Courts cannot. The same way your mom settles the disputes your dad cannot or that your other mom cannot, because thats okay now, thanks to the Supreme Court. Now, in a court that is often divided, having one extra vote can make all the difference, meaning just one person can be responsible for hugely significant changes in the law and, very often, in the last 30 years, that person was Justice Antonin Scalia who passed away ten days ago. Now, his vote was the reason america can no longer regulate our Campaign Finance spending and the reason minority Voting Rights are vulnerable and the reason george w. Bush became president which makes scalia sound like a dick but on the other hand his rules prevented the government from conducting ifn vasive home searches and sensorring video games. So if you like to play grand theft auto, thanks Justice Scalia or if you want to commit it, thank Justice Scalia. Hes a good all around guy. Its a powerful position. Now there is an opening. As vague coons tuition is on so many things, its Crystal Clear on whats supposed to happen now. The president has to nominate a justice and the senate has to consider approving them and then if they get confirmed, the rest of the justices, they have to haze the new person. Its a system of checks and balances and underwear up a flag pole like the Founding Fathers intended. laughter president obama said he would nominate someone as fast as he could. The only thing there is there is a senatesized speed bump. Senate republicans vowed to block any nomination. Were not bringing this nominee out this year. It is today the American People who are best positioned to help make this important decision. Usually, you never nominate anybody during the last year of apt. I think this is a matter of policy that during a lame duck period we should not be confirming a Supreme Court nomination. mocking trevor you will have to forgive ted cruz. He sufferers from mental condition called being a liar. applause yeah, thats whats going on there because, i mean, he says that, but the lame duck period is the part where a president has just gone through an election. Its after the election. When were just waiting to inaugurate this next commander commanderinchief. This president is not a lame duck at all. Hes a perfect duck. Like daisy duck. laughter yeah, i mean, like, shes got the bow and the feathers and the damn feet, i dont know how they fit, but they do in the thing, and she can do whatever she wants. laughter until the election. Until the election. And then shes a lame duck. The point, is these republican senators are totally full of b. S. Because not that long ago when there was a republican president making judicial nominations, they were sing ago different tune. We cannot hijack the president s power to appoint justs, it upsets the balance. The constitution of the United States is a at stake. Article 2, section 2 clearly provides the president and the president alone nominates judges. Trevor yeah. Thank you man with turkey neck. Youve shown that this is not about the constitution, but rather just about getting what you want for your party. Luckily luckily, the democrats know whats up. The American People dont like this obstructionism. When you go right off the bat and say i dont care who he nominates, i am going too pows him, thats not going to fly. There is no unwritten law that says it can only be done on off years. Im amused when i hear people who claim to be strict interpreters of the constitution suddenly reading into it a whole series of provisions that are not there. Trevor you know what i love about president obama, his burns are so classy. Like, he disses the bleep out of the republicans, but hes doing it so smoothly. He just has that swag about him i find it amusing that, uh, your mother is so overweight, that, uh, i had to order the, uh, post master general to issue her, uh, own zip code. applause hes just smooth and you see, the truth, is republicans, the game is up. You love giving speeches and making ads about americas greatest document, how no one loves the constitution noorn you, but its all sanctimonious bull bleep . You just want to have things your way. Oh, obama needs to wait. Oh, its an election year. Oh, you like to throw around the term lame ducks . Well, guess what, republicans, yall are a bunch of lame bleep . applause trevor sorry, the mic was supposed to drop off. Why is the mic not oh, man, is there another side to this story . Democrats have done this plenty of times before. I will recommend to my colleagues that we should not