Jon that is our show join us next week at 11 00 p. M. I say that every time, dont i . Here it is, your moment of zen. Netflix is telling customers that verizon and other internet providers are to blame for slow speeds on video streaming. If i had the pipes and spent all the money on the pipes i would make netflix is like this speaking very slowly if they dont like it they can build controversy rocks football. A new obama scandal, this time he traded five taliban members for string cheese and a pudding pack. And my guest rock legend Chrissie Hynde has a miew album called stockholm. I wont like it at first, but then ill grow to love and identify with it. A study found smoking marijuana can make men infertile, if youre going to have unprotected sex. Get high first. Captioning sponsored by Comedy Central stephen welcome to the report. Thathank you so much for joining us, ladies and gentlemen. Stephen Stephen Stephen thank you, ladies and gentlemen. Im not surprised folks. I join you in your celebration. I know where that good feeling is rooted. Because, nation, once again, if you read the papers,un that once again, it is a great day for our country in that it is a terrible day for barack obama. He is facing a firestorm of criticism after trading five highlevel taliban fighters for captured bowe bergdahl. Its a scandal some are calling bergdghazi. So far, its just me, but its going to catch on. On tuesday, at the g7 summit in poland, the president defended his actions. Let me just make a very simple point here, and that is regardless of the circumstances, whatever those circumstances may turn out to be, we still get an measure soldier back from captivity. Period. Stephen you cant argue with that. Comma. Or can you. Question mark. Of course, we want to get every american soldier back. Because the tv has some questions. Is he an American Hero or a deserter . A member of his platoon says bergdahl left his own post ohis own volition, back in 2009. Shortly before he walked off the base he wrote to his parents about his disillusionment with the military and his mission in afghanistan. Hear that . This guy had grown disillusioned with the war in afghanistan. And theres only one wordinar 82 of americans. Plus, should we be bringing this guy back when several of those who served with bergdahl charged that soldiers died searching for him . And i agree with anyone who says best way to honor their sacrifice is to never complete their mission. And now, were also learning that bergdahl has a history of unamerican behavior dating back to his childhood in sun valley, idaho. Well, he apparently was into ballet. At the age of 16, he started taking ballet lessons at a local studio. I didnt know until today that he took ballet. How long did he do that . He started taking ballet when he was about 17 and continued taking it until he was 22, 23. Stephen yes, long before bergdahls time with the taliban militia, he spent years in the hand of another radical group, the sugarplum fairies. And fox news dr. Keith ablow knows what it means when a man does ballet. The fact that he was a dancer and a lifter not a weightlifter, but he would i guess lift up the ball rina. What does that mean . I think front and center on any stage is this guys m. O. , unless it doesnt feed him narcissistically. You cant give him a job unless youre going to tell him youre the star and were going to keep you at a throttle of 12 out of 10. Stephen thats why he was disillusioned the mission in afghanistan it lacked the fullthrottle intensity of the sun valley,ideo ballet school. Just to recap deserter. Endangered soldiers lives. Skipped around inatitis. Aaaaand. Im forgetting something. The father with the beard. Stephen dad, beard. Dad beard. Bad dad. Baghdad. Coincidence its a different country, we mee doth think he beards too much. Well have more on this story as information becomes available which i hope is never because right now im in the sweet spot between complete ignorance and righteous indignation. Pretty great. Information, the New York Times is now reporting there were fixed so, matches leading up to the 2010 world cup, but i dont believe that sock ser fixed because nothing can fix that game. This is the sporreport. cheers and applause first, when it comes to International Sport no one takes it more seriously than our enemies in north korea. To them, every game is the hunger games. And now, their athletes could become kim jong unbeatable. A new sports drink is claiming to enhance physical ability and speed recovery and its all due to the miracle ingredient mushroom fungus. North korean Scientists Say the drink is very effective. Stephen yeah, north korea has developed a mushroombased sports drink, which brings me to the firstever installment of sporreport. Where athletes applause where athletes and fungus come together and for once, not in their jocks. According to the korean central news agency, d. P. R. K. Scientists have succeeded in finding the way to cultivate mushroom fungus and made a functional drink. This natural drink is very effective in enhancing the physical abilities of sports persons and recovering from their fatigue. Enhancing sports persons and recovering from fatigue. That is a onetwo punching we cant be in competition for. More proof north korea is shiitaking this program seriously . Look at this photo of kim jongun. Its hard to say where the mushrooms begin and his hair cut ends. One company has a mushroombased sports drink its campbells. Their cream of mushroom superdelegate really helps replenish your bodys natural soup. Campbells, if youre smart, youll rename the thirst quencher, campbells new sportobellow. That smells like victory, and a little like a freshly dug grave. Second, folks, i love football. I d. V. R. Every game, and so do the players because its the