Jones, a man who called himself god. How very much ive loved you. How very much ive tried my best to give you the good life. Who convinced his followers to kill their children and then kill themselves. Let us be done with it. Lets be done with the agony of it. Drinking a koolaid type fruit punch laced with deadly cyanide. Something to put you to rest. Oh, god. 30 years later in a place where words could kill and did, there is silence. An empty field, the people gone. Almost no trace of their lives or dreams. This is the site of jonestowns openair meeting hall where im standing right now, where the reverend jim jones led his followers into the worst mass murder and suicide pact in americas history. Only small golden flowers grow where bodies once lay. On that fateful morning, there are more than 940 People Living in jonestown. By nightfall, only 33 would still be alive. For most of the few who did survive, it took incredible courage to defy jim jones and step away. This is their story, one of desperation and daring and, in the end, a story of human triumph amid horrible tragedy. It was a slave camp ran by a mad man with a huge ego. As a young mother, Leslie Wilson went to guyana because her husband had taken their son there. In jonestown, she found not enough food, not enough sleep, too much fear. For me to think i was going to see the age of 21 was a miracle. I didnt think i was going to see 21. She recoiled the first time jim jones called together peoples temple members for a suicide drill. And i remember him looking at me and me looking like, please dont ask me to do this. Because we really didnt know if it was real or not. On the last morning, she said she wanted to take her child on a picnic and started on a daylong trek to a town 30 miles away. Everyone can look up and see us walking, and i was just shaking. I was so, so frightened. For years, Leslie Wilson would not let anyone know she was a jonestown survivor. Because i would sit at the table sometimes at work, whatever, and they would talk about jonestown. I didnt say a word. I mean, i lived under a veil of secrecy for 20something years. Vernon gosney, now a policeman in hawaii, remembers jonestown as an armed camp supposedly to guard against outsiders. But many of the times the guns were pointed towards us. Gosney wanted to leave as soon as he arrived but couldnt until a california congressman, leo ryan, came to guyana in the fall of 78 on a oneman investigative mission. I had decided i was going to pass a note asking for help to escape. By that next afternoon, as gosney dragged his trunk toward a departing truck, more than a dozen others had decided to go. I thought i was going to die at any moment. I never thought that i would ever be permitted to leave. When the group reached the small airport nearby, gunmen opened fire. There was blood everywhere, and i thought im dying, and then i blacked out. That same day, gerald parks, seen here in the blue and white shirt talking with jim jones, sensed it was his last chance to get his family out. You can feel death in the air. You can actually feel it. The parks family asked to fly back with congressman ryans group. And i told him who i was and i said, weve been held prisoner here. At the airport, a tractor pulled a farm wagon up alongside their plane. About five or six guys stood up and pulled their guns up and started firing at us. I heard my mom holler, my god, look at patty. Gerry parks wife was killed. So was congressman ryan and three newsmen. Parks ordered his daughter tracy, her older sister, and three other youth to run for safety into the jungle. We ran too far, and, of course, its so thick that, like, once you get so far you cant you get lost in your direction. Before night came, we went back to the jungle and started hollering for the kids. And no response. And i thought, oh, my god, dont tell me theyre lost. I was the organizer, and anything that needed organizing they gave to carter. Tim carter, seen here in 78, was a trusted aide to jim jones. He saw jonestown through different eyes. It was beautiful. I mean, something about nature, being in the jungle, it was beautiful. Carter stayed almost to the end. He saw the gunmen come back from the airport. The tractor trailer that had come from the airstrip came up behind and stopped at the kitchen, and these guys jumped out. Bob kai said, we got the congressman. Thats when the reverend jim jones told his people this would be the day theyd have to die. The congressman is dead. Please get us some medication. Its simple. Its simple. Theres no convulsions with it. Its simple. Just please get it. The children were killed first. Tim carter saw his 1yearold son poisoned. Malcolm was dead, his little lips covered with foam, which is what happens with arsenic and cyanide as it foams at the mouth. He held his wife as she died. I put my arms around gloria as she was holding malcolm and just kept on sobbing, i love you so much, i love you so much. Carter lived only because he was sent away on a final errand. He came close to shooting himself that night. And i knew that i would never get the sounds and the smells and the sights of jonestown out of my mind ever again. So few survived jonestown. For most, only by determination born of desperation. For others, by a twist of circumstance. Over the next two hours, we will follow the lives of these survivors, then and now. Escape from jonestown continues. Hey terry stop they have a special so, what did you guys think of the test drive . I love the jetta. But what about a deal . Terry, stop its quite alright. You know what . We want to make a deal with you. Were twins, so could you give us two for the price of one . Come on, give us a deal. Look at how old i am. Do you come here often . He works here, terry you work here, right . Yes. Ok lets get to the point. 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A knack for predicting the future. Reflexes faster than the speed of thought. Can a business have a spirit . Can a business have a soul . Can a business be. Alive . When heartburn comes creeping up on you. Fight back with relief so smooth and fast. Tums smoothies starts dissolving the instant it touches your tongue. And neutralizes stomach acid at the source. Tumtumtumtumtums smoothies, only from tums. The reverend jim jones left no doubt as to who he thought he was. When i say im god, then i feel it well up in my soul and i see the sick healed and the blind see and the dead raised. In truth, he was a liar, a charlatan, a phony faith healer. This from that same sermon in 1972 talking about a 90yearold with a bad leg. His leg was healed instantaneously because he saw me as god, god, god, god, god, god, god, god watch this woman who jones said had a broken leg. A helper cuts through the cast. Now the leg was broken yesterday . Now run jones asks if she feels any pain. Jump up and down real quick. No pain whatsoever. Thats it. They traveled around the country and held these meetings, pulled these fake healings and fake miracles, and people, man, would shell out money like you wouldnt believe. This is gerry parks as he looked back then. He was fooled for years. But it was all through lies, fake healings and all that stuff. The man was fake. I know now that he was fake from the beginning. By his own account, jim jones was born on the wrong side of the tracks in a small indiana town in the depression years. At 21, jones became a student pastor by taking a correspondence course. Within a few years, he had started his own church in indianapolis, named it peoples temple, and opened its doors to africanamericans. He and his wife marceline became an interracial family through adoption and embraced racial harmony in an era that resisted it. But even then jones preached of catastrophe. At that time, the cold war was going on, and he was saying a bomb was going to fall and there would be a nuclear war. In the mid60s, jones moved his church outside the town of ukiah in northern california. So he got this revelation somehow to come to ukiah, california. And there was a cave out here. A cave in the hills around Redwood Valley that would shield everyone from nuclear fallout. I know now as sure as im sitting here and i knew and have for a long time there was no such place. It was all one of his lies. Jones built this church and offered sanctuary there, a safety net to the