Give it. Up this morning. It's. Just. That and. Just. Connected to and. You know. That was Justin Timberlake in rock your body will go far be it cold up next you're listening to bring up golf Oh no no B.B.C. Newcastle. Yeah I'm Stephan petty and this is driven off the hul of new comedy talent NE but who is this new talent why it's members of the public people like you yes from across the northeast a record company for radio for the very 1st time and tonight tomorrow one of the Take Me Listen to this show. We find the funny in Christmas shop and we get some kids Christmas cracker jokes I'm going to tell you the top 10 things out of annoyed me this week so many and pick behind the doors of Number 10 is the tinsel traces a kiss and we will supply the music to whatever you would do well sure could help starship and I will block but no it's still the new it's Christmas by Daddy it. You. Pole was a great up north and I'm Stephanie petty and I've got a pianist re a Christmas cracker at jokes can be truly awful in fact here's a couple for you know these are my favorites I got this year. What do you call a boomerang back a stick. What a snowman where all the heads ice caps. What do you give a dog for Christmas. Yeah that's terrible on the however I spoke to the lovely children with big middle school and all folded and then asked them for their Christmas Krokus how of going to be honest we came up with some belt as to a Believe me if you don't like it and both were written by a little kids it's Christmas. So we'll figure Do these are some of their favorites Why was the school mom looking for the carrots very simply he was picking his nose . What a summer day with fun elves he sends an elf all. This was a personal favorite wanted to do when he went speed to pull the truck or. The very cheeky little boy goes out with it with this what is maybe a result for a Christmas dinner. Other this one before but it didn't. Want to as favorite. One that's Crispin even. Let me give this one. Why did the wanted for Rudolph a blitz not because the 2 D.S. . How did Marion joyous of know that Jesus was 7 pounds 6 ounces when he was born because the how do we in a manger. Last but not least. In the Christmas. What do you call a blind read. Lots from Mrs Mark Rich. And famous. Oh if you enjoyed those jokes I'm sure the split. Gets a bit of this year however funny movie children with Rick middle school for supply . But no it's the crunch and. a. B.B.C. You cancel B.B.C. Radio for the northeast. Best place to find. Me and my friends at the table do. Them in a conversation with just me and trust me I'll give it to. The man in the. Short . Run before somebody like me come in handy. The money can come in now if only. To see. Him pull out the magnitude of the. Buddy that is actually in. Some other issues like he needs to let some. Come in. And. Come in. With. Something. We came we came we go in now on the 1st day of doing the Super Bowl you can. Play with. Our entire families do in the. Evening and the taxi. Driver make. Sure. Somebody like me come and see me free. To. The least. Coming. At you when you. Think you need something in. Common. With. Ed Sheeran there install a ship is up after this sketch clean up an old B.B.C. New Castle and B.B.C. Radio for the Northeast F. And petty and it's tight now for some brand new original company from the grid. That's new talent from across the Northeast who are writing comedy for video for the very 1st I mean all sketches a gun teed festive fresh I mean this is critical north and it's that was seasonal deletes our very 1st company opens takes us back into a whole set the scene it's nearly 19 seventies everything is brown and orange all the men. And I wearing that a lot of vests and Mick not a worse there's been trouble but mine. Excuse me Prime Minister Yes Raja's you're a woman some bad news from North there's been an accident in a mine well it is 971 and health and safety hasn't been invented yet they'll get over it yes and it was probably caused by a woman. The name of the mine is the brown speck tinsel mine my God My God woman this could ruin the government what you expect people to decorate their trees with bacon This is just not shiny enough No No Roger is a comp why don't we stockpile this precious metallic stuff but it's only have I'll tell you what it only is Raja's it's only the end of the world don't you get it no tinsel means no fake silvery tinsel trees it means no Blue Peter Advent coathanger thing a new office party Prime getting sauce old and pretending to strip with a pink tinsel bow wrapped around her bosom while trying to snog all and sundry I call even think of that not happening really he is you're going too far but what about the riots remember the great tinsel riots of 873 Do not underestimate the British people's affection for twinkly paper banners you might think that was crime resource on a Christmas that is but no it was blood but buts about it this is a disaster why don't we hand over the north when we join the E.C. Down the French I will say however there is one good thing to come of these oh you think so Raj is a Yes Prime Minister the tinsel shortage has delayed what the young people call glam rock by another 6 months. starship a nothing's going to stop us No I will block it Perry in the Goo Goo Dolls a room next to no B.B.C. New Castle and B.B.C. Radio for the northeast yes it's great it roll off the hoop of new. And he has a brand new fresh new sketch fresh off the year the presses it will buy the team and I'm going to see fellas if you'll let me have you do me a Christmas shop and he's doing the traditional man thing a buy every present and Christmas Eve. Of them you should be like this fella he with the shops early. Afternoon can I help you yes I'm looking for a Christmas present from a one to nice jacket perhaps double breasted not that lucky. We do have a nice range of fur coat goodness gracious no she loves the animals will never wear fur but are not a problem at all sir all of our goods are completely ethical they are. 80 pounds 80 pounds and. They're imitation fur they're not real what they're invisible so I know what she does like do you have those globe things that hung down from the ceiling and reflect the light glitter pole No I'm just wearing sparkly underpants. Good scripts that. . In the float. Shot into the Japanese. Food supply dogs are barking. Up the folks who abandon. Ship and this. Is supposed to soothe. The displays of. The need to keep up with the Jones I love. Some old. Just new clothes. A cozy little Christmas here with. A semester plan to send to take the chaotic day out of my songs such as he would call an intro. In a whisper it's like to ski. Ing to be told no. To such a school soon mom and pops a blow job. That's close to myspace and