confirm any bush nominee to the Supreme Court except in extraordinary circumstances. Sam alito being nominated by george w. Bush in 2006, barack obama was in the senate, voted to phil buster the nomination, he didnt even want to vote on it trevor i should have known. Thanks for nothing, democrats. For more we go to senior political analyst Jordan Klepper in washington. Jordan klepper, everybody cheers and applause jordan, please help us. Whats going on here . Seems like everyone is just saying whatever it takes to get their way even when its totally inconsistent. Look on the bright side, theyre lying. Trevor do you know what bright means, jordan . Stay with me on these. These politicians feel ashamed to tell truth of what theyre actually doing so instead theyre covering their partisan intentions and highminded rhetoric and principals, which is disgusting, but it shows they at least know what noble principles are. Trevor so they have a moral compass but theyre not using it . Yeah, but they have one. Its not completely lost. Its stuck in a junk drawer with old rubber bands and your exgirlfriends diaphragm. Trevor why would you keep your exgirgirlfriends diaphra . Because in case she needs it back. She has another set of twins on facebook. We get it, good, youre happy trevor whos good . Its how congress works. Its something we learned when we were young, grew up playing the congress, the home game. Trevor what . You can experience the u. S. Bicamera legislature in your own home with congress, the home game. Awesome. Cant wait to play. You go first. No, im not playing. What . Move the country forward, vote on important issues. You just said you couldnt wait to play. Yep. So can i go first . You can go to hell. With hundreds of pages of procedural rules, the only limit is your imagination. It says here. Confirm nomination, even amend the constitution all you have to do is play the game please move your hand. My hand has a right to be there. Fine. You roll the dice. Why did you do that . Youre not winning. Neither are you. But neither are you. Yeah, but neither are you screaming you can do Anything Congress can do. Okay. Maybe we can try again tomorrow. Im going on vacation for a month. screaming congress, the home game, from the makers of syria, the multiplayer strategy game where everyone blast oh trevor thank you, Jordan Klepper. Well be right back c im savin you five hundred coming soon from progressive, its savin u, the new hit single from the dizzcounts. Cash money the Biggest Discount and understand. The dizzcounts. Safe driver, paperless, paidinfull, multicar and joey fatone. Savin you five hundred im savin you five hundred we have autotune, right . Oh, yeah. Thats a hit all yeah i got minds to twist and alrivalues to warp. His. Mr. Tyler, your skittles portrait. That is e to the z oh twiddly deesgusting you havent heard me sing diddlyding yet. Dream on higher. Dream on i think a little higher dreammmm onnnnnnnn dreammm onnnn rock the rainbow. Taste the rainbow. Why are you so tired . Ts. Ahh, the after lunch food coma. Weve all been there. You had planned on ordering the salad, but the pasta and fries looked so good. Now, youre trying to find a place to catch a few zzzs. Without the boss catching you. Next time, grab a great tasting 5hour energy® shot. Itll help you stay alert and productive. No matter whats on the menu. Now is the time for 5hour energy®. Okayits chewy. His . Really icy. Wooh. Thats intense it just hits you. Its gum. No. Its totally a mint its disappearing as i am chewing it. Where did it go . Its not a gum. Not a mint. Its a breakthrough in cool. Ice breakers cool blasts. cheers and applause trevor welcome back to the show there are many problems in the world, so its nice when we get a chance to make a difference here on the daily show. As Jessica Williams does in this very special report. Jessica ive done a lot of field pieces over the years and met a lot of wonderful people. So when i found out a former interview eee was in trouble i found out who was in need. Not this guy reverend James David Manning is known for being the controversial pass for for at World Missionary in haroldum and for posting signs like this outside his church. We met with him once in 2009. Obama is indeed the next hitler. Jessica again in 2015 when he told thus little gem that has stuck with me ever since. I think this starbucks recognized the flavor of their lattes that they are using semen to make that ltte even more flavorful. Jessica you think theyre using semen to flavor their latte . I sat down with dr. Manning