elderly and poor, usually blacks from the inner city. They signed over their Social Security checks, and the peoples temple cared for them for the rest of their lives. He built this whole thing on the premise of brotherhood, economic equality, and a world where no babies go to bed hungry. Gerry parks and his family followed jones from the midwest out to ukiah in 1966. Gerry got a job in a supermarket. He started talking about everybody giving 25 of their income. I sat down one time and figured after i got back how much money i gave that man, and it was around 76,000 bucks. His youngest daughter, tracy, learned to fear jones when she started school and was told to stay away from other children. If you got caught talking to people that were not affiliated with the church, then you would be in trouble for that. Trouble at jim jones wednesday night meetings. He called them catharsis, the purging of evil. So i was scared to do anything wrong because i was scared i was going to be called up and be beaten. Leslie wilson was 13 when she first encountered the peoples temple and the hold it had on members. What happened in catharsis . If you were doing something incorrectly, which nine times out of ten someone would find something you did incorrectly, you would be called to the floor and disciplined. How . Either by a paddle or being spanked. You were hit . Uhhuh. In front of the whole church . Oh, yes. Grown people . Oh, yes. Spanked . Yes. Who did the spanking . Whoever he deemed to do it. Her mother joined the peoples temple as a haven where leslies sister michelle, on the right, could get help for her drug problem. As a minister, leslie said, jim jones could be spellbinding. He could quote scripture and turn around and preach socialism. He appealed to anyone on any level at any time. Even so, racial equality came with exceptions. The majority of the congregation was africanamerican. The people who ran the church, the leadership, were they majority africanamerican . No. They were majority caucasian. The dark side of jim jones was always there. What did you have to call him . Father. Like he was god. Correct. Jones would boast openly in church about his sexual couplings with both women and men. For me sitting there listening to it, i thought it was insane. And i dont understand, soledad, why my mother didnt grab our hands and run like crazy when he spoke about having sex with men and women on the pulpit. I dont know what drove her to stay. Ill never have that question answered. Just ahead, rehearsing suicide. Five minutes later, jones says, youve all just been poisoned. You have an hour to live. This is the peoples temple membership, now numbering in the hundreds, in Redwood Valley, california, in the 70s. By then, tim carter was already getting an early taste of how it would all end. We had a very small vineyard on the ranch in Redwood Valley. And they said, hey, grapes would come in from the ranch and wed have wine, does anybody want some wine . And so each of us got this styrofoam cup threequarters filled with wine, drank the wine. And like five minutes later, jones says, youve all been poisoned. You have an hour to live. It was a test for jim jones trusted inner circle. They did not panic or resist. Now when i look back on that whole thing now, you know, you think that might have been the wakeup call that it was time to get out of dodge . Yeah, absolutely. That should have been i should have been gone the next day. Carter stayed on. He was a marine vet whod survived some of the worst fighting in vietnam. He came home bitter, a cynic, a hippie, and joined the peoples temple in 1973. That same year, jim jones reached a deal in guyana to begin clearing land in the jungle for a future settlement he would call jonestown. Jones chose guyana because its government was socialist, its people black and english speaking. It is a small country, not even a million people, on the north coast of south america. Beautiful Promised Land. Beautiful Promised Land. Those were jones words for his creation, a place where he and his people could practice socialism, live in harmony, and answer only to themselves. We wanted to have a better world, you know, a better society, one without racism, sexism, ageism, economic equality for people. Verne gosney joined the church in california about that same time. He and his wife, an interracial couple, were welcome. The peoples temple was a rich tapestry of people. They were people who had survived adverse situations, racism, discrimination, just very difficult lives, and they had triumphed to that point. In 1975, jones moved his Church Headquarters from Redwood Valley down to San Francisco to a larger stage where he became a Political Force and a face in photoops. Roslyn carter was campaigning for jimmy carter. I believe that was 1976. And there was going to be a rally downtown. Literally, we stuffed the building. We were the rally. This photo of tim carter with the woman he loved, gloria, was taken at the Golden Gate Bridge during another public appearance. When jim jones was asked to give the benediction for the new Suicide Prevention barrier that had been erected. Thats right. Only a year before jonestown took its own life, jim jones was praying over a Suicide Prevention barrier. In that summer of 1977, jones was facing increasing criticism from some members who fled the church because they no longer believed in jones. When new west magazine published an expose article about church beatings, jim jones suddenly decided to leave the country. He began putting his flock on planes to south america by the dozens day after day. Teenagers and Young Children were among the first to go. Parents followed. I got this phone call that says, its time for you to go, and this voice entered my head that said, if you dont go now, you will never see your child again. Leslie wilson had become pregnant at 18. This is her son, jakari. His father took the boy to guyana first so leslie followed. What was it like in guyana . Beautiful . Paradise . Not paradise by any means. Did it feel like you were in captivity . Oh, right away, right away. Your passports were taken right away, seized. And this did not raise red flags, or it did . It did. In your heart of hearts, you had to know that there was no way out. There was no way out. Tim carter praised jonestown in this testimonial. Its beautiful. I cant ive never been so totally happy or fulfilled in my life. As long as he was not being eaten up by bugs. You could see him scratching the bites. These are home movies made by jim jones to attract Church Members to his namesake. American bananas are nothing like these. He showed off the supplies. Flour, flour, rice, blackeyed peas. And then this. Koolaid. Koolaid. The reality of jonestown . Hard work, long hours, too much heat, too little sleep, and, as Leslie Wilson remembers, meager food. Dinner was rice and gravy and sometimes a soup with chicken feet sticking out. She wrote this letter to a friend there in jonestown. I now feel as if my whole being is being worthless here. Im now 21 years old, and my life will surely consist of nothing more than it does now. At the bottom she wrote destroy this now. But at a wednesday catharsis meeting my letter was being read by jim in front of the whole congregation. And if i could have crawled in that guyanese soil and dug a hole so deep, i would have done that. I was just in fear. Your best friend turned you in. My best friend turned me in. As punishment, leslie was placed on a hard work detail. For her, the Promised Land was a failure. Were not going to make a difference in the world because no one knew about us. No one cared. We were just this bunch of folks living in the jungle, surviving. The utopia was a hoax. It was a hoax. And that realization itself was overwhelming. When we return, a secret plan to kill. Cyanide is one of the most rapidly acting poisons. Id like to give about two grams to a large pig to see how effective our batch is. 