only way they can remember what happened. Thats why im so disgusted by the betrayal can you remember playing out in the nfl where over 500 former players have joined a lawsuit against the league that made them famous and drug adictd invalids gee, a new lawsuit alleges nfl teams and their doctors knowingly gave players an array of prescription drugs and pain killers for years and years without any regard for the longterm damage. Former football plaishz by the hundreds claim the league illegally drugged them to make sure they could stay in the game. In many cases did not even tell them what was wrong with them. Our players were shot up like cattle. They were brought to market, and then discarded like pieces of meat. Stephen what an exaggeration. Americas cattle are given far fewer drugs. And oh, what wonderful pain killing drugs they were. It was like willy wonka and the everlasting throb stuffers. Not only did you have percodan, percocet, vied din, but also ambien. So if you ever thought the jets looked like they were asleep out there, youre right. What really saddens me cheers and applause you fans of the jets or narcotics out here tonight . What really saddens me, folks, is three of the plaintiffs are members of my beloved 1985 super bowl champion Chicago Bears who we should have known were jookd something when they made this. Stephen how could you suit nfl . You gave your word pup werent here to start no trouble. Next, finally, the olympics. Folks, the summer games are just two years away in Rio De Janeiro, the perfect city to carry on the spirit of the first olympics because everyone there is already oiled up and naked. laughter and, folks, excitement is building in rio. In fact, that might be the only thing thats building. Host city Rio De Janeiro is so far behind in its preparations. The project is facing unprecedented delays. Roads going nowhere, unfinished stands. And an awful lot of construction work still to do. The top olympics official is slamming preparations for the 2016 games in rio, calling them the worst hes experienced in nearly 40 years. Stephen the worst ever experienced. And that is saying something because there are still some olympic athletes trapped in their sochi hotel bathrooms. But, folks, there is one event that will be more affected by the delays than any other sailing. Because rios gaanabarra bay is so filled with raw sewage and garbage, that one sailors dinghy crashed into what he believed was a partly submerged sofa. And another one encountered human corpses on four occasions while sailing in the bay. Four corpses, folks. Thats bad. The sofa only holds three. laughter well be right back. Well, were Peanut Butter and chocolate. Were perfect together. He says when somethings good, why change it . What if you were to try Something Different . [ chocolate laughs ] [ male announcer ] its a whole new way to love Peanut Butter chocolate. Smooth and crunchy butterfinger Peanut Butter cups. Smooth and crunchy butterfinger dont just visit rome. Visit tripadvisor rome. With millions of reviews, tripadvisor makes any destination better. Nineteen years ago, we thought, wow, how is there no way to tell the good from the bad . So we gave people the power of the review. And now angies list is revolutionizing local service again. You can easily buy and Schedule Services from toprated providers. Conveniently stay up to date on progress. And effortlessly turn your photos into finished projects with our snapfix app. Visit angieslist. Com today. The Clean Air Act stops polluters from. Poisoning his air with arsenic, lead and mercury. Now the loop hole that lets them pump unlimited carbon. Pollution into his air is closing too. If polluters and their friends in washington dont interfere. Bunch thanks so much. Welcome back, everybody. Thanks. Folks, folks, check your calendars because you want to know that the 2016 election is right around the corner and i have four questions . Who will run . Who the parties nominate . Should i have said whom will they nominate . When does one use the objective pronoun form of who . Have i gotten off topic . , of course, the question karl rove wants everyone asking is whether democratic frontrunner Hillary Clinton is too old and infirm to be president. Karl rove suggested Hillary Clinton may have brain damage. Look, shell be 69 by the time of the 2016 election. She will be 77 if she serves two terms. Stephen let me check the math there. Okay, yeah, okay, i have 69 straws in one hand, and let me get let me get eight more straws. Yeah, yeah, that really feels like a grasping at a lot of straws. laughter applause well, yesterday, yesterday, one eagleeyed journalist cast further doubts about Hillary Clintons advanced dereppitude. Hillary clintons recent cover shoot for people is raising a lot of eyebrows. Drudge reported tweeted, is Clinton Holding a walker . Stephen thats a fair and reasonable question. I do not doubt for a second that if Hillary Clinton used a walker, shed insist on appearing with it on the cover of people magazine. No surprise, information, hillary huggers people flew into damage control releasing this statement. Secretary clinton is standing next to a patio chair. Of or as doctors call it a stationery poolside jazzy. And drudge didnt mention ride of right beside clinton right there is an announcement that alice from the brady bunch die. Coincidence, or did Hillary Clinton beat her to death with her walker . applause . cheers i dont know why clinton sat for these geriatric photos. She should follow reagans example and only pose for youthful shots like this one. No, jimmy. I said the shot of ronald reagan, not justin bieber. What . Thats him . Oh, i see. Fresh gippdog. The point is, folks, this people issue is incredibly damaging for clinton. I just cannot wait to see how conservatives