that bleep is ours. But in august, the world is sending the most elite, physically fit human beings to brazil. While theyre there, why dont they use their skill to help brazil fix their problems. Badminton players, swat the mosquitos. And olympic rowers, scoop all the poop out of the water. And remember, every teaspoon counts . Ch scoop away well be right back. Scoop 53 scoop 53 ap hey there, can i help you with anything . Hey siri, whats at ts latest offer . Oh, i dont think that siri can. Right now, switch to at t for an iphone and get one free. Wow, is that right . Yeah, its basically. Yes. That is the current offer from at t. Okay siri, you dont know everything. Well, i know you asked me to call you the at t hostess with the mostest. Okay, shut her down. Turn it off. Right now, buy an iphone and get another one free when you add a second line. A superior hard apple cider inspired by the cider the pioneers drank. And they traveled this country. On foot. Smith forge. Hard cider the way its sposed to taste. Evil weeds are always lurking. New scotts turf builder kills the weeds you see and the ones you dont with its weed Grip Technology and feeds your grass for a thicker lawn too. New scotts turf builder weed and feed. Go to participating retailers for 10 off. Intromercedesbenz ccoupe, redesigned new scotts turf builder weed and feed. With its athletic prowess and sleek new body. It doesnt just raise the bar. It completely crushes it. The allnew cclass coupe. Mercedesbenz. The best or nothing. Maybe we can live in a house like that yeah yeah . Alright sfx sound of cars crashing. Why do we enforce seat belt laws . Because in real life, you dont get a second chance. Thefor instance, looking ates things is an activity. We make uplack in nature service. E, cheers and applause trevor welcome back to the daily show. So, i just looked, and donald trump is still the Presumptive Republican nominee. I just feel like we need to check that every day to make sure its still real. But its true, he is, which means its time for trump to make the traditional pivot to the general election, to become a more nuanced, evenkeeled president ialseeming candidate, and leslike a sixfoot pile of angry carrot cake vomit. Or at least, we all thought it was time. Donald trump, the pumpive republican nominee for president , is dredging up a false conspiracy theor about want death of a close friend of bill and hillary clinton. Trump told the Washington Post the 1993 death of Clinton Family confidant vince foster was very fishy. To be clear, the notion that this was a murder is a fiction born of delusion and untethered to reality. To say otherwise is ridiculous and, frankly, shameful. Trevor thank you, jake tapper. Wow. That was powerful. The only reason hes a newsman, so he couldnt just be like bleep but he said that pret much. He is so riled up right now and he has every right to be. Although, jake tapper, you probably want to pace yourself. Yes, trump just accused hillary of murder, but its still only may. By november trump will be claiming she was the asteroid that wiped out the dinosaurs. You have to pace yourself. laughter now, in case youre not familiar with the story, vince foster was a you who aide who killed himself in 1993, but the conspiracy theorists from the entertains swampiest corners insist he was killed by the clintons for some reason, this despite five official investigations which said it was definitely a suicide, including one by ken starr, a guy so determined to get the clintons he managed to track down one of bills old jizz stains. Thats how determined he was. So im pretty sure, the clintons, if they had murdered someone, ken starr would have told us about it. But as odd as it is for a president ial nom tee nee to love such an accusation, it makes sense for donald trump. It is how he launched his political career. Trump is ramping up the rhetoric calling into question president obamas birth certificate. Check out the internet. Many people say it is not real, okay, that its a forgery. He may have one, but theres something on that it may be religion, maybe it says hes a muslim. There were contemporaneous reports that coopted you those are the facts. George, theyve coopted you. Who is they . Obviously, obama and his mennions. laughter trevor this guy is such an ass. I mean, first of all, thats like the worst jedi mine trick ever they corrupted you, they corrupted you. Secondly, lets acknowledge that obama and his min yons would be an amazing movie. It really would. laughter cheers and applause now, remember, remember, trump didnt just endorse other peoples birther theories. He claimed to have found brand new information from his own investigation. You have people now down there searching i mean, in hawaii. Absolutely, and they cannot believe what theyre finding. He said, they cannot believe what theyre finding. See what happens. Its none of your business right now upon were going to see what happens . Have they found anything . Were gog see what happens. What have they done . We are going to see what happens. When . George, next question, george. Trevor wow. Even people in porn are like, what a giant dick. Now, im sure there are lots of people out there who