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Serious, sometimes fatal, events including infections, tuberculosis, lymphoma, other cancers, nervous system and Blood Disorders and allergic reactions have occurred. Tell your doctor if youve been someplace where fungal infections are common, or if youre prone to infections, have cuts or sores, have had hepatitis b, have been treated for heart failure, or if you have persistent fever, bruising, bleeding, or paleness. Dont start enbrel if you have an infection like the flu. Joint pain and damage. Can go side by side. Ask how enbrel can help relieve joint pain and help stop joint damage. Enbrel, the number one rheumatologistprescribed biologic. As soon as gerry parks arrived at the entrance to jonestown in the spring of 1978 with his wife and youngest daughter, he saw guards with guns. I seen those armed guards. Thats when my heart fell. I knew then i didnt have to wait until i got to jonestown. I knew then that i had made the biggest mistake of my life. Reverend jim jones home movies helped lure parks and his family to guyana. It was going to be a city right in the middle of a jungle, made it sound like really a paradise. Instead, he found hell on earth. Gerry parks complained about the heat, the food, the confinement. Life dont get any worse than that. That was literally a jungle prison. In front of the congregation, jim jones told parks the only other thing you can do is either adjust or walk through the jungle and its meet snakes and panthers and all that [ expletive ] and one wants to do that and guns. Can be arrested by police and be put in a federal penitentiary. Jones would punish parks. He called me up front and he says, i hear you want to go back home, and they started beating on me. He had two or three security that were karate experts hammering on me pretty good. Parks was put on a hard work crew out in the hot sun digging ditches. In jonestown, even his 11yearold daughter, tracy parks, got up for work before dawn each day. I had to work in the rice fields. You had to use a big machete or the big rake that had the knife at the bottom, and you had to cut the grass down. One day she went to the infirmary with an earache. And they looked in there and pulled out a cockroach the size of my half of my thumb. Huge. Tracy parks saw no future in jonestown. I knew that in the first month there, that im stuck here and that im most likely going to die here. Verne gosney came a month after the parkses. He brought his 4yearold son mark. His wife had fallen into a coma during childbirth and never came out. Gosney sank into a haze of drugs. I did use heroin. I used amphetamines. I used cocaine, marijuana, lsd. He came to jonestown to get clean and did. Their idea of a drug treatment was, you know, work you 24 hours a day 7 days a week, and, if you mess up, beat your ass. I mean, thats their drug treatment program. He soon found jim jones controlled everything. Its a dictatorship. It was supposed to be socialism, but it really was fascism. Jones own words. This organization is built upon the dictatorship of the prola tearian. And i am goddamn it very much the goal. Jonestown was failing. Not much was growing in the fields. Most food had to be shipped in. And jim jones had begun to talk about another move, to communist russia. Long live this socialist dream thats beautiful. Church members were told to learn a new language. You had to Say Something in russian before you could get anything to eat. Little old ladies coming up there, older people, elderly people, you know, they couldnt do it. They couldnt memorize anything. And hed turn them away. Yet unknown to parks, unknown to gosney or almost anyone outside the inner circle, jones was already preparing for their death. This is a memo written to jones by the peoples temple doctor six months before the mass suicide. It reads in part cyanide is one of the most rapidly acting poisons. I would like to give about two grams to a large pig to see how effective our batch is. The test apparently was never carried out, but thats not the point. While in guyana, we made a startling discovery. The church had been buying cyanide long before most of the members arrived here in jonestown. Cnn has learned that for at least two years the church was buying a quarter pound of the deadly poison each month. By the time congressman ryan first began raising questions about jonestown, six pounds or more of cyanide had already been shipped here, strong evidence that the reverend jim jones had been plotting the death of his followers long before that fateful day. Were told jonestown had obtained a jewelers license to buy the cyanide, which can be used to clean gold, but there was no jewelry operation in jonestown. In that last year, jones never left the jungle camp, a prisoner of his own making, hiding from a Court Custody fight over this young boy he claimed he sired by another mans wife. Jones would summon his people to mass meetings they called white nights and rant about suicide if under attack by the cia or the Guyanese Army or other unknown forces. If youre not prepared to die for your children, you will not stand up for your children. For months, jones would tell parents their children might have to die. At some point, you will sacrifice your children. You have to make that commitment. At one meeting, jones tried to get gerry parks to promise to kill his daughter, tracy, if the camp were invaded. How old is your child . 11. We fight at 11 unless it came to an overwhelming invasion. Then we would gently put them to sleep which we have and they would never know what has hit them. Weve already prepared for that are. And i thought, you know what . Am i the only one in this cotton picking group thats got the guts to stand up and say, no, i dont want to commit suicide . From that moment on, gerry parks said he knew he had to get his family out. I knew those white nights he was having was fake at the time, but i also knew that one day one of them would not be fake. Next, running away from death. I was horrified. I was so, so scared. Is man kind . Are we good . Go see. Go look through their windows so you can understand their views. Sit at their table so you can share their tastes. Sleep in their beds so you may know their dreams. Go see. And find out just how kind the hes and shes of this mankind are. Can a a subconscious. Mind . A knack for predicting the future. Reflexes faster than the speed of thought. Can a business have a spirit . Can a business have a soul . Can a business be. Alive . In midnovember 1978, congressman leo ryan flew to south america to see jonestown for himself. Im from the United States government, and were here to inquire into the health and the welfare of american citizens who are here. A number of ryans california constituents were complaining that relatives were being held captive. His legal aide, Jackie Speier, who made the trip with ryan, was worried about ryans own safety. I placed his will, which i had custody of, in my top desk drawer. Reverend jim jones was worried some of his followers might try to leave. He warned the members. See if you can make it to any railway. See if you can get to any passport. Try. I dare you to try. You dont know who youre talking to. Just because i dont use the language of the church, i am that which they call god. That audiotape, like many others, was found later in the radio room of jonestown recovered by the fbi. I will see you in the grave, many of you. By now, jones was deep into drugs himself. An autopsy would show so much barbiturate abuse it should have killed him. Church member verne gosney. I do know what a person sounds like when theyre very impaired from either drugs or alcohol, and he was. At one point, he actually needed help walking. The day before congressman ryan arrived, jones said this. Im going to shoot them in the ass so bad for so long that im not passing this opportunity up. I dont care whether i see christmas or thanksgiving, neither one. They dont either. When ryan entered jonestown that friday, Leslie Wilson was waiting for the first chance to run away. I remember going to the kitchen and grabbing a butcher knife and sticking it down the front of my pants. Thats the way of the world jonestown put on a musical extravaganza that first night in this openair pavilion. An nbc news camera team accompanied congressman ryan. Youre watching their footage. I can tell you right now that from the few conversations ive had with some of the folks here already this evening that, whatever the comments are, there are some people here who believe that this is the best thing that ever happened in their own life. The cheering lasted more than a minute. Desperate to leave, verne gosney mistook nbc