to find out what the hell is going on now. The city of new york, the deblasio administration, in particular, is trying to foreclose on our property over a damn water bill. Jessica have you been paying your water bill . Were tax exempt. Were a church. Churches do not pay water bills or any other kind of tax for that matter. Jessica thats bullship. After a long legal battle, the court rules the church was not eligible tore the exemption so that and a long list of other offensens against the church prompted their closing. The sodomites lost the campaign to silence my voice in this community. Jessica who are these sodomites . Many have moved from other parts of the city and country and moved up here to this particular community. Going up town to harlem. Going to let my hair down in harlem. Jessica im going to harlem. And have a good time. Jessica and have a good old time. I have to say this, i dont know in the audience can handle it. Jessica what do you have to say . A lot came looking for black meat. Jessica what . Black meat. Jessica what is black meat . Sex with black men. Jessica oh, my god. Why do you say stuff like this . Well, i think its a pretty common i think jungle fever could be one of the terms. You might accept that, would you . Anything is better than black meat. Okay, thats it, jungle fever jessica i had one more question. Does starbucks have anything to do with this . You mean the fact starbucks put seemnan their lattes . I have been thinking about this the last time you talked, the fact that you think starbucks puts semen in their lattes. How . How do they get vanilla into lattes . How do they do that . Jessica they pump vanilla in there. There you go. Jessica is that how it goes . I would think. Jessica where is starbucks getting all this semen from . Because thats massive operation. I mean, im not a biologist or a chemist. Jessica thats true, you are not a biologist, you are not a chemist. Okay i said i was going to help and i am. So i met with the man who wants to buy the property, carlos, but turns out hes not exactly planning to put up highrise condos. Instead, hes doing this i run a program for homeless lgbt youth, kids who have been thrown out of their homes. What i would like to do is fill the building with young people who are currently sleeping in the streets. Jessica whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Let me just wrap my head around this right now. You want to kick out a church that is very homophobic and put in young lgbt youth . Its three blocks away from our dropin center. It would be a Perfect Place for our young people to live. Jessica whaaaaaaaaaaaat applause ha thats amazing. That is great. But the reverend isnt concerned the largest lgbt youth center in the country wants to move in because hes carefully analyzed the Legal Proceedings and hes come to this logical conclusion. Before this church is foreclosed on, sodo sodomites wl carry babies in their testicles for nine months and then jess at a time them out of their assholes before this church is closed. If its possible for that to happen, its possible for this church to be foreclosed. Jessica okay so you are saying people will have butt babies before this church is foreclosed on . People will never have butt babies so this church will never be closed. Jessica you just described it. Its never going to happen. Jessica so youre going to fight this thing . Yeah. Jessica but theyre saying you owe over a million dollars. Thats a lot. Yeah, it is. Jessica you dont have it, do you . Oh, thats for shame. When the auction comes, the forecast is for butt babies and wont that be the ultimate twiiiiiiiiiist . cheers and applause trevor Jessica Williams, son pa, i know we settle for cable. But directv has been number one in Customer Satisfaction over cable for 15 years. father how bout over 15 satisfying years with that woman over there boiling your clothes. Her layers and layers of. Layers. Hair that ive rarely seen because its always under that bonnet. And how she fought off that grizzly and made him into these slippers. Thats satisfaction son. vo dont be a settler, get a 100 reward card when you switch to directv. Hey there, starting your search for the ri am used car . You got it. Just say show me millions of used cars for sale at the all new carfax. Com. But, i don want one thats had a bunch of owners just say, show me cars with only one owner pretty cool its perfect. Thats the power of carfax® find the cars you want, avoid the ones you dont plus you get a free carfax® report with every listing start your