have, like, one crazy groundless false conspiracy that they believe in. Maybe even two. But donald trump is special because trump believes in all of them. Trump has already moved on to a new issue, questioning whether president obamas grades in college were good enough to get into harvard law school. I dont know why he doesnt release his records. Trump speculated about a tabloid rumor linking cruzs father to j. F. K. s assassination. What was he dwoog lee harveyg with lee harvey oswald, shortly before the death, before the shooting. He warned of syrian immigrants using cell phones with isis flags will stage another 911. Who is paying for those cell phones . Who are they calling . Donald trump said the president has some kind of secret plan with saudi arabia to lower prices until the election. I think saudi arabia is doing obama a big, fat, favor. I think he asked for that favor. Donald trump expressed skepticism about how Justice Scalia died. I say they found a pillow on his face which is an unusual place to find a pillow. The beautiful child went to have the vaccine, came back and now is autistic. laughter trevor that could be the next president . I dont get it. People say voters choose the person theyd like to have a beer with, but if this guy sat next to you in a bar, you would be like, you know what . I really have to go home right now. And theyd be like, wait, i havent even told you how the free maceons faked the moon landing. People, donald trump is a man who divorces himself from the truth so much he makes it sign a prenup. America is basically taking the weirdest, most conspiratorial nut job on the message board and saying give that guy the c. I. A. , f. B. I. , and the worlds most powerful military. Lets just see what happens. Can you hear me . Trevor is that roy wood, jr. . Trevor, trevor, hey, hey. I dont have a lot of time, man, but youre missing the bigger picture. The key to all of this is not trump. Its hillary. The president ial candidates talking candidly about opening up the governments files on u. F. O. S. I have sailed i want to opponent files as much as we can. But there are enough stories out there that i dont think everybody is just sitting, you know, in their kitchen making them up. You see . Hillary promised to tell us the truth about area 51. You know about area 51, right . I think in africa you all call it district nine. Trevor thats a totally different roy what, is this all about . Just follow me for a second when hillary releases those files, everyone will know donald trump is an alien thats not spray tan. Hes dmoferred that mars dirt. Trevor oh, come oroy. You mean like an outer space alien. I worked it all out. Trevor, donald trump is an alien scout. Thats why hes got us tearing ourselves apart to soften us up for the invasion. Trevor well, i guess that explains why hes such an asshole. Or maybe, maybe his tweets are secret messages to the mothership, man. Those arent typos. Thats how you spell bleep alien. Trevor oh, my word. Or, or, or, maybe, maybe hes a narcissistic demagogue who shamelessly exploits longdebunked conspiracies to distract from the emptiness of his policies and ideas cheers and applause trevor come on, roy that ones pretty farfetched. I think its the invasion thing. I think its the invasion thing. Oh, no, theyre here theyre coming for me trevor who is it, roy, the n. S. A. . No, my ubers out front. I gotta get those five stars. Trevor well be right back. Get out there, roy get out there, roy cheers and applause what aremaking a cake ht now . Ayla reminds me of like a master chef and emiana reminds me of like a monster chef. Uh oh. I dont see cake, i just see mess. Its like awful. It feels like i am not actually cleaning it up whats that make mommy do . doorbell whats that . Swiffer wetjet. So much stuff coming up. This is amazing woah. Wow. Now i feel more like making a mess is part of growing up. Stop cleaning. Start swiffering. Whats it say . Is it the cure for malaria . Has the war ended . A prince wants to give us 20 million dollars, he just needs our Social Security numbers. Were gonna be rich horses for everyone the first spam was sent by telegraph in 1864. Huh. Put some flavor in your break. Make time for snapple pilot talking to tower on radio once you get out here. Theres just one direction. Forward. One time now. And theres just one sound. You and us. Together. Telling the world. Were coming for you. There are those who evolved. To control energy, teleport, and even fly. Still others evolved so much. They dont even need to wear pants. With hanes xtemp technology, youll stay cool under pressure. Even when saving the world from apocalypse. Wait. What now . Hanes xtemp technology. Because when youre cool, youre comfortable. Xmen apocalypse in theaters may 27 cheers and applause trevor welcome back. My guest tonight is a retired n. Y. P. D. Deputy inspector and author whose new book is called once a cop. Please welcome cory pegues. Welcome to the show, sir. Thanks for having me. Trevor thank you for being here upon you have written quite an interesting book and you have lived an even more interesting life. You were a crack dealer and a member of a gang and then you went on to work as a Police