65 is expected to double, and demand for medications, specialists, and life prolonging procedures are expected to skyrocket. But what does getting old today really mean . More birthdays, more bills. More walks, more walkers. More play, more pills. Sure, most of the time old age seems like all coupons and early bird specials, but what happens when the day comes that we cant take care of ourselves . Growing old is the one thing that will happen to us all, even if no one ever wants to talk about it. Meet tootie, a retired shop clerk from griffithsville, West Virginia. For someone who is 91, she is still doing remarkably well, still living in her own house where, like most of us, she hopes to live out the final chapter of her life. She is witty and resilient, even if she is a bit uncompromising, and shes also my grandma. Hey, goodlooking well, welcome to tooties bed and breakfast. How are you, pretty lady . Well, im here. You look good. Did you go to the doctor last week . Uhhuh. Yeah . What did the doctor say . Youre in good shape. Yeah. He did. The doctor said youre good. Youre clear. And she said i can stay by myself . And he said if thats what you want, you can. When i had my first heart attack, he said she cant be left alone, for three months. And thats been four years ago. They all say im doing fine. Yeah. How often do you come by, i mean days week . About two. She takes care of my house and her house, and she is my gardner, my chauffeur. Even though tootie still lives in her own home, she still needs help on a daily basis. I can do most everything, but i have a little help. Having a neighbor check in on her is crucial to tooties being able to live home. I get up and i open my drapes so someone knows that im up and im all right. Morning, tootie. Thank you. Tootie is lucky. Of her three children, two of them live nearby. My dad, ben, and his sister, my aunt becky. Together, theyre able to look in on her at least three times a week and help her with anything she might need. If tootie didnt have family that lived so close, she probably would have had to move out of her house a long time ago. It doesnt worry me about getting old. Ive had a good life. Ive enjoyed it. I just hope i have a health. Keep it until the good lord decides hes something different. Tootie still has an active life, even if it is maintained by her family. Every week someone helps her with her grocery shopping. Okay. And drives her to her weekly appointment at the beauty parlor. How long has tootie been coming here . She started coming when i first opened the shop 41 years ago. Wow. But this week tootie has a monumental event, her 74th high school reunion. And i get to be her date. One, two, three, big smile, toots oh, thats good. Thats a good one. There you are. Look at that, class of 38, lorraine spurlock. Are you the only one at your place . Im the only one i know of. I think youre a miracle. Tootie has lived in the same town for 91 years. She is a cornerstone of her community, and to this day, has friends she has known for decades. All right, sweetie. Well, bless your heart. How you doing . I dont get to see you very often, but i think a lot about you. We had some good trips, didnt we . We did. We had a good time. Yeah. That was a pretty great day. It was a good day. This is moms. Oh, man. Who is this guy . The guy with that mustache . Thats granddad johnson. Thats my granddad. And thats grandmother johnson. Wow. Who is this . Thats me. Thats you how old were you in that picture . Oh, probably 12, 13. Thats you being a smart aleck. For as long as i can remember, tootie has been the rock in our family. But in the last couple of years, it hasnt been easy for her. My grandfather passed away 13 years ago, and ever since then, tootie has been living on her own. There i am in the van. Right here i am. Thats you right there. Oh, yeah. Were you a good trombone player . I guess. First chair. Look. Thats me. A face only a mother could love. Thats me. You should never let me wear a jacket like that ever again, tootie. That should never be allowed to happen again. Good morning, toottoot. Youre already up and all over the place. Can i get you anything, tootie . No. Tootie, what time did you wake up . 5 00. 