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White people are afraid of is having to win games without you. laughter a quick note to all the racists out there, when youre paint ago ago painting a swastika with feces, the joke is on you. Oh, yeah black people will know how much i hate them almost mmhmm what a punishment laughter lets move on to dr. Ben carson. laughter yes, he may be a neurosurgeon and a president ial candidate, but he dropped a new track and its dope. This campaign add running several cities. Vote and support ben carson for our next president itd be awesome america became a great nation early on not because it was flooded with politicians but because it was flooded with people who understood the value of personal responsibility trevor whoo damn yeah, he gets it. laughter that is the best rap about personal responsibility since j. D. s 99 problems about my fico score and won. But being a rap star is about your street cred. Thats why ben carson spent his life telling everyone how hard he used to be. A as teenager, i would go out to people with rocks, bricks, baseball bats and hammers. Carson describes punching a classmate with a lock in his hand. A teenager angered me. I had a large camping knife and tried to stab him in the abdomen. Unfortunately, under his clothing, he had on large metal belt buckle, and the knife plate struck with such force that it broke. Trevor see, thz this is why we need guns. Carson could have killed all those people if only he had a gun, and not waste any time with a little knife. What a great moral to the story. Ran around with a knife, stabbed the kid and was like, im enjoying. This i should find a job where i can cut people open all the time. laughter if youre wondering who he tried to stab, the answer makes him seem more hard core. The person i tried to stab, you know, i talked to today, and it was a close relative of mine. Trevor ah, i called them and i was, like, hey. Remember when i stabbed you . laughter anyway, see you at thanksgiving. What do you mean im still not allowed to carve the turkey . Damn you uncle phil. You better be wearing five belts when i see you. laughter heres what we discovered, like a lot of rappers, there is controversy about how hard ben carson is. That early picture of violence is not recognizable to some who grew up with carson. Ten schoolmates and neighbors all said this is not the boy they knew. Those claims are absolutely true. Trevor this is weird for me. So the media is saying, those rumors about you having a clean record and you being an upstanding member of society, those things are true. And ben carson is, like, bullshit im dangerous and i try to kill people i should be president laughter its like the opposite of a witch trial. Ben carson, get out of this courtroom youre clearly not a witch of course, im a witch if i wasnt, could i do this . laughter but the history is not dr. Carsons strong suits. Ben carson speaking to a story controverting what children are taught that the pyramids are built for their own personal pumps. Joseph built them to store grain. He wouldnt need hermitically sealed compartments for a sepulchre. Trevor look, im not going to lie, when he says that, he sounds light. He just does hermiticallysealed compartments for a sepulchre . You know, big words make you sound right. We dont know for sure. Its not like the egyptians wrote things down. They just covered the walls with a bunch of emojis. laughter at this point, im starting wonder if ben carson or anything he said was actually true or maybe its just the way he remembered it. Did i say i, uh, separated conjoined twins . I meant to say i separated a conjoined twix. laughter so the president ial frontrunner feels the media is out to condemn him as a nonviolent archeologist. But ben carson is not going to take this lying down. When i go out, i see thousands of people, they say, dont let the media get you down. They understand that this is a witch hunt. They are getting desperate. So next week, it will be my kindergarten teach who are said i peed in my pants trevor i did not pee in my pants i stabbed my pants with urine laughter now, you might be thinking, doesnt everyone who runs vo  president get this kind of treatment . The answer according to no truth teller ben carson is no. I do not remember this level of scrutiny for one president barack obama when he was running. In fact, i remember just the opposite. If you could show me where its happened with someone else, i would take that statement back. Trevor hmm. So if we can show you where thats happened with someone else, you will take that statement back . Challenge accepted, dr. Carson. In one month, let us convene again, when