reporter don harris, in the blue, for a ryan aide. I tucked a note in his elbow as he walked by, and the note dropped to the ground. And i picked it up and gave it back to him and told him, you dropped something. And a small boy then shouted, you know, he passed a note, he passed a note. It said help us get out of jonestown. When i heard that i think verne gosney had passed a note that he wanted to leave, we were just like, oh, my god. As word spread, tension grew. Time was running out on jonestown for all the children and everyone else. Yet their last night on earth would end in song. No matter what they take from me they cant take away my dignity jones forced the reporters to leave and go back to the nearby town of port kaituma. Ryan and his aide, Jackie Speier, spent the night in jonestown. And i was awake a good part of the night thinking, how quickly can we get out of here tomorrow . Leslie wilson was thinking the same thing. A small group of black members hoped to walk out that next morning to go on a picnic, so they said. But at first her husband, joe wilson, seen here in yellow, a top Security Guard for jim jones, told her she could not take their son, jakari, but then suddenly he handed the boy back to leslie. And we immediately started taking off. And so to say i was panicked is i was horrified. I was so, so scared. Nine of them left. These five adults, plus three young daughters in one family, and leslies 3yearold son. And i started carrying him tied to a sheet on my back. They had to climb a hill in the open to leave. Everyone can look up and see us walking. I was just shaking. I was so, so frightened. They heard a truck approaching as they reached the thick jungle near the entrance to the compound. We dove in and hid the kids. Diane, who worked in the pharmacy, had made this is so ironic a cocktail of valium and koolaid for the children to keep them calm. Actually, we were so close to the guard shack that we could hear their voices, their conversations. The truck passed. Lesleys group found the Railroad Tracks nearby that led to another town almost mile away. We did not have a clue if we were going to make it to the next town, but we knew we had to leave. That railroad is now gone. Ripped up. The jungle reclaiming the root. All that remains is this railway bridge, which leslie remembers with dread. I recall a bridge. I have a horrible fear of heights. Horrible. It was an area we had across and i just hand to get on my hands and knees and cross it. Look closely and youll understand her fears. You can see straight through the Railroad Ties to the river below. She was really scared. I was scared, too. Robert paul joined up with leslies group just before that bridge crossing. He had been a Security Guard for jim jones and believed in jones until he got to guyana. At first he was so good and then all that evil came down. I thought id met god. But i met satan. Paul and another man also left that morning. The trek through the jungle was exhausting for everyone. It was hard. It was hard. We was really tired. How difficult was the walk carrying a child on your back . Oh three other little kids. It was a tough walk. But then, too, it wasnt a it was a freedom walk. It was a walk to freedom. A passing train stopped and gave leslies group, now 11 people in all, a ride over the last several miles. When they came to the end of the line in the town of matthews ridge, suddenly they came face to face with more fear. Walk up to the Police Station and then we have guns drawn on us. We dont know why. The captain proceeds to tell us theres shootings in port kaituma. Coming up, the last hours of congressman leo ryan and the reverend jim jones. vo you can pass down a subaru forester. dad shes all yours. vo but you get to keep the memories. Love. Its what makes a subaru, a subaru. When youre not confident you have complete visibility into your business, it can quickly become the only thing you think about. Thats where at t can help. At ts Innovative Solutions connect machines and people. To keep your internet of things insync, in realtime. Leaving you free to focus on what matters most. You could feel death in the air. You could actually feel it. Jerry parks had a sense saturday, november 18th, 1978, would be his last day in jonestown, one way or another. I knew that we didnt have long. I knew that if we got out of there, it was going to have to be pretty quick. Parks wanted his family to leave with the others who walked away that morning. I had clothes staged in a plastic bag in the tall grass where i worked. But then he saw someone approaching it. I seen him pick up the bag and start walking. First thing i thought, oh, no, someone has turned us in. So his 64yearold mother, edith parks, sought out congressman ryans aide Jackie Speier. Tim carter seen here overheard the conversation. And edith parks walked up to Jackie Speier, and said, im being held prisoner here. I want to go home. This is Jackie Speier walking back with edith parks to talk to the rest of the family. In this nbc video from that day. Tim carter will never forget what a jones loyalist said to him. And she goes, well, it looks like were all going to die. Speier taperecorded a statement by the oldest daughter, brenda parks. What is your wish today . To go back home. And where is home . The u. S. Jackie speier walked off to find jim jones. The woman she passed is patricia parks, jerrys wife, in the last hours of her life. Speier confronted jones with the defectors. He became agitated, tried to talk with them. He was sweating, beads of sweat on his face. Jerrys youngest daughter tracy parks was confronted by jones wife marceline. First off i thought this was the day that im going to die. Marceline left her an opening to rejoin her family. She said you dont want to leave, do you . I said, if you take me to them, ill talk them out of it. Jerry parks faced down jim jones. I said, what the hell have he done for me beside hold my family prisoner here for seven and a half months . As jerry parks turned away i look over there. And jones is sitting on the bench. And hes just sitting there a dejected, beaten man. Yet, another confrontation awaited jim jones when he sat down with nbc reporter don harris for an interview. Last night, someone came and passed me this note. Harris gave him vern gosneys note asking for help to go home. Thats who were talking about. He wants to leave his son here. If jonestown is such a bad place, why does he want to leave his son here . In fact, vern gosney had to agree to leave his young son mark behind before jones would let him go. All decisions around my son i well, you know, will haunt me for the rest of my life. Jones raged at harris. People play games, friend. They lie. They lie. What can i do about liars . Are you people going leave us. I just beg you. Please leave us. We wont bother nobody. Anybody that wants to get out of here can get out of here. They can come and get out of here. They come and go all the time. Who likes to play games. People like the publicity. I dont. The wind came up strong and it was just torrential rain. When the rain came, the parks family and others took shelter in an openair shed. Thats little tracy parks on the right in the blue windbreaker. Jim jones is there, too, talking with the bogue family who had been among jones earliest followers and now wanted to leave, as well. That really that sent shock waves through me. Jones moved over to talk to edith parks and her family. Young tracy was distraught. I was crying and wiping my tears with the hat. The tears were not anything other than i was scared to death. I was really down deep in my heart thinking, were going to die. This is the last shot of the reverend jim jones that day as his grip on people was cracking. The rain stopped. The parks family walked toward a waiting truck. Thats tracy again staying close to her older brother. As the group was leaving, another family was being torn apart. You bring those kids back here you bring them back one second. One second. Dont you touch my kids. This mother resisted when others in her family wanted to go. In the end, the family would stay and all would die. Emotions were starting to just become very tense. And i recognized that we were in a powder keg. This is vern gosney dragging his belongings toward the departing truck. He tried to warn the congressman