5 00. I just love that tootie was up two hours before i was. She is a machine. You cant stop her. She is pretty independent, if you havent noticed. So tootie, do you do anything to get any exercise . Yeah, i just do what i want to do. You still get around pretty good. Im thankful i can. Yeah. More than 70 of americans over the age of 65 will need longterm Care Services at some point in their lives. Keep stirring this, right . Yes. Sprinkle some in. Open it up. Even though tootie is healthy enough to live on her own now, she has had six major surgeries, and like all families, we worry. Well, bless its heart. And how are you . Im just wonderful. We got a custard pie. How are you, pa . Great. Good to see you. Nobody likes thinking about whether tooties situation could change, but just in case something were to happen, my dad and i are looking at other places she could live. Tootie looks good. Oh, yeah, oh, yeah. She really does. She really does. She looks good. Sharp as a tack still. Oh, i think tootie is very, very fortunate, okay, in a lot of respects. Tooties got two or three people that she can call if she has problems with the house or got a water problem or, you know, whatever. Theyre right there. Yeah. What do you think it would take for you and becky to make the decision that tootie would have to go into some sort of an assisted living or a rest home . If she were to the point that she absolutely could not take care of herself at all. Yeah. What brings you out here today . My grandmother is 91. Okay, okay. And my fathers mom. Okay. And so were just looking at, you know, some possibilities where she could possibly be in a few years. Okay. The needs of aging americans are changing, and so are the facilities that care for them. No a days, many of them are actually comprehensive care facilities that offer the benefits of independent living, plus a high level of supervision, dedication and care. This is the main dining room. We do not have meal times. The residents want to choose when they get up, when they are going to go to bed, when they want to eat. This is just a tv room, a little library. The residents bring all of their own furniture. They put all their memories on the wall. They make it very homelike. We provide all the care that they need inside this apartment. We have 90 beds in this facility. We have three different units. We have a 24bed dementia unit, a 28bed rehab. And then we have longterm Care Services. This is one of the 20 rooms on this unit. Each room has a private rest room. The rooms are very spacious. We do personcentered care here. Its getting away from the medical model, basically. We also have a private dining room. They can reserve it oh, thats nice. That is nice. It gives them a little privacy. Shes ready for wii bowling. Do you play wii . I do. It really helps with my ability. There you go. Nice way to go, beulah. Good game. Good game, beulah. Thank you. Thank you. The trend is to make places like this feel more and more like home. But the homier they get, the more expensive they are. If somebody was coming here, how much of the room is paid for by medicaid and medicare . Medicare will pay up to 100 days, and the first 20 days are paid at 20 . At 21 days, medicare drops down to pay 80 . Okay. But they will only pay as long as somebody is making progress. So its not really designed for someone who is coming here who will be here until the end of their life . No, medicare is not. And if somebody had to pay privately, what is it per month to be here privately . Its around 8,000. 8,000 a month . Yes. Okay. So bob, what did you think of those two places . The places are nice. But who wants to be there . Yeah. You want to be there . No. Okay. I dont either. They have a lot of activities, and theyre genuinely concerned about the people. I mean, it didnt feel like an old folks home. No, not at all. But what i about coughed up a lung on when she said its about 8,000 a month. I dont know who can afford that. Five years is a half million. People think oh, ill get on medicare, you know, im set for life. Huhuh. Would you rather live in a place like this or live in your house . I would rather live in my house. Of course. But that adds up quickly too. Sure. Just think about if you have to have somebody in your home. Thats 240 a day to have 24houraday care at 10 bucks an hour. So at ten days, thats 7500 a month . Youve got to have a lot of money to die right. When you see assisted living when you see assisted living places, does it make you think of when tootie is not going to be around anymore . No. I dont think about things like that. Maybe because its i dont want to think about it. Yeah. But youd have to plan for it. So what are the things that you have looked at for your own personal life care . I really havent. You havent . No. I figured youd be there. Its all going to be my responsibility . Yeah. By 2040, more than 81 million americans will be over the age of 65. Most of them at some point will need some sort of extended care. And just like my father, they havent planned for it. And they have no idea how much it really costs. Most private Nursing Homes cost an average of 77,000 per year. If youre wealthy, you can most likely afford a private option. But for the vast majority of americans who have paid into the system their whole lives, Social Security only gives you 1,230 a month and medicare only covers you up to 100 days. Thats not much