Stephen well, good news. Good news, ronnie, because come midnight tonight those nine words will be im from the government and i will work for food. laughter and applause and tonight cheers and applause and, folks, tonight i will be covering the end of government in a mustsee Television Event the finale of breaking gov. cheers and applause laughter yes, tonight the United States government ends oh, it has been a hell of a ride, folks. What a dramatic arc it started out as a highly sympathetic character in the 1770s, but in just 237 seasons, it has transformed into an egotistical selfdestructive maniac. laughter folks, i am dying to know what goes down tonight. I mean, whats gonna happen to mr. White . Mr. White . Mr. Off white and pinkman. Well, orangeman. laughter the best part about the finale of breaking gov is that the bad guys are all getting eliminated the National Park service, the center for disease control, nasa, which is slated to furlough 97 of its employees immediately. audience reacts i believe we have a sneak peek of nasas final scene. laughter and the government hadnt even shut down yet, but the reviews are already in. Michele bachmann raves were very excited. Its exactly what we wanted and we got it. And California Rep devon nunez says conservative republicans are all giddy about it. Of course theyre giddy. They will still get paid in the event of a shutdown. boos of course yeah, thats one of the dramatic turns. No one saw that coming. Of course i know, full of surprises. All of this assumes there is not a deal in the next 25 minutes. So, jim, lets check in on the negotiations. laughter and applause thats i gotta say, folks, that is going way better than i thought. laughter now, nation, i think of myself as an objective observer because i object to everything i observe. laughter this is tip of the hat; wag of the finger. cheers and applause laughter the wheels are coming off laughter nation, its late september, which means its time to gear up for thanksgiving. I love it all the food, the family, the laughing, the drinking, the no wonder your wife left you, margaret, the thats not the proper word for asians, nana. The everybody help clean up, mom locked herself in the laundry room with a bottle of chardonnay. Its a special time and no thanksgiving is complete without Butterball Turkeys. Theyre an american classic, just like that pilgrims kept in dark cages their entire lives up to their ankles in their own feces. Pass me another drumstick. And their latest announcement made me even more of a tryptophan. laughter the Butterball Turkey talk line is looking far few good men. For the first time, the turkey seller is looking to hire male operators to help give advice to anyone trying to make the perfect turkey during the holidays. For the past 32 years, only women have offered advice on the Butterball Turkey talk line. Stephen finally men on the turkey talk line i mean cheers and applause its about damn time the men were on the turkey talk line besides the ones at the n. S. A. laughter so a big tip of the hat to butterball for recognizing that men have the right stuffing. laughter folks, as butterball says more and more men are involved in thanksgiving dinner and today one in every four calls are from men. Butterball knows when a guy calls anyone, he wants another man on the line laughter just like phone sex. Men know what men like. laughter because men will give men manly cooking tips like buy turkey, lay on couch until sharon says its time to carve the bird, serve and eat, return to couch. Classic recipe. cheers and applause so good for you, butterball, for putting some man gravy on this years bird. audience reacts the butterball is good, butterballs are better. laughter next up, folks, i am hypercompetitive and if you dont know that by now well, then i give up. laughter so i am giving a wag of the finger to the New York TimesScience WriterAshley Merryman for an oped she wrote last week entitled losing is good for you. Well, if you really feel that way, ms. Merryman, great news, i think youre a loser. laughter merryman here claims america has gone trophy crazy, especially when it comes to our kids and that after years of researching the effects of praise on kids the science is clear awards can be powerful motivators but nonstep recognition does not inspire children to succeed, instead it can cause them to underachieve. Wrong laughter wrong this country was built on awards. What do you think gave washington the confidence to defeat the british . It was his fourth grade most improved karate participation profy laughter listen up listen up, the New York Times. I know whats going on here. You published some liberal j. D. About awards being terrible and losing the s the best right after i win these. cheers and applause skrao ed. cheers and applause clearly, clearly, clearly somebody is jealous. Because while ive been showered in gold, the only Golden Shower the New York Times gets is congress teal urine. laughter finally, folks, everyone knows im close to the jesus. He carries me on that beat so often he got a baby bjorn. Thats why im giving a wag of my finger to science for slandering my religion. The institute of applied immunology showed one of the worst contaminated water sources on the planet is in churches. 