used car search at carfax. Com who needs a six pack, when you got. The nose. Or a nose. When you got the suit. Now, you dont need a suit when you got the fire. Or fire when you rock those heels. Or when you got the brains. The awww. Who needs some other thing when you got. Your thing. Now work on it. I. Just me. Me andrd my four daughters. Ah, theres a lot of dancing and pageants that go on in our kitchens and living rooms and things like that. Ive had to learn to accept certain things like the fact that my toe nails and finger nails are going to be painted constantly. But its really awesome to watch them at their own things. Theyre great kids. All of them. Whatever home means to you, well help you find it. Zillow. Yeah yeah here we go, go, go aha cinnamon. Milk. Cinnamilk. Cinnamon toast crunch. Crunch crave those crazy squares. Cinnamilk i know. Finally a shakeakes are for an aficionado like myself. Wait. Youre a shake aficionado . Not a shake aficionado. Tshake aficionado. Whoa. chuckles yeah. Well, perhaps you could be one too. Go ahead. Mm. Theres a coolness. Cold, its cold. Okay. Ice cream is cold . Stop the presses, guys. Ice cream is cold, says pete. Print it. New slowchurned creamery shakes are here in premium flavors like Bourbon Brown sugar. And all shakes are halfprice after 8 pm. clicks Everyone Wants to be cthe Cadbury Bunny because only he brings delicious cadbury creme eggs. While others may keep trying, nobunny knows easter better than cadbury. Trevor welcome back my guest tonight is an actor whose latest film is called triple 9. What are you doing, man . I could ask you the same thing. Well, i didnt throw a guy on the ground and try to insite a riot. You didnt hear him. He was running his mouth. Do you even know who that is . No, that was obstruction. Getting in the way of my investigation. Get out of school, man it aint no obstruction up here. Hes a lieutenant do you think somebodys going to talk now . Oh, he was a lieutenant . Yeah. I didnt realize. Ill apologize. The rules are different, this aint buckhead, all right . Trevor please welcome Anthony Mackie cheers and applause my man hey oh, yes, ive waited for this trevor you say that like i owe you money. For real trevor welcome to the show, man. I appreciate it. Trevor this is fun. This is nice. Quite nice. Trevor oh, thank you. I renovated the place . Trevor yeah. Nice skyline. Trevor got some people. cheers and applause good group. Trevor you know whats weird for me is you are a superhero now. Does that ever sink in, you are a superhero . Do kids ever look at you and go, its the dude . No, because im married. Trevor i said kids. With the kids, definitely trevor what did you think i said . I was, like, the kids arent looking at you . No, im married. I come home and i say, baby, im a superhero. Shes, like, trash trevor oh, your kids yeah. Im talking about my kids trevor people at home were, like, what just happened there . No, thats what married people do, they make babies. Only on the weekends. Trevor lets talk about the streets, though. Oh, im i in them streets laughter trevor in the streets, do the people go, its the superhero . All the time. But, like, i have a weird fan base, so, you know, i go out and it could be literally a room full of women and they go, la, la, la. And theres one dude and he goes, oh, my ahhh and im, like, really . I got dudes i walked through the airport last week and this dude in t. S. A. Stopped, held the whole line. And a woman says, i dont care about him, he aint nobody to me, and hes, like, oh, my ahhh ahhh trevor what is happening in that moment . Thats what im trying to figure out, ahhh i love you thats what they do. Its really weird. Thats superhero life, homey. Trevor i wont make that sound anymore, then. laughter no, its really a big deal because kids get to see you. It is. Trevor your character has weird superpowers in the movie because youre captain americas friend. You know your character originally can talk to birds, right . All the time. Trevor i havent seen that in the movie. No, its in there. Trevor ive never seen it. No, you have to watch the movie. I suddenly drop it in there. When im in my living room in cap and black widow come to the door, i open the door and go and i talk to them. Trevor these are like extended scenes ive never seen. No, its in there. I give little hints, you know. Thats how i talk to my birds. laughter trevor triple 9. Great movie. Trevor i was supposed to say that. Sorry. Sorry. Talk about it. Talk about it. Trevor great movie. Triple 9. Great movie. No, i mean