here im just kidding. Barack obamas candidacy has already come under an allout attack. Questions persist about Barack Obamas identity. You smoked manner, did a little blow. Explain that. Do you think reverend right loves america as much as you . Do you accept the support of louis farrakhan. Associating with tony rezko. Making hateful comments. Emoir he has composite characters. Refusing to wear the stars and stripes on his suit. Iateed in madrassa. Having a hard time proving hes not muslim. Not a legitimate naturalborne american. Trevor yeah so they vetted obama to the point where he was a legitimate, naturalborn citizen, but at least no one never accused obama of not stabbing a guy. He got off easy. Well be right back. cheers and applause wind noise whats happening here. Is not normal, its extraordinary. Because there is no stop in us. Or you. Only go. A new world hangs outside the window beautiful and strange it must be falling away i must be sound and color im s ding g. Weve been compromised dont let hunger kill your game. Hot pockets brings you new snack bites. Bitesize hot pockets sandwiches with 100 real cheese. Guys, im back new snack bites from. ding hot pockets before it was honey in these honey nut cheerios, it was honey being collected. And honey getting made. And honey that was just beginning. Trevor welcome back you may not know this, but people in other countries pay close attention to americas elections, the same which america pays close attention to theirs. But whats it like for a recent immigrant to finally see your famed election process up close . Ronny chang. America, worlds greatest demock sivment the inalienable right to vote, genius. Billions will be spent on president ial campaigning alone kaching i sat down with an expert to learn about your amazing process. Can you tell me how america got a perfect Voting System. I wouldnt say its perfect. No, the Voting System is perfect. Please dont ruin this for me. Im not sure there is such a thing as a perfect Voting System. No, no, no its perfect there are no problems there actually are problems. In 2000 we had problems with the vote machines in florida to congress allocated about 2 billion to buy new Voting Machines. Yes 2 billion yeah yeah 2 billion making it rain 2 billion right in your pocket well, most states bought new equipment. And is it working great . Well, theyre showing their age is what i would say. Technology doesnt last forever. According to his research, that 2 billion from congress was used up over a decade ago. Now 86 of machines are outdated as a bleep finish flown. I visited with the commissioner of election to see if things are that bad. Theyre using old voter equipment. Old but cool vintage . Theyre not hip and cool. Theyre just old. Old as in shitty . Yes. Even the governor actually had problems on election day when he went to vote. It wouldnt select the candidate he was trying to vote for. Damn are Voting Machines this bad everywhere . I needed to see some up close in a local precinct like in michigan. We have 1960s microwaves. Where are the Voting Machines . These are the Voting Machines. Okay. The memory cards use a coin celibate ri. When the battery dies, we lose the data. Is your game plan on election day, please, jesus, do not let the battery in these memory cards fail . Right. Then he showed me crucial Voting Machines. Theyre hard to get but weve found them on ebay. So youre basically getting shitty technology from ebay secondhand . Thats what were doing. This is what we call our election central. Hang on. What is this . That is a 56k dialup modem. Come on speaking in Foreign Language even my grandmother in malaysia would look at this and go what the bleep i read your report. Voting machines bleep . Good lord, i come to america for this . The Voting Machines they use in india, is a briefcase, costs 175. It works for like a billion people. But in the United States machines are a lot more expensive than you expect. How expensive can these be . Each machine is about 6,000. Trevor 6,000 for this . Yes. Can you order starbucks on this . No. Can you log on to facebook . No. For 6,000, i expect to be able to bleep . I give up, can we close our eyes and pretend these machines arent a problem . When machines break, you get long lines, between 500,000 and 700,000 people werent able to vote in the 2012 elections because of long lines. Simplify for me, who the bleep do i have to blame for this . I think there is a lot of blame to go around. The federal government essentially doesnt spend any money on our elections. Wow. This democracy is doomed. Many of its own citizens cant vote because the country wont spend any more money on Voting Machines. If only we could harness the billions spent on the campaigns and stupid ads wait a minute. A voting machine that runs on ads im a genius this machine right here. Its an ipad playing a video of donald trump. How do you vote on it . You watch 10 to 15 minutes of campaign ads and you actually vote. If you dont want to see ads, you pay a 1. 