86 of holy water contains fecal matter. audience reacts it would explain why theyre always burning incense. laughter now, folks, ive always known holy water was dangerous. I mean, just look what happens when you drink it. laughter screaming a moment on the lips, an eternity of not having lips. laughter but what if theres fecal matter . Listen to the socalled solutions. The researchers say if the churches would just add salt and regularly change the water problem could be eliminated. Stephen add salt and change the water . Were blessing ourselves, not making linguini. laughter you do notes me with the original recipe. It works. Taking the fecal matter out of holy water would be like taking the fecal matter out of cocacola. Im not saying its in there, im just saying ive never seen the recipe and it is dark brown. Well be right back. cheers and applause stephen welcome back, everybody, my guest tonight is the creator of breaking bad. He had better tread lightly. Please welcome vince gill lann cheers and applause Vince Gilligan hey, vince, good to see you again thanks for coming back, man. Nice to see you again. Great to see you, too. Stephen last time you were here you were just starting to write the last season we just saw, correct . Yes, that is correct. Stephen how did it go . I havent heard much. laughter it seemed to go well. Stephen it sure did, man. You are the man of the hour, okay . First question. Why stop . laughter are you allergic to cash . Because a. M. C. Must have been begging for you to keep this thing going because you guys are on a rocket ride to banktown 10. 3 Million People watched it last night. I know, can you believe it . Stephen blew the door off all your previous ratings. Amazing, amazing. Stephen what was the premier . The very first show, what was that . The premier was probably under a million viewers. We went up against some big Football Game and we got we just got crushed and so it was nice ending on the highest viewership we ever had. That was wonderful. cheers and applause stephen okay. First of all, congratulations on your emmy. And congratulations on your emmy, my friend. cheers and applause . Stephen i wasnt fishing, but it took you almost 90 seconds to say that. laughter lets talk about walter for a second. Youve been living with this evil guy in your head for over six years now. Is it going to be hard to get him out of there . You know what . Its yeah, i think it will be hard. My writers, my six writers and i spent a lot of time thinking about this guy and, yeah, hes a tough guy to have stuck in your head for 24 hours a day, six years straight. Stephen people ask me sometimes, like, when did walter lose you . He never lost me. Okay. Stephen i was with him to the very end. It all made sense to me. Okay, good, good. Stephen didnt always root for him but it always made sense to me. Yeah, now thats im glad. He always made sense to me, too. If the character never made sense to us as writers or to Bryan Cranston as the guy playing him that would be tough to he never lost us that way. Stephen were you rooting for him . There was times it became extremely difficult to root for him because he was kind of a bastard a lot of times. laughter . Stephen what do you think is the most evil thing he did . When he broke bad, whats the worst he broke in your opinion . I think nastiest thing he ever did spoiler alert if you havent seen it stephen hold on one second. If you dont want to be spoiled, i tell you what, mute your television, go to youtube and watch this video of a get to having a bath for the first time. laughter when we finish spoiling, ill hold the unmute sign up. laughter okay, all right, were gone. Were gone. Let rip. Let rip. You know e what . It was two episodes ago, it was an episode that was the moment where walt said to jesse with apparent glee i watched jane die. She choked to death and i could have saved her and i didnt. I think that was the most sadistic nasty thing. Stephen worse than watching her die and not helping . laughter yes, you know why . Because in that moment he watched her die there was a lot of conflicting emotions going on in his face and he is he doesnt want to do it but he thinks its the right thing for jesse because shes hicked him on heroin hooked him on heroin and you see he doesnt want to do it. But pure sadism is not something walt oddly enough, with all the evil things he did he was not purely sadistic very often. At that time that was the most sadistic, i think, telling jesse that he watched. Stephen why again, spoiler alert. Why kill walt off at the end . I mean, why not keep him going at least in the walking dead . laughter you know, just move him over to the next project. laughter hell get even smarter from eating all those brains laughter that is a good thought. Stephen why did you decide he had to go . It seemed like the implicit promise in the show from the First Episode. The First Episode he is told he has two years to live thereabouts. And it seems like we should we should adhere to our promise we impolicedly made the audience maybe not implicitly, explicitly. Stephen hes got cancer at the beginning. Yeah, yeah. Stephen does