>> what do you tell them when they say, son, this hurts us. you're hurting our hearts. >> i am who i am and i'm not going to change that. i can't change that. it's just part of who i am. and as loving parents of a loving son, on some level, they should be accepting of that. and they are outwardly, of course, but it's still lurking there underneath the surface. they'll always harbor some sort of regret or anger towards me for just being who i am. and that kind of hurts. coming up -- >> i almost wish i still believed in god. >> closeted and in the clergy. >> nobody knows my secret. >> living a double life. >> i was on any knees wishing i could go get my god.