help when today some experts predict the average person will need roughly 900,000 to cover their expenses throughout their retirement. A Staggering Amount when you consider that the majority of Senior Citizens have less than 30,000 saved for retirement. If you want to live forever, you better find a way to pay for it. No, i want to just kind of hear your thoughts on tooties financial situation. Oh, my. And where she is. Well, our dad when he retired, he opted or the them to, you know, take his retirement money and invest it. They were guaranteed a certain amount of money every month. Right. For 20 years. Well, mother has outlived it. And when it was gone, it was gone. So now all she has is Social Security. Wow. She has outlived it by six years already. Yes, already. Does she have any savings at all . As far as a savings account, its just about depleted. Yeah. You have to basically live on is that all paid for by Social Security . What . Like everything you have to pay for. Mostly. And how much do you get a month on Social Security . 1300 after everything is taken out of it. So thats after they take out medicare. They take out 97 for i guess thats medicare part. And then and i pay blue cross 257 a month. So what are all your other expenses . What are the things you have to pay for every month . I have nine different bills. My garbage. Thats 18 a month. My gas bill is all budgeted to 94. My electric bill. Last month it paid 139. My cable is 68. 53. And my phone was 52. 79 this past month. And my water is 68. 82 a month. So once you get your Social Security check, plus your other bills, that money is gone . Yeah. Yeah. No matter where you live, ageing is an expensive proposition. But more and more frequently, parents are having to rely on their children to help bear the expenses. My aunt sandy has been caring for her ailing father at her home. Hi, pop . How are you today . He suffers from dementia, and now requires 24hourcare. How old are you . Should i tell him . Ill tell him. 96. Tell him 96. 96. Yep. Well, i hated to tell that. I have took care of many people, but he surprises me. Yeah. He surprises me. Youre a surprise. Sandy is a Good Daughter . Oh, yeah. Because were a team, arent we . Uhhuh. Yeah. Okay . We had to make some significant changes to his room. We had to bring a hospital bed in. But because i wanted it to look like his room, i took the headboard off of his bed and i velcroed it to the wall. And this is where the ladies stay at night. They stay right here in the chair beside him. All night . All night. So if he wakes up he is not alone . He is never alone. 24 7, he is never alone. If im not here, one of them is here, all the time. Why did you decide to keep him at home . When you take someone with dementia out of their own environment, it usually increases the dementia. How much longer can he stay at home . Iont know. When my mother was living, my mother died a year ago. Before that, she and i took care of him. After my mom passed away, i realized that i couldnt do 24 7 with him because you have to be hands on, eyes on, all the time. Its extremely expensive. It can run 8,000 to 10,000 a month. And thats not covered by any insurance . No. Its money that he and my mom saved. So if he hadnt had that money, what would have happened . Oh, my gosh, i dont know. He has a Social Security, but thats not enough. We would have had to do the medicaid spend down, i guess. What is the hardest part for you . Just watching your dad deteriorate is hard. You can imagine what it would be like with your folks to watch them get a little worse every time you see them. Well, its like that every day. You make it work. You suck it up and go on. Yeah. Because i dont think i have a choice with that. I cant just walk away from him, and i wont. Yeah. See, now there, look at that custard pie. Wow. Oh, wow. Wonderful is this the one you made . This is the one i made. Is this yours . Yeah. Its good. Look at that. You did good. How did we do, tootoo . Ive told becky, somebody in the family had to know how to make custard pie. Youre it. Now ive got a big torch to bear. So tootoo, we were benji and i went and looked at retirement communities today. And i was wondering what your thoughts are on those types of places. Hmm. Yeah. This is tooties rest home right here. Its going to be tooties rest home as long as im capable. Yeah. I get up when i want to in the morning. I go to bed when i want to. I dont mind being by myself. I dont get lonesome. If i did, i pick up the phone. I got a lot of friends i can talk to. But we cant say that she is going to stay like this. I mean, mentally and physically. If we didnt live close to her that would be a different story. Okay. And if she didnt have a neighbor that was right here. That was willing to do the same thing. That puts eyes on her every