he become a cancer . laughter i think he actually does. I think thats an excellent point. Stephen was that deep of me . Was i deep just now . laughter extremely deep. Stephen will you hold on . Id love to talk a little bit more. Ill get more deepness. Weve got to take a commercial break and well come back and talk more. Right on. Stephen well be right back with more Vince Gilligan breaking bad. cheers and applause everybody were here talking to Vince Gilligan the creator of breaking bad about last night and the entire series. One of the great things, again, spoiler alert one of the great things that walt does to skyler is i did it for me. Why does that seem like the nicest thing he has said to his family all five seasons . I think youre exactly right. You know why . Because one of the worst things hes done in this show is lie to them so much and destroy the family through lies as well as action. And to do his wife the courtesy of being honest, to show her that respect once at least before its all over. Stephen is that thing when he says i did it for me, is that necessarily a bad thing or a bad motivation . Because, i mean, i do this for me. laughter dont you do your show for you . Yeah. Stephen is the show your blue meth . The show is you know, the show is my blue meth and now i need to be in some sort of 12step Recovery Program because its over. laughter . Stephen the fame of the last episode was called felina from Marty Robbins hit down in the west texas town of el paso, i fell in love with a mexican girl he has to come back because the bad guys have captured his girlfriend or the authorities have to draw him back and he comes back for his girlfriend in the song knowing hes going to die. Yeah, yeah. Stephen walt comes back. Does he come back for jesse, to save him . Or is he coming back for the blue meth . Is the blue meth his girlfriend . I think to use lord of the rings terms stephen please. Please. I think hes coming back for his precious and his precious is the blue meth in the lab, the lab he constructed. When he comes back, i think hes coming back to set things right financially for his family and after that he just wants to wipe out uncle jack and his gang and he realizes in the hour in this final hour that jesse is still alive and he wants to wipe out jesse, too. But in other wonderful western terms, its a bit like the end of the searchers. All throughout the searchers john wayne is chasing after natalie woods character and shes been taken by the comanches and he keeps saying when i find her, im going to kill her. And at the last minute when he cease her he sweeps her up in his arms and says lets go home. And its a tear jerking wonderful ending and we stole from the best. Stephen vince, thank you so much for coming. I know you came here, like you flew out first thing in the morning after did you party all night . I partied until about midnight. Im a little little a little tired today but i fly id fly 10,000 miles for you, stephen. audience reacts . Stephen my favorite guest of all time, Vince Gilligan. Thank you so much. Vince gilligan, breaking bad in its entirety. Well be right back. Rs aneers an report, everybody good night cheers and applause laughter hows it going . Stephen, please let me go stephen i want more breaking bad its over, i just cant write anymore. Stephen its over when i say its over theres no story left to tell. Stephen what about badger . City pete . What about fuel . What about to him. What about walt, jr. . What about to jesse . Did he get in a car accident . He was driving pretty fast what about walter . Maybe hes not dead maybe he was making it. Maybe hes got a twin brother. Maybe he was just dreaming the whole time and hes still back in New Hampshire or still sitting in the Doctors Office in the First Episode looking at that mustard stain theres got to be an answer use your imagination. Stephen, please. Stephen keep typing, bitch cheers and applause captioning sponsored by Comedy Central captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org captioning sponsored by Comedy Central from Comedy Centrals World Headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart [ cheers and applause ] jon hey ladies and gentlemen, my name is jon stewart. Man do we have a show tonight. Our guest tonight is going to be talking about a book i have not been this excited about a book in god knows how long, i mean you know half the crap i have on this show, but this book, the author is not David Mitchell, David Mitchell is going to be on here promoting it. It is a book written by a japanese 13yearold boy about what it is like to have autism. It is incredible. One of the most incredible things i think i have ever read. Lets begin tonight with last nights march toward government shutdown, the Cable Networks were so excited they went around the clock, transitioning relentlessly from count down clock to before shutdown to count down clock after shutdown because on cable news this is the demarcation point in history on par with the birth of christ. By the way, cnn has just been given a new show, time of day. Coming up, 6 00 oclock. Kidding, cnn would never give a show to them, but pundits with opposing views about what time it is. Tonight