react to her latest press conference. Oh, my god. Shes still going to win. Well be right back. Its never been easier to find a dentist. Watch. Dentist. [ popping ] now you have to figure out which one takes your insurance. [ sighs ] okay. Now, a dentist you trust and feel comfortable going to. Hrmm. I know. At 1800dentist, weve helped over 8 Million People find that right dentist, and we can do the same for you. [ chuckles ] so dont put it off. Call 1800dentist today. So dont put it off. Call 1800dentist today. Rich, chewy caramel rolled up in smooth milk chocolate. All aboard. Rolo. Get your smooth on. Yeah, girl you know, ive been thinking about us and, uh, i just cant fight it anymore its bundle time bundle mm, feel those savings, baby and thats how a home and auto bundle is made. Better he learns it here than on the streets. The miracle of bundling now, thats progressive. cheers and applause . Stephen my guest tonight a rock n roll hall of famer. Please welcome Chrissie Hynde. Thanks so much for coming on. Nice to have you on. Thank you. Stephen im a big fan. Was i right about that . Do you like dogs . Theyre okay. Stephen the people who may be the i didnt thinkest of the youngsters out there, and dont know youre the leader of the legendary pretenders. Yeah cheers and applause . Stephen indelible rock n roll classics, nova road back on the chain gang. And many, many more. Stephen and all yours for 9. 99. Youve been honored so many times. The rock n roll hall of fame was that a huge deal for to you get in there . I guess. Stephen can i say thats very rock n roll of you to react that way. Youre from ohio its kind of sort of an establishment thing. Thats not really why i got in the game. So. Stephen its an award. Arent the awards what were in this for. A lot of people are. Stephen the work is nice, but if you dont get an award for it, all you have is what you created. Thats a fair way of looking at it. Stephen thank you. My dad was very proud of his bowling trophies, so i have to respect that. Stephen was he good . He was good, yeah. Stephen did he ever go pro . Not really, no. He could have. Stephen sad story. laughter youre from ohio. Akron, right . Yes. Stephen weve had on devo. Friends of yours. We had the the black keys, all from akron. What is it about akron that makes people rock so hard . Well, you know, we were the rubber capital of the world. Stephen uhhuh. Is it the fumes that got to you . It was well, no, we also had the quaker oats silos there. You had the best of both. Stephen youre very regular. You ever are you trying to flirt with me . laughter . Stephen a little bit. All right. cheers and applause . Stephen can i get to the beef ive got with you . Yes. Stephen you have been youre from the heartland of america. One of the original 13 states, yes. Stephen why have you been in england for four years . Why have you rejected lady liberty to live under the tyranny of a queen . Well,un, i have my band there. Giwhere the music is. Im sort of have band will travel and thats where they live. Stephen so youre a mercenary yes. Stephen and you dont care what country youre in. Im eye citizen of the world. Im a hippie, man. Stephen oh, really. Well, hippiedippy. Would you please do a song for us . Do you come on to all your guests like this . laughter . Stephen not all of them. Not all of them. I gotta say, not all of them show this much skin. Just and you michael skypes. Iggy did. Are you going by any chance tear your top off and wrestle around on the stage . Well. Dont know. How much time have you got . Lets figure that out. Stephen we might be out for a long commercial break. So stick around. Beebt of well be right back with a performance by Chrissie Hynde. Rich, chewy caramel rolled up in smooth milk chocolate. All aboard. Rolo. Get your smooth on. n2 dont just visit new york. Visit tripadvisor new york. With millions of reviews, tripadvisor makes any destination better. The Clean Air Act stops polluters from. Poisoning his air with arsenic, lead and mercury. Now the loop hole that lets them pump unlimited carbon. Pollution into his air is closing too. If polluters and their friends in washington dont interfere. Judge. Stephen and now ainatis ainatist native of the 17th state of the union, here to perform a song after her new ambum, stockholm. Ladies and gentlemen, Chrissie Hynde. Baby got your groove back another kind of life one you think that you deserve nothing you should lack now reverting back to type never mind you lost your nerve yeah you had a go at sleeping in the van but you couldnt let it go too far now youve got a pension plan and your names on the insurance and you can drive another womans car a kind of glamour you can lend yourself like dark sunglasses youll remember how good it tasted inside the ruling classes wasted behind your dark sunglasses shes got a ball gown for charities and such like a debutant from days gone by shave and wear a tie it isnt sacrificing much lucky guy you can still get high yes sir, no sir, sunday well be there you only have to please that lady think anything you like, but be careful what you say for another warm night another dry day a kind of glamour you can lend yourself like dark sunglasses youll remember how good it tasted the ruling class is wasted behind your dark sunglasses im not towing the line youll be fine im not towing the line a kind of glamour you can lend yourself like dark sunglasses youll remember how good it tasted the ruling classes a kind of glamour you can lend yourself like dark sunglasses youll remember how good it tasted inside the ruling classes wasted behind your dark sunglasses wasted behind your dark sunglasses cheers and applause stephen Chrissie Hynde. Stockholm. Good night. Red by Comedy Central captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org