day. Yes. If there wasnt somebody like that, then she would have to go live some place like where you were today. Yeah. And it may very well come, and she realizes that. And we talked about, you know, to where you might have to have some help. Yeah. I mean, it seems like you guys have talked about it a lot. Why do so many people not talk about this . I think people are in denial. Yeah. If i dont talk about it, maybe it wont happen. Right. Ill live forever. Ill live forever. And a lot of kids dont want to talk to their parents about it. Because they dont want to think about it. Right. And you dont want to think about it. Do you want to think about it . No. But i mean, the thing is the reality was when dad was in the hospital a few years ago, suddenly the reality hit home he is not going around forever. For the first time. For the first time. Did you assign a power of attorney to somebody in the family . Becky has all of that. If there is nothing that they can do, i dont want to be kept alive artificially. But i dont worry about it. The good lord will look after me when its time to go. So im all right. Im fortunate. I have a lot of good friends. And that means all the world. I have a lot to be thankful for, a lot to be proud of. And everybody says you have the nicest family. So i just pat myself on the back and go right on. I brought you a present. Can i open it . Yeah, you can open it right now. [ woman ] destination assist. This is ann. Where would you like to go tonight . [ male announcer ] its a golden opportunity to see how lexus effortlessly connects you to where youre going. Come to the golden opportunity sales event and experience the connectivity of lexus enform, available on all lexus models, including the es and rx. This is the pursuit of perfection. But for all these symptoms, you also take kaopectate. New kaopectate caplets soothing relief for all those symptoms. Kaopectate. One and done. I brought you a present. Can i open it . Yeah, you can open it right now. I got you a wii . Whats that . Its a video game system. Its something youll be able to play and get some exercise. Oh. Yeah. Here we go. Lets do bowling. All right. So what youre going to do is there is your player. Youre going to take your arm down, just like youre bowling. Youre going to go like that. Oh. You bowl, huh . Yeah. Okay. Then let it go. Oh, look at that, there it goes you go all the way. Nice see . You left two. There it goes. Tootie, youre going to pick up the spare. Youre going get the spare. Thats looking good. Looking good. Oh oh, goodness. Oh, my gosh. So youre good at this game. I love you. Youre sure sweet. Thank you. Youre a good somebody. How are you doing . Good. You look pretty as usual. Come see me. Youre sweet. How many years have you been coming here . All my life. Ever since they built this church. Id like to say good morning to you. Good morning. Its great to be here this morning. God has given us a beautiful day. But what a blessing it was this morning when i was able to open my eyes, stand on my two feet. I praised god for it. People ask the question is god still in control. Sometimes god seems so distanced from us, dont he . When youre going through something hard in life and you wonder where is god, god, where in the world you at . I need your help. But gods everywhere. He is everywhere. Wed like to ask you to bow your heads if you would at this time, please. Give me a big squeeze, lady. Okay, sweetie. I love you. When i grow up, i want to be just like you. Enjoyed having you. All right. Love you toottoot. Love you too, sweetie. Hello . Hey, pop. Is there any update . Like whats happened . I tried talking to tootie, and i just couldnt understand anything she was saying. Right. Tooties not doing well at all. Shes in the hospital, and shes out of her head. And its critical. Okay. And other than that, i dont know anything, okay . Should i plan on coming home tomorrow . It probably wouldnt hurt, you know. Okay. Okay, honey, i love you. All right, dad. Love you too. Bye. So ill fly home tomorrow. Its hard. I just saw her. I just saw her. She was having a hard time moving around and was a little slower, but was a really bad speller . Your word is. Cow. Cow. Cow. C. O. W. E. I. E. I. O. [buzzer] dangnabbit. Geico. Fifteen minutes could save you. Well, you know. Here we honor the proud accomplishments of our students and alums. People like, maria salazar, an executive director at american red cross. Or garlin smith, video account director at yahoo. And for every garlin, thousands more are hired by hundreds of top companies. Each expanding the influence of our proud university of phoenix network. Thats right, university of phoenix. Enroll now. Weve got a frame waiting for you. Good and close. Discover the new way to help keep teeth clean and breath fresh. New beneful