having a career, for not being able to build my own life my own way, and having to rely on others for support. it's a dull, intense, burning pain that can be anywhere in the body, or all over, and those days ijust ask, 'who's got my voodoo doll today?’ told us that, of those who lived with chronic pain, nearly a quarter are taking some kind of opioid painkiller and more than 40% of this group started taking them five years ago. it's these drugs, powerful medication taken by millions of people, that, for some, is posing an additional danger. i get this overwhelming rage. i never thought i could be capable of murdering somebody but when i'm in withdrawal, i couldn't murder. i want to hit my horses, which is so against who i am at core. but if i ever did that, i wouldn't — that would be it.