These young widows who lost their spouses to COVID-19 are grieving through a Facebook group
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Updated: 6:51 PM EST Jan 29, 2021
By Nora Neus, CNN
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Updated: 6:51 PM EST Jan 29, 2021
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He just always carried on this, like light into a room. Frank was like a huge teddy bear. He was going to take me Teoh a lighthouse on our sixth anniversary. But it was a total surprise and I didn't even find out about it until he passed away. He just he made me a better person. Whitney, Pamela, Christina and Diana have never met, but they have had toe welcome each other to a club none want to be a part of. He called me and he was like, sobbing. And I've never heard my husband cry And he just said He's so scared. Their husbands, all young Onley in their thirties or forties, are all now dead. I just remember going I just got a call two days ago. Oh, he was doing better. Like what? It all happened so fast. These air, the Women Cove, it has left behind the widows left to pick up the pieces after the pandemic shattered their world. There are also all mothers strong for their Children and kept strong by them. He just loved being a dad. That was the biggest joy of his life. Row your boat gently down the stream. E just wonder where you find that strength, Pamela. So because I know that Martin would want me to be happy and live my life, I kind of think about that every day with the kids. They're running in the huge yard that our house has. And that was what he envisioned when we bought this house. He was such an involved that he did everything from take her to the zoo to take her thio. Little Jim. I never had to ask him to help me with anything. He thought the floors weren't clean. He would just sweep him. He was. He sounds amazing. Diana's husband, Juan, was taken to the hospital in the middle of the night. He never came home for their five year old daughter, Mia. It changed everything she tells me. You know, I'm afraid that something's gonna happen to you. I'm afraid you're gonna die. And so she you know, she just can't go to sleep. I just remember calling her in the room, and I you know, I was crying and she was just like, What's wrong? Is Daddy okay? I was just like daddy. Daddy passed away. He's not going to come home. But she's so much like her dad. So logical like, Well, you know, Daddy's not here, but I don't think he wants us to be sad all the time. And I'm like, Yeah, that's true. How are you teaching me about Gri? Christina Scorpios husband Frank died on Easter Sunday. Their baby boy was just six months old, his older brother, Francesco. Not even five. When Cristina read that Pamela Addison had lost her husband, Martin, to co vid, she put pen to paper and wrote to a woman she'd never met about a grief she knew all too well. She knows exactly how I feel, and I know exactly how she I felt so alone after Martin died. So I thought I was the only young widow, and you really weren't hearing the stories about the young people dying when I opened up her card. I think one of the first thing she said, is like you're not alone. And at that moment, the weight of feeling alone was like lifted because now there was someone else who understood. Because of that letter, Pamela started the Facebook group, young widows and Widowers of Cove in 19. She's my inspiration for why I decided to do it. It became a place for Diana or Don's and Whitney Parker to go after their husbands. Juan and Lesley died quickly from Cove. It you Diana called want the other half of my soul? How do you cope with that now, with meeting with me and with your little girl? Um, you know, I try to remember I can almost still here what he would say to me in certain situations. There's this empty silence where his words would once be. You know, I don't know if it's coping, but I just kind of I let myself feel that I'm thankful that I have the voice. Yeah, it's ultimately have a piece that have been here with me there, half of him. So I got lucky that they're here with forever grateful for that. It is part of my life in them a Give them to me. Ah, shared grief, but without a shared embrace, able on Lee to comfort each other through the cold hard screens of their computers. He was only here for 31 years, but he really did so much in those years as the months pass and the world keeps moving on. These four women are left with their acute pain, accentuated by their isolation. For weeks after he passed, I would wake up sadly in the middle of the night, and I would reach for my phone thinking I missed the call and Mr Call from Oscar. And then you realize, No, you know you already passed. You have to, like, tell yourself the story again. But alongside their profound grief is their deep belief that each of their husbands is looking down on them. Sir, you want to say to them everything I do every day. I'm so glad to have spent the last 11 years of my life with him. Every time I hear Santino say Dada, it's like Frank sitting on the couch having a cup of coffee. Thank you for Elsie and Graham there, my sunshine. Their healing is only beginning, but at least they now know they're not alone. Separated by a pandemic but connected by their collective grief, they persevere. Poppy Harlow, CNN, New York