99 fee. Like a poll tax . Were not in the business of making money off voters casting ballots. You dont want my voting machine, america . I hope you enjoy waiting in line for 12 hours on election day. Stupid idiot cheers and applause thank you, well be right back before it was honey in these honey nut cheerios, it was honey being collected. And honey getting made. And honey that was just beginning. My credit score for free, right . And then youre gonna ask me for my credit card so you can charge me on the down low two weeks later. Look, credit karma oh, are you talking to websites again . Its sayin free credit score. credit karma . Yeah, its actually free. Look, you dont have to put in your credit card information. Credit karma. Really free credit scores. Really. Free. Fist bump. Tick, tock. 25 years old and youre still playing in the mud. 15 feet in the air, thats where you feel most alive. 10 meter maids waiting to wallpaper your truck. Better get out of town. 5, 4, 3. The allnew tacoma. Toyota. Lets go places. Karl, dont you have fryeah, so . Ng over . It stinks in here. Youve got to wash this whole room are you kidding . Wash it . Lets wash it with febreze. For all the things you cant wash, use. Febreze fabric refresher whoa hey mrs. Webber inhales hey, it smells nice in here and try pluggable febreze. To continuously eliminate odors for. Up to 45 days of freshness pluggable febreze and fabric refresher. [inhale exhale mnemonic]. , two more ways to breathe happy im s ding g. Weve been compromised dont let hunger kill your game. Hot pockets brings you new snack bites. Bitesize hot pockets sandwiches with 100 real cheese. Guys, im back new snack bites from. ding hot pockets cheers and applause trevor welcome back to the daily show my guest tonight was a member of the fugees. He has produced and featured in the feature sweet micky for president. You need someone who can inspire the people. What a man what a man, what a man, what a mighty good man you started to talk. Man, youre the one that really can help make that change. You even understand what my anger was. I was liang you know what . You need to run for president. Trevor please welcome pras cheers and applause trevor thank you so much for being here. This is good. You look like youre running for president. Doesnt he look sharp . cheers and applause you look great, man. Thank you. Trevor thank you very much for coming to the show. I watched the movie, the documentary. Amazing story. So you picked up the phone, called a friend and said, yo, you need to be president . Yeah. Yeah. Literally, after the earthquake, i felt like i needed to do something for haiti. So the first person who came to my mind was sweet micky. I didnt realize he used to wear diapers on stage and whatnot. Trevor you didnt . I knew he was crazy but i didnt realize it because i went to my director, Ben Patterson trevor oh, this makes so much more sense yeah, i went to my director and said im supporting this guy and im going to support him for president. He said, there is a guy coming up with diapers on. He said, surely it cant be him. I said, yeah, sweet micky. He said, okay. Trevor you dont back down. Lets take it a step back. You were born and raised in new york . Yes. Trevor of haitian descent . Yes. Trevor the earthquake takes place and haiti is devastated. We saw it on the news, people donating money, it was a travesty, but haiti, this is insane, what, 200 years yeah, won independence in 1804. Trevor 200 years of independence . Yes. Trevor how many democratically elected leaders . Two. Trevor who both lived 100 years . laughter so basically, there is no democracy at this point. The first elected democratic president was in 1990. Then there was a coup, someone else came in, then he came back again. Michelle broke the mold. I dont know why i thought sweet micky would be the guy. I just thought he was so papillar in haiti. He was the Michael Jackson of haiti. I thought a popular guy could come in and inspire the people and break the mold. Thats what i was thinking about. So when i realized his antics, i was already deep in. So i had to go. Trevor do you think somebody has done this with donald trump and ben carson . laughter like, is there a possibility that someone said, you need to run . And now theyre, like, oh im too deep in because you dont know. Youve got a candidate