slow. News on a musician. Song. With. Out and. Take. Well can you. Please. Katy Perry then the call to ship still to come out no. Radio for the northeast but now ladies and gentlemen and it to the regular feature where I Stephanie petty give you the top 10 of people and things that have knocked me off vexed isn't just me it is filled of hear it it's a terrible word but I tell you what it is better than you'll see what happened this week. You return it's your wife tell you not to make a fool of yourself at the B.B.C. Stop Christmas party. Fresh at night it's people who call the site. And serve at the bar. However there's a queue. And if it's cocktails I. Seem to really think that you've had to drink and. What's between friends. You at 7 bombing they laugh at you with the way you pronounce move he dual. Freshet 6 getting given the vegetarian option is a meal as you kicks the wrong box on the already. It's just carrots. Returning in 5 if it's drinking more with. It's a good idea to talk deals or government to take the food is that. Brought you a full cup of a 7 rude variations of B.B.C. Stand for and no one else on your table find in the phone and. Stay in it for a it's referencing to let you bring in your room to eat on the premises so you've got a pitch is there food. It's a to school. Bus on the dance floor. And it won't. Remember that you forgot to tell your boss that he was supposed to catch you. Apparently supposed to get attraction in the New Year. eh eh eh. That was the Goo Goo Dolls and Iris pig's new truck is on the corner shop is next but I want to tell you without being this new this week on baby Stephan Petit I'm the host grinning off and if you haven't heard a baby she said Well it's a new way to the secret read you if you missed the 1st day this week I'll be listening to the Dead Ringers Christmas specials if you have a list before. The really really funny junk John Riven still be in Lewis Macleod now you probably know John Riggins and Lewis you might not know as well but you've heard them on loads of adverts and loads of T.V. Shows because they greet impressionists the A provide the famous voices and laughs and have a look at what's happened this week using those celebrity faces now if you want to have a listen you can tell the of the OP to your mobile device and then download the shoes you want to hear. About put on your call maybe list the tool as well or you just hit the moat see if you're off to the gym you know you don't have to put a ring of make someone you know on the treadmill how life is well I mean that's just one of the many things that's on their. Have a Dell vid you will not be disappointed as a promised you will call the shop. Live That was. Pink is next but right now it's time for some brand new original comedy from the great naughty new talent from across the northeast comedy for the radio for the very 1st time of those it all see it my children should be seen and not it is well to be here very true because I'm going to be written just like this little strange voice that. Once today called Ma. Thursday know what day is 8 what you heard about where we had Christmas Eve Then we had Christmas Day then yesterday was Boxing Day So what's today it's St John Ambulance day. Is out of order to be able to elbow to sick people those afflicted with having too many minutes please MA What's tomorrow the day after the day after box Indy get me out of the house quick because we've all been stuck indoors for 4 days running with nothing but spring and honest forgetfulness to keep us entertained so people can't wait to get a dog and the day after that's Gregg's day they sponsored it feed a fortune to the government now and a day after is traditionally when we get bored and go outside to add suggestive extras to I was SNOW What's that called snowboarding Ma and the day after that's called Lucky kids in the cupboard under the stairs because they keep asking stupid questions day. And that a beautiful song by Pink it's a 1000000 which is a couple from. My Christmas. Close my Not was picked in a 1000000 Dreams Still to come of this the poor call them full and but right now only is unsettling when you sketch from the ground up north and it's about the American look Christmas in the biff a baby Jesus I mean it's a wonderful thing but what actually happened was wonderful I mean how did Mary break the news to Joseph while Gretel Dolph is proud to bring you the actual come the season between the 2 of them but when I see actual I mean it's being made up by all right as. You say yes Mary love we need to talk. No god has ever called from North forwards What is it I'm pregnant I'm with child in the family way you've lost me got a bun in the oven What we haven't even I know you and I know and it's not like have a one to 2 you know I've caught a glimpse of you in the shower talk about little donkey. Appear to be though how did this happen the usual way beam of light angel came down big to him what not like that he just said on to be a child will be born and flew away and they were not married yet but we are true and I'm sure we'll have a stable relationship and it was a shock and it will be hard to make ends meet at 1st you know going to demand all of the sixpence of toys and games my 1st child I'll spoil it if I want you know or go oh I hope it's a good you can get lovely robes for girls and shoes off I've even thought of a name if it is a girl what's per 2nd oh well that's nice bubbly name we could get it but ties by Rabbi Williams I would bank balance can't take that will cost a fortune No it only takes a minute and if you let me book him I'll let you know when the baby all right then put normal spending promise when he gets older we'll have to pay for donkey driving lessons Jesus Ben will be temple tuition fees Christ not bad those 2 names go together quite well. Strange enough that's what my doorbell stick on that little is judgment it's time for a fairy tale in New York the pool. Was sleeve. Insurance. But no my son. Sleep in the. Sun. But sir. Surely the slower. That was the. Godfather gentlemen off. The grid off the new comedy The Northeast I mean new talent well its members the public people like you all the way from across the Northeast who are right comedy for radio for the very 1st time I would love for you to have a good writing some comedy for sure to. Write work. For free and talk about a little bit about comedy. Some new skills some new people and maybe even get your material performed on there now if you want to find out how to do this. Kind of the search engine take up golf this will take you to a web page for what apply for the mean you soon I'm Stephanie The show host I'll be there and that's what it's going to be great to see is right now though it's food. And we are young. Just across the.