they were all in danger. He told me i had the congressional shield of protection over me and that i had nothing to worry about. I thought he was totally out of his mind. Congressman leo ryan carrying the briefcase had planned to stay the night to help get more families out. Then a Church Member came up behind him. And all of a sudden he puts a knife up to his throat and he says, all right, mf, youre going to die. We all jumped on him anyway. We all got the knife away. You can see blood spatters on his shirt from the attacker, not ryan. The ride to the small airport at port kaituma was slow, bumpy and tense. And you could just sense the fear in everyone. You could just feel it like it was bouncing off each other. When they reached the airport, don harris asked a shaken ryan about the knife attack. Yeah, he said, something about rob and choke and kill or knife i dont know. What he said was he intended to kill me. Within minutes all three men here, congressman leo ryan, reporter don harris, and the nbc cameraman behind the lens bob brown, seen earlier the same day, would be dead. Shot by jim jones gunmen. Just ahead ambush at the airport. I looked out the window and i said, theyre killing everyone. Theyre killing everyone. Isnt it beautiful when things just come together . Build a beautiful website with squarespace. Go get help, boy. Go get help. Go get help right now if youre a cat, you ignore people. Its what you do. If you want to save fifteen percent or more on car insurance, you switch to geico. Its what you do. Go on kitty, kitty. You can now use freeze it to prevent new purchases on your account in seconds. And once you find it, you can switch it right on again. Youre back freeze it, only from discover. Get it at discover. Com. Devhighest quality,the clinically proven nutrition isnt easy, so at gnc, why do we do it . Why do we include key ingredients found in fruits and vegetables to create the worlds best multivitamin programs . Why do we do over 150 quality checks before putting them on the shelf . Well, heres why. Celebrating 80 years of quality life and quality products. For a limited time buy one vitapak and get one half off. The worlds best multivitamin program, only at gnc. We help you make all kinds of connections. Connections you almost miss. And ones you never thought youd make. We help connect where you are. To places you never thought youd go. This, is why we travel. And why we continue to create new technology to connect you to the people and places that matter. The feelings are just like it happened yesterday. 30 years later, tracy parks came back to this small airport near jonestown. Did you feel like you were home free when you got to the airport . Yeah, pretty much i thought, yeah, im going home. On that day, november 18th, 1978, 15 defectors got off the truck at port kaituma airport. Six in the parks family, seven with the bogue family, plus vern gosney and his friend. Thats vern walking toward us. When i got there, we unloaded and i had a feeling of foreboding. This man, larry layton, was a faithful follower of jones. He worried congressional aide Jackie Speier. The only thing that was really bothering me was that all of a sudden larry layton had and had decide that he was a defector. You just had a gut instinct. You just have intuition. Jackie speier seen here, got people moving toward this plane, a 19seat otter. Thats jerry parks walking with his wife. Tracy parks and her brother dale got on the smaller plane, so did larry layton and vern gosney. The pilots started the plane and we were taxiing, and we were coming down the runway to take off and then the tractor trailer with the assassins cut in front of our plane. This is that tractor and farm wagon. And thats when i heard the shooting, and i looked out the window and i said, theyre killing everyone. Theyre killing everyone. I turned and thats when larry shot me once in each side. Larry layton, the false defector. At the same time, these gunmen leaped from that farm wagon as it pulled up near the larger plane. The nbc cameraman taking this footage was shot dead. I really didnt know what was happening at first. I didnt know what the sounds meant, and then when i realized that they were gunshots, i just i ran under the plane. Leo ryan ducked behind a wheel but was killed. The only u. S. Congressman ever assassinated while in office. These are photos never seen publicly until now. Lying behind ryan, the body of nbc reporter don harris. This newspaper photographer also was killed. Jerry parks, 30 years ago. Shot the reporters on the ground and the congressman. They come from the pickup the dump truck from the other side and got off and stuck the guns to their head point blank and blew their brains out. Just shot them up terrible. The newsmen, the congressman and his aide Jackie Speier were clearly the targets. I was shot five times. But the first thing i thought was, oh, my god, this is it. Im 28 years old. And my life is over. Inside the larger plane, jerry parks was sitting across from his wife, patty, when bullets came through the windows. I heard my mom holler, my god, look at patty. And i turned around and looked and the whole top part of her head was gone. The tractor was over there. Her daughter tracy. When they started shooting down here at the big plane, thats when larry layton started on our little plane. He shot the two people in front of us. Then he turned around and pointed the gun at my brothers chest and the bullet we thought went off. He flew back and, you know, and acted like he had been hit and then looked down and realized he hadnt. Dale and i struggled with larry to get the gun away. Larry was hitting me and kicking me at that time, and i had to fight larry and i had to push up through the pilots seat and go out the pilots door and then ran toward the jungle. A few steps into the jungle gosney collapsed. There was blood everywhere, and i thought, im dying. And then i blacked out. Patricia parks body was pulled from the larger plane. Her daughter tracy back then. I didnt see her get shot but i saw her breathe in the plane and i saw her laying out on the ground. My mother was dead. They shot her, and my dad wanted to kind of not let me see that. Worried the gunmen might return to the airport, jerry parks told his two daughters and three other youths to seek cover. We got them into the jungle and told them to stay there, dont come out till we come back and holler for you. So where did you go . We just ran straight back through there, yeah. Straight in. Others carried a badly wounded Jackie Speier to the edge of the jungle. Unfortunately, i was placed on an ant hill. But you dont sweat the small stuff when youre dying. Reporters found the only painkiller in town. During the night, they would come and bring a bottle of rum and thats how i got through the night. Sipping on a bottle of rum. Jerry parks worries were getting worse. Before night came, we came back to the jungle. Started hollering for the kids and no response. They never came. They said they did but we went so far we couldnt hear their voices. I thought, oh, my god, dont tell me theyre lost. Next die with a degree of dignity. Lay down your life with dignity. Dont lay down with tears and agony. The end of jonestown. Ugh heartburn no one burns on my watch try alkaseltzer heartburn reliefchews. They work fast and dont taste chalky. Mmm. Amazing. I have heartburn. Alkaseltzer heartburn reliefchews. Enjoy the relief. 