through he wasnt even a politician . No. Trevor straighton musician . We just saw on the video. Trevor yeah, that thing he was doing. Yeah. Trevor we all saw that. Hats where he was. Trevor and you thought this guy could run. If im to bring it back to america, you know, a lot of people are saying these candidates are doing well, ben carson, carly fiorina, donald trump, because theyre not career politicians. Youve shown it can be done. People thought sweet micky was a joke. When i first called my dad, i said, i have to ask you advice, im supporting a candidate for haiti. He said, who . I said, marshel montiely. There was a long pause and then he hung up on me. laughter trevor he call you back . He was like, this kid has to be out of his mind. Trevor so you support the guy, put your resources behind him and get him in the game. You guys know nothing about politics. Knotting. Reporter you go into the race. The next thing, youre making up ground. You the frontrunners. This sounds eerily familiar. Then you decide we need to figure out a campaign. At that point we realize we need add Campaign Manager because everybody kept saying you guys look like youre going on tour because everywhere hed go, he would perform. He was, like, this is politics. You cant think, you have to talk. Trevor hes talking exactly like donald trump. There is a line in the movie where hes in the interview and the guy says, youre an entertainer, a performer, and he says, thats the character. He says, thats a character, a separate person. Yeah, he was trying to say sweet micky and mi chle smartelly are two different people. Trevor and he was saying donald trump the candidate and the man are two different people. Yes. Trevor would you run Trumps Campaign . No, that would be crazy. Trevor fascinating story, sweet micky for president opens in los angeles friday and in new york november 20th. Thank you so much, everybody thank you. This is brian. Every day, brian drives carefully to work. And every day brian drives carefully to work, there are rate suckers. Hes been paying more for Car Insurance because of their bad driving for so long, he doesnt even notice them anymore. But one day brian gets snapshot from progressive. Now brian has a rate based on his driving, not theirs. Get snapshot and see just how much your good driving could save you. Are just 9. 99 for a limited time. Hurry in for allyoucaneat enchiladas filled with fresh flavors for just 9. 99. Got to get up if you want to get down get up im s ding g. Weve been compromised dont let hunger kill your game. Hot pockets brings you new snack bites. Bitesize hot pockets sandwiches with 100 real cheese. Guys, im back new snack bites from. ding hot pockets ono offdays, or downtime. Ason. Opportunity is everything you make of it. This winter, take advantage of our seasons best offers on the latest generation of cadillacs. The 2016 cadillac srx. Get this lowmileage lease from around 339 per month, or purchase with 0 apr financing. cheers and applause trevor thats our show. Before we go, tomorrow night, well be live tweeting the debate, check it out on the daily show, starting 9 00 p. M. Now here it is. Your moment of zen. A photo spread is describing carsons home as a temple to himself including a painting of the candidate with jesus. Announcer youre watching fox friends. And welcome back to fox friends, im steve doocy. Joining me as always, gretchen carlson, brian kilmeade. Hello good morning. Well, the latest job numbers have prompted some people to say that thing are looking up, but i still know a whole lot of folks out of work out there. Gretchen yeah. And what is the president doing about it . Congratulating basketball players for being gay . I know. Ooo. Wow. Of course we support nba player Jason Collins in his decision. Yes. But can we please stop calling him a hero . Exactly. mumbling i mean, since when does telling your embarrassing personal secrets make you a hero . Hey, everybody i prefer asian ladies. Im a hero hey, hey. I use prescription deodorant on my entire body, give me medal. Give her a medal i practice french kissing on my own hand. Isnt that right, jessica . Oh, you so crazy, brian kilmeade. kissing i will say, though, i am surprised that the first gay athlete was in basketball. I would have thought it would have been hockey. You know, because its so close to figure skating. Mmhmm. Yeah. Yeah. I always thought it would be the guy in football who hikes the ball. I mean, hes already in that position. Steve good point. Good point i thought it would be a wnba player. I mean, a lot of those guys look like women already. Brian, those are women. chuckles

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