Officer for the n. Y. P. D. Why didnt you just go into rap . Were your rhymes not good enough . Well, its funny you say that because i write in the book, i tried to rap. It only lasted for one day. I was horrible. Trevor you were that bad . I was that bad. Trevor you were so bad you upon like, i need to become a Police Officer . Yeah. Trevor lets talk through the story. It really is center tring because you were in a gang, upper on the streets. You were committing crimes. You went on to become a Police Officer, and what you realize in the book is nobody knew that you were a gangster because you had never been caught. Right. I was arrested one time. And i admitted that, you know, during the investigation. But i wasnt convicted of the crime. Trevor yes. And that was the reason you could become a Police Officer. Yes. Trevor now, everyone has the argument that criminals are criminals for life. A lot of the time you cant rehabilitate people. You went on to become a Police Officer who was actually very successful in catching criminals because you thought like one. Yes. Well, i bucked the trend. I mean, you know, people want to box people in to what they are when theyre young, and they dont give people time for change. I mean, you know, if you read the book, its in three parts hustler, cop, executive. If you stop at the first part of the book and dont read anything else, youre going to see this guy is dead or in jail. But if you go on, you will see a phenomenal transformation of life. Trevor obviously, coming out and telling the stories you told in this book, you pointed out stories of corruption pup pointed out stories of, you know, systemic racism within the police force itself. With you coming out and saying these things now, you know america has a big problem with policing and the way the public perceiving. When you write a book like, this some of the stories you talk about make you wonder how yand how is something not happening from the inside. Police officers, if they are being spat on, is there no way to deal with this . Is there no way to deal with police who may be agitated, people who are pulling out their guns unnecessarily . You were in a very high position. How do you see us moving forward . How do you see the community moving to a place where the police are no longer seen as a separate ententity, where they are protectin protecting and se. 90 of Police Officers are good cops. Its the 5 or 10 we have to really deal with. Most cops just come to work and do their job every day and any home. Leadership starts at the topdown, and policing is a paramilitary organization. Im the boss, i tell you to move, thats what you do. If the leaders are allowing the cop i was commander of the one of the most violent precincts in new york. I would address the cops and say when you go out into my community, you make sure you treat when you said my, the cops looked at me and said hes taking ownership. When you have kids, and you say dont eat no cookies and one eats a keek what, are you going to do . Trevor break their jaw. Am i doing it right . laughter so if a cop slaps somebody, you know, we always want to punish the cop after a shoot, kill an unarmed person. What happens when you do the investigation . Oh, yeah, 15 complaint. He did this, he did that. So when they slap somebody, you punish them. Trevor stepping in early and doing something about it. Exactly. Doing stuff early. Trevor if you were to reply to people who are critics, some of them police, who say its easy for you to say these things now because youre out. Youre writing a book. Youre telling all these stories. And it feels like youre not on the side of the police anymore. How do you reply to that criticism . When i talk about policing, im talking about bad cops, if youre a good cop and doing your job every day, my criticism is not directed towards you. Im talking about the 10 . Its not a lot. The entire n. Y. P. D. Is not bad. The entire Baltimore PoliceDepartment Eye dont know if we can say it about chicago with all that stuff going on but most of these police departments, 95 of these cops are doing a good job. But the leadership has tow now make sure theyre taking care of the role of Police Officers and disciplining them. Because if you start firing them or giving them some heavy sentences or 30 Vacation Days or taking them off patrol and stuff like that, it resonates. Trevor its a really fascinating book. It comes with a lot of controversy which makes for a great story. Thank you very much for joining us. Thank you for having me. Trevor once a cop, available now. Cory pegues, everybody. Well be right back. cheers and applause this is smith forge. A superior hard apple cider inspired by the cider our forefathers drank. And they built this country with their bare hands. Smith forge. Hard cider the way its sposed to taste. They have smart online tools, which saves money. They settle claims quickly, which saves money. They drive an all hybrid claims fleet, which saves money. They were born online and built to save money. Thats auto and Home Insurance for the modern world. Esurance. An allstate company. Click or call. Trevor thats our show for tonight. Thank you for tuning in. Joan us tomorrow night a