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Together, were building a better california. Darkness settles over jonestown on its last day of earth. These are the final words in this unsigned suicide note. Left behind amid the hundreds of bodies. Tim carter saw the reverend jim jones teetering on the edge that day. You could see his jaws getting a little bit tighter, you know, and his arms being folded. After the truck left for the airport, carter turned to his wife. I said, i think were all going to die. Hes going to try to kill everybody. Then an announcement over the loudspeaker. We walked up to the pavilion. It was very quiet. It was very somber. How very much ive loved you. How very much ive tried my best to give you a good life. This from jim jones in the last taperecording he ever made. If we cant live in peace then lets die in peace. He told his flock that this man, larry layton, planned to bring down congressman ryans plane. Theyre going to shoot that pilot and down comes that plane into the jungle, and we had better not have any of our children left when its over. He said the Guyanese Army would come through the jungle to torture them. When they start parachuting out of the air theyll shoot some of our innocent babies, and i dont think we should sit here and take any more time for our children to be endangered. This woman, christine miller, tried to argue with jim jones. I looked at all the babies, and i think they deserve to live. I agree. But also they deserve whats more, they deserve peace. Jones mistress maria called tim carter aside. She says, come here. I think i have something for to you do. She goes, we have three suitcases of money supposed to be delivered to the soviet embassy in georgetown. As carter prepared to leave, he saw the airport gunmen return. The tractor trailer that had come from the airstrip came up and stopped at the kitchen, and these guys jumped out and said, we got the congressman. Jim jones told his 900 followers. The congressman is dead. Please get us some medication. Its simple. Its simple. Theres no convulsions with it. Its just simple. Please, can we hasten with that medication . You dont know what youve done. At one point, carter saw the mistress maria whisper in jones ear. And he looked at her and said, is there any way to make it taste less bitter . So out loud she goes, no. Its not. And he said, is it supposed to be quick . And she said, yeah, its supposed to be quick. Please for gods sakes lets get on with it. Weve lived as no other people have lived and loved. Weve had as much of this world as were going to get. Lets be done with it. Lets be done with the agony of it. When the children cried, a jones loyalist told parents its just a little bitter tasting. Theyre not crying out of any pain. There are screams of agony. There are screams of terror. You can hear people crying. Keep your emotions down. Keep your emotions down. Children, it will not hurt. If you will be quiet. If youll be quiet. 303 children would die in jonestown that day from toddlers to teens. Leslie wilsons nephew and her niece. Vern gosneys son mark. A third of all the dead were children murdered at jim jones command wracked with convulsions, a painful death. I tell you, i dont care how many screams you hear, i dont care how many anguished cries. Death is a million times preferable to ten more days of this life. What i experienced and saw was absolute chaos and insanity. Die with a degree of dignity. Lay down your life with dignity. Dont lay down with tears and agony. Tim carter walked back to the pavilion and saw his 1yearold son malcolm in the arms of his wife gloria. Heres sharon cobb, the pediatric Nurse Practitioner with a syringe in malcolms mouth. Gloria is standing there tears streaming down her face. Just agony written all over her face. These syringes found later were filled with cyanide to kill the children. All theyre doing is taking a drink to go to sleep. Thats what death is, sleep. Malcolm was dead. His little lips covered with foam which is what happens with arsenic and cyanide is it foams at the mouth. I put my arms around gloria as she was holding malcolm and just kept on sobbing. I love you so much. I love you so much. I held gloria until she died. The vat, the vat. Where is the vat with the green bring it here so the adults can begin. Jones last selfserving words as the tape ends. We didnt commit suicide. We committed an act of revolutionary suicide protesting the conditions of an inhumane world. Jim jones did not drink the cyanide. When almost everyone else was dead, jones was shot in the head. Probably by a trusted aide. Before the end came, these three men tim carter on the left, his brother on the right, pr man mike prokes in the middle, were allowed to walk away from jonestown with the suitcases holding 500,000 in cash. We dumped the first suitcase in the fields next to the pavilion. They abandoned all three suitcases in the jungle. Authorities later recovered them. When the men paused to rest, carter said, he put a gun to his head. I knew that i would never get the sounds and the smells and the sights of jonestown out of my mind ever again. The three men walked on that night to port kaituma where they were taken into custody. A day or so later, carter and prokes were put into a helicopter and flown back to jonestown to identify bodies. 909 people lay dead. Many face down. Often the children lying hidden beneath them. As i walked through the pavilion, i identified what bodies i could. I saw injection marks in peoples arms. I saw one in the back of somebodys head. I saw them on somebodys neck. It was really evident to people that people had been just flat out murdered. Held down and injected the ones that didnt want to drink the poison. Several bottles of cyanide still sat on a table in the sunlight. This vat with the deadly koolaidtype punch rested on a walkway. A parrot stood watch over the dead. In the suicide hall, this sign those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it hung above the body of jim jones. I did notice jones body on the stage with the bullet hole in the side of his head, and i remember thinking, the son of a bitch didnt even die the way everybody else died. Jones body would be among the first to be identified through fingerprints taken when l. A. Vice cops arrested him for lewd conduct in the mens room of a movie theater, an arrest he fought to hush up. The airport gunmen in the farm wagon would all die in the mass suicide. Among them, Leslie Wilsons husband joe. Larry layton, the lone shooter to survive, would not be paroled from a u. S. Prison until 2002. Tim carter and his companion spent a few days in a Guyana Police cell, then were released. Four others in jonestown lived through the suicide night. Two men were able to sneak away during the slaughter. One of them, odell rhodes. He was telling people it wasnt painful and that, you know, people had to die with dignity. This 76yearold woman, asleep in the infirmary, was overlooked. So was one elderly man. Only 33 left alive out of almost a thousand faithful followers in jonestown that day. The rest came home in metal coffins as ostracized in death as they had been isolated in life. Many of the children could not be identified. Other victims went unclaimed. The unwanted, the unnamed were buried on a hillside, more than 400 in a mass grave here in oakland, california. I dont think society cared because they were nameless. They were nameless faces. Leslie wilsons mother, her niece and nephew are here. On a recent summer day she stood and offered an epitaph for the reverend jim jones. I would say jim jones was a psychopathic, hypocritical, egotistical maniac who wanted to go down in history. Unfortunately, he felt the need to take everyone else with him. When we come back, the lost children of the jungle. I pretty much thought i was going to die in there. We were hungry. We were thirsty. We had fevers. Escape from jonestown continues. Plaque psoriasis. Isnt it time to let the. Real you shine. Through . Introducing otezla, apremilast. Otezla is not an injection, or a cream. Its a pill that treats plaque psoriasis differently. Some people who took otezla saw 75 clearer skin after 4 months. And otezlas prescribing information has no requirement for routine lab monitoring. Dont take otezla if you are allergic to any of its ingredients. Otezla may increase. The risk of depression. Tell your doctor if you have a history of depression. Or suicidal thoughts, or if these feelings develop. Some people taking otezla reported weight loss. Your doctor should monitor your weight and may stop treatment. Side effects may include diarrhea, nausea, upper respiratory tract infection, and headache. Tell your doctor about all the medicines you take, and if youre pregnant or planning to be. Ask your doctor about otezla today. Otezla. Show more of you. The jungle grows right up to the edge of the airstrip at port kaituma. So where did you go . Which way did you go . We just ran straight back through there. With her mother dead beside the runway, a congressman and three others killed, 12yearold tracy parks ran for safety in the jungle. We ran too far and, of course, its so thick that, like, once you get so far, you cant you get lost and