it, guys. The cost is insane. Its didnt cost that much. Trevor its, like, everyone knows everyone. You see the people and youre in an amazing cast of actors and stories. The cost . Trevor no the cast. He cost . Trevor the cast. british accent laughter all right, im tripping. Im tripping. Trevor the cast. american accent. the cast. Oh i got it i didnt know what you were saying. I was trying to clear it up because i was confused. I aint from here. Its a good cause. Good cause. Trevor house of the cast in the movie, anthony . Its great, man a great cast of people and we had a good time and i knew once i got cost in this movie it would be a brilliant situation of costing for the costing director. I didnt understand, but we back, were right here. Trevor you know this is black on black, dont you know. I know it see that . I didnt understand you now i understand you, bro i got you, tramp come on, man i got you bring it back trevor go watch the movie. It has an amazing cast. Triple 9 in hi. Hi. I love your pants. Thanks. These pants are really speaking to me. Can i look at the back . Ooooooooooooooh do you even know what you have back there . Give me your pants. You should go to old navy. All pants are on sale up to 40 off. Ahhhhhh you guys im gonna get those pants hi im kristie. And im jess. And we are the bug chicks. Were a nanobusiness. Windows 10 really helps us get the word out about how awesome bugs are. Kids learn to be brave and curious and all kids speak the language of bug. Hey cortana, find my katydid video. Oh this is so good. If youre trying to teach a kid about a proboscis. Just sketch it on the screen. I dont have a touch screen on my mac, im jealous of that. You put a big bug in a kids hands and change their world view. [ laugh ] i started smoking when i was 16. I thought it would make me look so cool and feel so free. Now i have end stage copd, and ive had lung surgery. And im chained to an oxygen tank. My tip is; if you keep smoking, your freedom may only go as far as your oxygen tube. announcer you can quit. For free help, call 1800quitnow. Aha cinnamon. Milk. Cinnamilk. Cinnamon toast crunch. Crunch crave those crazy squares. Cinnamilk okayits chewy. His . Really icy. Wooh. Thats intense it just hits you. Its gum. No. Its totally a mint its disappearing as i am chewing it. Where did it go . Its not a gum. Not a mint. Its a breakthrough in cool. Ice breakers cool blasts. My son and i used to watch the red carpet shows on tv now, im walking them. Life is unpredictable being flake free isnt. Because i have used head and shoulders for 20 years. Used regularly, it removes up to 100 of flakes keeping you protected live flake free for life ithere was 14 of us in a four bedroom apartment. To be the first kid to buy a house. Its a very proud moment. Whatever home means to you, well help you find it. Zillow. cheers and applause trevor thats it for our show here it, is everybody. Your moment of zen. There is lots of folks here who believe that the Second Amendment in this country is under attack and gunfire and say a short distance away donald trump opportunity oh, my god this is gonna be the best spring break ever i know listen, check this out upon arrival, ask the van driver for your cancun Madness Party pass, and drink free for the first 50 hours that is so rad oh, my god, jessica . Kiki . Tasha . Becca . Misty . Wait, thats one too many names. Oh, sorry. Im a little drunk already [ laughter ] woohoo where are you guys breaking at this year . Oh, we always go to cancun for spring break, cause you can get a hotel room for like 3. And everyone there is so friendly, you can just get in a random car and theyll give you a ride it doesnt even have to be a cab. Thats cool im meeting a guy i met on myspace in amsterdam, cause i thought it would be fun to try group sex and hash the same week. [ laughter ] im going to chechyna, cause the drinking age there is 9 woo woohoo whats in all those bags . Oh, um, all my spring break necessitatas this one has cash, my dr. Seuss hat, and a poncho, in case i fall asleep on the street. And this little one is cause i like to bring my own roofies oh, girl power i brought a luna bar, because i swore i would eat something this year oh, i wish i thought of that. Ill split it with you okay last year, i got so sunburned they had to cut my bikini off for the hot boobs contest. Last year, when i got back to school, i found a 10 bill in my butt. [ laughter ] hey, whats your major, again . Womens studies, with a concentration in feminist literature. All woohoo i hope they have a rum shower