healthy smile food and snacks. Hell love the crunch of the healthy smile kibbles. Youll love how they help clean. With soft, meaty centers, and teeth cleaning texture healthy smile snacks help keep a shine on his smile. Its dental that tastes so good. New beneful healthy smile food and snacks. Hey, pretty lady. Hey, can you see me . You see me looking at you . Hey. You want some breakfast . Yeah, you want to have some breakfast . I think we have french toast. Tootie hasnt really been awake today. When she does wake up, she is, you know, a little incoherent. Her blood sugar is really low. She is not really eating or drinking anything. And shes just not being very responsive. When you first brought her in, why did you take her to the emergency room . She has an infection in the leg and congestive heart failure. And her body with the infection is just trying to fight to heal itself. So its just a long, long process. Right. Of course, when youre 91, it takes a little while too, you know, to fight that. Right. To be strong. You doing all right . Oh, yeah. Ready for some breakfast, toottoot . You doing okay . Okay. Thats good. Youre doing great, toottoot. Shes not making a lot of sense, but shes awake. How are you . As well as can be expected. There is no preparation for the final yeah. Its going to be bad then, and i knew that. You just do all you can do. I guess. The beginning of the end. She opened her eyes and you think she is looking at you, but at times shes really not. Like you said the other day, telling me before i come in that she act like she is staring, but she really isnt look at you. So if she keeps progressing, then what will happen . The goal is to get her back to where she was two weeks ago. So she gets to the point where she was as responsive as two weeks ago, then, yeah. I think thats the best we can hope for. And then what will happen if she doesnt get back to where she was two weeks ago . She will leave from here whenever theyre able to release her to longterm care. Yeah. But she wont be going back home . Not right now. Yeah. That road is one day at a time. Yeah. All right. Love you. Love you too, honey. Let me know. All right. Thanks, pop. Howd you d9 out of 10. Iz today . 9 out of ten . Thats great. Nothing says, im happy to see you too, like a milkbone biscuit. Say it with milkbone. With odor free aspercreme. Powerful medicine relieves pain fast, with no odor. So all you notice is relief. Aspercreme. Tootie . Who do you need . I need everybody. They were giving tootie a bath when all of the sudden all the alarms started going off, and they dont know if she had a stroke or she had a seizure, but apparently now she is breathing again. Were going to leave her down. Theyre taking tootie now to get her ct scan. I think this is where theyre going to check and see if there has been any bleeding in the brain. Im so sorry. Oh my god. I tell you what. If anybody ever fought a good fight, its tootie. Yeah. She always made the comment that she was really cautious about buying something red because she knew i would bury her in the last thing she bought, and she didnt want to be buried in red. And i said well i dont think its going to be a while. I said dont worry about it. But not too long ago, she said i know youll put me in pink. So it doesnt matter. I said pretty in pink, you know. We can say yes or no on life support, you know. Well can say yes or no on feeding tubes, you know. Yes to a point, but at the point that the doctor says there is no hope, you know, then say thats it. And thats what she would want, and we know that. Ive talked to tootie enough to know that when its time its time. Were not there yet. Nope, not yet. Not yet. Because she didnt want any part of this. Good morning. How are you doing . Hi good morning. We wanted to meet with you for with your mother here and we know she is going to have to go to rehab when she leaves the hospital. Before she came in the hospital, she was by herself. Yes, maam. And functioning pretty well . Yes, maam. Basically, mother was able to do almost everything on her own for herself in her own home. Its hard when you go through this, because she was independent. Yes. Right. But now at this point she is going to need help. Yes. Probably with all that okay. What we can do is look at a skilled facility that would probably be the best option for her, because if she needs longterm placement after that and she cant get back home, what would be the best option would be to go look at a couple of facilities. Well, morgan and i had visited the one, and very nice. Yes. And if they can take her, then, you know, really well do all the paperwork, and theyll do all the assessing, try to make it as easy on you as possible. See how she does. It would be a good trial period to go there and see if she is able to get back home. Im sure thats probably what her wishes would be. But if she cant get back home, they have longterm care as well. You sign here. Transport. Very good. After having her released from here today, were headed to rose terrace with her for physical therapy. We dont want her to ever think that she is not going home. Thats why were going to physical therapy. Not a nursing home. So lets show you back to her room. Okay. We have your mom here. Very good. Its right next to the door. You can actually come in the back door. Its very nice. Yes, a pretty facility. The dresser is on the wrong side of the bed for her, but thats okay. We can move it. That would be good. So she has been in thomas for . 