in your direction. She was the youngest of five who fled. Her 18yearold sister and a boyfriend, a brother and sister in another family. We just kept running and running and running. They feared the gunmen would be back. You thought they were going to come kill you . I just knew they were going to get us. I figured, well, they knew they didnt get everybody and they knew we were in there so we went in there, we wasnt even about to try to come back here. Even if they could have found their way. It was so dark, so pitch black that you couldnt see two feet in front of you in there in the jungle at night. The five of them climbed into a halffallen tree to spend the night. We heard shootings that first night but really it was the gunshots over in jonestown we were hearing, but so i we really didnt think we had anything to go back to. Or, you know, any parents or anything. So we thought they finished off the rest of them. They thought everyone else had been killed. They were too scared to come out of hiding. The helicopters were actually flying over. We could hear them and at nighttime they were shining a light down but we were hiding under banana leaves and whatever we could because we thought it was jim jones. I pretty much thought i was going to die in there because, you know in the jungle in. Yeah. I just we were hungry. We were thirsty. We had fevers. It was, you know, pretty all of us were sick. Pretty sure it was the second night we all had a little hole that was like a water hole. They sensed an animal nearby. And my sister said, tracy, be quiet. She whispered it to me. Be quiet. Dont even breathe. To this day they dont know what it was. By the next morning the youngsters wanted to be found. Wed see a light off to the distance, and wed get to running toward it and it would be a big hole up in the top where the sun was coming down through the trees. The group came to this river and started across. I almost drowned. We had our clothes on and boots and everything else, plus we were weak from no food and no water and no sleep. Tracy sank. Her sisters boyfriend reached for her. He looked back and i was i had went under already and swallowed a bunch of the yucky water and then he looked back and just kind of slowed down and grabbed me by the jacket and just pulled me over to the side. Saved you . Saved me. The river was close to the airport. They stumbled up to the military guards there who sent for tracys older brother. He come running up. Ill never forget the look on his face. It was like he had seen a ghost. Tracy was taken to a small store nearby. I just laid there, and i thought, ive already been through hell. What else could happen really doesnt matter. She was flown back to the guyanese capital to a reunion with her father at the Police Station. I knew when i saw him im going home. Im going to be able to go home. And that was the first time i had ever really felt that since the day i had hit the gates to go in. Ahead, 30 years of unending pain. Whoever said time heals all wounds didnt know what the hell he was talking about. Discover card hey so im looking at my bill and my fico Credit Scores on here. Yeah we give you your fico credit score. For free awesomesauce the only person i know that says that is. Lisa . Julie . Weve already given more than 175 million free fico Credit Scores to our cardmembers. Apply today at discover. Com devhighest quality,the clinically proven nutrition isnt easy, so at gnc, why do we do it . Why do we include key ingredients found in fruits and vegetables to create the worlds best multivitamin programs . Why do we do over 150 quality checks before putting them on the shelf . Well, heres why. Celebrating 80 years of quality life and quality products. For a limited time buy one vitapak and get one half off. The worlds best multivitamin program, only at gnc. But first, we have a very special guest. Come on out, flo [house band playing] you have anything to say to flo . Nah, ill just let the results do the talking. [crowd booing] well, he can do that. We show our progressive direct rate and the rates of our competitors even if progressive isnt the lowest. It looks like progressive is not the lowest ohhhh when we return, well find out whether doug is the father. Wait, what . Can a a subconscious. Mind . A knack for predicting the future. Reflexes faster than the speed of thought. Can a business have a spirit . Can a business have a soul . Can a business be. Alive . Usic thunder clatter by wild cub most weekends only last a couple of days. Some last a lifetime. Hampton. We go together. Always get the lowest price, only when you book direct at hampton. Com in a way, this is the youngest survivor of jonestown, chad rhodes. Just 19 when he was charged with murder and sent to prison for life without parole. His mother, pregnant with him survived the airport ambush the day jonestown died. On a winter night in oakland, california, in 1999, rhodes opened up with an Assault Rifle from an overpass and killed a policeman on the highway below. We heard a gunshot like boom, boom, boom, boom, more like four or five gunshots, yes, and then we heard a car took off from that area. Trouble has been a fellow traveler for many through the years since jonestown. Mike prokes, the pr man who helped walk away with the suitcases of cash, called a News Conference early in 1979. I refused to let my brothers and sisters and the others in jonestown die in vain. He got up, walked into the bathroom and shot himself to death. These two former Church Members outspoken critics of jones were shot to death in their home a year later in what police think was a family dispute. In 1984, in los angeles, one child was killed and 11 others wounded when a sniper, a young man whose parents died at jonestown, sprayed this schoolyard with gunfire. When Police Closed in, he shot himself to death. For survivors who lived through that last day in jonestown, ghosts return in different ways. For tim carter, its a smell. I cant smell almonds to this day. It will make me physically nauseous because cyanide smells like almonds and thats what it smelled like there that day was almond. For tracy parks it can be behind the wheel of her pickup truck. I still have fears of being shot driving down the street. I always feel like someone is going to shoot me. Yeah, it scars you. For vern gosney, it could be walking down the street. I could see a man with light skin and black hair from behind and in my mind i thought jim jones was alive. The airport shooting left gosney in a hospital for months. I was shot through the stomach. I was shot through the liver. My diaphragm was torn. My stomach had a was torn. Had a collapsed lung. My spleen ended up having to remove my spleen. At first he turned to painkillers. I was on antidepressants. I was on tranquilizers. I was on sedatives. Then worse. And i started drinking and i started using elicit drugs, as well. He had gone back to work in a San Francisco law office. When i look back on it now i dont even see how i walked around much less worked a fulltime job. It was so painful for me to be conscious i just really i drank myself to unconsciousness every day. In 1982, gosney moved to the island of maui in hawaii with another commune that collapsed. When he lost one job, he applied for another with the maui police department. I didnt tell them that i was a chronic alcoholic. I didnt tell them that i was a jonestown survivor. I didnt tell them that i was hiv positive. I didnt tell them that i had a drug history. After a couple of years as a cop, he hit rock bottom. Finally, he stopped drinking, stopped using drugs and kept his job. Ive been clean and sober for 19 years now, over 19 years. Life has not been easy. I lost two partners, two beautiful men that i loved and were partnered with that i lost to aids. The license on gosneys truck says it all. A license plate alive is a celebration of me being alive and surviving jonestown, surviving everything thats happened in my life. Survival for Leslie Wilson has been a 30year battle. The guilt of living was insurmountable. I did not want to live. I literally did not want to live. I did not want to be here. Five members of her family died the day she walked away. They know that i think i knew what was going to happen, that i just left them there to die. You left your brother behind. My brother. How old was