20 days. Wow. Weve taken some up and down trips over the last 20 days. Thank you, sir. Youre welcome. Deep breaths for me. Lets take a look at your skin, lorraine. Its tootie. Do they call you tootie . Yes. Hi, sweetie. Yeah. Youre going to stay right here and theyll take care of you. Okay. This is the last one im going to ask you to sign today. Its consent to treat. Basically, its just allowing us to treat her here, and that were allowed to bill her benefits. And it also starts going in to how to apply for medicaid. Lots of people in West Virginia use medicaid to pay for Nursing Home Services if they stay longterm. I got you. And then this talks about what medicaid doesnt pay for. The first 20 days she is here through rehab . 100 . And then the next 79 days medicare pays part and her insurance will pay the balance . As long as she meets the criteria of skilled services. If she doesnt have a specific plan that pays for longterm care, you can choose to pay privately. And thats 265 a day. Some people dont have that. And typically, thats when they make application for medicaid services. Its a tough, tough transition, and its a tough decision. Lets see what we can do, and then well just take it a day at a time and see what her status is. Thank you for entrusting us with her. Were all on the same team. You betcha. You be a good girl. You work on therapy now. And ill see you tomorrow. Yeah. Youll be right here. I know. Youll be here. You be good, girl. Dont fight with the nurses, okay . Byebye, honey. Love you. Love you too, sweetheart. Get some rest, will you . I will. Okay. 20 minutes. Thats all it takes you to get here. 20 minutes. E . [ male announcer ] thats why theres ocuvite to help replenish key eye nutrients. Ocuvite has a unique formula not found in your multivitamin to help protect your eye health. Ocuvite. Help protect your eye health. [ male announcer ] its a golden opportunity to discover the heartpounding exhilaration beyond the engineering. Come to the golden opportunity sales event to experience the precision handling of the lexus performance vehicles, including the gs and allnew is. This is the pursuit of perfection. Lorraine tootie spurlock, 91, of griffithsville passed away monday, january 26th, 2013. She was born july 28th, 1921 in yawkey, West Virginia. She was also preceded in death by her husband proud spurlock and two sisters. She was a homemaker, a charter member of the church, member of the womens club. She enjoyed doing hand work, reading, and cooking for family and friends. Her kitchen was open just like her heart. Few people have ever lived 91 years like tootie did. Her life was filled with joy and she smiled and laughed, hugged and loved. What a lady she was. She was a cornerstone of our community. We now commit her body to the ground, back to the dust. And shes gone the way of all the earth. She was the real deal. She was the real deal. Lets give toottoot a kiss byebye. Heres me and toottoot. Here she is with her cake. Here is becky and toottoot. Tootie had three children, four grandchildren, nine great grandchildren. She was a wife, a mother, and she lived surrounded by the people she loved. Today were living longer than ever before. More birthdays, more anniversaries, more time with the people we love. And sometimes it feels like it can last forever. Maybe thats why its so hard making all the decisions we need to about growing old. Good to see you. Because saying some things out loud can remind us how quickly everything can change. Love you, pop. Love you too. Yall be good. We will. Be careful. We will. Okay . Love you. Love you too. Captions by vitac www. Vitac. Com an unspeakable crime. An unlikely criminal. The ultimate tabloid murder. Your thoughts on this andrea yates story . Its a horror. This was the very definition of madonna and child turned upside down. Five Young Children dead at the hands of their own mother. She was the sickest woman id ever seen. She may have been in left field, but she was in the stadium. Was she simply coldblooded, or was Something Else to blame . If you commit a crime and found not guilty by reason of insanity and its a ve