he . He was 16. And it doesnt help when your father says, how come you didnt get your brother out . What did you say to that . I was going to come back for him. It wasnt supposed to end like that. Survivor guilt can be a poison in itself. You tried to kill yourself basically. Oh, for sure. I was very, very selfdestructive. Very self degree instructive. What did you do . Drugs the first. What kind . Cocaine. Cocaine. In the 80s. Started snorting it as a party drug. By five years later . Smoked out pretty much. In sacramento, california, in the mid80s leslie was arrested trying to cash a stolen check. Actually saved my life. Getting caught . Yes. Getting sent to prison . Yes. How much time did you serve . Only did five months. But it was enough time to clean you up . Oh, for sure, for sure. Even as she straightened out her life, for years Leslie Wilson would not tell others she was a jonestown survivor. So i just lived underground. I just dug deep and i lied and i changed my name and i pretended to be this person that i wasnt because i could never talk about my family. People would talk about their High School Reunions and most of my friends were dead. Today Leslie Wilson is a grandmother, works with medical insurance claims and has written a book about life and jonestown. But i want people to understand that we werent just names and not that we were human. And that we came back. It was not easy. It was not easy at all. Congressional aide Jackie Speier came back on a stretcher. I was hospitalized for two months. I must have had over ten surgeries. For a time she thought she had lost use of her right arm. How are you . Im Jackie Speier and im running for congress. How are you . Find fine, thank you. Very good. She ran for her murdered congressmans seat but lost in a hardfought fight and served almost two decades in the california legislature. Early in 2008, the leo ryan seat opened up again. This time Jackie Speier won in a runaway race. So help you god . I do. Congratulations. You are now a member. And was sworn in after 30 years as a freshman congresswoman. For almost everyone who did survive, escape from jonestown was not a single days journey. It has taken decades. It never goes away. Tracy parks tried to hide in a bottle. I just drank because thats how i hid my pain as a teenager. But nothing could chase away the feelings of chronic fatigue, constant stress and memories that came back at night. All the nightmares are i end up back there. Im trying to get out. Im trying to run through the jungle, and i know that i might not make it through the jungle. And id get up and literally have a panic attack. Have to open the doors and walk outside and get air. For jerry parks, it may be a little easier each year. But no one is home free, even at the age of 75. I found in myself in my case that i break down real easy. I can cry real easy over the slightest little thing. Whoever said time heals all wounds didnt know what the hell he was talking about. It doesnt. Coming up, return to jonestown. Did you not believe it was gone . I had to see it for myself. That it was really gone. Yeah. That no buildings stand . Yep. That hes not here . That hes not here. Hey terry stop they have a special so, what did you guys think of the test drive . I love the jetta. But what about a deal . Terry, stop its quite alright. You know what . We want to make a deal with you. Were twins, so could you give us two for the price of one . Come on, give us a deal. Look at how old i am. Do you come here often . He works here, terry you work here, right . Yes. Ok lets get to the point. Were going to take the deal. Get a 1000 volkswagen reward card on select 2015 jetta models. Or lease a 2015 jetta s for 139 a month after a 1000 volkswagen bonus. Take a look at these bbq best cracked pepper sauce. Most ribs eaten while calf roping. Yep, greatness deserves recognition. You got any trophies, cowboy . Whoomp there it is uh, yeah. Well, uh, well theres this one. Best insurance mobile app . Yeah, two years in a row. Well ill be. Does that thing just follow you around . Like a little puppy the awardwinning geico app. Download it today. When heartburn comes creeping up on you. Fight back with relief so smooth and fast. Tums smoothies starts dissolving the instant it touches your tongue. And neutralizes stomach acid at the source. Tumtumtumtumtums smoothies, only from tums. In the mid90s in atlanta, a fire left Leslie Wilson homeless. She called a hotline and was sent to this shelter with her 11yearold daughter. Ill never forget it was a church. My daughter walked in and she started crying. She goes, mommy, i thought with moments like that, what remains remarkable is this. In the years which have followed the horror that was jonestown, Leslie Wilson and other survivors have kept their faith. Despite jim jones betrayal of his god and theirs. How come youre still a religious person . Im not religious. Im spiritual. Whats the difference . I dont believe in organized religion. Because of jonestown . Oh, yes. It has a lot to do with it. It has a lot to do with it. A friend asked me how do you feel so much faith . You dont go to church. Let me tell you it was not an easy journey to get here. Tracy parks and her father have made the same journey. I do not follow anybody, you know, religion wise or anything. I believe in god on my own. I believe in god. I believe in christ. But i dont believe you have to attend a church to make it into the next world. Vern gosney stands apart, literally. His body from neck to feet is tattooed with eastern religious symbols. The gods and goddesses, mostly hindu. I would say im a pagan. A wiccan. Buddhist. Rather than renounce religion, he has opened himself to much of everything. Its a very important part of my life. Meditation, prayer, to whatever spark animates life. And i dont know what that is. Tracy parks prayer was to come back to guyana to the airport where her mother died to say farewell. I didnt think it would bother me like this. 30 years ago, tracy and her family had been unable to leave guyana in time for her mothers funeral back in the u. S. She brought flowers for a makeshift memorial next to the airstrip. This is harder than i thought. Of course. The words say simply mom. She left four red roses, a picture of her mother patricia parks, and a small, wooden cross, and then stood and said a silent prayer on the spot where her mother was shot to death along with congressman leo ryan and three newsmen. Why did you want to come back . For this. To make a real memorial . Yeah. I just wanted to say goodbye. Then, one last leg of the journey. Six miles over a bumpy road back to jonestown. One thing was the same as the day she arrived 30 years ago. First thing i noticed was the heat was unbearable. Everything else was different. An open field at what was the heart of the settlement. The buildings dismantled and carried away by natives. Jungle growth retaking the land, so thick our guides needed machetes. A few banana trees still standing. And this. The remains of one small tractor half hidden in the weeds. For tracy parks, what is important is what was not here. Its this is where it happened. So i had to bring myself back to feel the pain and the the fears. And see that its gone, really helped me. Did you not believe it was gone . I had to see it for myself. That it was really gone . Yeah. That no buildings stand . Yep. That hes not here. That hes not here. When one of the earliest members of the peoples temple arrived here in guyana he said jim jones told him the road to jonestown led in but it did not lead out. For 900 people who followed jim jones here, he led them only to the grave. The sign in the rafters in the suicide hall read those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it. Condemned to repeat it. Signs long gone. Part of the dust of history. But its lesson should not be forgotten. Im Soledad Obrien reporting from what was once jonestown in guyana, south america. The following is a cnn special report. A monster its my world a madman. I run with a pack of wolves and i got to be a wolf. A master mind of one of the most horrific killing sprees in u. S. History. What do you think will happen when i get out . The savagery that went on that night. It is uncome precomprehensible. Charles manson transformed a group of young women into vicious killers. Wa